August 29, 2011

It's been four years since my girlfriend, Summer, dumped me. I should've known it was coming.

She was the first woman I ever loved, but I'll admit she was so high-maintenance. That made things so much more stressful than it needed to be when I was executor of my great-uncle Bruno's estate.

It's just that when we first met, she was the nicest girl ever. She laughed at my jokes, listened to what I had to say. And she was beautiful. It was amazing for a Goth loser like me to get a girl like her.

To be honest, I still haven't gotten over her yet. And it's been four years.