A/N: Hello everyone! I apologize for not getting this chapter to you sooner. However there was a lot of research that went into this chapter so it took me a bit longer than expected. Even with all the extensive research there are still parts in here that I had to "make up". However before flaming me for it please remember this is still fiction. No one was hurting in the making of this story. I didn't go and shoot my husband to find out exactly what happens. :P I would like to thank my pre-readers WitchyVampGirl and MissLuRose for doing such an awesome job for me. I also need to thank my beta Nocturnal Emissions for holding my hand through this hard time and for being my rock! I love you! I apologize for not getting to the reviews this time. It was not done intentional, it's just that RL caught up with me.
WARNING: CHAPTER IS FULL OF ANGST...ENOUGH SAID.
*Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I only own Master Edward and bear's adventures.*
After I had begun writing this chapter I had an unfortunate thing happen. I had lost a friend to suicide by gunshot. This chapter was excruciating for me to write, however I am keeping it the way it is because this is my own memorial to him as sick as that is. So I am writing this chapter with my friend Mikey in my heart and always on my mind. I 3 you Mikey!
Ugh. I hurt. Why can't I open my eyes? It's black here. What's going on? Who is that crying? I am confused and unsure of what is going on beside the ridiculous pain in my left shoulder. Fuck. What the hell happened?
"His temperature is normal..."
"...sir... I don't care who you are, you have to leave..."
"... he seems to be responding..."
Emmett? Why does it sound like my baby is crying?
The world feels as though it's coming to an end. The walls inside my head are closing in. I am intensely drowsy. Finally the pain is gone. I feel giddy. My limbs feel lethargic, almost comatose. My mind is fuzzy as I try to think back to somewhere before the blackness. It's hard to move my body. I can hear a low steady beep somewhere in the back of my mind. Not to mention the sound of someone snoring lightly. The soft sounds are making my heart throb. I don't understand. Fuck. I am so tired. And hungry. My nose hurts. I try to swallow but I can't. I feel like I'm choking. Panic. Fuck the blackness is creeping up again.
Heaviness rolls in
"...come on baby please."
"...can you hear me?...Edward...squeeze my fingers..."
"...why is he so cold..."
"...regulating his temperature...extreme fever..."
Silence. Dreams of vivid colors dance behind my eyelids.
"...we gave him Dilaudid...helps with the coughing fits..."
Somewhere in the dream state I remember hearing one conversation.
"Emmett, what are you going to do about the messages?" My mind barely registers Bella's voice.
"I don't know. I have more important things to worry about right now Bells. It's going to take a lot more than a few threatening letters to keep me away from here," Emmett says, his voice is gruff and full of anger.
"You better think of something. I mean what are you going to do when he wakes up? Not tell him? Get real. You and I both know he will find out sooner or later. And when he does if you haven't told him by then, you're in a world of shit."
"Dammit Bella! I said I don't give a shit! I will worry about that later! Edward just got out of surgery; I don't care about anything but that! FUCK!" He screams loudly. Lanquidity begins to roll in again.
Comatose. Can't move my body. Heaviness washes over me.
I feel as though half my life is over by the time I begin to fully wake up. My eyes flutter open to see a bland white room. I hear a low beeping sound in the corner of the room. My eyes are unfocused and blurred. I can't see anything but outlines of the images around me. I look to my left and see the outline of a body. It brings me comfort. The body's head is resting on the bed next to my thigh. I can feel their hot breath on my fingertips. I try to move my hand to touch them but when I try to move pain shoots straight through my arm to my neck and shoulder.
"Uuughh," I groan. What the fuck happened?
The body next to me stirs at my groans. As they sit up I can make out the face. The person sitting next to me makes my heart palpitate.
He reaches for my hand taking my fingers into his palm barely using any pressure. With his other hand he reaches up and runs his fingers through my hair.
"Baby? Can you hear me?" His voice cracks at the end. I can also hear a slight tone of panic.
I try as hard as I can to answer him. My throat is thick with misuse. I can see the worry lines in his face deepening with each passing second. I try to clear my throat. It hurts. I panic a bit when I realize there is a thick tube running down my throat. I try again to swallow. This time it hurts like a son of a bitch as I thickly swallow. I give up on trying to answer and instead nod my head at him. Trying futilely to blink, I need to see his sweet face. With my right arm I weakly bring it to my face to wipe at my eyes. Again I try to blink past the blurriness. Giving up I decide to stop wasting my time and just see Emmett any way I can. Even if it means through a blurry barrier.
I raise my eyes to take him in. His hair has gotten longer and he needs to shave pretty badly. His eyes are swollen and cheeks are puffy. After minutes of just staring at each other my eyesight begins to clear up and I can see just how terrible he looks. His eyes are riddled with sadness. He is pallor and seems to be thinner than he was. What's wrong baby? I mentally ask. What has my baby looking so bad? It takes a moment for me to catch on. Oh right. Me. I'm the reason why he looks like this. I need to know how bad it is. I need to know what happened. Once again I try to speak but the words are in no way able to come out. He of course knows I need to know and gives me exactly what I want.
"Love, this is not going to be easy for me to tell you. You have been shot in the left shoulder baby. You are in the hospital. Do you remember what happened?"
Shot? I have been shot!
My mind is clouded with blackness and it has no depth. I remember hearing voices and pain. Nothing comes to mind about being fucking shot. Anger rises to the surface as the bile begins to build in my stomach. Fuck. Where was I shot? How long have I been in the hospital? Why can't I move? Emmett waits patiently for me to sort this all out without rushing me. Eventually I shake my head at him. I feel sick and angered that I have no clue what happened to me.
"You were shot by Tanya, baby. We were at Alec's play party a few weeks ago and she shot you. Fucking bitch got away again! Can't fucking belie..." he stops talking when my heart begins to race, making the machine next to me beep rapidly. He grabs my face lightly making sure I am looking at him and begins to reassure to me. I feel my heartbeat decrease the more he shushes me and whispers lovingly. Just as I am fully calm the doctor walks into the room, looking at the chart. He doesn't even notice that I am awake.
"Emmett...how is your boy doing son?" He asks, without ever looking up from my file.
"My boyfriend is awake actually. Then again you would know that if you actually paid attention," he chides. What the...? That is not the Emmett that I remember. My baby would never be so mean. I look over to see the gray haired doctor smiling at me. This man is tall and of Native American descent.
"Well, well. Hello Edward. I am Doctor Jared Cameron. I am the surgeon that is assigned to your case. Glad to see you are awake now. Let me do my assessment and we will see about removing that tube," he explains. His voice is deep and calm. It kind of reminds me of the flowing waters that run deep throughout the reservations. He stands at the head of the bed and reads the long readout attached to the heart machine. I look over to see the paper riddled with jagged lines and different colors. He notices me looking and explains the jumbled mess of paperwork.
"After you were shot to the left shoulder you had gone into hypovolemic shock. Your heart rate went up to 212 bpms. That is extremely dangerous for your heart. Any higher and you could have had a heart attack."
He moves to the other side of the bed and looks at my shoulder. "We are also watching you for other signs of shock; such as, pale skin, profuse sweating, agitation, a thready pulse, lethargy of the muscles and unconsciousness. When you first came out of surgery we had to regulate your body temperature by alternating ice blankets and heating blankets."
He puts the earpieces of the stethoscope into his ears and holds the metal end against my chest. He is quiet for a moment while he listens. "The tube in your throat is to maintain your breathing. We were afraid of you having pneumothorax, which is where air or blood leak around the lungs. Having that can cause severe respiratory distress. Your lungs have a difficult time expanding usually leading to a collapsed lung."
"Are you going to tell him about the extent of his injuries?" Emmett asks, again sounding agitated with the doctor. I wonder if these two have had problems before.
"Yes Emmett. I will. When he is ready to hear them. Right now I would like to take the tube out of his mouth and get him some more pain medication," he scolds. He moves to sit on the side of my bed right next to my right leg. He explains the procedure as he pats my leg.
"Edward, I need to pull the tube out. All together the tubing is close to a foot and a half long. The only way to get it back out is to pull it back through your mouth. You are going to take a few deep breaths and then on the last breath you are going to hold it while I pull it out. Only problem is, you will feel the need to gag and throw up. Understand?"
I nod as he leans over my body. He places his hands on my face and tilts my head down so I am staring at my thighs. Placing one hand on my chin and the other on the tube in my mouth, he pulls off the adhesive and grabs the tube.
"Alright Edward, three deep breaths for me."
I suck in the deepest breaths I can manage and slowly blow them out.
"Alright this one I need to you take a deep breath and hold it. Ready whenever you are."
I steady myself on the bed, grasping at the bed sheets. I see Emmett out of the corner of my eye creeping forward towards the bed. With a deep breath in I hold it as the doctor pulls it out of my mouth. As the tube slides back out I feel sick, and the need to gag is strong. I didn't realize how sore my nose was until this fucking thing was sliding back out. Mother fucker! This is disgusting! Just as the end of the long tubing passes the back of my throat I can feel the flexible tube pass through my throat and out my mouth. I straighten back out and cough roughly twice. Fuck this feels worse than when it was in. At least I can swallow properly now.
"Great job Edward. I will bring you a glass of water and you may sip it. Do not gulp. I' m going to have a nurse come in and bring you more pain meds. Now as for your injuries the bullet hit you in the acromion and shattered the bone. The acromion is a bony process on the scapula or the shoulder blade together with the coracoid process extending laterally over the shoulder joint. The acromion is a continuation of the scapular spine, and hooks over anteriorly. It articulates with the clavicle or your collarbone to form the acromioclavicular joint. We had to piece it back together and structurally rebuild it with pins and artificial ligaments," he drones on.
What the fuck is he talking about?
"Um you lost me after the name of the bone doc. Can you tell me what the fuck that means in English please?" Irritation is laced throughout my question.
"Yes Edward. You were shot in the shoulder. Your clavicle is now held by a steel plate in your shoulder blade. You needed two blood transfusions while in surgery. With physical therapy you should be able to have some use of your arm, although it will not be as much as before you were shot. Now I am sure the pain is kicking in again so I am going to have a nurse come in. I will check on you again a little later."
And with that he left the room. Fuck this was a lot to take in! I need to ask if this is going to affect my D/s relationship with Emmett. I can't even really look at him while I think about the repercussions of getting shot. Fuck this can't be good. What if I am never able to play sports again? Will I always be on pain meds? Fuck what about therapy? Will I always have to go?
My mind races for a while with the 'what if's' and 'why me's'.
Just as I begin to get really frustrated the nurse comes in with the pain medication. At first I thought she was going to give me a pill until she injects it through my IV. Immediately I feel warmth running through my veins as the liquid flows throughout my body. My eyelids begin to droop on their own accord as I watch Emmett take his place next to me again. He has yet to really speak to me and it's making me very uncomfortable. What is he not telling me? Something is wrong.
I can barely begin to panic as the Dilaudid over takes my body and sends me back into euphoria. Even with the peace and silence something in the back of my mind knows this is only the beginning of what's to come.
A/N: I apologize this chapter is so short. One this was really hard for me to write and Two I am going on vacation and wanted to make sure I got something out there for ya'll. However I am sure that I will be writing on vacation because I can't seem to stay away. Love you all and leave me a review pretty please?