"Hey… Vlaaadddd… Wanna play the "I love you more than" game?"

Vlad looked up from his newspaper. "No." He said curtly. "Your on drugs. Don't say anything you might regret."

"I love you more than…. Avocados."

"Lovely, Daniel."

A loud, drunken laugh emitted from the boy's mouth. "I love you more than… fruitloops!" He said loudly.

Vlad sighed and turned the page. "I think I gave you an overdose." He muttered.

"I love you more than… bubble bath."

Vlad raised the paper so it covered his face.

"I love you more than… waffles!"

Without thinking, Vlad responded, "I hate waffles."

Danny apparently didn't hear him. "Whyyyyyyy are we inn herreee?" he whined. "I don't like it! It's too biiiiiiig!"

Vlad snapped, "Because you broke your leg, arm, and four ribs in a ghost fight! You're on painkiller! If I hadn't of found you near my house-!"

"I'm on drugs? No… I'm not on drugs, Vlad… I'm not on… I want… tea. Do you have tea? … With beans?"

Vlad threw down the paper and got up from his chair. "You want tea?" He suddenly asked.

"No… I want… a Chihuahua."

Vlad stared.

"And… you have a cat! We can match! We can go shopping with them in the teeny-tiny purses!"

Vlad made a move to leave the room, but Danny said something that made him stop in his tracks.

"Hey Vlaaadddd… am I gonna turn into you?"

"Wait… What? Why would-!"

"Good… cuz' I don't look good with blue skin, or red eyes, or fangs, or a cape, or with a teeny… tiny… goat-tee…"

Vlad approached the delusional boy in wonder. "Just what exactly are you talking about?"

Danny looked at Vlad with a dead-serious expression, before saying, "Dying."

Vlad looked at him and slowly sat back down again. "Do tell more."

"Well… I was in the ghost zone and stuff, and then you jumped out and said I was you, and I was like… Nu-uh! And then you were like, Yuh-huh! And then I was hit in the head with a hair bow! And then… a blue dude was a kid and then an old dude… and then I blew up Amity Park! And your hair was gone… ha-ha! You were bald!"

Vlad dismissed this as an illusion and inspected hid fingernails. Danny continued, "But… everyone… died…"

Vlad looked up. Danny's voice quavered, but he still spoke. "But then… the blue guy- the one that was old- saved everyone! But before that, I was ripped in half… I was all bloody! It was green… like… mold… and red… Hey, Vlad, didga know when we bleed a lot that it turns brown?"

Vlad opened his mouth to speak, but Danny beat him to it. "Oh, crap! Close your ears! You weren't supposed to hear that…"

Vlad nodded with a wince. "I wish I hadn't."

"So… yeah. Carrots, right? Totally shroom,' man."

Vlad dragged a hand down his face and unwillingly shivered. Danny was too drugged for his own good. Vlad wished he would shut up soon…

"Mushrooms… Hey, didga see that giant one on T.V.? It was soooo friendly!"

Vlad took a deep breath. Danny yelled out, "GIANT MUSHROOM! …MAYBE IT'S FRIENDLY!"

Vlad angrily hushed the boy, but Danny continued, "FRIENDLY MUSHROOM! FRIENDLY MUSHROOM!"



And life was like this for a day.