A/N: Just a random idea that hit me. Mostly just random crap xD FORGIVE MY FAIL HUMOUR.

Daily Diary

Lussuria giggled as he whipped out his signature pink gel pen from who-knows-where and scripted 'The Varia's' above 'Daily Diary' in his elegant cursive writing. He held the pen to his face, "Perfect~!"

The Varia's Daily Diary

Entry 1:

The Diary That Brings Happiness To All

25 January~


Dear diary, today's the day I told the rest of my babies about you!

"Squ-chan~! Get down here, and remember to bring Bossu! I have an announcement to make!"

I heard Squ-chan grunt from upstairs (My, he really DOES have a loud voice) and he yelled back at me, "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT? AND THIS BETTER BE IMPORTANT!" Forgive me for writing in capitals, but I really must emphasize on Squ-chan's ear-shattering voice. It's lovely, really.

"It is, it is! Bel-chan and the others are already here!"

"Ushishishi~ Shut up, peasant."

"KYA!", I squealed as I dodged one of Bel-chan's oddly shaped knives, "Mou, Bel-chan!"

"Don't pout. It's disgusting."

"Fraaaaaan-chaaaan~!", I whimpered, diving for the youngest member, "Don't call Mama 'disgusting'!"

His response were merely muffles. Oh, my.

"Ushishishi~ Stop suffocating the frog. The other peasant and Boss have arrived~"

I immediately let go of Fran and turned to Squ-chan and Bossu.


I never got to hug him, though. Bossu whipped out his scary X-guns and aimed them right at me.

"Trash, get on with it before I kill you."

"Eep!", I gasped, then continued, "Why, of course~!"

I dug through my pocket and fished out a nice, white book which had the words 'The Varia's Daily Diary' printed on the cover. "This would be it~!"

Bossu got this really scary look on his face then.

"Is this a joke, trash?"

"Mou, I NEVER joke!", I said, pouting, "Keeping a daily diary's important!"

"Ushishishi~ Gay."

"It is NOT!", I shouted, pouting some more, "It really IS important. Let me tell you why~"

Squlo swore under his breath and flopped down onto the couch. I heard him mutter something about 'this is gonna take a while...' Oh my, it's the first time he hasn't shouted! I am so proud.

"Obviously, we're not gonna be here forever...", I started ,"Except Bossu, 'cause he's immortal", I added as an afterthought, earning a glare from said Bossu.

"So, we should have something that will steer the NEW Varia in the right direction!", I continued, waving my hands for added effect, "And THAT'S when it hit me! We needed a daily diary~!"

"VOIII! WHAT THE HELL DOES A FUCKING DIARY HAVE TO DO WITH GUIDING THE NEW VARIA?", Squ-chan burst, jumping off the couch. I swear, he looked this close to strangling me.

"S-Squ-chan! It has EVERYTHING to do with guiding the new Varia! For one, it'll tell them all about what we do in the Varia~!", I shouted back, defending my dear diary.


"Mou, but that's different! You won't get that warm, fuzzy feeling!"


"All of you. Shut. The. Fuck. Up."

We all quickly silenced ourselves; when Bossu gets in a bad mood, the wisest thing to do is obey.

"If the Gay Lord wants to keep a BLOODY diary, let him. But I'm not going to be a part of this shit. Understood?"

We all quickly nodded, some more reluctant than others, and Bossu marched back to his room.

"Tch... Damn boss...", Squalo muttered, glaring at the spot where Bossu had been.

"So it's settled then~!", I announced, clasping my hands together. "Tomorrow will be someone else's turn to write an entry~!"

And before I got to choose the next person, they all ran away. Oh, poo.

End of Entry 1. Tell me who you think should write Entry 2 xD And if it wasn't obvious enough, I own nothing.

Special thanks to ShiroiSuna for pointing out my mistakes! I'm sorry I couldn't really fix the 'gay' problem but I'll make sure I use it at a minimum.

-Plastic Petals.