The Ultimate Dare-Off

By: Light-Eco-Sage

Rated: Teen for epic silliness and canon/non-canon pairings (the last only in fun.)

Summary: While bored at a meeting in the Fire Nation, Toph suggests that the Gaang hold a dare-off competition. Who will be the last one standing, and will they retain their dignity by the end of it? Of course not!

Disclaimer: Avatar: The Last Airbender is owned by Mike and Bryan, Avatar Gods! Worship them, and then torture their characters for fun!

LES: This story is inspired by a Dare-Off story in the Danny Phantom section, which has to be one of the funniest stories that I've ever read. In case you don't know, this is how a dare off works…

Each person takes turns giving dares to the others. The dare is for everyone except for the person giving the dare. Each person is given a number of "Chickens" at the start. You can 'pay' one of your chickens and that lets you out of doing one dare. However, when you run out of chickens, then you are permanently out of the game. Continue dares until there is only one person left.

The members of the Gaang participating in the Dare-Off are: Aang, Katara, Sokka, and Toph. I'll give them each four chickens. And, of course, I'll keep you updated on Chicken status. Also, I'll take requests for future dares and also votes for who should be the ultimate winner. If I use your dare idea, I'll credit you in the appropriate chapter.

So… I think that's it! Enjoy the silliness!

Chapter I: Let's Make This Interesting

Political meetings were, in a word… dull.

And that only seemed to become truer when you are a teenager being forced to not only attend, but pay attention to these meetings. But that seemed to be the price to pay being associated with the Avatar.

Aang and Zuko, of course, put the most effort into paying attention. They both felt that they had titles to live up to: Avatar and Firelord, respectfully. But Katara and Sokka knew that Zuko was only pretending to pay attention, as his eyes were glazed over. The fifteen year old Avatar, on the other hand, was paying attention. But the frown on his face and the slouch of his posture made it clear that he was not happy with the fact.

Sokka had taken to doodling on his notes, and Katara was watching his progress, trying to figure out if he was drawing a human-like figure or a Sabertooth Moose-Lion. Trying to figure out if her brother's scribbles were supposed to be antlers or hair was infinitely more enjoyable to listening to the Earth Kingdom windbag who was blabbering on about who-knows-what.

Toph wasn't even bothering to pretend hiding how bored she was. She had her bare feet up on the table as she leaned back in her chair, and she amused herself by flicking little pebbles at the man who was speaking; taking pleasure each time she managed to distract him.

Eventually, the old windbag got the message and gave up his long-winded speech, instead calling for a short break. The council made plans to reconvene in a half-hour, and everyone was glad to leave the room as quickly as possible.

Outside the room and just down the hallway, Aang leaned heavily against a wall, rubbing his temples to try to alleviate the pounding head-ache he had. Honestly, he was just not made to be sitting still for so long. In fact, he'd go as far to say that sitting in that council room for hours at a time was far more exhausting than a five-hour Earthbending session with Toph. He'd take the later any day.

His mood lifted slightly when he spotted his girlfriend, Katara, Sokka, and Toph heading his way, looking equally downtrodden. Perhaps it was mean, but it was true what they say… misery loves company.

"Was it just me, or did anyone else catch a single word of that speech?" Katara asked. "That was weird, it was like he was speaking words, but they didn't come out in any way that made sense."

"It wasn't just you." Aang replied with a sigh. "I don't think I've ever heard anyone talk for so long about nothing in my life. Honestly… what a waste of a fine morning."

"What a waste that we're gonna have to waste our whole afternoon as well." Sokka said with a sigh. "We're supposed to go well into the night, and we all know we'll get out a few hours late anyway."

"And then more meetings this whole week!" Toph finished. The Gaang sighed, commiserating together for a brief moment. After several moments, Toph spoke. "You guys… maybe we can make these meetings a bit more… interesting?"

"Interesting?" Aang asked. "Is there really something interesting enough to make these meetings interesting?"

"Sure there is! We just have to play a little game, is all." Toph said. "What if we all participated in a Dare-Off?"

They were all familiar with Dare-Offs, because they'd had at least one before, back when they were traveling during the war. But, they all still had no idea what they were getting into because they were all older, and slightly more evil than they were back then. "That just might do it." Aang commented. "How many chickens?"

"Didn't we do just one or two last time?" Sokka asked.

"Two." Katara answered. "But we should do more this time. How about four?" Everyone nodded in agreement. "And how about the same order? Me, Aang, Toph, and then Sokka?"

"But I think I should go first, Sugar Queen." Toph said. "I won last time."

Everyone agreed that this was acceptable. And so began the Gaang's Dare-Off!

"Okay, Toph, what do you want us to do?" Aang asked.

Toph paused thoughtfully. "I dare you, Sugar Queen, and Snoozles to attend the rest of the meeting in nothing but your underwear!"

No one spoke for a few seconds. In their last Dare-Off, a majority of the dares was just to either play pranks on other people or do silly things. They'd never had a dare like this before, and it was a good indication of the torture to come.

"Fine, I'll do it." Sokka said.

"Me too." Katara said. "I'm not losing a chicken this early in the game."

Aang hesitated the longest. Sure, when he was a boy, it wasn't too unusual for him to strip down to his underwear all the time. But that was before he hit puberty. Now he was painfully aware of his body and more prone to being shy about his looks. The thought of sitting in on those meetings practically naked was nearly torture to him. However, like Katara said, he'd gain nothing from losing a chicken so early. "I'll… do it." He said finally.

Toph laughed evilly, knowing that the afternoon was sure to be more entertaining than the morning.

The meeting was called back to order, and most of the people had returned. Zuko took his place, and glanced across the way at Toph, who was the only other one of the Gaang who was back so far. Was it just him, or did she seem entirely too happy?

Before Zuko could figure out what Toph was so happy about, the reason literally walked through the door and all conversation in the room stopped.

Aang, Sokka, and Katara had returned, sans most of their clothing. They only really had their underwear left on, and Zuko knew that the rest of the politicians were taken aback at getting a better look at Aang's tattoos than they ever imagined they would get.

Aang's face was nearly tomato red and, while it was harder to see on the Water Tribe siblings dark skin, Zuko could tell that they were embarrassed too. Without a word, they took their seats, arms crossed over their bodies in a vain attempt to hide.

"Um… Avatar Aang, Lady Katara, and Lord Sokka?" The Earth Kingdom windbag began nervously. "What happened to your…?"

The three exchanged looks and Aang spoke in a small, pitiful voice. "We were hot." At this Toph burst out into unrestrained laughter.

Clearly intent on just ignoring the situation, the Windbag began to speak. Everyone seemed to notice that he was a lot more at-ease as he spoke, and now his speech was making sense.

Maybe it is true that imagining (or in this case, having) your audience in their underwear really does help nervous speakers.

LES: Once again, I'm accepting dare requests and votes for the winner!