Only Death Will Part Us Now
"BLAINE!" He wrapped his arms around him as tightly as he could, sobbing so hard.
"Hey, hey, hey, take it easy," Blaine soothed, hugging him back, holding him. "Shh, shh, it's okay, it's okay, baby. It was just a dream."
"No, no, no, no," he bawled, shaking his head, simply clinging to him, listening to his voice, feeling him breathe, so full of life again. "No, it was so real, Blaine, it was so real."
"Shh, I've got you. It's okay. It's okay now. Shh…" He swore, trying to make him feel better; he only cried harder. "Kurt, hey, hey, easy, look at me, baby. What did you dream about?" Kurt whimpered, face buried in his neck, clinging to him so tight.
"You were gone," he breathed. "You died, you died in my arms, Blaine, I lost you. You left me!" He understood then, seeing Kurt's pain set deep in his eyes that continued to leak tears, his chest tight.
"Kurt, honey," he ducked to meet his eyes, offering him a smile, swallowing the lump in his throat, holding back his own tears. He hated, hated seeing Kurt in so much pain. He never wanted to see him cry; he was far too beautiful for that. "Baby, I'm not gonna leave you. I'm right here, baby. It was just a dream, I promise."
He knew his words would only do so much. He'd woken to Kurt crying in his sleep, saying his name over and over before he started screaming. Then that one scream. That one bone-chilling scream that sent shivers down his spine, his stomach a block of ice. He'd been trying to get Kurt to wake for several minutes prior to that but then…then he had to.
"I felt the life leave you," he shuddered. "I watched the light leave your eyes. I kissed your dead lips. You were cold…So cold…"
"Look at me," he urged, touching him so gently. "I am right here. I'm not going anywhere, okay? I'm right here, just for you, Kurt. And how could I leave you? We're supposed to get married." Instead of calming him, as he intended, Kurt just cried harder, a broken mess. Blaine held him to his chest, rocking him gently, thumbing his cheeks and running his fingers through his hair.
"Blaine, please… Please, don't let me go," he begged.
"I'm not going anywhere," he swore. "I'm staying right here with you, okay?"
"You-you can't go to the cast meeting today," he said, looking up at him with shining eyes. Blaine frowned, looking at his distraught love, wanting to do anything to make him smile, or at least get him to stop crying. "You can't, that's how you died. Please, please stay here with me, ple-hease!"
"Hey, hey, hey, easy. I won't leave you. I'm not going anywhere. I'll call them and tell them you're sick and I can't leave you," he held him to his chest, stroking his hair. "I'm here. I'm right here. Shh…"
Kurt managed to curl into a tiny ball, fitting in Blaine's lap, hands holding his arm, face in his chest, breathing in the soft-sweet scent that was Blaine.
Blaine kissed his forehead, still rocking slowly, caressing his arms and his cheeks. "Sing to me?" Kurt whispered, eyes swollen, voice broken, body shaking.
"Of course," he said softly, smiling very gently. "I think you're pretty without any make up on. I think you're funny when you tell the punch line wrong. I knew you got me when you let your walls come down…" He sang, breaking from their usual routine and singing Boyce Avenue. Kurt shut his eyes, crying silently, happy just to be near him when he thought he'd never get the chance again. "Let's just talk all through the night, there's no need to love." He nuzzled their noses together, smile spreading into a grin when Kurt managed to smile. "We can dance until we die. You and I will be young forever." He placed a soft, gentle kiss on his shaking lips."You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream. The way you turn me on. I can't sleep. Let's run away and don't ever look back, don't ever look back." He rubbed his back, nuzzling his nose again. "I'll never, ever, leave you, Kurt. You know that, don't you?" He nodded, sniffling.
"I know you won't leave me," he breathed. "I just…I just can't get the image of you lying in my arms out of my head." Tears again.
"Shh, hey, hey, no more of that. No more, baby," he urged, smiling, his big eyes imploring him, full of pain as he looked at him.
"You were so scared, Blaine," he said, eyes shut. "You were so scared God wouldn't let you go to Heaven. I told you he would. I promised he would. You handed me your engagement ring and-"
"Don't baby. Don't, everything's okay. Shh…" More kisses and soft rocking, more efforts to make him smile. "Please don't cry anymore. Can you smile for me?" He asked gently. Kurt took a deep breath, looking at him. Blaine kissed him again, pressing their foreheads together. "No? You need me to sing 'Memory' again? I'll do it, I swear I will," he teased. Kurt did smile, shaking his head at his dork of a fiancée.
He sat with him, holding him for awhile, still singing softly, wondering if he'd fall back to sleep or not.
"Why don't we move the wedding up?" He whispered, breaking a period of silence.
Kurt nodded, swallowing. "This weekend sounds good." He smiled up at him. Blaine grinned back.
"I was thinking March instead of May," he said. Kurt nodded, placing a careful kiss on his neck.
"The sooner the better," he nodded. "I want you to be mine forever. Officially." Blaine smiled, squeezing him tight.
"I love you," he breathed, snuggling closer to him, clinging so tight his fingers ached. "I love you so much. I don't tell you that enough. Or how much I need you, how much you mean to me. I don't say it-"
"Kurt Elizabeth, you look at me right now," Blaine said firmly. "Don't you ever, ever think I don't know you love me. I know you do. I know how much you care. And if you need me half as much as I need you…" He shook his head. He held his face while they kissed. "That was just an awful dream, okay, baby? I'm not going anywhere and I won't leave you. I love you."
He laid down with him, covering him up again, wrapped up tight in his arms. "You need to get some rest," he said. Kurt swallowed hard, shaking just a little.
"Blaine, I…I'm scared to sleep," he admitted. "I can't go through that again, I just can't."
"Shh, I'm here. I've got you, and I'll be right here to wake you up if that's what you need. I swear, Kurt," he promised, kissing his cheek. "Shh, sleep. Just sleep…"
Kurt closed his eyes, surrounding himself in Blaine's smell, feeling his breath and his heartbeat, the skin of his arms in the embrace. He memorized this feeling, this smell, this moment. Dream or no dream he felt as if he'd almost lost him, and he needed to be as close to him as he could possibly get.
"Sometimes I wonder if this is a dream," Blaine whispered thoughtfully, stroking his hair. "You and me, here in New York, engaged and happy." Kurt looked up at him through his lashes, eyes shining and beautiful, Blaine noted.
He nodded, chuckling ruefully. "When you were stuffed in as many lockers as I was you never think that things like this can happen to you." Kurt gently kissed his neck.
"I didn't think I'd get you either," he said, eyes drooping. Blaine continued smoothing his hair, happy the treatment was working.
"Why not?" He whispered, understanding Kurt would be nothing but honest in his drowsy state.
"When you're as awkward and ugly as I was you don't think this will ever happen to you," he said softly. Blaine winced, shaking his head again.
"Damn it, Kurt, I hate it when you do that," he whispered.
"Do what?" He replied without opening his eyes.
"Get down on yourself like that," he sighed, exasperated. "You're beautiful. You always have been and you always will be."
"And you deserve every bit of happiness that you get no matter how disappointed your father says he is in you," Kurt mumbled. Blaine blanched, staring at him for a moment. He sighed, settling into their embrace.
"I love you," he said, trying not to look at the tear-stains still soaking his pillow.
"I love you too," he said, opening his heavy eyes again. He touched his cheek, still making sure that Blaine was still here. "Project Runway marathon later?" He offered. Blaine giggled, giving him another kiss.
"Then sex," Kurt mumbled, half asleep once more. "A lot of it." Blaine's cheeks pinked.
"What's the occasion?"
"Let's call it 'my-fiancée-died-in-a-dream-and-I-need-to-appreciate-him-more sex,'" he suggested. Blaine relaxed, holding him close.
They drifted off to sleep again, Kurt calm but still slightly fearful the dream world would force him to see him die again.
He wandered through the empty halls, lost and alone, looking for something but he wasn't sure what.
"Hello?" His voice echoed throughout the unfamiliar place that was more of a maze than anything. "Is anyone there?" Still nothing.
He descended a set of stairs, frantic and scared. He paused when he saw someone standing at the bottom, looking away from him.
"Excuse me," he said, reaching out and tapping his shoulder, relieved. The boy turned. His heart stopped.
The most beautiful, handsome man he'd ever seen in his life looked up at him, big brown eyes wide, jaw dropping a little.
"Can I ask you something? I'm new here," he managed.
"My name's Blaine," the beauty had a name. He took his hand, but instead of shaking it, he guided him down the stairs to the floor, taking him into his arms. "And I've been looking for you forever." He didn't have the chance to speak as Blaine's lips gently connected with his.
In his sleep, Kurt Hummel sighed happily.