Dear Avengers,

I recently found out that my car insurance does not cover "super-human damage" of any sort without the purchase of a separate policy. Given that I live in New York, would you recommend the extra expense?

Sincerely, MadroxMR

Dear MadroxMR,

Oh dear God, yes.

Sincerely, Bruce Banner

Dear MadroxMR,

Mine alter ego Donald Blake hath faced similar discriminatory policies when facing the Lords of Indemnification which appear to rule this realm when he discovered that "acts of God" were explicitly excluded from coverage. This presented a problem as he would oft act as the earthly incarnation of my deific presence. To aid in resolving this plight, I contacted the business's department of Midgardian mortal resources, only to find that my devious and tricksome brother had bewitched the underwriters. Thus, I bested him in glorious combat and Blake's financial security was once again assured.

Loki's machinations may be behind your conundrum as well. I suggest surrounding your car with a ring of finely shaven silver to delay his egress.

Sincerely, Thor Odinson

Dear Thor,

Mortal metals will not stop me. You're thinking of werewolves.

Sincerely, Loki

Dear Loki,

Brother! It makes my heart glad to read thine words once more. You are right; I do often think of werewolves! Let us join forces and aid this mortal in his struggle against coverage limits and/or lycanthropy!

Sincerely, Thor Odinson

Dear Thor,


Sincerely, Loki

Dear Avengers,

I am not sure whether to take up karate lesson or flower arranging lesson. Which do you think would be better, for a girl who has half boyish and half girly personality?


Iron Rose Flower

P.S. Is Hawkeye dating Agent Coulson (Super Secret Agent Man)? If they are, that would be so cute. ^_^

Dear Iron Rose Flower,

No, Agent Coulson and I are not dating, though I can say that he is a handsome and personable fellow without feeling any threat whatsoever to my heterosexuality.

With regard to choosing a new hobby, the important thing is to follow your heart. Pick the activity that you think you will most enjoy and you're well on your way to becoming a confident and well-rounded person.

Sincerely, Hawkeye

Dear Hawkeye,


Sincerely, Jessica Cage

Dear Iron Rose Flower,

Some people think that karate makes you tough. It doesn't. I speak from experience.

Flower arranging sounds like a hoot and a half, though. Not only will you get to expand your knowledge of flora, you will probably get to meet more than a few six-legged friends stuck onto your flowers! I say, go for it!

Sincerely, Hank Pym, PhD

Dear Hank,

Yeah, I don't think that the promise of beetles is really going to entice young women to take up botany.

Sincerely, Every Woman Everywhere

Dear Ms. Marvel,

I know you've gotten yourself some kind of super-Kree powers or whatnot, but that does not make you authorized to speak for every woman everywhere. Some girls like insects.

Sincerely, Spider Woman

Dear Spider Woman,

Spiders aren't insects. Dumbass.

Sincerely, Ms. Marvel

Dear Avengers,

Doesn't anybody care that Hawkeye has been replaced with a SKRULL?

Sincerely, Jessica Cage

Dear Jessica Cage,

Nah, you know what? I think we're just going to let this one play out.

Sincerely, Any Avenger Who Has Ever Had Hawkeye Drop a Water Balloon Full of Jello on Them from 500 Feet Up