I know...I should be working on Harry Potter book 2, and I am! But I couldn't help writing this one, it wouldn't leave me alone until it was out of my head and on it's way to you. Besides book two is coming along nicely though things are progressing a bit faster than I thought they would and twists keep popping in my head that weren't there in the beginning- suffice to say that book 2 now has eight chapters and Harry has only just made it to Hogwarts. Readers will have to forgive me but I'm struggling to get book two to fall into line the way I want it to-
Now for this story: Well lets see, think of it as a treat. It actually isn't one that I've had in my archives forever, it's fresh. It kind of spilled out of my fingers last night and I managed to finish it just now- yes that means that insomnia strikes again, but I'm rather proud of this bit. Hope you enjoy it!
NOT FOR THE EYES OF CHILDREN!
None of these characters are mine
You are now officially responsible for choosing to continue reading.
Let me know what you think!
He is watching…as he always is, a shadow behind a willow dark eyes glittering strangely as they stare down at him. A hand grasps his and he feels empty, disgusted by it, but he can't say no, it's too late. In his fear of the great terrifyingly vast future and the realization that he would be traveling it alone he clung to the last memory he knew of. He didn't love her, not this way, not in any way really- he wasn't even sure he could love. Voldemort's horcrux had not gone without a fight and it had taken a part of Harry with it. There was a gaping hole where his heart used to be. He couldn't even muster up the tears needed to burry his friends and loved ones. He glances towards the knowing gaze and drops her hand. He is the only thing he cries for any more, and the man isn't even as dead as he should be. Stark white bandages wrap around his neck allowing vivid pink to show around the edges.
Worry fills him.
You should be in the hospital.
He does not say it out loud; he does not speak unless he must any more. But there was never really any need for words between them. Even the hateful ones once spat back and forth were dry and empty, crumbling leaves of the past.
Pale lips twitch upwards in a slight sneer.
I'm stronger then that Potter.
Harry can't help but smile slightly his eyes checking over the thin form any way. The hand grasps his and tugs at him. Tear filled blue eyes glare up at him and he realizes that the funeral is over.
It is blank and empty and he wishes desperately that he could feel something. But Voldemort's taken that away from him, and no one else seems to understand it. He can't feel. Sighing he glanced back towards the shadowy tree but he is gone.
Three weeks fly by him. Wedding plans are made, rings and robes and flowers are bought though by whom or how he has no clue, he never had any say in any of it. The next thing he knows he is standing in front of a mirror alone in a white room five minuets from his own wedding having not a clue as to how he's arrived there. The robes he's wearing seem foreign to him, like they don't belong or rather, like he doesn't belong. A sense of wrongness fills him but he can't put it to words. He will marry Ginny, because if he doesn't he will be alone- he will become an Auror because he can do nothing else. He doesn't feel happy, but he doesn't feel unhappy either, just…numb.
Next he knows he is standing in front of the alter confused as to how he got there. There are people all around him beaming up at him or dabbing their eyes but he feels nothing, there is nothing…nothing at all. The door opens and gasps ring through the air. He expects to lift his head and see Ginny made up and dressed in white- instead he finds furious black eyes glinting at him and all those around him. He cannot bear that look, but he doesn't know what to do. How can he ask the man to do this? The man who has already done so much for him, sacrificed so much for his sake. But those dark eyes are glittering and the chin lifts in challenge.
Harry feels himself tremble. There are shouts of fury and mumbles and anger all around the man but dark eyes are on him now and lips are drawn into a thin familiar line.
It repeats and Snape is looking directly at him. Harry swallows his body trembling. He doesn't know what's going on, he's slipping through time and has no control, he's numb and broken, a doll strung up for the amusement of the masses. His eyes fall shut and there are no words needed between them, not really. It's all there, sitting in the silence.
Help me, please!
And then he is falling like the strings have been cut and there is nothing left to hold him up.
When he next wakes he is in the hospital wing. One glance at the man beside him tells him all he needs to know.
An impassive gaze.
The wedding is off. Ginny and the Weasley's are furious- but not at him, not really, not once they understood what had happened. How could they be? In the wake of understanding that he was not quite whole any more? That it wasn't just grief that had caused those long silences and endless empty eyed stares. Molly even felt as if she'd taken advantage of him somehow. He wondered what they were going to do now. Apathy made it impossible for him to live really, he would never be happy or sad, he would never be thrilled or angry. Nothing he'd do would allow him to feel satisfied. He was a doll. A whisper of the boy who'd once fought so bravely.
Hush Potter we will fix you.
It takes him a moment to realize that all this time he has been sharing his thoughts with the man. There is no need for magic here. The man had shared his last most intimate moments with him and had entrusted him with his most coveted memories in their rawest of forms. Harry could remember that night clearly. He could remember begging the man not to die, could remember blood stained hands as the body went lax. He'd mourned. He'd run desperately through a sea of bodies in a haze of confusion to see what memories those precious few tears held.
Amidst all his confusion and his blind need to protect what was left of a man he presumed dead he'd drunk the bitter memories so that they would become one with him. So that deepest most desperate part of the man would be protected inside of him never to be harmed or violated again. Those tears had stained him more vibrantly than the slowly drying blood on his trembling hands. How was he to know that Narcissa in her gratitude for the life of her only son had gone back and pulled Snape from the brink of death? How was he to know that by consuming those tears he'd created an unbreakable bond between them?
A bond that would pull Snape back to life, and then a few short hours later himself as well. It was only irony that Narcissa was the one to help him damaged as he was. The horcrux had done what Dumbledore had intended for it to do though. It made Harry unable to care, gave him the emptiness he needed to be able to kill Voldemort, to cast the killing curse with pure raw apathy and a wellspring of magic that spilled through him from an infuriated Hogwarts. He was a conduit and nothing more, even after the dust had settled and tears shed- the problem was that no one seemed to notice.
Harry blinked slowly and realized that Snape had moved a few inches. Pomphrey was staring at him in shock a food tray in her hands.
"I've been trying to get through to him for weeks! Had to feed him through spells, I was afraid I'd have to call Saint Mungos!" She said shaking her head. Harry blinked slowly and looked at Snape.
Snape looked at him for a long cautious moment before nodding.
I've been gone, looking for a cure.
Sure enough the bandages on the man's neck were gone and there was an air around him that spoke of stale earth and wild wind. Belatedly Harry realized that he must have drifted off again. If he could feel he supposed he would be frightened by this.
Hush Harry I'm not going to let you fade.
Harry blinked and realized that small anxious sounds were spilling from his lips. Was he afraid? He didn't feel it, he was numb.
"Harry?" Pomphrey said gently. He slowly slid his gaze towards her and she settled the tray on the bed in front of him. For a long moment he simply stared at it.
You don't know what to do, do you?
Snape's question was sad and Harry nodded causing the man to look slightly pained.
It's getting worse…isn't it?
He tried, the half formed thought hardly making it. Snape purse his lips and his eyes glittered.
Eat Harry, pick up your spoon- yes like that, dip it into the soup. Very good carefully-
And that was it, Snape guided him through the meal as time and time again he forgot who he was, where he was and what a spoon was regardless of the fact it all seemed so familiar. He focused as hard as he could on Snape's words but he felt tired- so tired. And dimly he realized that his fingers had gone limp the spoon falling from them with a clatter. Snape sighed and it seemed so far away.
And then he was dimly aware that he was no longer aware of anything. Was he going to die like this? Was he going to be trapped in this wilting body forever? Should that frighten him? Should what frighten him? Thoughts, absent and ill formed flitted through him at random. Memories, wishes made long ago and then forgotten.
The familiar voice called to him and he struggled to pay attention.
That's it Harry almost there.
Yes…almost there, but where he didn't know. He didn't care either so he moved towards it, whatever it was.
Good Harry, good.
And then there was warmth, something that enveloped him and ran through him with starling clarity, it prodded and pulled until he felt as if he were being torn in two. There was a blast of expression dots and fire and rain and wind it was all around him surrounding him clouding him bringing him and sending him…and then nothing, a brief echoing moment of nothing…floating….weightless, without thought or conscious effort…and then everything. He opened his mouth as it entered a whirlwind of thought and emotion and everything-
His scream broke the air.
When it ended he was staring raggedly into dark glittering eyes his chest heaving from the effort to breath. And it was there…emotion. Tears and laughter spilled from him at once as he trembled in fear and excitement and relief until Snape could press a calming drought to his lips which he nearly choked on because he was hyperventilating. As the warm calm spilled through his limbs relaxing him he heaved slowly, clutching at his chest as tears spilled hot down his cheeks.
He begged. He was so certain that he was going to die; he hadn't resurfaced in so long. Snape's lips curled up and a hand settled on his cheek in a tender manner. He realized that he could pull away from it and blamed it on the bond and his confusion when he didn't. Slowly Snape guided his chin towards the side of the bed where a little boy was sitting with large expressive eyes.
Meet Teddy Lupin, your godson.
Harry's eyes widened. The last time he'd seen this child Teddy had been a babe in his arms. Tears stung his eyes and grief stole him at the thought of Remus and Tonks clutching each others hand's clinging desperately to each other even in death.
"Teddy!" He gasped the halted rough word spilling from his dry unused throat like a prayer. The wide brilliant smile that met him sent him reeling.
Teddy has a rare condition- for years the healers couldn't identify it. It was only when I met him that I understood. It seems Nymphadora was supposed to have twins- one of them didn't make it, the half formed child's soul attached it's self to it's sibling, incomplete and nearly undetectable. Teddy was more than willing to give this to you.
Harry's hand trembled as it lifted and settled against his chest where the once cold spot was warm and pulsing. More tears spilled from his eyes and Teddy giggled. A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips.
Who has he been living with? His grandparents?
He asked silently. Dark eyes dampened and Harry knew without speaking that they were dead.
Rogue death eaters.
Snape answered the unasked question. Harry felt a brief pang.
Snape looked away and Harry could swear there was a bit of pink in the man's cheeks. He smiled a bit and tears spilled once more this time in gratitude. Snape smiled slightly in response and shifted awkwardly. It was then that Harry realized that the man was still crouched over him slender pale fingers settled against the hallow of his neck. A pleasant masculine smell washed over him and he sighed into it without noticing what he was doing. When his eyes finally snapped open he was inches from Snape's face. His own face heated strangely and he looked away. Teddy glanced between them and belatedly Harry realized that Teddy was far older than his mind said he should be. Fear stole over him again.
Came the dreadful answer. He'd been like that for six years; six years of his life were lost to him, gone forever. He didn't resist when Teddy's arms came up and wrapped around him in a comforting manner.
Life was anything but normal after this. Slowly he was rehabilitated forcing his body through painful physical therapy was friends that looked too old drifted in to visit him looking at him as if he were a stranger, as if he might break. Perhaps he would have, if it hadn't been for Snape's and Teddy's presence.
Ginny had tired of waiting for him after the second year, she'd moved on, married and was now pregnant with her third child. She wasn't bitter; in fact she was happy, happier than she would have been if they'd gone through with that farce of a wedding.
Molly and Arthur welcomed him back with open arms, but Harry was very aware that when they looked at him, they could only see Ron. They stopped visiting after the first week, and Harry didn't blame them.
Hermione he discovered had left the wizarding world for good. The war had changed her, it had changed them all. When he sent her a letter explaining everything that had happened it returned to him tearstained and unopened. He understood, so he stopped writing.
Fred Weasley was one of the last to visit him. He spoke quietly, subdued in a way that was nearly frightening. The man before him was a mere shadow of the boy he'd once been. He told him that he'd closed the shop- it had been too painful to keep open and George's death made any joke seem some how cheap. Harry saw emptiness in the man's eyes and couldn't help the tears he shed for his fallen comrade. Fred was living a half life now, and he always would. Harry was unsurprised when he didn't visit again.
Neville and Luna were the last to visit him. They were moving to Spain soon but they swore they'd write- Harry knew that they would. They needed to get away though, to move on from this haunted place, from the memories of people long gone. From the new buildings that had taken the place of old buildings- as if the war hadn't happened, as if the world could just move on.
In the end he was alone, as he suspected he would be. The future was vast and frightening and it took all of his willpower to get through each day. Teddy helped of course- and Severus who could no longer remain Snape when Harry found himself gazing at the man for long spans of time, lost in the man's scent or in a curious angle of his chin or a shadow caressing his cheek. Severus and Teddy lived in the castle, Severus having returned to teaching potions would often leave Teddy with him. Teddy who was sweet and mild tempered like his father, yet at times bore a completely mischievous glint in his eyes that identified him as Tonks child more than the random bouts of clumsiness or the constantly changing hair color.
Six years and four months after he'd lost touch with the world Harry made the long and arduous trip down to the dungeons. He'd already informed headmistress McGonagall of his intentions and had received nothing more than a quirk of her lips and a small curt nod, he was completely unsurprised to find Snape's quarters sporting an additional room when he finally managed to slip into the man's chambers. Teddy grinned up at him mischievously and Harry couldn't help but smirk slightly in response as he made himself familiar with what would become his home.
He was lying on his stomach on the hearth rug with Teddy, surrounded by primary books and studying materials when the man finally strode through the floo. Severus had stood there for a long moment simply taking in the sight a look on his face that Harry couldn't help but discern.
His own lips curled upwards in response and heat curled through his belly. He watched in fascination as the man's lips opened. He'd regained his voice, the low sensual quality it had once boasted and the seductive dulcet tones that Harry clung to were rare since they needed no words between them, but Severus knew he loved to hear them any way.
"Harry…" The name spilled from the man's lips like a prayer and Harry shivered slightly from the pleasure of it. Teddy grinned and hummed slightly as he dropped his gaze back down to his school work content in his part of the mischief making. Harry smiled slightly up at the man and caught the silent plea in the man's eyes. They didn't need words, but when they spoke them, each one was precious and cherished.
"Severus." He said softly his own voice having deepened into something more melodious. "Welcome home." He said smiling widely. The man's breath was caught in his throat. Home. He would have Harry here to welcome him from now on…Harry blushed as the thought skittered loudly through the air and vowed that he would welcome the man home every day from now on. Suddenly the future didn't look so terrifying. Severus seemed to catch that thought and frowned slightly. Harry couldn't help but dart his gaze away.
Look at me.
He was powerless to refuse. Dark eyes glittered in question.
Do you trust me?
The answer was swift and without hesitation.
Dark eyes glittered in unspoken emotion.
Then do not fear the future, I will take care of everything.
And just like that Harry's fear melted away. If Severus said that he would take care of everything- then he would and there was nothing to worry about. He smiled thinly and nodded.
Heat flared through dark eyes before they darted away. And just like that it began. Harry would wake up with a list of things to do written out neatly for him, he would do them without question and by the time he'd done them all Severus would be returning. The man would look him over, then the list, and smiled proudly at him. It was all he really needed- well, almost all he needed. He couldn't ignore the heat that flared between them, neither of them could really, but he was frightened- not of Severus, not of being with him, but of himself. He looked into those eyes and knew that he could lose himself to them, knew that he would break if they ever looked away.
One week after he began living with Severus and Teddy Severus finally made his move. No words were needed between him and Teddy. They never were. But the quiet soothed them and in a flash Teddy was clutching his books and flooing up to the headmistress' office. Harry knew the instant that dark eyes landed on him that he was well and truly lost to them. It was frightening and exhilarating at the same time.
"Do you trust me?" Harry was leaned toward the sound of the man's voice before he could directly understand what was being said. His heart thudded in his chest.
"Yes." He said bravely, somehow knowing that this would change something between them- something utterly terrifying that could possibly complete him in a way that he'd never known. That heat was back in Severus' gaze and he trembled with it.
"Kneel." And Harry did, before he knew what he was doing he did and once he was there knelt on the floor gazing up at the man then he knew he would never come to regret this. Severus moved closer ever graceful and prowling, ever strong and sure where Harry was weak and frightened. He realized that he was trembling, that he was weeping and Severus cupped his cheek gently. "I would have everything from you Harry." He whispered softly his gaze solemn. "There will be times when you will be frightened of this, of what I give and take from you but I know what it is that you need. I know what you crave in the deepest reaches of your mind, I know what you need and I will give it to you. I will be harsh at times, cruel and I will be gentle, kind." Harry shuddered and leaned into the hand cradling his cheek while the other slid through his hair before gripping and tugging back sharply drawing a cry from him.
"I know how to blur the lines between pleasure and pain just as well as you know how to blur the lines between love and hate…" He trailed his fingers across Harry's lips sensually and Harry felt them part naturally craving something he didn't fully understand- but Severus knew, he always knew.
The thought was oddly comforting.
Severus swallowed and his fingers twitched slightly against his lips. "Harry…" He breathed reverently. If you agree to this you must agree to being mine and mine alone, for the rest of your life, I cannot bear the loss of another loved one." He whispered passionately. Harry knew, he understood. Severus was giving him a chance that could destroy him, he was risking it all- for Harry. Again. He was brought back to that moment as he stood by the alter empty, void, an uncertain future and a loveless marriage before him. It took him a moment to understand that he was crying openly tears dripping from his face leaving scalding trails behind that quickly chilled in the dungeon air.
"How can I ask this of you?" He managed grasping the hand on his cheek and nuzzling it reverently. "You've sacrificed so much for me already-"
"Then let me have this." Severus said his eyes a heated torrent of passion. "This is all I will ever ask of you but you are under no obligation to accept it. I need this as much as you do Harry, I need to hold, to command and demand I need to control! For once in my life I want to be in control! I want to be the possessor not the possessed! I want to be the one that is knelt before but I will not have it unless it is willing!" He ground out begging him to understand with his eyes. And Harry did understand. It was with dawning curiosity that he realized that Severus understood something about him as well.
"You know what I need?" He asked cautiously, pleading the man with his eyes. A slow smile spread across the man's lips.
"All your life you have been held accountable for your own actions and the results of the actions taken by those around you. You never had a soul to hold you when you needed it and yet you still gave and gave and gave. Your life was built upon the expectations of everyone around you and now that you are no longer bound by them you are lost." He said softly his fingers sliding gently through his hair. Harry swallowed and leaned into the caress longingly. "I can see it Harry, you would give anything, anything at all to have someone take over, take the responsibility out of your hands. You would gladly bow to one who would offer to take care of you- to really take care of you, and Merlin….Merlin you would love them." He said his voice breaking. Harry sighed his eyes looking up at the man his ears greedy for those words. They rang true. It was more than a simple longing, he needed it. Severus smiled slightly as Harry looked up at him eyes wide and longing. Carefully he reached into his cloak and pulled out a large square jeweler's box covered in supple black leather.
"Severus?" Harry said softly, curiously his eyes wide and so very open to him. Severus leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to the spot between the boy's eyes.
"I am going to walk out of this room Harry; I will be gone for an hour. If you decide that this is what you want, what you truly want then when I return you will kneel before me and offer this up to me with both hands palms up. If not-" His voice faltered a bit and Harry could see the slight fear in the man's eyes. "If not then you will set it on the kitchen table and we will not speak of it again is that understood?" He said softly. Harry nodded slowly and reached up grasping the box with both hands feeling its weight. Severus was gone an instant later his entire form tense as he slipped through the floo.
The box felt so heavy.
He caressed the leather with trembling fingers and a reverent gaze before reaching deep inside himself for the courage he needed to open it. His breath caught and stuck in his throat. He nearly threw the thing away from him in terror. It was like a creeping dream he didn't know he had sitting in front of him a waking nightmare. He was unaware of the time that passed as he stared down at the thing. Nestled in a bed of deep blue velvet sat a wide leather band.
His fingers reached out of their own violation and he gasped at the softness of it, the texture he could willingly imagine wrapped around his neck. Yes. This was what he needed. He trailed his fingers over the gentle rise of the unforgiving buckle and caught sight of the small silver disk. A tag.
Property of Severus Snape
His breath caught in his throat and he began to envision what Severus had spoken to him about earlier.
You will kneel before me and offer this up to me…
His breathing was erratic his heart's tempo quick and irregular.
You will kneel before me…
I would have everything from you Harry.
I know what you crave in the deepest reaches of your mind…
I know what you need and I will give it to you.
Do you trust me?
Harry felt calm steal over him a slow and heady drug. It spread through his limbs and released him from whatever fear he'd been caught up in. He loved Severus Snape, he'd come to terms with that a long time ago. He trusted Severus Snape. He'd come to terms with that as well. And this. He lifted the collar and found satisfaction in the weight that had only moments ago seemed far from comforting. He rubbed his fingers across the elegantly etched words.
Property of Severus Snape
There was no doubt in his mind what he wanted- needed. Slowly he lifted his hands the leather settled on his palms and waited. Anticipation flowed through him, he clung to it. There would never again be a time when he feared being lonely. Severus would keep him for the rest of his life and Harry knew, he knew that he would serve him and love him for the rest of his life. Severus would never let him go hungry; he would never leave him to flounder through a situation untrained and without anything to keep him from making the wrong decision. If he wanted to he could live out the rest of his life content to never take the reins again.
As the floo flared to life something in his soul settled.
Severus hesitated, his breath catching in his throat audibly as he stared at him for a long moment wondering if he would flee. But Harry's resolve was steady and his gaze sure as he slowly looked up at the man baring to him the love and trust he held there. Dark eyes drank in the sight of him for long moments before he finally moved his strides certain his eyes alight with a flame that caused Harry's breath to hitch in his chest.
And then he was there kneeling before him lifting his chin with a smooth knuckle and breathing a kiss across his trembling lips.
"Mine." He said darkly and Harry let out a keen as arousal shot through him at the whispered word.
"Y-Yours." He managed with a shiver. His body was relaxed, open, Snape could do anything to him now and he knew it, and he relished it, bathed in the arousal it brought on. Severus lifted the collar from his hands and smoothed warm fingers across his bared neck guiding it forward which Harry allowed unresisting. The texture of the cool leather was like ambrosia to his skin and he moaned softly as it settled just below his Adams apple and tugged slightly at the skin as it was buckled. Severus' fingers trembled as they linger there, at the base of his neck touching around the edges. Harry lifted his hand shakily and caressed the front of it amazed at how right it felt. Severus lifted his chin gently and looked into his eyes. They needed no words, not really. But they said them any way.
"My Harry…" Severus breathed.
"Yours Severus." Harry assured. A finger settled over his lips and he shivered. No, that wasn't what the man before him wanted to hear.
"My Harry…" The man said softly. Harry pressed his face into the hand that held him.
"Yours Master." Harry said watching the heat flare to life in dark eyes.
"Again." He demanded sharply his nail dragging across his bottom lip roughly. Harry sighed into it.
"Master." He said letting his mouth drop open as he had done before. Snape's finger pressed inside and Harry laved at it as if he were starving nipping curiously at it. Suddenly Severus was surrounding him arms a solid wall of support his chest the protection Harry needed.
"Mine!" Severus murmured against his lips before claiming them. Harry gasped at the sudden onslaught and sighed into the kiss letting it burn him coaxing a slow and steady fire in him until he was burning for more. A wet muscle pressed at the seam of his lips and Harry opened willingly begging for more with a low keen that was swallowed up and greeted with a growl that left him clinging as his mouth was claimed, mapped out learned intimately with sweeping caresses. He panted sharply and his hands gripped blindly at the folds of Severus' robes. Severus tore away from him with a gasp and Harry had only an instant to breath before he was being lifted, swept up, as if he weighed nothing more than a pillow but cradled so gently that it nearly hurt.
"Master…" He hissed loving the taste of the new word on his lips as Severus halted and gazed down at him eyes aflame with something unstoppable. Harry could tell without words that it took all of Severus' impressive willpower not to simply drop him on the floor and ravish him there. The knowledge left him panting his arousal obvious in his flushed cheeks and short desperate breaths. Severus gaze became heavy lidded and dark eyes gazed at him for a moment taking in the sight of him memorizing the moment knowing that he would remember it for years to come. "Please?" Harry begged realizing that the man hadn't moved and wouldn't move without prompting. It seemed though that the plea was all he needed. An instant later they were sweeping through the doorway and he was being settled against the bed hands tearing at his robes with a violence that was nearly frightening. His shirt ripped away and he hardly breathed in a gasp before he was naked, bare and panting under a dark eyed gaze that raked over him possessively lingering for a moment on the leather around his neck. Hands slide up his chest and across his collarbones each digit a fiery brand.
"Say it again Harry." Severus panted his eyes glittering, begging, demanding. Harry's breath caught in his throat.
"Yours Master, all yours." He whispered letting out a strangled sound and gripping the sheets in his hands as nails raked down his chest leaving stripes of marks that tingled and itched and burned. Severus followed them back up with apologetic tenderness bending down to press his mouth against the sting.
"Yes, mine." Severus whispered against him the rumbling growl of his sensual voice sending thrills of pleasure across his sensitive skin. Harry arched with a cry and Snape chuckled lowly against him eyes burning hands gentle lips and teeth rough and claiming until he was nothing more than a writhing mess. "You wouldn't bow for them, wouldn't call him master- no never." Severus whispered staring up into his wide glazed eyes as his tongue snaked out and circled his nipple fingers moving to toy with the other leaving him shuddering and mewling. Some part of his mind told him that Severus wanted affirmation.
"No never-ah! My M-Master is better than them-oh! Please..." A hand wound around him settling against his lower back a warm reassurance as long tapered fingers wrapped around him firmly unmoving and yet there tormenting him. He shuddered and let out a sob.
"Mine only, say it." Severus demanded his voice tugging at the tight coil inside of him as fingers teased his hardness with gentle barely there caresses.
"Yours!" Harry said arching of the bed. "Yours only!" He sobbed. "Please Master, Severus please! He reached out hesitantly his hands trembling. He knew he shouldn't touch himself, no that was for Severus, but it was all so surreal and he wanted, Merlin he wanted! Trembling fingertips trailed over Severus cheekbones and inky lashes fluttered closed mouth parting slightly. The hand around his length reached up and grasped his pulling it to parted lips and slipping the first two fingers into the wet cavern. Harry shuddered and watched with wide eyes as they were devoured laved nipped at sending shocks of pleasure to his system. Dark eyes watched him for responses before slowly with a slick wet noise each finger was pulled out.
"Spread your legs Harry." Severus said softly tight with restraint, control. Harry trembled and did as he was told flushing in embarrassment as dark eyes raked him again flaring at the red stripes and lurid teeth marks before settling where they most wanted to be. A single pale finger- not his, his hand was still clutched in the other elegant hand glistening slightly in the dim light. A single finger settled against the tip of his arousal and pressed down briefly before with slow deliberation circling the wet crown and sliding down the underside. Harry cried out as a nail edged across the vein and trembled as it passed his sack. He let out a silent gasp as the finger pressed down briefly again sending a jolt of pleasure through him making him dizzy with it. Slowly it edged farther back until it was resting against the twitching entrance. Harry was shaking he wasn't sure how much more of this he could take, he wanted the man, needed him.
"Please…Please master…" He begged his voice little more than breathy pants intermingled with mewling as he pressed down desperately. Dark eyes lifted up and the nail scraped around his hole- once…twice….three times. He begged the man with his eyes as he muttered incoherently. Severus leaned down and pressed a kiss to his navel his finger still scraping around in maddening circles. Harry let out a broken sob as a clever tongue slipped into his navel and swirled around before darting back so that teeth could nip and tug at the flesh around it.
"Watch me." The low gravelly voice sent his eyes fluttering open unaware that they'd closed at all. Severus leaned down further and pressed a kiss to the tip of his arousal before whispering something that made him suddenly slick inside. Harry gasped and moaned at the feeling as for the briefest of instances the very tip of a long finger pressed past the muscle. His own hand was guided between his legs brushing too gently over his need leaving him groaning as it was placed in Severus' other hand a slick finger rubbing against his before folding the rest of his hand and guiding the tip to his hole.
"Master!" Harry gasped questioning his eyes wide at the slight pressure.
"Slide it in slowly." Severus said before stepping back. Belatedly Harry realized that the man was still fully dressed. He groaned and concentrated on pressing his finger deeper. His other hand clutched at the sheets beside him struggling not to reach down and touch himself where he needed it most. He whimpered as his finger slid in as far as it would go And Severus' eyes flared.
"You have no clue how beautiful you are do you my Harry?" He whispered reverently. "Slide it back out slowly- yes that's good, not all the way. Now do it again." Harry shuddered as the feeling of being commanded drove him to new heights. "Yesss fuck yourself with your fingers Harry- stretch yourself for me." Severus whispered his fingers plucking the buttons one by one with methodical grace. Harry followed the tempo with his finger and pressed down on it as a new need filled him.
"Master- I'm-!" He tried to explain but the words were lost in his inexperience.
"Empty?" Severus offered before slipping off his outer robe and tossing it onto a chair. "You need more?" He said knowingly. Harry twitched and writhed.
"Yesss." He gasped feeling hot and needing something he couldn't describe- except. His eyes raked Severus' form. Yesss that's what he needed. "You master." He whispered eyes glittering slightly with unshed tears of emotion. "Need you." He managed to gasp out. Severus shuddered a full body shudder that started at his shoulders and slide down his legs. Harry watched as if hypnotized and Severus came closer laying over him a satisfying weight as he lifted his hands and cradled his cheeks pressing the tears away smiling gently.
"Soon Harry, very soon." He promised. Harry shivered as the weight lifted off of him and Severus stepped back again his hand toying with the first button at his stiff collar. "Another finger Harry let me watch- yesss…" Harry felt a twinge of pain but it dulled quickly into a steady almost pleasurable burn. "Oh my Harry." Severus whispered heatedly. "Soon that will be my cock disappearing inside of you." He swore quietly before tugging at the first button. Harry gasped and bit his bottom lip as the second finger slid all the way inside. "Twist them; no slide them out like before keep twisting them with each- yes, good boy, like that." Severus said his fingers flicking away buttons until Harry could match the tempo again and keep it up twisting with each glide.
"Please." He begged feeling empty, hungry, he needed Severus, needed the man to take care of him.
"Another finger Harry." He ordered softly. Harry let out a mewl but did as he was told gasping at the sharp pain as he slowed his motions to accommodate the stretch. Severus' chest was bared to him as the cloth slipped away. It was scarred, pale crisscrossing scars of different shapes and sizes betraying a painful existence. Harry had the sudden urge to press kisses to them, to sooth the lingering pain he knew they held. His breath hitched as he continued his task straining to keep coherent enough to say what he needed to say.
"I never thanked you enough." Harry said his voice raw and rasping. Dark eyes lifted to his and hands paused over trouser buttons. "I could never thank you enough." He whispered his eyes scanning the canvas before him noting that it was more beautiful than anything he'd ever seen before. "I would give you anything, everything, but it would never be enough to repay you." He whispered tears slipping down his cheeks. Severus' eyes softened and his lips slid up in a slight smile. Pale fingers slipped up and slid over the scars.
"You've given me the most precious gift I could possibly ask for Harry, the one thing that would make it all worth it." He said softly. "I know you. I have always known you to the very deepest recesses of your mind I have known you. You would never bow before any other, it isn't in your nature despite that it is what you most need." He whispered his eyes trailing back down as Harry struggled to keep moving his fingers his hand tense and cramping. "Do not mourn these scars Harry. They are proof that you are mine that I have earned what no one else could possibly dream of obtaining." He said guiding his own hand to his neck where the puckered white lines and tears were most obvious. "I wear a collar too you see, a collar that marks me as the one who owns you, the only one who could ever own you." Harry stared at the white marks and let out a soft sob suddenly unable to stay where he was he stumbled forward pulling his hand from himself until he was sliding to the floor in front of the man lifting his hands to touch the raised flesh.
"Alive." He sobbed in sorrow and relief his fingers curling into fists and falling into the mans' arms as they surrounded him. "Alive!" He cried out again. "I never knew what you were to me, what you meant to me! I tried so hard to hate you but how could I when I only respected you? When I only saw the sacrifices you made- when those cold cruel words you screamed at me kept me from becoming something terrible. And then you were there- bleeding- gasping, oh fuck- dieing!" He shivered at the memory. "Dieing in my arms and I couldn't stop it! I couldn't keep you with me! I didn't trust any one else! It was only you, always you!" He sobbed brokenly as strong arms surrounded him rocking him, comforting him the way no one else ever did.
"Oh Harry, oh my brave beautiful creature." He whispered carding long fingers through his hair calming him, soothing him. "I'm here Harry, my poor tormented creature, I'm here in you're arms and I'll not leave you again." He assured. "You'll never hunger again for touch or substance; you'll never thirst for what others have because what ever it is I will give it to you. I will take care of you, you have nothing to fear, not even death himself." He swore nuzzling him gently cradling the back of his head. Harry felt as if his chest would burst from the emotions welling up inside of him.
"Yours." Harry whispered. "Yours" he hissed pressing himself up melding their bodies together until Severus groaned with it.
"Mine." Severus promised sliding his hand around him and slipping two fingers inside of him. Harry cried out and pushed back against them the hungry feeling nearly taking him over. "On the bed Harry, grip the headboard and wait for me." Severus hissed. It took all of Harry's willpower to let the man go and do as he was told. His eyes flickered back towards the man needing to know that he was there, that he was alive and would answer his hunger. Severus slipped the remainder of his clothes off with efficiency his eyes too seeking him out trailing over him possessively until Harry was panting again spreading his thighs as far as they would go. He arched into the body when it finally settled between his legs and over him.
"Please?" Harry whispered. Severus' lips trailed across his jaw before settling over his mouth.
"Scream for me my Harry, let the whole world know who you belong to." He muttered against his lips before drowning him in a kiss. There was pressure- he was raw and hungry for it and begged with a mewl that the man swallowed before pushing forward powerfully.
It felt as if he was tearing in two, breaking and shattering- but it was pure bliss. His body pulled at the man begging him to sink deeper, glide further until he reached the hilt and Harry felt full, complete.
"Oh gods yes!" Harry panted his body shuddering and rippling and clenching around the intrusion. "Yours!" He groaned his toes curling. Severus growled and bit down on his neck teeth sharp and unforgiving until he felt the skin give way and break. He hissed in pain and the teeth retreated a tongue lapping at the blood distracting him from the sing and the ache of it all. His body was hungry. Dark eyes met his heavy lidded and knowing. The pulsing glide ached and then Severus was pushing forward the angle different, pleasure snapped through him powerfully sending shimmering lights behind his eyes as pain was forgotten, muted in the intensity of the pleasure. A shiver of fear wracked through him and Severus knew just as he always did.
Hush love, I know. We are here, we both made it.
And Harry gave in to it. Severus was surrounding him invading him, everywhere that Harry needed him to be filling up the cracks and gaps left by the war. Pleasure coursed through them both as Severus rocked into him sinking as deeply as he could go eyes raking him again and again flickering this way and that until Harry could catch them, hold them tell Severus what he needed to hear.
Always Severus, forever.
I belong to you.
He whispered in his mind as incoherent mewls and pleas spilled from his lips. They were rocking into each other now; he was gripping the head board so tightly that his fingers were numb and cold. They were sliding together meeting each other struggling to get closer and closer to what they were already so close to.
"Severus! G-Going to-!" A hand gripped his chin tightly.
"Not yet." Harry hovered at the edge trapped in the dark eyes trembling with restraint.
"Severus?" He whimpered pathetically his control wavering- it felt so good, he wanted it so much- please, please master please!
"Now." And then he was screaming again and Severus was grunting at the rippling muscles sucking him in tugging him over the edge as he ravaged the willing gaping mouth below his. The pleasure spiked again as Harry felt heat splash into him coating him, claiming him.
"Yours." He rasped. Lips curved against his.
"I know Harry. Mine." Severus whispered.
"Forever." Harry muttered his body going lax. Severus sighed in contentment and tugged him closer still.
"Yes Harry, forever." He whispered. Harry's sleepy eyes gazed into Severus' for a long time and Severus did as he was prone to do and watched him, watched him fall asleep. Watched him smile slightly completely content for the first time in his life. Severus watched him, glittering eyes fading with sleep and contentment.
Hermione stood on the porch as she did every morning on September first. Tears slipped from her eyes as she lifted the bouquet of roses and the small crimson and yellow train. Her thumb brushed the carefully painted H for a few moments and she allowed herself to remember. To remember the boy she once loved and the place she'd once called home, to remember with a smile that sad scrawny little boy with wide green eyes. He was the very same boy that was now a man his eyes older than they should be and yet soft despite the heavy weight he'd once born, Harry Potter.
She'd seen him this time.
She had told herself not to look, knew that it would only bring her grief- and it had. But she had to see him, had to see for herself that he would be okay. Snape was a surprise but the look in his eyes…he was still guarding Harry, even now and Hermione knew that Harry would be safe in his more than capable hands- happy even by the looks of it. Lifting up her hand she brushed away her tears and slowly made her way through the house. She placed the flowers in a vase carefully and then settled them in the center of her table before silently creeping through the empty silent halls to the farthest door on the right. Her lips turned upwards and her eyes softened as she pushed open the door and caught sight of her son.
Books and clothing lay scattered about the room as the boy slept on splayed out on his stomach and snoring softly. Carefully she made her way into the room and to the wall where three long shelves were hung stretching from one wall to the other.
It was a story of better times.
She had told him one for each object she'd received, each one a memory of a distant time. A chess piece, a castle, a broom, a troll, a frog card- mementos to remind her that she was still in Harry's heart- and so was Ron. Her son groaned and sleepy blue eyes blinked open just as she was settling the train onto the shelf. Red bushy hair stuck up on one side where it had been pressed against the pillow and a smattering of freckles shifted as the boy smacked his lips.
"Mum?" He said with a sleep rough voice. Hermione smiled a thin watery smile. Her son was just like his father. "Was Uncle Harry here again?" He muttered rubbing his eyes. Hermione tried to keep her hand steady but it still shook slightly.
"Yes." She whispered. The boy smiled sleepily and curled around his pillow.
"I get to meet him today huh?" He said with wide eyes. Hermione's breath caught in her throat and she avoided looking at the trunk sitting innocently in the corner.
"Yes Albus you do." She said smiling quietly. Albus James Weasley smiled widely and looked at the various trinkets lining his wall. Today he would be going to Hogwarts, and the first time in eleven long years- so would she. Hermione swallowed against her fear and watched her son look up at the ornaments in wonder.
"What is the story of this one mum?" He said nodding at the red train. Hermione looked at it for a long moment her mind flashing over the many memories involving the Hogwarts Express. The miniature Ford Angela had already told him the story of Ron and Harry flying to school in a flying car- what did Harry want her to remember this time? She gazed at it for a few long moments before smiling slightly.
"This story." She began softly. "Is to remind us both…that the golden trio has had many good and bad memories," She said her voice gaining strength despite the tears sliding down her cheeks. "But now…its time for you to begin your own adventures." She said looking back at her son who was smiling wistfully. She glanced out the window into the early morning light and her breath caught in her throat. For an instant, just one instant she could swear that she could see them- two pairs of eyes, one set green, one set black.
They would always be watching.