\SHOTS OF THE WHITEHOUSE AT NIGHT AND THE LINCOLN MEMORIAL FLASH ACROSS THE SCREEN WHILE THE THEME SONG PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND...\
Sophie was fatigued and tired at the same time. "READ ME A STORY!" She demanded from Chef Victor. "No." Chef Victor replied. "Cory, Read your sister a story."
"DANG!" shouted cory, visibly annoyed and mad. "Dad, do I have to? All those stories...they're kid stuff! " He leaned on the counter all smooth like. "Can't she read on her own yet?"
"No, Cory." Chef Victor started, doing a double take followed by a goofy face as he looked down at what he accidentally did. He had written 'miss ur 4 am calls' on the cake he was making.
"What's WROOONG, Chef Victor?" Sophie asked. The chef looked over at her quickly, then out of comedic instinct threw his face into the cake to hide the evidence. The audience roars up a laughing storm.
Cory's eyes opened wide and he made a funny, incredulous face. "DAAAANG, daddy! Guess you're really...PUTTING YOURSELF INTO YOUR WORK!" THE THEME SONG PLAYS...
Sophie's eyes were huge and kawaii while Cory finished the story of a puppy with one leg figuring out that psychological war trauma will go away if you fall in love.
"BOOOORING" said cory after finishing the story. "Sophie, don't you ever read any books with, ya know, like zombies or basketball or somethin'?"
Sophie pouted. "Of course not, those are for stupid people like you! Everyone likes fluffy drumbone the doggie!" She pointed at the book as Newt came in. "WOOOHOOHOOOOAHHHHH! IS THAT FLUFFY DRUMBONE THE DOGGIE? THAT'S LIKE, MY FAVORITE STORY!" The audience laughs.
"Newt! Will you PLEASE tell Sophie that stories about puppies and love are for weenies? And NOT...for future rock stars?" Cory demanded.
Newt took one look at Fluffy Drumbone the doggie. Then at Cory. Then at the doggie. "I can't, man...I can't..."
"SEE?" Sophie pointed out. " I told you neener neener neener " Sophie brattily stuck her tongue out.
"I'LL KILL YOU! Cory screamed as he chased Sophie around the White House. Whimsical music plays and the audience roars with laughter! Finally, Sophie makes Cory trip over a rug and fall down right in front of...THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES! "Hey there you silly kids, you!" the president said with a smile even though on the inside he was crying a million tears at he and chef victor's distant relationship. "What are you kids up to?" he asked.
"DADDY, HE SAID HE WAS GONNA KILL ME!" Sophie screamed as she clung to her father's muscular justice-filled kneecap.
The president looked at cory. "Is that true, Cory?" he asked. "UH. NO SIR. SEE WHAT HAD HAPPENED SIR WAS...I ACTUALLY SAID 'I'LL...FILL YOU...you know like i'll FILL YOU IN ON WHAT HAPPENS TO FLUFFY DRUMBONE THE DOGGIE IF YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN.'" The audience laughs.
Sophie looks up at her father, eyes filled with worry.
Newt comes in a bit late on the scene. "HAHA, WHAT'D I MISS...?" The audience laughs again.
Cory looked at Newt with angry eyes and a bald head. "Newt, I was just explaining to the president how his daughter is in no danger at all!"
"I KNOW WHAT I SAID NEWT NOW SHUT IT OR YOUR FINGERS WILL NEVER BE CAPABLE OF PLAYING GUITAR AGAIN" cory yelled angrily and put his hands over Newt's mouth.
Newt sniffed Cory's hand. "...Watermelon?" Newt questioned, as everyone in the room turned to look at him in confusion and some disgust.
\SHOTS OF THE EIFFEL TOWER, AND THE AMERICAN FLAG...\
"Corrrry, you look so down today. In Bahavia, we would call you a Sad Yak." Mena told him as they sat in the school courtyard as usual for teenagers.
"Yeah Meena...I guess I'm just a little frustrated because I'm always being forced to do things with SOOOOOPHIEEE" Cory said while making an angry gesture that was reminiscent of jazz hands. "I don't even get paid for it!"
"Well why don't you just ask the big chief?" Newt asked. Everyone looked over at him because he wasn't being stupid enough. "...Cause that'd be awwweessoooomeeeee." He said while rocking his head back and forth in a turtle-like motion.
"Newt, that's a terrible idea!" Cory said. "Wait, I know...why don't I just ASK THE BIG CHIEF..." he pondered.
"Well I don't know Corrry...Don't you think that ..THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES...is a little too busy to worry about a babysitter?" Mena stated. Newt pulled out Fluffy Drumbone the dog out from his backpack to read, because it was the only thing he was ever taught how to read.
"Meena, Meena, Meena!" Cory said in an annoying oh-yeah-I'm-smooth-you-don't-know-anything-but-don't-worry-babe-i-got-this kind of way. "When will you learn that I am," Cory snapped his pudgy fingers. "The KING of business?"
Newt continued to read, as if important to the story. Meena rolled her eyes because she was secretly in love with Cory.
"Newt, will you put that thing away?" Cory snapped. "I am TRYING to come up with a scheme!"
Newt looked up dopily. "Oh, this? It's just Fluffy Drumbone..."
"THE MAN SAID NOW..." Mena demanded.
"Ok. So I need something that will either help me get out of PRECIOUS PUPPY TIME with sophie, or make some money from it!" Cory said enthusiastically while having a crush on Meena.
"I don't know HOW you would make money from it..." Mena talked to herself. Newt felt like crying. Fluffy Drumbone had been a part of his life since he was a young lad. The fact that his best friends in the entire world couldn't enjoy it with him made him feel as if he couldn't be friends with them anymore. His blog would certainly hear about this, along with a gif representing his sorrows.
"You guys are useless," Cory said. "Oh, I know! WHAT ABOUT...A ROBOT TIGER BABYSITTER!...maybe..." Just then, Cory smelled a smelly smell that smelled...smelly. "Why, hello my classmates!...and helloooooo Meena" Stickler said as he slicked his hair back even though it was already slicked back as much as it could be.
In unison as if they've practiced, everyone yells " STICKLER! " Newt hurridley tries to hide his book.
"You guys wanna see my new CIA gadget?" Stickler asked, looking at Meena with a glob of drool hanging down from his mouth because he had a crush on her.
"No. In Bahavia, you would be a gross yak!" Mena told him.
"A gross yak...with POWER!" Stickler replied.
"haha, that's what my mom always says to me!" Newt replied. The audience gives a pity laugh.
"I bet she does," said Stickler. The audience laughs knowingly. "Don't you have anything better to do, Stickler?" asked Cory. "We don't wanna see your stupid...what is THAT" Cory asked, seeing Stickler's top-secret-CIA-thingamajig. "IT'S WHAT I WAS GONNA SHOW YOU BEFORE YOU REMINDED ME THAT I HAD SOMETHING BETTER TO DO HAHAHAHA LATER LOSERS" Stickler said as he ran away. "DANG!" said Cory.
"Now we will neverrr know Stickler's cool CIA gadget!" Mena pouted frustratingly. Newt was on his smart phone posting on his tumblr about what happened.
"AND WHOSE FAULT IS THAT, MISS STICKLER LOOOOVES ME BUT I WON'T USE THAT TO MY ADVANTAGE?" Cory yelled. Cory smacked Newt because Newt is stupid.
Newt knows why he was slapped, so he put his phone back into his pocket. "One day I'll have revenge. " he whispers softly. "WHY IS THAT SUCH A BAD THING? MAYBE I HAVE A CRUSH ON...SOMEONE ELSE...!" Mena yelled back.
Cory raised his eyebrows. "Like who, Meena? Who else could you have a crush on?..." Before Meena could open her mouth, a BEAUTIFUL GIRL WALKED IN! She had short auburn hair that shined like the sun. She was wearing ripped purple tights under her faded denim shorts. She was wearing a band tee (The Ramones) and lots of bracelets. She had a bow in her hair and she looked like she didn't care what anyone thought about her. And she was soooo beautiful, Cory and Newt's jaws both dropped!
"WHO'S THAT..." Newt asked, starry eyed.
"I don't know, but I wanna find out you know what I'm sayin'" Cory answered.
Mena was pissed off like a yak who's mate was taken away by a prettier yak.
The girl walked up to the group of friends. "Hi! I'm Jones." she said. Her name wasn't really Jones, but her real name was Madison and Madison was a stupid girly name so she went by Jones instead! "I'm new here. Can any of you show me where my classes are?...by the way, cool shirt!" she said looking at Newt. Cory was so jealous that all he could think was how he was glad he wasn't in the house right now cause he would definitely BREAK SOMETHING!
Newt blushed because he was already in love. "...AWWWEEESOOOMEEE..." Was all that emerged from his mouth.
Jones giggled, even though she didn't usually giggle because she wasn't a girly girl. "So, do you play guitar, then?" she asked.
"...AWEEESOOOOMEEE..." Newt replied Newtily.
Jones laughed again. Cory was jealous that someone who was so stupid could get a girl like that! "Hey, I can show you to your classes!" Cory said, trying to win her over. "Oh, thanks," she said, "but I was really hoping...Newt could help me..." Cory was heartbroken, and it showed.
As they left, Cory sighed. He couldn't believe it. He watched Jones walk away longingly like the was the last spoonful of nutella in the whole wide world.
Ducky Waddles says Mena scooched closer next to him. "Hey...We can think of ways to babysit Sophie for money...if you know what I mean..." Mena tiptoed her fingers along his crisco arm, then slowly whispered, "In Bahavia, we call it...mating..."
"Meena, we don't have time to engage in your weird, bahavian games! Did you see that girl go off with Newt like he was...well...not Newt?" Cory asked.
Mena pouted. "No. All I see is a friend who isn't himself anymore...!" She stood. " I QUIT THE BAND!" Mena started walking off.
"Meena? MEEEEEENNNNAAAAA!" Cory yelled. Then he remembered that she wasn't as pretty and cool as Jones so went back to thinking about her. "Hmmm," thought Cory. "I wonder if anyone ELSE around here can sing..." And at that, Cory immediately went to find Newt and Jones.
Newt forgot what he was supposed to be doing because he is dumb. So he took out Fluffy Drumbone the Doggie book and was showing it off to Jones.
"What's this?" Jones asked.
"haha, an awesome book..." Newt said, then asked... "...Could you read it to me...? ...I never learned how... I was always too busy being awesome..." The crowd awws.
Jones smiled. "Sure!" she exclaimed. While she was reading the book to Newt, Cory burst in the room. "Newt!" he yelled. "Are you making this...fantastical girl read your stupid dog book!" Cory then saw that Jones had tears in her eyes. "What's wrong, Jones? Do you need a shoulder to cry on cause-" "THIS BOOK...REMINDS ME OF MY PET TADPOLE...I NEED...I NEED A MINUTE. DON'T FOLLOW ME!" She ran out of the room with the book, crying. "Look what you did!" yelled Cory.
"NO, LOOK WHAT YOU DID, YOU FAT PIECE OF CHOCOLATE!" Newt started to let out the anger he had been building up for several years now.
"I didn't do nothin'! IT WAS YOUR STUPID DOG BOOK, MAN! I'm gonna go find her." Cory said.
"NO...I AM..." Newt pushed him out of the way and ran after his woman.
"no ME!" cory shouted. The two of them approached the music room. They heard the most beautiful sound in creation. A piano played along with an angelic voice that sounded like Aretha Franklin, Hayley Williams, and Beyonce combined. "I told you you'd would be a frog someday but, then the tide came and took you away..." the voice sang. Newt and Cory stared at each other. Could it be...her?
"Wh-who's there!" Jones screamed. "GUYS! I told you NOT to FOLLOW me!"