Own nothing. Not Beta'd
I was just getting more comfortable when I heard the buzzer at the front of my apartment go off at 8:05. I looked in my full length mirror before I left my room and headed to the intercom.
"Who is it?" I asked.
"Uh..Edward" he said loudly as if his mouth was really close to the intercom down the hall. I pressed the button to buzz him in and opened the front door. Edward, who looked amazing in a pair of dark washed jeans and a white tee shirt, came strolling up to my open door with his beautiful smile.
If this pregnancy is viable, I hope the baby gets his smile because it is fucking stunning I thought to myself.
"Long time, no see" he said with a grin.
I smiled back and waved him in. He moved his way to the loveseat and sat down.
I walked over to the couch.
"Do you want anything to drink? Water or pop maybe?" I asked
"No I'm good. Thank you though" he replied.
"How are you? Did you appointment go well today?" He asked. He sounded normal but something looked off in his eyes. It looked like he was worried.
"Um… I'm….I don't really know how I am right now. I feel like…well I'm getting ahead of myself. I called you because I needed to talk to you." Edward's face fell a little. I hoped he wouldn't hate me for the shit I was about to bring into his life.
"Edward, I'm um… I'm pregnant." I said. I instantly looked down because I couldn't face him. I was so embarrassed. With myself. With the situation. With how much I ruined our lives.
After about five minutes of silence I looked up. Edward looked so sad and pissed.
"Is it mine? How did this happen?"
"I'm so sorry Edward. I uh well I ran out of birth control a day or two before we um…hooked up and well I must have forgotten and I'm…. I'm just so sorry." I said with tears brimming. He just sat there not saying anything.
Finally he seemed to be coming out of his trance. The first thing he did was rub his face with his hands as if trying to get rid of his anger.
"You didn't answer my first question. Are you sure it's mine?" he said evenly.
"Do you think I would be telling you I was knocked the fuck up if it wasn't Edward? Do you think I would just call this random guy over to tell him instead of the… the embryo's father?" I got up and walked to the kitchen to grab some water hoping it would calm me down. I was so angry right now. I get it. Doubting your one nighter is probably normal but fucking really? Why did he think I would be telling him if it wasn't his?!
I came back and sat on my recliner. I curled up into myself ready for the rejection. I knew I needed to give him a chance to leave if that's what he wanted. It would kill me that my kids would be dad-less but I would get over it and be the best mother it could have.
"Anyway, I don't want anything from you. I just wanted to let you know. I wanted to give you an out. I made this mess, so I'm going to deal with it. I'm keeping it and I understand if you want nothing to do with us." I blurted out.
I looked up at him because it was again quiet for too long. He looked furious. He didn't even try to hide it this time.
"Are you kidding me Bella?" He said incredulously. "I would never do some bullshit like that. I can't believe you would even fucking think that." I could tell he was having trouble keeping his temper in check.
"Well, I wouldn't know how you would react, would I? We've hung out a total of once without fucking. We don't really know each other. I'm not a mind reader. Fuck!" I yelled. I knew it was irrational to get angry with him when he was trying to process but I couldn't stand the tone of his voice. I wasn't a fucking child and I wasn't an idiot. I thought I was offering him something most would jump at.
I took responsibility for this pregnancy. Sure we didn't have a condom but I could have stopped it all had I remember that I was off my pill. If I wasn't so caught up in stupid shit, I could have got an got myself a plan b pill.
Once my mini rant was over, I was just done. I was drained for the day. With tears in my eyes I went to my bedroom and shut the door. It was what I did. I ran. I'm a lot like my mother in the flight or fight department at times.
I took comfort in my bed and just let it all out into my pillow.
After a while, once my sobbing turned into silent crying, I felt the other side of my bed dip. I slowly opened my eyes to see my favorite set of green eyes, red rimmed and staring back at me.
"I'm sorry beautiful." He said as he brought his hand to my face and wiped the tears away. "I just… I just wasn't expecting it. But even so, I was a dick. I'm sorry. I know that we don't know each other that well but I would never leave someone with all the responsibility in a situation I helped create."
"I'll be there Bella. For every ultrasound and appointment, for all the big moments and for all the shitty times. I'll be there for it all. I've always wanted kids. I mean I just didn't think they would be coming until about 8 years from now." He said with a sigh.
"Are you sure Edward? Because I can't do the whole flip flop bullshit. I can't think I'm going to be able to rely on you to have you turn around on what you say. I can't have you blowing me and this baby off if you find your happily ever after. I just can't do it." I said sadly as I looked down.
His hand gently grabbed my chin and pulled my face up so I was looking at him.
"That will NEVER happen" he replied adamantly. "This is our baby. My responsibility to it will trump any woman who comes around. And who says you aren't my happily ever after?" I must have given him a look because before I could say anything, he continued.
"I'm not saying it has to be something that happens now or because we're having a baby. Since I met you at the bar, I wanted to take you out and… I don't know date you. I know I went about it the wrong way. Did you know that I went back to Eclipse every Friday, with the exception of yesterday. I wanted to see you again so badly." He paused, with a sigh, before continuing.
"I'm sorry Bella. While you thought you were on the pill, I should have used a condom. It was stupid not to and honestly, this is as much my fault as it is yours. But I'll be here. I'll always be here for the little one and you."
I couldn't believe my ears. He wanted to get to know me? He wanted to stick around even though I had royally fucked up. It seemed too good to be true. I was hesitant to give him a chance but really he had done nothing to make him unworthy of my trust.
"Okay" I said quietly. "We'll give it a shot."
We laid there quietly for a while. At some point I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I remembered was Edward's hand running gently, up and down my side. I stretched before opening my eyes.
When I did, I was greeted with my favorite greens again. I was so glad he didn't have to leave like the day before.
"I hope the baby has your eyes." I said out loud without meaning to.
He just chuckled. "Eh, I would prefer the baby have your eyes. They're stunning."
"I hope it has your hair and color. It's really wonderful." I said with a grin.
He simply smiled back. "Are you hungry? We never got that pizza last night."
"Yea. I'm actually starving right now." As if I needed to prove the state of hunger I was in, my stomach growled.
"Okay well let me take you out to breakfast. I know this great little place." He said.
"That would be nice. Let me freshen up. Um…I don't know if you want, but I have some extra tooth brushes in the cabinet of the guest bathroom."
He looked at me with a serious expression "Are you saying my breath stinks?"
I was so embarrassed. I didn't mean to make it seem as if he had horrific morning breath. "Um…No. That's not what I meant. I just…you know, I just don't feel good in the morning unless I brush my teeth. I'm sorry." I rushed out.
He busted up laughing and a huge, gorgeous smile graced his face. "I'm just kidding Bella."
I gave him a look and started to walk towards my bathroom. As I was walking away I muttered "asshole" under my breath.
He started laughing again.
"I'll be in your living room when you're done!"
He was so easy to like and get along with.
I hoped this wouldn't all come crashing down in the end because I wanted it to work.
What do you think about Edwards reaction? It wasn't so bad right? See you next time!