Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
Foreword: This was something I came up with while I was eating lunch one day. There were two guys not too far from where I was sitting and they were arguing whether or not it was easy to ask a girl out. I thought it was funny and then I began thinking it was something Ron and Harry would argue about. With just a little changes and variations here and there, we have this story!
By Romantic Silence
"Ron, I've been watching you pace back and forth in front of the fire place for thirty minutes now. What in blazes are you up to?"
Ron stopped his pacing and turned to look at Harry. He narrowed his eyes and glared at the raven-haired teen and opened his mouth to give his reply. Nothing came out and Ron simply stood on the rug with his mouth open and the light of the fire behind him.
Harry stared at Ron, raised an eyebrow, and then decided it was better not to know. He looked back down on his textbook and found the seventy-fifth Goblin uprising in 1692 to be utterly fascinating. Professor Binns had outdone himself this time. He was so inspired that perhaps he should take up a career in being a History of Magic professor.
"Oi! I thought you wanted to know!"
Harry sighed and looked back up. In a deadpan tone, he responded, "I did, but now I don't."
"Well, mate, I'm going to be telling you anyway!" Ron shouted.
Joy. Harry rolled his eyes.
"I want to ask this girl out and I have no idea how to do it."
Girl problems. Well, that was certainly interesting. Deciding that it was much more entertaining to devote time to helping Ron with girls, Harry closed his book and gave his utmost attention to Ron.
"Just ask her." Harry told him.
Ron stared at his best mate with shock and gasped. "You can't just do that!"
Again, Harry rolled his eyes. If there was one thing he learned about his Sixth Year in Hogwarts, it was that teenage drama was utterly stupid. He realized that it was only dramatic because they – in their hormone-induced state – made it dramatic. To be honest, this epiphany actually made him feel much more confident around young women and Harry was thankful that he was no longer tongue-tied whenever he talked to a girl he was attracted to. It was nice and he felt much more comfortable in his own skin than ever before.
It was for that reason why Harry no longer understood why Ron was saying that blokes simply can't just do that.
"Why?" Harry asked, already bored with the conversation.
"You have to be romantic. You have to get flowers and chocolates and all sorts of jewelry!" Ron ranted. "You need to make it special. You need to make it amazing so that she will forever remember it when the two of you marry."
Harry's jaw dropped. While he would not dismiss that it was good to be romantic, did other teenage boys really believe that they had to butter up the girl with gifts. Granted, it was nice, but it was just easier to ask a girl than go to such ridiculous lengths to pop the question.
"Are you barking mad, Ron? Just ask the girl. You don't need all that stuff to get her to agree to go on a date with you."
Ron clicked his tongue. "Of course you wouldn't know how to date a girl; this is why I didn't want to ask you. You see, I have a book called 12 Ways to Woo a Witch and they told me everything I needed to know to get a girl to date me."
Harry felt slightly offended. Just because he didn't have a girlfriend, it didn't mean he did not know how to date! Granted, his track record was abysmal because of Cho, but that was only one girl! He learned from his experiences! Besides, if he wanted to, he could date any witch he wanted at any given moment. He simply chose not to because – apparently – he was a noble Gryffindor. That and he wanted to date a certain witch.
"I read that book. It's a load of bollocks."
"It is not." Ron argued. "Fred and George gave it to me to help me out."
Harry wasn't sure if it was appropriate to facepalm at that very moment. Ron had gotten the book from the Twins. The Twins, whom were known for practical jokes and were making a living out of a successfully flourishing joke shop in Diagon Alley, gave Ron that book. It was also known that Ron was the Twins' favorite subject for their pranks. Harry knew Ron was thick, but he didn't know he was that thick.
"So, as you can see, Harry, I know much more about the way to a girl's heart." Ron stated in a proud, victorious manner.
"Ron, I'll prove to you that asking a girl out on a date is easy." Harry challenged.
Ron snorted. "I would like to see that happen."
Harry smiled in a relaxed manner, but underneath his skin, his blood was boiling. He loved Ron like a brother, but there was a limit that ginger could say to him. He needed to prove his masculinity and show that his confidence wasn't all hot air. Immediately, he searched the common room for a certain girl and found her sitting at a table not too far away. She was scribbling on a piece of parchment.
He shouted, "Hey Hermione!"
"WHAT!" She yelled back, clearly annoyed.
"Want to go on a date with me to Hogsmeade this weekend?"
"Fine! By the way, tell Ron to keep it down! The Transfiguration essay is due tomorrow and I have to revise!"
Harry grinned and turned back to Ron. He crossed his arms and gave his red-haired friend a cocky and triumphant smirk. He said, "I told you it was easy."
Ron merely gaped at him.
Feeling that his work was done, Harry patted Ron on the shoulder and collected his belongings. He still needed to finish up his reading assignment and thought it was better to do it in the dorm. Harry left the common room and went up the staircase, saying good night to Hermione along the way and placing a soft kiss on her cheek before leaving.
Ron remained standing in front of the fireplace, jaw slack.
"But... Hermione was the one I wanted to ask out..."