Title: Help wanted, position to be filled, inquire within.

Author: Loz

E-Mail: loz06@yahoo.com

Rating: PG

Category: CJ/Leo eventually

Series: No

Spoilers: Minor Season 1,2

Archive (if applicable): I guess.

Feedback: The good, the bad and the very ugly it's all appreciated.

A huge thank you to everyone who sent feedback on The Sheets say :0)

Summary: "Because I'm so old and everything and Mallory was an Immaculate Conception because Jenny and I never had sex."

Disclaimers: CJ and Leo together, you won't see that on television, so I guess they're not mine.


Carol arrived at her desk on an April Monday and up until that point nothing had been unusual, that is until she glanced at the notice taped to CJ's closed door.

Help wanted, Position to be filled Inquire within

Carol panicked casting her eyes over her desk looking for a letter of redundancy, it's not present, neither is there one in her email.

"Is there something I should know?" Carol stands in the doorway, her hand pressed on the notice, she could always be told to pack her bags and get out verbally.

"It's not your job Carol…." CJ laughs. "It's a…….personal position, you have nothing to worry about."

"Good CJ, because if there was something……"

"There is absolutely nothing Carol. Have you got my schedule, what am I doing today?"


Donna is next to read the notice, her hand remains mid-air on it's way to knocking on CJ's door. Perplexed she reads the notice and then knocks. She was only meant to drop something off, but she ends up staying longer.

"Are you getting a second assistant CJ?" she doesn't imagine for a moment that Carol is leaving.

"No it's……actually I'm glad you are here Donna, are you busy, does Josh know you're here?"

"Josh is on the Hill for another half hour and he doesn't know I'm here so you're good for an hour."

"Come in and shut the door."

"I'll tell you this from the outset Donna, so if you get freaked you can get up and leave without having wasted too much of your time…..I haven't had sex since before the campaign, I'm not

like in the habit of picking up strange me in a bar somewhere."

"Neither am I CJ and I haven't……well this is about you not me."

"I was reading last night if you haven't had sex in a couple of years you can re-virginise." Donna gives her a questioning look.

"Where did you read that."

"In a magazine as I was waiting at the checkout of the supermarket."

"How exactly does that work?" Donna asks chuckling.

"I don't know, do you forget how to do it or something, does something grow back?"

"I don't know I believe that."

"Me either."

"On the upside my first time was horrific, so any chance I have to wipe that one from the slate……."

"Yeah there's that."

"What's this got to do with the sign CJ?"

"I'm a thirty something virgin Donna, how can I live with that tag?"

"Oh my god your position to be filled is for a man."

"Well yes."

"That's discriminatory CJ."

"How is it ?"

"You basically have written, women need not apply."

"I can't help it that my sexual preference doesn't run to women."

"I want one of those signs for the back of my chair." Donna sighed standing up.

"Thanks Donna."

"No problems, have you had any inquiries yet?" she asks, door open.

"Not yet, but it's only a matter of time."


Toby is next to comment on her sign. There have been people in and out of her office all day, no one has inquired, perhaps even noticed, just simply too busy going about their jobs.

"I'm not sure you can hire staff without going through Leo first CJ."

"I'm sorry?" she looks up at him unsure of his context.

"Help required, position available, when did you appoint yourself Chief of Staff?"

"I, oh yeah, I'm going to talk to Leo about it later."

"I'm going there now, I'll give him a heads up."

"No don't Toby."

"CJ, when you started here and they asked you if you'd ever tried to overthrow the government, should they have given you a follow up question of do you plan to in the near future ?"



CJ is fully expecting Leo when Josh struts into her office holding the sign from her door.

"Forget the rest, I'm your man CJ." He's wearing that stupid grin.

"I'm arrogant, hostile and antagonistic and I can start right away."

If only he knew how much he wasn't what she was looking for.

"Is there something you wanted Josh." She snatches the notice from his hands walking towards him, thus making him step backwards towards her door.

"The job."

"Positions filled." She says shutting the door on his face.

A couple of minutes later once he's gone, she hangs the notice out again.


"Hi, care to explain what you are doing?" CJ spins her chair around to come face-to-face with Leo.

"It's not what it seems."

"I'm thinking that because despite the crappy day I've had, I can't imagine you doing something like this without consulting me. How many papers is it in? National?"

"It's not in any media Leo."

"So you're promoting from within again?"


"Perhaps you'd like to explain then."

"Perhaps it would be healthiest for both of us if we just dropped it."

"Probably, but I'm up for everything bad in one day and the rest of the week to run smoothly."

"Then you should sit down."

"It's * always * good news when someone says that." He sits in the guest chair.

"It's just it's about sex and not being with anyone for a while and I wasn't sure………."

"Because I'm so old and everything and Mallory was an Immaculate Conception because Jenny and I never had sex."

"I….I don't know what to say in reply to that." CJ was dumbfounded.

"This position wouldn't be for a date for you would it?"

"That's maybe a nice way of saying it."

"Put this away, out of my sight and the Press'. " he waves the notice at her.

He leaves it on her desk on the way out.


"Hey CJ." Sam hurries to walk alongside her through the hallway.


"Toby told me you were hiring someone extra to help you out, if Leo was going for it I'd love someone else in communications."

"How long has it been since you slept with Laura?"

"Laurie. 18 months." Sam couldn't see the relevancy of the question.

"Yeah, you don't need someone in the position I'm advertising for." CJ leaves it at that and leaves Sam in the corridor utterly confused.


Later that night CJ is packing to go home as she takes the notice down from her door.

"Is the position filled?" Leo says from Carol's office, she didn't notice him arrive.

"No applicants, no one realises it's the job that it is."

"They'd be lined up down Pennsylvania Avenue if they did."

"Not likely."

"I'd like to throw my hat in the ring."

CJ freezes for a moment and then turns and looks at him.

"I have a very good résumé. I've been married and had a child so I'm experienced."

For the second time today CJ doesn't know what to say. She doesn't think anyone can deny that Leo is a good-looking man. He's got his tan suit on that matches his colouring so well. But she's never entertained the idea of feelings for him.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained she tells herself. If it was one night she's professional enough to look him in the eye the next day and work under him day in day out.. If it becomes more than that, well she'd deal with that circus when it came to town.

"There's an audition." She tells him putting the notice back on her desk.

"I thought I was well credentialled."

"It's pretty standard, nothing someone with your references need worry about."

"What does it entail ?"

"You kissing me?"

"All right then." About now CJ takes a big gulp of air, like it is to be her last.

She finds herself bending down to him faster than he moves up to her, so they don't quite meet in the middle. She's not sure why she moved so fast, perhaps because she wanted him or perhaps because she hasn't done this in a long time.

He's soft and gentle and there is something oddly comforting and familiar about him although

they've never done this before.

At any rate, "You've got the job." She tells him.

"Wanna come back to my place?" he reaches up to kiss her again.

She grabs her things and follows him out.


It's early when Donna gets in the next morning, she couldn't sleep. It's very early. She's there to see Leo and CJ walk in together and she can't help but think this doesn't happen everyday as often CJ arrives after her.

"Good morning CJ."

"Good morning Donna."

"How goes the employee hunting?"

"Positions filled." She leaves Donna outside her office in the hallway, like so many other people this week.


When Donna returns from lunch later in the day she finds a note from CJ.

Donna, Thought you might appreciate this, worked a charm for me. You could say it's one very effective pick up line.


Neatly folded inside the envelope was the notice from CJ's door.

Donna immediately went searching for tape so that she might attach the notice to the back of her chair.


Donna saw CJ walk out of the West Wing alone that night.

"So you and Leo and the sign?" Donna caught up with her and asked once they were out of earshot.

"I have no comment except to say that the circus may soon be coming to town." with that CJ strode off.

Squinting Donna thought she could see Leo ahead of them at the main gates.