Hello to all my readers. This is my first ever Fanfic and I am very excited to get this story underway. I've never actually seen all the Teen Titans episodes (don't kill me), but I have read hundreds (yes, hundreds) of Fanfics about them, so I felt it time to pay my respects to the Titans and to the Fanfiction nation.

First of all, there are a couple of things I must point out.

1) My writing is very detail oriented, so for those who are looking for heavy dialogue, I apologize for the early going. I promise, however, that future chapters will be more dialogue driven.

2) This story as a whole is going to start off very tragic, with some graphic imagery, horror, and adult themes, but I promise that in the end things will work out. However, you have been warned.

3) I draw a lot from personal experience and personal demons, so some of what you may read really hits home for me, so if it seems that at times the story gets carried away with philosophical musings about the meaning of life and whatnot, I do apologize.

4) Sections that are flashback are noted at the beginning with the word Then. Transitions back to the present are noted with the word Now. Confused yet?

5) This is going to be BBxRae and RobxStar because that's the only way it should be. I may do something with Cy in later chapters.


Full Summary: Beast Boy is kidnapped and the culprits escape without a single trace. But when the Titans finally rescue him, he's not the same Beast Boy anymore. After suffering a tragic loss at the hands of his worst enemy, will Beast Boy ever recover? Can Raven help him overcome his grief before it's too late? BBxRae, RobxStar. Rated M for violence, alcohol use, horror, language, and suggestive themes/innuendo.

Disclaimer: Aw do I have to…sigh…I don't own the Teen Titans or any characters from the DC universe (duh).


Chapter 1 – Taken

"We have to hurry," Nightwing yelled back to the others. "We don't know what we're up against, but for Beast Boy, we have to keep moving!" Nightwing spoke those last words with stone -like resolve.

They had been running in the cold snow for what seemed like hours. As they approached their destination, they slowed, finally coming to a stop at the large doors of the compound. They stood in silence for a moment catching their breaths and staring intently at the entrance to the old rundown building. It looked like an old missile silo that had long since been abandoned, a relic of the Cold War Era. The Soviet Union had hundreds of these installations spread all throughout Russia, forgotten pawns in a decade-long struggle between two warring superpowers. The landscape surrounding the compound was underwhelming; lifeless tundra with snow and ice spread for as far as the eye could see. Siberia was a harsh place to die, and an even harsher place to live.

A cold wind stirred up and bit them down to the bone, causing them to shudder. One Titan stood apart from the rest, a look of bitter sadness upon her face. She didn't even bother to hide her feelings anymore. Ever since he had been kidnapped, she had been a nervous wreck. But she didn't care; she just wanted him back. They all did.

They had been looking for Beast Boy for weeks and this was their best and only lead.


Then…

Nightwing had been in the kitchen helping Starfire prepare lunch. As the years had passed he had grown taller and now stood at even height with Starfire. He had given up the "Boy Wonder" costume and changed his name to Nightwing, inspired by the great Kryptonian hero that Superman had once told him about. He was still the leader, but not of the Teen Titans. They had changed the name to the Titans now to signify their transition from young heroes to full-on "Justice League approved" heroes.

He was letting Starfire do most of the cooking, since she had been begging to cook something nice for all the Titans. She'd been carrying on incessantly about some "Tamaranean Banquet of Victoriousness" ever since they had beaten (or, more appropriately, trounced) the "Doctor of Light".

She had changed almost as little as Cyborg. She was older now, and it showed most in her demeanor. Her childlike naivety had long since vanished, a fact the secretly saddened Nightwing, as he had often found it irresistibly adorable. She'd also filled out nicely, her figure the envy of women the world over.

Nightwing was attentively watching Starfire to make sure the food she created didn't come to life, which happened surprisingly often when she cooked. And it didn't hurt that he got to be close to the woman he loved too. Ever since Tokyo, Nightwing and Starfire had been a real couple and made no attempt at hiding it. He'd long since gotten over his commitment issues and was content to enjoy the way things were between he and Star, with no excuses and no regrets.

Cyborg and Raven were sitting on the couch, as usual, Raven with book in hand and Cyborg staring mindlessly at the TV, watching some popular game show about money-filled briefcases and an annoying bald hypochondriac (A/N: Like you don't know what I'm talking about). Cyborg hadn't changed nearly as much as the rest of the Titans. His face was older, sharper, and he stood a few inches taller, but otherwise he remained exactly the same, at least on the outside. He had matured a little as he had gotten older, taking less of an interest in games, but there were still times when he would sit in front of the TV like a mindless drone. Cyborg looked less than enthused by the show, but he didn't bother to change the channel. He'd been surfing for 30 minutes and had finally given up when he made it around for the 3rd time.

Beast Boy, for a change of pace, was not watching the TV, but was making himself useful by preparing the table for dinner. Unlike Cyborg, he'd changed the most out of the Titans. He now stood as tall as Starfire and Nightwing, making Raven the shortest Titan, much to her chagrin. He finally grew into his body and left his scrawniness behind in exchange for strength and stature. But most of all, he'd matured mentally. He no longer made corny jokes – now his jokes were fewer and funnier. He'd taken a true interest in zoology, owing obviously to his morphing abilities, and now made sure that he was an expert on as many creatures as possible. He no longer watched TV nor did he play video games, except on rare occasions when Cyborg would whine about being bored or having no one to beat at Mega Maze Racers 3.

"Fork, knife, spoon, plate, napkin…yep, that's everything. Anything else I can do for you, Star?" Beast Boy walked over to the stove. "Or maybe there's something Nightwing can do for you?"

He smiled mischievously, shooting Nightwing a knowing smirk. Nightwing glared and rolled his eyes. Nevertheless, he turned his attention back to the oven in hopes that Beast Boy wouldn't notice his burning cheeks.

Starfire turned to Beast Boy and smiled. "Thank you friend Beast Boy, you have already been most helpful. I do not require any other assistance. And boyfriend Robin…I mean Nightwing…is already helping."

She said the last part sweetly and turned to give Nightwing a soft smile. He moved closer to her, and smiled sweetly back as they lost themselves in each others' eyes.

"Oh good lord…" Beast Boy hated it when they began to drool and stare longingly at each other. He decided it best to leave them to their cooking and ogling. He just hoped Nightwing was actually paying attention to her cooking. He didn't want to pay for this meal like he had the last time Starfire had cooked. He honestly thought he'd thrown up his own stomach.

He sauntered over to the couch and nonchalantly planted himself next to Raven. She acted as though she hadn't noticed and continued to read her book. He took the opportunity to scoot closer to her and stopped just short of their shoulders touching. At this point his nose caught the smell of jasmine and lavender and he couldn't help sighing contently. He leaned in closer to take in even more of her intoxicating scent. At this point he was really close to her. As in, way too close.

"My, my, aren't we living dangerously today." She didn't even glance up from her book as she spoke. Raven had also changed over the years. Ever since the Trigon incident, she had become more open with her emotions, though at times she was still very guarded. She let her hair grow out a bit longer so that now it was just past her shoulders. Like Starfire, she had filled out, though she found herself to be a bit curvier than her orange teammate. Even her skin was brighter and fuller, a soft mix of pale grey and pink. All these changes did not go unnoticed by Beast Boy, who had recently found himself drawn to her presence.

"Aw, Rae, you don't have to get all offended and stuff just 'cause I sat next to you" said Beast Boy. He leaned over slightly as he said this.

"You're touching me" she said, her voice offering the threat of danger. His face was mere inches from hers, and his chest was softly pressed against her shoulder.

He waggled his eyebrows and got as close as he could to her ear. "Don't act like you don't like it," he whispered, his warm breath causing a ripple to work its way up her spine.

She began to blush profusely, and she buried her face deeper in her book so that he couldn't see her. "Go away, Beast Boy," she deadpanned.

He smiled triumphantly. He knew exactly how to push her buttons. He had to be careful though; he didn't want to push her boundaries and hurt her feelings. He only meant to have a little fun.

He eased up on the seductiveness and tried a more playful approach. "Come on Rae, you know you can't resist me. And you definitely can't resist 'The Face'." Immediately he changed into a small green kitten and tilted his head slightly as he stared at her with his big cuddly eyes.

She looked down at him from her book, and rolled her eyes, although she couldn't help giving him a slight smile. "What if I don't like cats?" she quipped, all the while trying to stay focused on her reading.

He changed back into himself and paused in thought. Then he smiled a confident smile, happy once again with his quick thinking. He'd been doing that a lot lately, and to be honest he was actually a little proud of himself. Well, if you don't like cats…

He changed into a small green beagle puppy (A/N: Cutest. Puppy. Ever.) and gave her the puppy version of "The Face."

At this she smiled and gave a slight laugh. "I've got to admit you really are persistent. It's too bad your jokes still suck."

Changing back, he smirked at her, closing his eyes and raising one finger in the air, as if to quote from a book. "Ah, yes, but you have to admit that some of my newer jokes are funny."

"Yes, funny, but still stupid," she quipped.

"But still funny," he joked back, a playful grin across his face.

"Oh my god. You two are the worst at flirting. Ever. Would you just get a room already?" Cyborg had had enough. His face was in his hand and he was shaking his head.

"We. Are. Not. Flirting," they both yelled, although the fact that they said it completely in sync didn't help their argument. They quickly looked at each other and then looked away to hide their heated faces.

Cyborg smirked at them knowingly. "Obviously not," he chuckled.

Just then their little song and dance was interrupted by the cheerful sound of Starfire's voice. "Friends," she began, "please gather at the table for the evening consumption of mass quantities" (A/N: Coneheads, LOL).

Starfire glided over to the table with two very large platters of food, one filled with green bean casserole, Nightwing's personal favorite, and the other with creamed mashed potatoes, a favorite of Cyborg. She placed them on the table and zoomed back to the oven top, returning shortly with the meat-free gravy for the potatoes and some black-eyed peas, which Beast Boy loved. Nightwing followed her with pot of fresh cheddar macaroni, one of Starfire's favorites. He placed this at the center of the table with the rest of the food, along with a freshly-baked, made from scratch cherry pie, which Raven thoroughly enjoyed.

They all sat down at the table, and Raven couldn't help but notice something odd. "Starfire, each one of these dishes is someone's favorite dish," she said. "Did you do that on purpose?" She cocked an eyebrow as she said this and looked to the other Titans, who had now just noticed this and looked to Starfire for clarification.

Starfire smiled cheerfully. "That is correct, friend Raven. The meal is made of many dishes, each of which is special to one of us. The meal symbolizes how we fight in battle. Each Titan has his or her own particular skills that they bring to the fight. Together we make the perfect team, and thus together these dishes make the perfect meal." She beamed very brightly as she said this, and was even more pleased to see all the other Titans smile back at her, including Raven.


Now…

They all knew he was alive, they knew it; he was too stubborn to die, and his overwhelming confidence and positive attitude were enough to overcome any odds. But deep down, in the darkest places of their minds, they also knew that when they did find him, things would be different. Just the way he had disappeared, the way it was so flawlessly planned, so perfectly executed – that was what scared them the most. Whoever had kidnapped Beast Boy knew how to beat the Tower's defenses; they knew how to catch the Titans off guard; how to beat them and draw them away one by one so they could get Beast Boy all by himself and overwhelm him. And it was entirely possible that they knew how to inflict the worst of pain.

Nightwing could sense the uneasiness in their minds. He felt it in his own, a nagging thought of panic and fear. But he was the leader of the Titans, and a Titan was in danger. So he had to be strong, had to be the face of focus. Still, he could feel their pain, and felt his own resolve fading as he looked upon their worried faces. Even Raven, whose expression often gave no hint of emotion, seemed a little paler than usual, and she sported an obvious frown. Suddenly he broke character and spoke not as their leader, but as their friend.

"Look, I'm scared too. I know this is hard for everyone. We're all worried for Beast Boy. But we have to be strong. He needs us to be strong. He's counting on us to save him, to free him, and we can't let him down. He's…he's a part of this team, and more importantly, he's a part of our family…"

He trailed off. A sudden strain of emotion had grabbed his throat and wouldn't let go. He looked away from the remaining Titans and clenched his fists, anger and guilt overpowering him.

"This is all my fault. I'm the leader of the Titans. You're all my responsibility. Beast Boy was my responsibility and I let him down…" He trailed off again, silenced by the cold wind and the bitterness in his heart.

"No."

He turned around to see Raven walking up to him. She had a sad look upon her face, but at the same time she seemed confident.

"This is not your fault. It's no one's fault. And Beast Boy is strong – he can handle more than you think. He's going to make."

She paused, strangely overcome with emotion, and drew in a ragged breath. She looked down sadly as she spoke. "I know he's alive," she continued, almost in a whisper. "I can feel it and I know you can feel it too. Beast Boy wouldn't want us to blame ourselves for this – he'd want us stay strong and not focus on ourselves but rather on the team, so that we could work together to save him."

Nightwing's expression softened at this and he smiled at Raven. "Hmm, I guess I never thought of you as the leader type, but now I think you're giving me some competition," he chuckled, and Raven couldn't help but smile as well.

At just like that he was focused again. He nodded to the rest of the Titans and with Cyborg's help they opened the two massive doors to the missile silo. It was dark inside, but as their eyes adjusted they could see a single overhead lamp in front of a rusted door at the end of the entrance.

They made their way cautiously to the door and pried it open. All hopes of secrecy were lost as the door screamed in protest at being opened, but at this point none of them cared about surprising their enemy. A few feet in from the door there was a single stairway that seemed to go down for miles into the dark depths of the base. Their footsteps echoed in the narrow tunnel as they ventured downward into the darkness, and Raven couldn't help remembering the utter chaos of the ambush the day that Beast Boy was kidnapped.


Then…

They eagerly dug into their meal. Everything was wonderful, which surprised everyone, including Starfire, who half expected the food to be inedible. Nightwing smiled and wrapped his arm around her.

"This is great Star," he said. "Thanks for doing this for us."

She beamed brightly, and was about to offer a sincere "I welcome you" when she was unceremoniously cut off by the blare of the claxon and a computerized voice screaming "Intruder Alert!"

Immediately the Titans sprang to action, the meal completely forgotten. Nightwing ran over to the main console and pulled up the security cameras on the main screen.

"Titans Trouble," he said. "We've got an intruder in the garage…and an intruder in the med bay…and an intruder in the workout room…and let's not forget the intruder in security vault."

There were 4 images up on the main screen, and in each room could be seen a dark figure lurking around in the shadows. The lights were normally kept off when the rooms were not used, and before Nightwing could turn them on, the main power was cut and the Tower went dark, save for the light streaming in from the setting sun.

None of the Titans panicked, but instead walked over towards the window and stood in the sunlight, waiting calmly for the backup generator to kick in. But it never did. After a few minutes they realized that there would be no secondary power – they would have to fight in the dark.

At this point Nightwing was clearly frustrated. He gathered himself and spoke up. "Okay," he began, "it looks like we're going to have to do this the hard way. Cyborg, you check the garage. Raven, the med bay. Star, the workout room. And I'll head to the security vault. Beast Boy you stay here and guard the common room. This will be our rallying point. Everybody stay sharp and make sure you keep the lines of communication open."

There was a round of nods and then they all split up and headed for their various assignments. All save for Beast Boy, who remained in the common room. Alone.

Starfire was the first Titan to reach her destination, and after finding nothing she quickly opened her communicator.

"Friends, there seems to be no one in the room of working out," she said, a rather confused look on her face. "I do not understand."

"Yeah, I got nothing in the garage," said Cyborg. "I've scanned the walls and the floor. There isn't even a trace of an intruder."

"I've looked all over the med bay and I can't sense anyone or anything out of place," added Raven.

Nightwing was the last to chime in, and the frustration in his voice was undeniable. "The security vault is safe but the power generators look like they've been smashed by a giant hammer," he said. "Cyborg, do you think you could get down here and fix these?"

"Yo, I'm on it," said Cyborg into his communicator, and he headed out of the garage for the vault room.

There was a pause before Raven spoke up again, this time with much more concern in her voice.

"Nightwing, I can sense a very large presence in the Tower. It seems to be located…in the common room."

As soon as she said this, there was the distant sound of an explosion. Immediately all the Titans stopped what they were doing and began to running for the common room. Cyborg attempted to head to the common room, but Nightwing insisted that they needed the power back if they were going to even have a chance of gaining the upper hand.

Raven attempted to conjure up her teleportation circle, but just as she was phasing into the darkness, she felt a presence in the room that she hadn't first detected. She stopped midway through the transition and returned to the med bay. How could someone hide from her empathic senses? Her communicator blipped and she picked it up to see a very dazed Beast Boy.

"Hey Dudes, there's an intruder in the common room and the guy friggin' hit me with a flash-bang. I can't see or hear or smell him, but I can still feel him here. I'm gonna try and stall but I could really use some backup."

She knew that she had to hurry. She looked around in the dark and spotted a fleeting shadow as it headed for the med bay doors. Beast Boy would have to wait; she had her own villain to deal with. Plus, Beast Boy was capable of handling himself, or so she thought.

"Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos."

She concentrated on the med bay doors. She used her dark energy to weld the doors shut, hoping to keep the intruder from escaping. As she approached the doors, she could just make out the shadow of a tall, slender woman. But as she got closer, the woman began to get skinnier and taller, almost as if she was stretching herself out like gum. Before she could stop the intruder, the woman slipped effortlessly through the crack under the doors and escaped into the hallway.

Raven thought about following the intruder, but something told her to just let her go. She was able to pick up on Beast Boys emotions and immediately she was overcome with fear and panic. And then there was nothing. Beast Boy was gone and she couldn't sense him anymore.


Beast Boy heard all of their responses on his communicator with growing confusion and concern. Just then the main doors slid open and Beast Boy could see a small metal cylinder roll out of the shadows and down the steps to his feet.

Beast Boy had the best instincts out of all the Titans and without thought jumped back from the can. Just as he had expected, the can exploded, but what he thought was a bomb was actually a flash-bang. The flash blinded him and he fell to the ground in utter disarray. His ears were ringing and the smell of fumes invaded his nose, making his already burning eyes water.

He'd lost all of his senses, and he knew immediately that he was in deep trouble. He stumbled to his feet and adopted a fighting stance. Though they had taken away his ability to see or hear or smell, they hadn't taken away his most valuable sense: his sixth sense. He could feel someone in the room with him. He could sense the presence of a large adversary over in the corner of the common room near the doors. Beast Boy knew that his only chance was to buy time until his other senses came back or until the other Titans came to help.

He moved behind the couch and crouched down, pulling out his communicator. He opened up the main channel and spoke in a very low voice so as not to tip off the intruder.

"Hey Dudes, there's an intruder in the common room and the guy friggin' hit me with a flash-bang. I can't see or hear or smell him, but I can still feel him here. I'm gonna try and stall but I could really use some backup."

He didn't even wait for a response (which he wouldn't have been able to hear anyway). Instead he closed the communicator and returned it to his belt. As he did, he had his other hand on the couch and was surprised to feel it lift away from him. Without warning a huge fist slammed right into his chest, completely knocking the wind out of him as he crashed against the TV. He fell to his knees, clenching his chest for air, but before he could take a single breath, he felt a wet rag being pressed roughly against his mouth and nose. He couldn't smell anything but felt the fumes of the wet substance leaking into his lungs. He suddenly felt very tired, and though he struggled to free himself, he soon ran out of energy, slipping slowly into darkness and silence.


As always, reviews are most welcome. Chapter 2 to follow shortly. Until next time, this Lavender and Jade, signing off!