Hey guys, hope you like this and find it funny! Remember to R&R! I would really appreciate it.
Love and kisses,
Though I never admitted it, ever since Katy Perry became famous, she became my idol. Every night when I told my death eaters that I was plotting revenge on that disgusting little slimeball Harry Potter, and that I didn't want to be disturbed, I was actually singing along to subtitled 'Katy Perry song lyrics' on my karaoke screen which I never told anyone I had. Everyone assumed it was some kind of evil device (I covered it with a bed sheet so no-one could see what it actually was), and if they ever found out it wasn't it wouldn't create too much trouble because my death eaters wouldn't recognise a muggle device.
One night, trouble stirred.
I shut my door firmly, checked the corridors for any peekers, and breathed a sigh of relief. All was clear.
I cleared my throat, picked up the microphone and turned on the screen.
It flashed the words, "Teenage dream."
Yes! My favourite!
I started singing along to the lyrics, and dancing. I waved my arms above my head and swayed my hips from side to side. Then I heard a shuffling of feet.
I inhaled sharply and turned around. There was nobody there.
If there was, I would burn them alive and feed them to Nagini.
That would teach them to mess with the Dark Lord.
I pressed pause on the song and looked out the hall just in case.
Then I pressed play.
"You make me feel like I'm livin' a-" the screen sang. What a marvellous invention.
"Teenage dream, the way you-" I screeched the other half of the sentence, and I jumped up and down when I felt a presence.
I quickly turned the screen off and turned around. There I saw Lucius Malfoy standing there with his mouth wide open. If I were a normal wizard,(which I am not!)
then I would have blushed, but since I was the Dark Lord himself, I couldn't risk looking like a wimpy loser who danced to Katy Perry.
"What do you want?" my red eyes narrowed to slits and my mouth became one thin line.
"Uh…um…i-uh…" Lucius gaped.
"What is it you blubbering fool? I thought I told you NOT to interrupt me! Does the Dark Lord's orders mean nothing to you, you stupid idiotic worthless moron(I got that word from the muggle English dictionary, but I refuse to tell my death eaters that I use the muggle dictionaries. But the word sounds so awesome! MORON!)!"
"I-I'm sorry! Wait- what's a moron?" he asked.
"Do not avoid answering my question!" I spat.
"I'm sorry my lord." He bowed and continued, "I came to see what all the noise was." he said, pointing to the screen. "It turns out…that." He said, suddenly interested in his shoes. I turned a furious red, not caring if that ruined my image, and I picked up the nearest chair and threw it at him. "GET OUT OF MY SIGHT, YOU IMBECILE! THAT'S IT, GET LOST! OUT OUT OUT!" I roared. He whimpered and ran for the door. "AND YOU WILL NOT SPEAK OF THIS TO ANYBODY, OR ELSE I WILL CUT YOU, THEN BURN YOU, THEN FEED YOU ALIVE TO NAGINI WHICH I WILL NOT HESITATE TO DO IF YOU DON'T OBEY ME!" I screamed.
Malfoy looked extremely frightened as he swept out through my door and muttered, "Of course my lord."
Then I calmed down a bit, and turned the screen back on.
Gosh, how I love Katy Perry.