BPOV

This was not how I had pictured my life; it was supposed to be wonderful and everyone that I care about would be there with me through thick and thin but I guess that is what happens after you pushed all your family and friends away. There is one thing that I was grateful for and that was my son Charles Matthew Swan; it has been six years since I have not seen my father and friends, I knew now that she should have listened to them about the guy she was seeing.

Flashback

Felix had just dropped me off at my house; I walked inside and saw my friends and father in the living room discussing something, I walked into the room and they looked up at me.

"Hey guys" I said smiling

"Bells, we are worried about you" my dad said softly

"What are you talking about?" I asked

"Felix, he is controlling you and you cannot even see it" Jake said

"No he is not. He may seem that he is but he just watching out for me" I told them

I left the living room and headed up to my room and shut the door; trying to figure out why they could not see that I was happy with him, I then had a thought in my head and called Felix about it. Once he heard my idea he said that we would leave after my dad went to bed and then we could be together.

End Flashback

"Mommy" my son said jumping on the bed

"Hey baby" I said stopping him from moving and started tickling him

"What are you doing?" I asked him

"Nothing mommy" he said

I lifted him up and got out of bed walking into the kitchen fixing him some breakfast; after it was fixed I put the plate down on the table in front of him and started to get ready for work, I looked over at my four year old son and thought that he should know his grandpa.

Flashback

It has been a year since I have been away from my dad and friends; I did try to call them but every time I started to dial my dad's number Felix was always there to stop it, and started hitting me and punching me in my stomach.

"You worthless whore" he screamed in my face

"I-I'm s-sorry, I will fix your dinner now" I stuttered

"It's ruined now, just fucking clean the house" he growled stomping out of the house and slammed the door

I sat there on the floor few minutes after he left and stared at the spot that he just left; I started to sob uncontrollably and started cleaning the house so he would not come back home upset, I just finished cleaning when I heard a car pull up and the door slam shut.

"Where are you at?" he slurred walking through the door

"BELLA, where are you, you fucking bitch" he yelled

I walked out of my hiding place and stood in front of him, knowing that if I did not go over to him and be obedient then I would get it worse than before. He gripped my hair and dragged me along behind him; once we were in the bedroom he pushed me onto the bed gripping my pants and pulled them down roughly. He pushed his pants down after unbuckling them and got on top of me; I started to struggle, he never did this before.

"Stop" I pleaded trying to push him off of me

"Shut up" he growled slapping me across the face

"Please, don't do this" I pleaded again

"You are nothing but a whore, you love this and you know it" he said pushing inside me roughly

He sped up ignoring my pleas for him to stop; we have done it a few times never had it been this painful and excruciating like it is now, he had always worn a condom never wanted to go without it. He hit my face a few times before he started grunting louder and put his hand over my neck; I kept crying but that did not stop him from chocking me and raping me, after a few minutes he stilled his movements and came inside me. He rolled over and fell asleep; I got up when I knew he was fully asleep and walked into the bathroom and took a shower to get the feeling of him off.

End flashback

That night I wanted to die from feeling all that pain that was inflicted on me left many scares that would not erase for a long time; it wasn't until a month after that day that I noticed changes about myself, so I headed to the doctors and was told some news that scared me.

Flashback

I watched as Felix left the house and was thankful that he has not touched me since that night that he touched me; I waited at least an hour before I started walking towards the hospital in the cold, I wished that I had a car to get places but all Felix said was that I didn't need it and at the time he was treating me well I did not think anything of it.

Once I arrived to the hospital I signed myself in; it was about twenty minutes when the nurse called me back, she took my vitals and checked my weight before telling me that the doctor will be in a few minutes.

"Hello Miss Swan, I'm Dr. Johnson" she said

"Hello" I said softly

"It says here that you think you're pregnant" she said looking at her

"Yes, I have not been feeling good for a month" she explained

"Well, let's take a look, shall we?" she asked guiding her to lie down

"What is it?" she asked the doctor

"You are pregnant" Dr. Johnson told her

"Thank you" I said after everything was finished and she gave me prenatal vitamins

I started the track back to the house and thought that my child should not live the way I do; so once I reached the house I took a trash bag and collected everything that I would need and all the memento's that I took with me when I left home, I looked at the time and saw that I had at least two hours before he showed back home and I walked out leaving everything that did not mean anything to me behind.

End Flashback

I took my sons hand and started walking to take Charles to the babysitter; once he was with Angela I headed to the only bakery in Forks, I still don't have the courage to go see my dad. I always wondered if he would want to see me after everything that I have put him through when she was going out with Felix.

Flashback

I had just rented a hotel room thankful that I had stashed my money away so Felix did not spend it all on something useless; I walked into the room setting all of my belongings down and started looking for a job.

"Hello, how can I help you?" said one of the servers

"I was wondering if you were hiring?" I asked her

"We sure are honey, follow me" she said leading me towards the back

She showed me the boss' door and told me to go in and start to talk to him about the job; when I sat down one the chair a guy with dirty blonde hair that was tied behind his head with blue eyes with a name plate on his desk with the name James Cameron, he looked up at me.

"How can I help you?" he asked me

"My name is Bella Swan and I heard that you were hiring and I was wondering if I could apply" I asked him

"Okay, what happened to your cheek?" he asked

"I fell" I said softly

"Bullshit, everyone that comes into this bar has a story. So let's hear your story honey" he said walking over and sat next to me

"It's long story" I said

"That does not matter" was all he said

"Well, I was living at home a year and a half ago; everyone that cared for me was trying to get me to understand that my boyfriend was controlling I just thought they didn't want me with him, but I decided to run away with him one night and have not been in contact with my dad since. I have tried but every time I get close my ex kept grabbing the phone telling me that I was worthless and that my father was glad to get rid of me, I did not believe him but I could not get access to the phone because he always hid it or locked it away. Last month he came home one night drunk as hell and pulled me towards the room and raped me and I just found out that I am pregnant today" I said softly

"Well, then we will treat you right here and show you love, when can you start?" he asked putting a hand on my knee

"What are you doing?" I asked him scared

"Don't worry, I am gay sweetheart" he said smiling

"Okay, I can start tonight" I told him

"Wonderful, come on" he said getting up and walked out of his office

I followed him out of his office down the hall; he walked behind the counter to a tall female with red hair tied behind her hair with hazel eyes, she looked over at us and smiled softly going back to what she was doing.

"Victoria, this is Bella. She is new here and I would like you to show her the ropes" he told her

"Got it, boss" she said with a country twang

"So, Bella have you ever worked in a bar?" she asked twirling a bottle then began pouring

"No, I was not allowed to work when I was living with the guy that I ran away from" I told her

"That's okay, so how old are you hun?" she asked me

"Nineteen" I told her

"Okay, let's get work" she told me

For the next three hours Victoria or as she told me call her Vicky taught me the basics of what I would need to do and if I had any more questions about anything just ask her.

End flashback

Vicky and I kept it touch after I was put on maternity leave; she even helped me to get set up in school so I could get my degree and to get myself to where I wanted to be at. She called me a year after I moved into my apartment to tell me that Felix was still out there and that it seemed to be that he always picked up girls that look just like me.

I walked into the bakery and started baking every order that was placed; I heard a chime and looked up to see some customers I stop what I am doing and walk over to them.