Five moments Bo when to say I Love You
and the one time she did
I. The Lab
It's a check-up. Lauren's fingers were running over her skin, blunt nails brushing up her arm before she placed the sanitizer over where she'll give her a shot, next. There's a moment, when Bo looks up and see the stark contrast of light and shadows on Lauren's face. Her hair was slipping from behind her ear, and blonde is falling over her shoulder.
It's a moment, a brief moment, and Bo licked her lips nervously as the feeling bubbled up inside of her. "How was your weekend?" She asked Lauren. Brown eyes looked up at her, a smile pushing at her cheeks, that brightened all her features, was now staring at Bo with the gentlest look she could ever receive.
"It was good, there was a fair amount of work, but it was fun," her eyes lit up momentarily, as she shrugged her shoulders before turning around and grabbing the needle.
"I'm glad," Bo says before she's given her shot. There's a snap of rubber gloves afterwards, and the sound of Lauren disposing the needle. It's all very doctor-y and makes her smile. When Lauren turn back to face her, Bo quickly invites her back into conversation before Lauren can ask her to leave. "We should get a drink some time, at the Dal - and I promise, no Dyson."
There's an honest smile there, again, reflecting back to Bo as her eyes look down at the black pants Bo's wearing. She nods her head, raises her eyes and nods again, "Okay," she whispers.
The feeling's back in that moment. Bo tries to blame it on mixed feelings, tries to pretend that it's because she really, really likes when Lauren smiles, and there's the smell of science in the lab and it's so very Lauren. She tries to be honest and make excuses at the same time, but the words build up in the back of her throat, and suddenly neither of them are smiling any more.
They're staring at each other, and Bo has her hand on Lauren's, "Lauren," she whispers softly. The words are there, stupidly, there. Infatuation, she hears in her head, and then something else, something that eats at her in the middle of the night.
Everyone you love, always ends up leaving you after you say the words.
And it's true, in a sense. Kenzi being the only exception, and there was nothing but friendship and sisterly love there anyway. So she smiles at Lauren, pulls her hand away, "I just wanted to say thankful." The look Lauren gives her is creased, as if knowing what Bo had stuck in the back of her throat.
"It's no problem," she replies. The words ring honestly, but somehow still hollow in a paradoxical way. Bo nods, pulls herself further away, scared she'll say the words as she stands up, almost stumbling back away over the chair.
"I'll see you later then," she laughs. The ice isn't broken, the tension holds, and for a very scary moment, she wonders if Lauren really does know how she truly feels.
II. The Dal
The second time she feels the words, they're sitting at the bar. Lauren's doing shots and there's this big smile on her face. It's after-hours Lauren, the one Bo really likes to see after the long week she had. Her blonde hair was straightened, and her eyes were full of life. She almost seemed to glow, that is, more-so than her usual pulsing aura glow.
"This skinwalker comes in," Lauren's laughing, as she begun her story with expansive hand movements , "and I have no idea of course, I'm just sitting behind the microscope looking at a particularly rare string of a near-extinct fae DNA, minding my own business right?" Bo's smiling and nodding along. When the words became very technical, moving onto the affects of alcohol on the skinwalker's system, Bo's face clouded over, but her smiles widened.
She couldn't help it, Lauren just sounded so yummy.
"And then what happens?" she prompts further.
Lauren's laughing, her hand movements getting bigger as she starts making facial expressions to go along with the story. It's then, as Lauren's laughing again, her eyes dancing, and lips curved back in a large grin, Bo feels that sensation again.
It starts off as a tickle, deep inside, and at first she thinks it's because Lauren's hand is on her own, smiling as she's tossing her head back. There's blonde hair bouncing, and a tongue darting out to lick the top lip as she shakes her head again, "No," Lauren is laughing more, "he doesn't just walk to the Ash dressed like this, stumbling over his feet, you see?" Bo doesn't, but she nods and watches Lauren continue on.
There's more science, this time to explain the Ash, and there's shallow hand movements winding around each other to explain some power, and before Bo can understand what's happening, she's kissing Lauren and the last of the words are pushed into her mouth.
The feeling is swallowed back as she decides to use her tongue for other things instead, but when Lauren pulls away, frowning at Bo, the words come back. "What was that for?" Lauren asked her, breathless and red faced with a confused smile tugging at the corners of her lips. She's beautiful, Bo thought to herself, making it easier for her to blame the odd light, fuzzy feeling inside of her, on arousal.
"I..." she begins, and then the words are there again, tugging at her, acting like a cloud of fireflies inside of her that seemed to light her up from the inside out, and there she is, a beacon that Lauren surely should be able to read, see the signs. "I couldn't resist," she says instead, "you were acting so cute, and there were science words, and you're just so sexy." The lie was obvious to her, but Lauren just smiled, too flushed to notice.
"I'll be sure to talk science more, then."
"Oh yes, please do," Bo said, stretching the words to emphasis how much she wanted her to. The moment was gone, the words no longer there as she lent forward and snatched a kiss. "I promise I'll make it worth your wild if you do."
Lauren giggled, pulling away and blushing hard as she looked down at the ground and nervously shuffled, stepping away. "Perhaps we should..." her eyes flick to the door, where Kenzi steps through. "Never mind," she says shortly, smiling at Bo, "how are you?"
III. Bo's House
It had been innocent at first. There was a case, Bo needed help about fae related stuff, and Lauren had agreed to come over and help her with it in her spare time. There was no sexual intention on either part, but there never really was sexual intention, usually it just appeared and that's where they got stuck.
But it had been innocent. They'd sat down on the couch, huddled over the files. Lauren's fingers had traced under key words, her lips moving at rapid speed to talk. There were hand movements and some odd-jargon, greek (or latin, she wasn't quite sure) words mixed in, and Bo was just staring. "What?" Lauren asked, catching the glazed over eyes looking at her, "Oh," she laughed, bobbing her head in an expression of self-awareness. "Sorry," she murmured. Bo blinked.
"Sorry?" Bo asked, confused.
"I didn't mean to bore you with all the science, I just get so invested in it," she laughed. After that sentence, it took a few moments of reassurance from Bo, disagreement on Lauren's behalf, and a bottle of red wine split between the two of them before they loosened up and slowly pulled away the thicker files and stuck with more loose-leaf papers and ones that were paperclip with photos and anatomy drawing to understand the fae.
They stared at each other, and somehow, very quickly, another glass of red when down their throats, and then somehow, Lauren was straddling Bo and fingers were raking down bodies and skimming up the shirts. Files and papers were everywhere, forgotten, as they tasted the wine on the other's tongue, the bitter and the sweet as Lauren pulled her lips away from Bo's and ran it down her jaw, tasting everything.
There was a brief moment, eyes rolling back to the ceiling, and Bo's looking at some mystery - probably drunken made - stain on the ceiling. Lauren's hands are under her bra, her lips on her throat and Bo's moaning as she's ripping the buttons of Lauren's pink shirt off. It's a moment, it's brief, but the second is held in Bo's mind as the moment she understands something vital about herself.
She shakes her head, grabs Lauren and pulls her closer as the pink shirt runs down her arms and is thrown away. Their lips are hot, furious and frustrated. Lauren's mind pauses, her body moving instinctively as she realizes, senses Bo's sudden fear of something as her teeth scrape against the material of the singlet, Lauren wears beneath the pink shirt.
"Bo," she whispers, the word comes out as a moan and her eyes shut as she feels the first rip of the pants button. Her fingers fumble down, but instead of grabbing Bo's hands, stopping this, she grabs Bo's pants, ripping open the button and pulling down the fly. Looking down, she sees Bo pause in movement. The succubus looks up slowly, her eyes wide, "We don't have to continue," Lauren whispers to her, running a comforting hand down the side of Bo's face.
"I..." Lauren sees the odd glaze in her eyes, the way her dark brown eyes turn hooded and thought. She knows that look, know what it means. Lifting Bo's head up, she catches her lips, stopping the words, pretending she doesn't know what they mean.
Bo senses what Lauren did, understands and misinterprets the meaning for the worse. Lauren doesn't know, but she understands that she's done something. Within the hour, she's gone and Bo is staring at the scattered files around her, questioning herself.
IV. Lauren's Apartment
It's small, modest, filled with modest pieces of Art. Bo walked around as she waited for Lauren, her eyes going over the different mediums, trying to understand Lauren through them. Is she an artist? Bo wondered, does she attend art gallery openings? She's never really asked what Lauren does when she's not at work, or with her. Does she go shopping for groceries, or does the Ash take care of that?
The lock turns, Lauren doesn't see her and obviously she's forgotten that Bo was invited over. The woman dropped a mess of things to the floor, she turned around, back to the unseen Bo and slides the jacket off. Bo goes to make a noise, but then she heard the sound of Lauren's sigh, the shoes were kicked off her feet, bouncing off the wall. Lauren turned around, her pants slipping down her legs and dropped to the floor as she throws her shirt off.
Bo was very still and unmoving as she stared at Lauren's glorious body, from her arms to her legs and everything above, below and in-between. She must have been hidden in shadows, or out of Lauren's sight, or something because Lauren continued to strip infront of her, until she was very much so, naked. Bo should have said something then, or a few moments before then, instead she watched as Lauren walked around the corner of the hall and disappeared with Bo's eyes glued onto her body.
A small smile formed on Bo's lips as the shower starts to run. It'd be so easy to just join her, but no. Lauren was probably de-stressing and making her come, so hard that she almost passes out, in the shower, was probably not the best idea. No matter how tempting.
Instead she hid away and sat herself on Lauren's bed. Within a few moments, Lauren came walking in, wet, naked and shaking a towel through her hair as Bo grinned mischievously at her, "Hello Doctor," she purred. Lauren froze, the towel sitting on her hair, with her hand holding it in place.
"Bo," she said before her face went red, "Oh God," she muttered, grabbing the towel and wrapping it around her body. Bo pouted. "How long have you been here?" Lauren asked.
"Worried that I was in the lounge room as you stripped off in front of me?" she asked. Lauren went, if possible, even redder. The towel almost slipped from her body as she fumbled to gather herself.
Bo sat back, enjoying the slight discomfort of Lauren. If Lauren were to ask her to leave, she would, but Lauren's aura was asking her to do anything but leave, and her words had yet to say anything except, "why me?"
"Today's my lucky day," Bo grinned, biting her lip and allowing it to slip away as she stared at the tightly wrapped towel.
"Well I'm glad you're having a good day," Lauren grumbled.
"I could make your day lucky," Bo replied, looking up and holding Lauren's eye contact. The blush seeped down the woman's neck. Slowly, Bo stood up from the bed and walked over, lifting a finger and pushing up Lauren's jaw as her other hand was placed on the woman's hip. "Lauren," she smiled, "I-" there was a buzz and a low ring that snapped Bo away. Fumbling for her phone, she looked at who had the worst possible time in calling her, "Lochlyn."
V. A Warehouse
Lauren called her. Official fae business, at least, somewhat official. Really, she needed help with a patient and called Bo because she trusted her with secrecy. Bo came, helped and then the two of them were in a warehouse as Kenzi talked to the shifter, asking questions about his panther ability.
Lauren was worried, she was sick and there was something else happening, but any kind of "are you sure-" from Bo immediately caused Lauren to shut down, and defer a question to Bo.
Finally, having enough, she'd dragged Lauren away from the panther, leaving Kenzi with it, and pulled her to the opposite side of the warehouse. "What?" Lauren asked, completely confused about the situation and what was happening, "Dave-"
"Will be fine for a few moments," Bo finished for her. "Tell me what's wrong. What's happened." Lauren looks up, her eyes flicking to Bo's momentarily, ready to tell her everything. It's a pause, and Bo sees it before Lauren shakes her head and looks back to Dave the Panther. "Lauren," Bo urges, "Please, you can trust me."
She's desperate to know, to help, to protect Lauren from whatever is happening, because suddenly, Lauren wasn't talking to her, wasn't being right and she knew that something was wrong.
"To be completely self-centered for a second, can I ask, is it me?" she asked Lauren. There's a laugh, and it's bitter, but Lauren shakes her head.
"It's never you, Bo. Not really," the last is breathed out and Lauren had risen her arms to cross them. "It's complicated...fae...and I want to tell you, I've always wanted to tell you. But I can't, not yet, not until..." and her eyes are back on Dave, telling Bo that somehow Lochlyn or at the very least, the Light Fae, were the central problem for whatever was upsetting Lauren.
Bo reached out and touched her hand to Lauren's folded arms. She feels Lauren tense and slowly, as she stepped forward, she can see light flickering over the water that brims in her eyes. She doesn't know what to do, or say, or anything. She looks for Kenzi to help, and make wild gestures behind Lauren telling her what to do in this situation as Lauren's trying not to cry and is obviously having an internal monologue in her head.
But Kenzi's busy and Lauren's crying, and it's breaking her heart. It's a moment, a second. She can leave Lauren, watch her fix her face, take a breath and walk back over to Dave, or she can grab her, hold her in her arms and promise to make everything okay, promise to fix it, and kick the scumbags ass for making Lauren cry.
The moment's there, her hand is curled around Lauren's and she knows what to do. She yanks at it, pulls and then Lauren's in her arms and she's kissing her forehead, breathing in Lauren's scent.
"I'm sorry," Lauren whispered, her voice crackling. "I want to tell you, I want to tell you everything." Bo can hear it, the sound of anger burning inside of her, because Lauren was crying and she didn't know how to fix it. Her lips brushed against Lauren's forehead and she lifts Lauren's head up. "Bo, I-" And Bo cut her off with a kiss, a small, chaste kiss that promises to make it better, even though all Lauren wants to hear are the words behind it.
I. The Morning
It's the morning after, before everything went wrong, after everything went right. The moment is quiet, and Bo woke up first. She tucked a strand behind Lauren's ear, her emotions getting the better of her as she kissed Lauren's cheek and pulled away.
She sits up, careful to not wake Lauren as she climbs out of her bed and looks for clothes to change into, promising to herself that she'll fix the situation, save Lauren, have her in her arms and have her live permanently with her or something.
It didn't matter what happened next, not at that moment. All that mattered was that Lauren was safe, and that, at that point, before she finds out and talks to the Morrigan, to Bo, her and Lauren are good.
She hunts for her clothes, looking for everything, and instead finding the singlet she tore off Lauren, the singlet that was ripped down her body, underwear and...
There's a lot of clothes, more then she remembered being removed from either of them in the previous night, and possibly there is - because Bo can't remember in her haze, if there were clothes of hers last night scattered on the floor, or if it was the day after Laundry day, and her room was actually in a state of somewhat clean.
"Bo," Lauren whispers, half asleep as she rolls onto her back. Bo stands up, dropping her clothes as she leans over and kisses Lauren cheek.
"Go back to sleep," she tells her softly.
"Come back," Lauren loosely grabbed at her and then Bo's tugged back down on the bed with Lauren's arm wrapped around her waist tightly. "Sleep," Lauren murmured before snuggling closer, her lips on Bo's neck and legs tangled around Bo's. There's a moment, because with them, there's always a moment, where Bo looked up at the ceiling and briefly considered waiting until Lauren was back asleep and leaving her.
But she doesn't, she stays a little longer because she liked how warm Lauren was against her bare body, liked how she whispered odd things in her sleep and every now and again, gave a slight twitch and pulled an arm, a leg, or Bo's body, closer to her, as if she was scared that Bo wouldn't come back later.
And it's then, when Bo turned her head, seeing only a mass of blonde, but feeling Lauren's breath on her shoulder. It's as she rakes her eyes over the naked body, the curve of the spine, dip in the waist, the way her naked breasts rose and fell in a quick breath before Lauren let out a sigh and her fingers relaxed on Bo's stomach.
It's that pause that brings the fireflies back inside of Bo, and remind her that the once bitter words that reminded her of how everyone she loved seemed to leave her, weren't as bitter as she remembered. No, they were sweet on her lips.
And maybe it was because Lauren was asleep, maybe it was the way her legs were tangled around her own, and maybe it was because she could see flashes of Lauren in her eyes, flashes of laughter and sadness, bitter moments of betrayal and regret, and beautiful, beautiful moments of smiles, and moans, and pure ecstasy.
"I love you." She says it first. She's never the first to say it. But it felt right. It still feels right.