Title – Kissing You And Waiting For Reciprocation
Author – Moonbeam
Rating – PG-13
Warnings –Angst, death, fighting.
Word Count –4885
Summary – This is not a happy story, five times Stiles kissed Derek and the only time he was kissed by Derek.
Disclaimer – If I owned this show there would be more of it, lots lots more of it.
Author's Notes – This was inspired by the Search For A Cure Thing – the first part happens before the show, and it was all inspired when Scott said Derek's name and Stiles said 'saying that name, are you trying to hurt me?' and well I just had a shipper moment.
Kissing You And Waiting For Reciprocation
1 – First Kiss
"You can do this, you can do this." Stiles chanted to himself as he stood at the door.
Derek threw the door open and glared at him. "What do you want?"
Okay, it is possible for Derek to be more terrifying than he already was, Stiles took a deep breath.
"So I waited last time and it came to nothing because you have to try and do things for yourself." Stiles said before pulling Derek close and sealing his lips over the alpha's.
Derek pulled him in close and pressed a hand to his lower back, his head tilted he licked along Stiles' bottom lip until he opened for him. Stiles moaned into his mouth as he slid his tongue in to meet Derek. Stiles buried his hand in Derek's hair, pulling him closer his entire body pressed tightly into Derek.
Stiles was so relieved, he figured this would all end with him thrown from the house probably with at least one broken bone but the last person he'd been in whatever with had never even looked at him twice so if he was going to have a crush on Derek he was going to do something about it.
Derek pulled away from him slowly, his lips clinging to draw the kiss out just a little longer.
Derek pushed Stiles away from him and pulled his hands back and shoved them in his pockets.
"Never come here again, I will never kiss you again, do not try to kiss me. Nothing is ever going to happen Stiles." Derek said slamming the door in his face.
Stiles stared at the door; he let his head fall forward hitting the wood in front of him. "Shit!" He said. "You don't kiss like that if you don't want a person."
Nothing. Stiles turned from the door and went to his car. He might have got his first kiss but his chest felt hollow and painful. He climbed into the car and drove away, he wouldn't go near Derek again, and that was okay - after all Scott had refused to join his pack so it would all be okay.
2 – Threats
"Where are the werewolves running tonight?" The older man said pressing Stiles back into the wall.
"I don't know." Stiles said again.
"Your best friend is a wolf; I know he swore allegiance to that mutt Hale. Where are they running?"
"I am not involved." Stiles said pushing against the older, larger, stronger man who had pulled him into the alley when he was going to pick up dinner for himself and his dad.
"You are involved; you have been seen with Hale, and his two betas. And your friend Scott, we know you are involved. You were seen going to the Hale house recently."
"I was involved last year, when Derek became the alpha I stopped being involved. Scott and I do not discuss werewolf things." They hadn't since Scott decided to join Derek's pack because there were new hunters in town who didn't seem to care what the werewolf did so long as they could be killed. Stiles hadn't been able to go back after his disastrous first kiss and Derek had made it obvious that he wasn't wanted.
"If you are lying to us, we will come back for you." The man said slamming Stiles into the wall again before both men moved off.
Stiles stood there for a little longer, he didn't get involved with the pack, he helped Scott but he stayed away from the pack because Derek didn't want him and every time Stiles saw him he felt the hot flush of embarrassment and rejection. Didn't seem to matter though, he was going to be dragged in anyway.
It was two weeks later, Stiles was on his way into the library when a large arm circled his neck and he was yanked behind the building to another alleyway, shoved against another wall and held there by the same man.
"Tell us about Hale." He demanded.
"You do know my father is the sheriff right?" Stiles started.
"Tell." Stiles head bounced off the wall behind him. "Me about Hale." Another slam if they kept going he was going to get a concussion.
"I don't know anything."
"Before Argent left he said you were useful, don't be useless Stiles or my friend here will be the one asking questions." Stiles let his eyes flick to the other man, bigger, stronger, and definitely meaner looking.
"What do you want to know?" Stiles sighed.
"How do we get into his house?"
"I don't know," Stiles said. "I haven't been since he rebuilt it."
Stiles' head bounced off the wall behind him.
"What the hell do you think you are doing?" Came a voice from the corner of the building that made Stiles' stomach clench.
"Hale. So he is part of your pack."
Derek's eyes barely flittered over Stiles. "No, he is the friend of one of my pack."
"Then piss off Hale."
"If you want to know about Hale," Stiles gasped out. "He's right there and I don't know anything."
"He really doesn't. I don't want him anywhere near my pack."
The man released Stiles who didn't even bother turning back just walked away and into the library finding a quiet place to sit down on the floor and collapse. He was sick of being threatened and he wasn't even being useful. Derek didn't want him anywhere near the pack and Scott was part of the pack so he was just trying to get over it, he just wanted to be left alone if he couldn't be involved. It had been over a month of him at home alone most of the time, only getting to hang out with Scott at school, because the pack was training and if the pack wasn't training he was secretly skyping with Allison.
Stiles' heartbeat was back to normal and his hands had stopped shaking when a heavy body settled down next to him.
Stiles turned his head to look at Derek.
"How many times have they done that?"
"Twice, they want to know about the pack."
"What did you tell them?"
"Nothing, I don't know anything."
"I'm fine thanks for asking." Stiles stood up and turned on Derek.
"I know you're fine. You can handle a lot worse than being shoved into a wall." Derek stood as well. "If they harass you again call me."
"If I call you they are going to think I am part of your pack."
"They already do." Derek pointed out.
"Fuck, give me your number." Stiles put the number in his phone. "I am leaving; I'm not going to get any research done now."
"Stiles." Stiles turned back to look at Derek. "Are you okay?"
Stiles knew it is a bad idea, knew it is stupid but the next thing he is aware of is the feeling of Derek pressed against him and his lips pressed against Stiles' so obviously he had decided to kiss Derek again. Weirdest part of it all being the fact that Derek's tongue is in Stiles' mouth and he is kissing him back. Derek pulled away and looked at Stiles like he was insane.
"Sorry, I'm fine. Goodbye." Stiles said before Derek could reject him again.
Stiles turned and walked out of the library.
The hunters waited another month before they yanked Stiles into another alley to threaten and mildly physically assault him.
3 – Reassured
Scott had an arrow through his shoulder and there were three hunters staring him down. Derek was next to him, completely transformed and terrifying. Scott yanked the arrow out of his shoulder and stood up. When they were standing in front of the tree together two more hunters suddenly appeared behind the three already there.
Scott transformed, he could feel the hole in his shoulder knitting but he wasn't healed and this fight would end up falling mainly to Derek…again.
One of the new hunters moved forward, standing in front of the rest of them. "Hale, so nice to see you again. That little human of yours keeps telling me he knows nothing about your pack but I keep seeing him at your house."
"He is not a part of this." Derek said.
"Stiles?" Scott asked, Derek turned and glared at him.
"Yes, that's his name isn't it?" The man in front of him said.
"He is not a part of this." Derek said letting the full force of his alpha voice wash over the man in front of him.
"So you keep telling me Hale, and yet he is always involved somehow. He was there last week when your other little beta the boy, he is very annoying, was attacked." The man watched Derek for a moment. "Oh you didn't know he was there. They lied to you, he's the only reason Jackson got away. He is a smart one."
"Stiles is a human, you have no reason to hunt him." Derek said.
"The only reason I could ever need is the fact he is helping you."
"The end fight is coming Derek and we are going to rip your pack to shreds. We are going to destroy every wolf that is allied with you, and if that little deluded human is standing between me and you I will kill him too."
Derek moved forward, smacking the man in front of him across the face making him collapse to the ground after flying off his feet.
The fight was on, Scott and Derek fought hard and Scott ended up with three more arrow wounds as well as a broken ankle and a gash down his leg that was struggling to reknit.
Derek was covered in blood and Scott didn't know if it was his or the hunters all of whom were now limping away from them. The leader, the man who had spoken to them – had threatened Stiles, being carried by the other men. Derek had not held back, there were a number of broken bones, cuts, claw marks, and knife wounds that the hunters would need to deal with before they came back; and they would come back. Derek had been vicious and lethal and all because someone had threatened Stiles. Scott had never claimed to be the smartest man around but he knew his friend liked Derek, he just hadn't realised that his best friend had gotten under the alpha's skin as well.
They watched the hunters until they could not see them or hear them and then Derek slung and arm under Scott's and across his back to help Scott stumble back to the house.
It took them over half an hour to walk the distance it took them two minutes to run earlier in the evening and when they got back to the house the door was thrown open the moment they stepped foot on the porch. Stiles rushed from the house and grabbed Scott's other arm getting them inside before turning and locking the door behind them.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Derek growled grabbing Stiles' upper arm as soon as Scott was dropped on the couch.
"That hunter guy came and pushed me into an alley again, asked me more questions about you but something they said about having a couple of the wolves pinned down. I knew it wasn't Jackson because he answered his phone and Lydia was with me before I was taken."
"Why were you with Jackson the last time they attacked, why were you with Lydia tonight?"
"Jackson was attacked after practice and I was there so I went and helped. I figured he would have told you. Lydia and I ran into each other when I was getting ice cream just before they grabbed me. The ice cream melted by the way."
"Umm, as much as I am all for you doing whatever it is the two of you are doing I think I might need some medical assistance." Scott interrupted from the couch.
"Yeah," Stiles grabbed the first aid kit from the table behind Derek and opened it to start working on Scott. "We'll need to take your clothes off." Derek growled. "Oh don't be painful Derek I am here, I'm fixing Scott up and then you and you can yell at me after."
Scott smirked as he pulled his pants and top off letting Stiles get to his wounds. Stiles cleaned the cut and scrapes, checked the arrow wounds to make sure there were no splinters and then checked his ankle.
"I don't know how to reset an ankle." Stiles said looking up at Scott.
"I do," Derek said crowding Stiles out of the way before he ran his hands along Scott's ankle and pressed on different spots until he was satisfied. Scott was transformed when Derek looked back up, but he hadn't made a noise at the pain.
"Scott, go and have a shower and I'll sort the cut on your leg when it's all cleaned out." Stiles ordered.
Scott nodded and hobbled off, waving Stiles away when he tried to help.
"Where are you hurt?" Stiles said turning on Derek.
"I'm fine. Can we get to that part where I yell at you now?"
"You can yell at me so long as you let me check your shoulder."
Derek growled but pulled his shirt over his head. Stiles gasped, the entire shoulder was violent blue there were a number of gashes, even more than it looked like there were through the shirt. There was one long cut running almost the entire way down to his nipple.
Stiles grabbed the disinfectant and started working on cleaning out the wounds. Derek hissed and started talking. "You should stay away from all of us. They intend to kill us all. They are going to try and kill you too if you are here."
"They think I am here even if I am not so I am over it. I will be here at the next training session." Stiles said leaning down to pull some wood out of one of the wounds.
"No you will not!" Derek growled his eyes flashing.
"Yes, I will. You have no choice in the matter." Stiles said blowing against the wound to remove some fluff rather than sticking his finger in.
"Stiles." Derek grabbed both of his wrists. "Please understand I will never, ever welcome you into my pack."
"And Derek, please understand I am sick to death of being dragged into alleys and assaulted for information I don't have. If they are going to keep harassing me I will be here helping you all get ready to beat them." Stiles stuck some butterfly tape over a couple of the larger cuts and some thicker, stronger tape over the long slice on his chest. He then started on some of the grazes and cuts around his torso. He cleaned them all but did nothing more knowing they would heal before the band-aids could even stick to the skin.
"You will get drawn into a fight you are not ready for." Derek said in a quieter voice.
"I am in it anyway." Stiles said looking Derek in the eye.
"Okay, I am done." Scott said standing in the doorway.
Stiles pointed to the chair before he said to Derek. "Go and shower, you won't convince me not to be here."
Derek growled at Stiles, teeth bared and eyes changed and then stalked from the room.
"What was that about?" Scott asked when Stiles held his cleaned wound together and taped it up which would hopefully give the wound a better chance of healing.
"I'm coming to the next training session. The hunter's think I am a member of the pack at least I could be helping you all out."
"That isn't a good idea Stiles. They want to kill us all."
"I can help." Stiles said.
"I know you can, I'd prefer you safe though."
"Like you'd make it if I wasn't around." Stiles said wrapping all the bloody things up and leaving the room to throw them in the bin.
When he came back Derek was sitting on the couch next to Scott. He stood and grabbed Stiles' elbow and started frog marching him to the front door.
He opened the door and started pushing Stiles.
"You are not welcome Stiles. Stay away. I will kick you out again if you come back."
Stiles twisted in Derek's arm and pressed his lips to Derek's in a quick, hard kiss. "I will help Derek I am very glad you weren't hurt too badly. Goodbye."
Stiles went out to his car and drove away Derek glaring after him.
4 – Remember This
Lydia curled into Stiles' side. "I know about you and Derek." She whispered.
"What do you know?" Stiles asked.
"That you love him."
"Ahh, well that's true." Stiles said not bothering to lie about it, he knew he didn't hide it well so why lie.
"He loves you too you know. It's why he keeps pushing you away from the pack."
"Lydia, he doesn't like me, let alone love me."
"Oh Stiles, we are all about to have to fight for our lives. Don't choose now to be stupid." Lydia kissed him on the cheek and left the room.
Stiles stared after her for a moment and thought about what she had said. Derek did always kiss him back. He never pushed him away until the kiss was over. Maybe Lydia had a point she generally did about everything. Obviously this theory had to be tested. Stiles smiled at the thought of testing it out.
Moments later Jackson and Scott were pushed into the living room by Lydia and forced onto the couch.
"What?" Jackson asked glaring at his girlfriend.
"We are going to do something that is not training or organising or thinking about the coming fight at all. We are watching a movie. All together. Something happy because it is going to get bad and I want something happy before we get into the fight that could take one of us away."
Derek wondered in moments later and looked at them all then at Lydia.
"What is going on?"
"We are watching a movie." Stiles said.
"We don't have time to watch a movie. We have more preparing to do."
"No!" Lydia said staring at him. "We have trained and practiced and basically done nothing else for weeks and we are supposed to be a pack right? Well packs do things together socially too, right?"
"Not when they have a fight coming up."
"You are avoiding the question." Lydia said. "Sit down and accept that we will be watching this movie because I want something to remember if something goes wrong when they come after us."
Derek turned and sat next to Stiles.
Lydia winked at Stiles who grinned back.
They watched a movie something stupid and funny then Jackson ordered a couple of pizzas and they put something else on.
Everyone was still there will after midnight. No one wanted to go; they all knew they wouldn't get another chance until after the fight and they knew that there was every chance that after the fight they would all be different.
No one wanted to leave but finally there was no choice but for Lydia to stand up and say goodbye. She hugged everyone as she moved around the room. She left with a wave and knew she'd have to speed to get home before he mother checked on her.
Jackson was the next to leave. He smiled as he said goodbye and left the house.
Scott and Stiles were the last to leave. Staying longer again, Scott giving his friend a little extra time.
"Scott, I need to talk to Derek for a moment. I'll meet you in the car."
Scott frowned but nodded and left the house.
"Stiles? What do you want?" Derek asked wearily.
"Lydia said something to me earlier that I just want to test out."
Stiles walked over to Derek and smiled at him before curling his hand around the back of Derek's neck and pulled him in until their lips were almost touching. Stiles looked Derek in the eye before pressing forward, his lips barely pressing before he let his tongue slide along Derek's top lip. Derek opened for him so Stiles pressed in sealing his lips completely against Derek's slipping his tongue in, meeting Derek's which was eagerly pressing back against his. Stiles moaned into the kiss and took as much from Derek as he could, tasting the hint of cheese and pizza and beneath it a taste that must be pure Derek. Derek's hands fisted in Stiles' lower back pulling him closer as Derek took over the kiss and pressed in completely tasting Stiles like he had tasted Derek. When they pulled away both of them were panting and Derek was looking at him with a question in his eyes.
"Lydia said you liked me. I think she was right. You don't kiss someone like that that you don't like."
"Nothing can happen Stiles." Derek said pulling himself away and crossing his arms to glare at Stiles.
"I will convince you otherwise." Stiles said with a grin before turning and leaving the house. He felt light and happy; he could convince Derek to change his mind. After the fight he'd convince Derek that they could do more than just kiss, he went home and allowed himself to wallow in the idea of a future where Derek and he were able to explore whatever was between them.
5 – Argument
"Stiles you are not coming!" Derek said glaring at the human in his lounge room getting ready for a fight.
"Yes I am, I am a part of this and I am not going to be left here to worry about all of you while you go off and fight." Stiles said staring at Derek.
"You are human." Derek reminded him, as though he could ever forget.
"So are the people we are fighting, me being human is not a disadvantage here." Stiles slid a knife into his boot. "I have been training with you the whole time we have been gearing up for his fight. I am not going to sit it out."
"You are a liability; we'll have to worry about you instead of just being able to fight."
The rest of the pack left the room, this wasn't their fight.
"Every member of the pack will be a liability. I can see the way you are whenever the hunters have come after us, you are always worried about them, you watch everyone as you fight. I am no different."
"You are very different." Derek said so quietly Stiles barely heard him.
Stiles moved over and reached for Derek, he was always reaching for Derek but Stiles pulled him close and Derek's lips are warm and solid against his and his kiss was urgent and needy. Derek yanked him close, his entire body moulded to Derek's, Stiles curled his arm around Derek's waist trying to hold him closer for just a little bit longer. Derek's fingers were digging tightly into Stiles' hip.
Derek ripped himself from Stiles and pushed him away. Derek is gasping and his eyes are electric blue. "Stay!"
Stiles wasn't sure if it is a question or a demand but the answer is the same regardless. "I have to come; I am a part of this too."
"You don't have to be." Derek said firmly.
Stiles reached out for Derek let his hand run along Derek's chin. "I chose to be."
Derek dropped his head; let his face rest in Stiles' hand for a moment. "Please don't."
"I love you." Stiles whispered quickly darting forward to press a soft kiss on Derek's lips. "And I have to help."
Stiles left the room, not bothering to wait for a reply which would never come. If he had have waited, if he hadn't have walked away so quickly he might have heard Derek whisper the words into the empty room.
+1 – Goodbye
The fight is vicious. The hunters appear just as the sun is rising; even though the moon holds no real sway over the wolves they fight in the daylight, where they have the most power. There are twenty of them, guns and crossbows and swords, they looked like an army coming for Stiles' family and he doesn't like it.
The hunters fan out, four to a wolf. Four more sitting back and watching, one of them coming for Stiles. He told him to leave, told him he knows he's human and can get out. Stiles punched him. He couldn't kill a human but he could fight, give the wolves a chance to do what they needed to.
Stiles and the hunter who came to him fought, Stiles knew he had a split lip, his concentration yanked away when Scott who had three hunter's bodies behind him either dead or unconscious was on the ground, the hunter above him pulling the sword he had buried in his leg out. Jackson ran passed and knocked him out as he was chased by another hunter.
Stiles caught his hunter with a punch to the stomach giving him a chance to see Lydia kicking one hunter while the other tried to lock her arms at her sides. She caught on of the hunters in the head; he went down quickly just before Stiles had to focus on the man in front of him again.
The fight lasted for longer than Stiles thought possible but he knew that it probably wasn't all that long. His whole body hurt, he had been punched and kicked and beaten but all of the hunters finally seemed to be being dealt with by the werewolves now. There was only one hunter who didn't seem to be joining in but Stiles ignored him and ran for Jackson instead. He threw a rock at the hunter's back and the hunter dropped so Jackson could collect his fists together and with a hard blow to the back of the neck knocked him out before smiling his thanks.
"Stop!" Came the growl from Derek and all eyes turned to him.
Derek held the leader by the throat, the rest of his hunters were lying on the forest floor, most alive and would be fine when they woke up, a few that would need surgery. He held his throat tightly and pulled him close to look him in the eye. "We can win; whatever you bring we can win. We will not kill humans, we will not hurt anyone. Leave us alone."
The leader looked around at the carnage that had been caused and nodded. "If," he struggled to say. "If you hurt anyone we will kill you."
"Fine." Derek said. He let the leader go and then heard it. A gasp behind his back. He spun. A hunter, not taken care of, standing next to Stiles. Stiles looking down, his hands red, his stomach turning red, his skin jagged around the place where the hunter had stabbed him. Stiles looked at him dumbly for a moment. Then down at the wound, abdomen, bad. Stiles dropped, didn't stumble, didn't stagger was standing one moment and down the next. Derek could see him closely now, was hovering above him, didn't even remember moving. He looked at the hunter who had stabbed Stiles and gripped his throat. "He is human." Derek growled out nothing stopping his voice from being that of the alpha, terrifying and fierce.
"He was fighting with you." The hunter said as thought that made it okay.
"Derek?" Stiles voice said from beneath him, worried and pleading. Derek threw the hunter away letting him hit a tree his body falling down limp.
Derek dropped down next to Stiles.
"We'll get you to the hospital. Jackson go and get the car." Derek could hear Jackson running; he was the least injured apart from Derek. He'd get there fastest.
"Derek, I'm not ready to die." Stiles reached his hand up and curled it around Derek's jaw.
Derek's eyes burned and he blinked quickly. "You are not going to die."
"Abdominal wounds are dangerous."
Scott finished crawling over, one of his legs badly damaged and slowly knitting as he settled on Stiles' other side.
"Stiles, you can't die. Your dad, me, everyone we need you. So you cannot die." Scott said as he gripped Stiles' hand tightly.
"Tell dad I love him," Stiles said. "I love you too, you're my brother." Stiles gripped Scott's hand tight but he felt so tired and so weak he didn't know how strong the squeeze was.
"Stiles, you are not allowed to die." Lydia said standing above them.
Stiles smiled at her before his eyes met Derek's again. "I love you." A tear fell down into Stiles' ear. "I can't feel anything that's bad right?"
"Don't leave me Stiles." Derek whispered against Stiles' lips before he pressed forward, his lips warm and firm against Stiles'.
Stiles heard his jeep and felt Derek's lips on his just before the world went black.
Derek pulled away, opened his mouth and howled at the sky.
Before you ask, if you ask I shouldn't assume, I'm not going to write anything else that is the end. (Part of me would love to write a happy ending but I really wanted to write a death fic).