AN: Really sorry about that 2 month wait. Got totally killed by work for a bit.
Blaine was in a state of shock, just as he had been for the past 3 hours. Just as he had been since Kurt had walked up to him, held his face between his hands and kissed him. Since he had held his face between his hands, kissed him and then ran away. Literally ran away. Turned tail, fled the bathroom and sprinted down the corridor as fast as his perfectly toned legs could carry him. Which, as it turned out, was a hell of a lot faster than Blaine's untrained ones could manage. He had barely made it halfway down the hall before slumping against the wall, chest heaving as he watched Kurt disappear around the corner.
And now here he sat, alone in his bedroom (like usual), skipping out on his afternoon classes (definitely not like usual), desperately willing Kurt to pick up his phone or answer his texts or something, anything, just so he had some clue as to what the hell was going on.
He flopped backwards onto his bed,arms splayed out beside him dramatically.
How was this his life?
If a few weeks ago someone had told him that he would kiss, no, be kissed by the most beautiful, talented, popular boy in school, and more than just that, that they would actually get along; laugh and joke and tease each other, he would have told them they were crazy.
And now? Now he was beginning to think he must be the one who was crazy.
Kurt had kissed him. Just minutes after it being very publically announced that he had a boyfriend. A hot, college-going boyfriend, apparently. Why on gods-green-earth would Kurt want to kiss him when he had a guy like that he could be making out with?
And wow, did the thought of Kurt making out with someone else, someone infinitely better than him, hurt a hell of a lot more than he would ever have imagined. His chest ached with it.
He flung his arm over his face and growled in frustration.
He wasn't prepared to deal with this; emotionally, socially…his life so far had prepared him for homework and college and getting a good job; not for flirting and jealousy and…and kissing.
God, even just thinking about it made him blush. He was such loser. He didn't have the slightest hint of a clue how to kiss someone. No wonder Kurt had got the hell out of dodge. He was probably awful at it, embarrassingly bad. And Kurt was probably off somewhere laughing with his…his boyfriend… about him. How could he have even entertained the idea that he was good enough for Kurt Hummel?
And now he was going to have to go back to school tomorrow, and not only would he not have his lessons with Kurt to look forward to, but he was going to have to face everyone after he had been publically humiliated and ran away in tears. And probably get detention for skipping classes.
He felt the tell-tale sting of tears behind his eyes.
It served him right, he supposed, for every believing he deserved anything more.
Kurt dropped his bag by the door and trudged towards the kitchen. He slumped down in the first chair he came to and dropped his head into his hands.
'You're home late. Cheerios or tutoring?' Burt called out his shoulder.
Hearing Kurt's dejected tone, Burt turned around, shocked to see him so upset. Kurt didn't elucidate further, but Burt knew that he really needed to talk. He also knew that if he didn't play this right he could very easily cause him to clam up completely.
'Bad day?' He asked cautiously.
Kurt lifted his head slowly.
'Dad, I think…I'm…am I a horrible person?'
'What? Burt's eyebrows raised in confusion, 'where's this coming from?'
'I just…when did I get like this, dad? When did I care more about being popular, about getting some meaningless texts from people I don't even like than actually being nice? Than doing well at school and trying to actually make something of myself?'
'Don't be so hard on yourself, kid,' Burt said softly, sitting himself down beside Kurt. 'It's nice to be popular, intoxicating. You're not the first to get drawn in by it.'
'But it's like I'm not even myself any more. You can't say you haven't noticed it. We used to be close and I barely even talk to you anymore.'
'Kurt, I'm gonna ask you a question and I want you to be honest, ok.'
Kurt looked up, unsure, but nodded anyway.
'Does this have anything to do with Blaine?'
Kurt's eyes widened in surprise. How was it that obvious to someone else when he had barely even realised it himself? 'Well,' he thought, 'guess it's time to finally be honest with myself.'
'I… think I like him, dad,' he started quietly. 'He's sweet and so smart and actually kind of funny once he gets past his adorable social awkwardness,' he said with a fond smile. 'I just…the way they treat him in school. How have I never seen it before? They're so awful to him and I've never even noticed. Or, no, that's not true, I've noticed, I just didn't care. What kind of person does that make me?'
'It makes you a teenager, Kurt, a teenager who made a few wrong choices. Everyone makes mistakes and the fact that you know what yours are and what to change is a good thing, a great thing.'
'But that's just the thing, dad. I know I've been awful and I want to change, I really do, but…' he trailed off, waving his hand in the air as if that would magically make the words appear for him.
'But you're scared?' Burt supplied instead. 'You don't want to give up the popularity and go back to how things were before? Don't want to risk you becoming the school target instead of Blaine?'
Kurt gave a rueful smile.
'Yep, yep and yep. What do I do, dad? I don't know if I'm strong enough to deal with all of that again. It was horrible.'
Burt sighed, trailing his hand over his head. When did parenting get so hard? He missed diapers and scraped knees. At a loss for what to say, he decided to change tac.
'What happened today, Kurt? What brought all this on?'
'Blaine and I were fooling around in the library… not like that, jeez, dad,' he said, blushing beet red at his father's expression. 'Just, ya know, joking, messing around. Anyway, Santana saw and she came up and started screaming at Blaine, really ripping into him, and everyone was just crowding round and laughing. And he was looking at me with those damn eyes, and he looked so upset and just pleading with me to say something so he wasn't just standing there alone, and I couldn't do it, I just couldn't. And he looked like I'd completely betrayed him. And he ran off and then some arsehole tripped him up. I mean, was it not bad enough that he'd just been humiliated in front of everyone, they had to go and physically hurt him on top of it all. I used to call these people my friends; I used to laugh when they did stuff like that. What was wrong with me?'
'What did you do this time?' Burt asked quietly.
'I went after him. I mean, he was crying and bleeding and no-one was doing anything. I couldn't just leave him there.'
'Well it seems to me like you've made your choice, Kurt. And I have to say, I've never been prouder of you. I'm not saying it's going to be easy, but you're strong and proud, and smart when you actually put your mind to it. Blaine's been a good influence on you and I think you've probably been a good influence on him too; he could barely meet my eyes first time he was round here, now he's all smiles and jokes. I think maybe you two were made for each other.'
'Made for each other.' Kurt ran the words through his head. 'Made for each other.'
Yeh, he liked the sound of that.
Sorry it's so bitty...you can kind of tell that it was written over 2 months...