Hi everyone xxxDreamingflowerxxx here this is my first fanfic. I got the idea of writing this story when I was saying monologues with my sis while watching Shakugan no Shana Final. Most of those were still stuck in my head and so this story was born. I hope you'll like it.
Disclaimer: I don't own Shakugan no Shana, if I did there would have been more YujixShana moments.
A Shakugan no Shana III Final parody
Chapter 1: A new beginning and more discoveries
It feels like I've been here for hours, no days I don't know, but it feels like I've been here very long. It's dark here and the only thing I see is myself in the form of a blue flame... wait that's not normal, don't tell me… I died? NOOOOOOO! This can't be! I was finally planning to confess to Shana and do couples stuff with her, like dating, kissing, giving her presents and make out and make out and gosh I would finally be able to become a man. This is the worst Christmas ever.
I started cursing to myself, when suddenly I heard a voice; "Why so sad Sakai Yuji?"
I turned around and I saw nothing; "Whose voice is that? Are you a girl or a boy? How do you know my name and where am I? Am I dead? Is this heaven or hell? Why is this happening to me?"
The voice remained silent for a moment before it began to talk again; "Well to answer your questions, I am your conscience, so it's obvious that I am not a girl, no you're not dead, that question should be obvious then too, this is inside of the Reiji Maigo and the reason this is happening to you is because the time of awakening is near."
I was frozen by the pile of information I had gotten, how the hell is someone supposed to follow all the things he says? "Uhm excuse me, but I have no idea what you just said. I only understood something about the Reiji Maigo and someone who's going to wake up? So am I dreaming? Yeah that's it it's still December the 23rd and I am still in bed sleeping and having this weird dream for no reason."
The voice sighed, "This is going to take a while."
The Christmas break is finally over and still no sign of Yuji. I am training at Yuji's garden, after the events on Christmas Eve I can't take it easy.
Who knows when Bal Masqué will appear again and Senpen Sydonay just gives me the creeps. I heard he got arrested in the past for molesting children, and the last time we met I started to feel chills down my spine.
Just when I was finishing my practice Chigusa appeared. "Shana-chan you can take a bath after you have finished your training and have some snacks and drink when you're done."
I turned around to face her "Okay and thank you very much Chigusa." She smiled at me and went inside.
"Thank you very much for the tea Chigusa it was delicious." I said after I finished my tea.
Chigusa looked at me "No problem Shana-chan I am glad you liked it and I am sorry for all the troubles my stupid son is causing to you. I really wonder where he went, he's been gone for days and if he keeps this up he'll have to repeat this year all over again and I hoped he'd do his homework properly, graduate finish university, get a job and get married."
She looked at me with eyes that were saying you know what I mean, right?
"Uhm I am sure that's the wish of every parent." I sweat dropped, these kinds of conversations always make me nervous, since I am a Flame Haze these kinds of things are supposed to have no meaning to me, but why am I still so nervous? Yuji is still gone, who knows where he's hanging around and when he'll come back. "Well I guess I am heading for school then. Have a nice day Chigusa" I said casually.
She smiled "You too Shana-Chan and if you find Yu-chan tell him to come home and make sure he will get his homework done. If he doesn't come back before his little brother is born I'm going to kill him."
I signed "Yuji you're so going to get it when you come back. I paused for a moment, "Wait Chigusa knows she's going to have a son? How did she?
I was suddenly interrupted by Alastor; "I think she read it on the Internet. You know how fans are these days when it comes to spoilers." Alastor is the Guze no Ou that I made a contract with, known as the Tenjou no Gouka by other Flame Haze and Tomogara and one of the true gods of Guze; Tenbatsushin. He's very nice and gives me advice when I need it, but sometimes he makes weird remarks. He uses a Cocytus to communicate, which I carry always with me.
I sighed again "What's wrong with this world?" I continued my walk to school in silence.
School was just like always except for the fact that…. a certain person is absent.
Ogata-San walked up to me. "Good morning Shana-chan and a happy new year. How was your holiday?"
"It was fine I guess." I replied.
Ogata-san looked at me suspiciously. "Has something happened to you? You look a bit down and how come Sakai-kun didn't come with you? You two always come to class together."
"Ohh well I am sure he had something important to do we'll give him his homework when he gets back."
I just stared at her in amazement. I think I need to ask Alastor for an explanation later.
The teacher came in with a refreshed face "Okay class happy new year, now let's make this year even better. Everyone go to your seat we're getting started, Let's start with the absences. Has anyone seen Sakai?"
"No we haven't sensei, but maybe he's just ditching school."
"Hmm, well if he comes back, tell him I'll have an assignment for him as punishment for skipping. It may be the first day, but that's no excuse for skipping classes, Hirai I'll give you the assignment and make sure to give it to Sakai including his homework."
I looked at the teacher. "I will sensei."At our lunch break we were sitting all together at my table.
"So Shana-chan you still haven't heard from Sakai-kun?" Yoshida asked me with a worried look on her face.
"I am sorry Kazumi. It almost looks like he ran away from home. Chigusa is worried about him."
"Hahahaha, maybe he ran away because he didn't want to face the one he'd dump on Christmas Eve, so he decided to hide till you'll all forget." Satou was really laughing hard when he said that.
"Oi Satou, that's very mean to say! Sakai-kun isn't a coward; he's the person who'll confront his problems no matter what it is!" Kazumi almost yelled.
Ike was just sitting with us and listening to the conversation while enjoying his lunch and so was Tanaka.
Ike took a bite from him sandwich and after swallowing it he spoke. "Don't worry guys I am sure he's doing fine and whatever his reason is, I am sure he'll come back and explain everything to us."
*coughrunawaycough* Satou said.
Everyone glared at him.
"So do you finally understand Sakai Yuji?"
"Uhm." I was still trying to set straight everything the voice told me; "So I am not dead? And this isn't heaven or hell? I am inside the Reiji Maigo, but why and how can I talk to my conscience?"
The voice sighed and suddenly a silver flame appeared. I guess that's where the voice came from. "We've been through this already. The awakening remember?"
I blinked a few times. "Who's waking up?"
"Gosh I can't believe how you were able to survive so long. I guess it's thanks to the Enpatsu Shakugan no Uchite. What I mean is your awakening."
*I blinked again. "But I am already awake."
"Please someone kill me before I am killing him."
"How can I get killed by my conscience?"
"It's a metaphor you idiot!"
"Okay okay I got it." Gosh what a rude guy.
"Now let me explain it better. Just see me as your alter ego, the one that's been sleeping for years and is now finally awakening. You were transported into the Reiji Maigo before all of your power of existence disappeared thanks to me and now it's time to awaken as the Sairei no Hebi and become one."
"Wait how can I be a snake if I was born as a human and later turned into a Mystes? And didn't you say… "
"Just forget that plot hole, if you keep on like this we can never continue the story."
"Alright, but can you please explain the rest then?" This guy confuses me so much.
"We've been through this for about a million times. A part of your existence was sealed in the Reiji Maigo for thousands of years, because of the Flame Haze. Now thanks to the actions of Bal Masqué, you're able to awake the part of you that has been sleeping for years and finish the plan of Bal Masqué that were interrupted by the Flame Haze in the past."
I sweat dropped "… Can… I just pretend I understood that and just move on with the next explanation?"
"OH FOR GOD'S SAKE SERIOUSLY I'M SURPRISED THAT NONE OF YOUR FRIENDS TRIED TO KILL THEMSELVES AFTER HANGING OUT ONE HOUR WITH YOU AND I'VE BEEN STUCK HERE FOR DAYS WITH YOU AND I ALREADY WISH I COULD KILL MYSELF!"
"Aren't snakes supposed to be like quiet? And not talking and why are you looking like a silver flame?"
Magery Daw's POV
I wonder how late it is, not that I care. I am so drunk that I can't even remember how to walk. "Oi Marchosias what information have we got?" *hiccup* Marcocias is the Guze no Ou that I made a contract with. Others call him Jūrin no Sōga. His communication tool is a grimoire, which I sometimes use for transport. How awesome is that? Using a book for flying a lot of people can only dream of doing that hahahaha. Too bad he tells some stupid jokes that makes me want to hit him.
"HAHAHAHAHAHAH my beloved drunken Margery Daw, for information we got well …nothing. Ooh but I did heard that some outlaw are getting attacked by members of Bal Masqué and some of our allies died, well pity them at least we're alive."
"*hiccup* Well that's a bummer and Marco we haven't even fought against Bal Masqué since Christmas." I sighed "Oi Marchosias are we out of beer or something *hiccup* I can't find my glass *hiccup* I need to ask Keisaku to get some more *hiccup*."
"Well, you drank a lot the last couple of days and you threw the last glass at me this morning when you were having a tantrum, because Keisaku went to school and the beer you got for Christmas is almost gone. So that means you have me as your company for the rest of your afternoon and your lovely alcoholic drink has to wait for tomorrow HAHAHAHAHA… OUCH!"
"SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH BAKA MARCO! Or do you want me to flush you through the toilet again?*hiccup*"
"Please have mercy, my beloved violent Margery Daw. I'll keep quiet and if you want I can hook you up with some stuff."
"Oh really? Is it good? *hiccup*"
"Of course it's the best I know, but it's expensive."
"Don't worry about that Marco, *hiccup* I know the perfect way to get it for free. *hiccup* Now hurry and tell me. That chibi-chan will arrive soon for some training, and by the way you can make me sober now *hiccup*."
*Your wish is my command my alcoholic loving MAAAARRRRGERY…"
*Yes your highness."
"I hope everything will be alright." Ogata said; "it's nothing like Sakai to play truant and not notifying anyone about his whereabouts. You think he got kidnapped, I mean with how dense he is, he can easily get tricked or maybe he got lost on the way home, it happened a few months ago and the police found him crying in a park near his home."
I still can't believe Sakai disappeared. It's hard to believe especially since he met Shana-chan he didn't get into that much bad luck. Okay he was kidnapped on season 1 of the anime and Shana was the one who had to go and save him, he almost got kidnapped in season 2 two times, no wait that was Pheles trying to get Johan back and the other time was when the Reiji Maigo got stolen. At least he has it better than Princes Peach or Zelda, they get kidnapped every game and I am surprised Mario and Link aren't getting sick of it. If I should give an explanation for all the bad things that are happening here, I would conclude that instead of this city Sakai is the one bringing bad luck here. So it is actually a good thing that he disappeared right? This is too depressing for me to talk about. I think it's better to change the subject, before she keeps going. "So Oga-chan what are you doing this afternoon?"
Ogata stopped walking and turned to me; "Well I have volleyball practice soon so I have to go bye, bye. Be sure to not get mugged by burglars again see you tomorrow." She walked away, turned around the corner and disappeared.
I stood there watching her leave. She's so cute when she's worried about me.
I was too much busy with my thought that I didn't hear someone sneaking up on me. "Give me your money or die!"
"No, please spare me I am just a poor high school student who is a bit too long for his height, I'll do anything please and don't tell my friends I'll be a laughing-stock for them again please don't…. wait Satou? What the… YOU LITTLE BITCH I AM SO GOING TO KILL YOU. YOU'LL REGRET EVERYTIME YOU'VE MADE FUN OF ME!"
"I'll keep quiet about this little accident okay?" He said with a face that tried to be composed, but everyone can tell that he's just trying not to laugh.
"Deal and don't ever do it again okay?"
He shrugged "Well I won't have any other opportunity after today so okay."
I looked at him surprised "What do you mean with that? Are you going to move? Do you have a deadly STD? Please tell me you're going to die."
"No it's nothing like that… wait you what?"
"Oi what are you two talking about?"
Satou and I turned around to see the owner of the voice. It was no one else than Shana-chan. "Shana-chan what are you doing here?"
"I was just on my way to meet the Chōshi no Yomite I am going to train a bit with her." She said.
"After the disappearance of the Mystes, Sakai Yuji I thought it was better for Shana to get more serious with her training so I suggested for her to ask the Chōshi no Yomite to help her train with unrestricted spells." Alastor replied."
"Oh that reminds me Alastor there's something that's been bothering me a while. Despise the disappearance of Yuji everyone he knows seems to remember him. Why is that?" Shana asked."
"Hmm I think it's normal, since it's the Mystes we're talking about. Maybe he didn't disappear, but like Satou said runaway to some anime convention."
"… Alastor…. That's just the dumbest explanation I have heard couldn't you just come up with a better lie?"
"I have worse ones; you guys want to hear them?"
"NO!" Everyone screamed in unison.
Shana looked up at Satou. "Seeing you carrying a big bag full of alcoholic drinks I assume that the Chōshi no Yomite had a drinking mood. Let's get going before she'll destroy your house. I am not in the mood to have the police over here and investigating us. Tomorrow you need to get up early to go to Outlaw. I don't know how long the Chōshi no Yomite will be able to keep up without having a representative and lawyer. How many times was she sent to jail because of too much drinking?"
"I don't know Shana-chan I guess you'll have to ask her, not that she'll ever tell you. Now let's go bye Tanaka."
Again I stood there alone while, 'again' I watched my friends leaving me. "Okay time to get home and read some manga to neglect the fact that I am completely lonely and to be pitied."
"So I have like, for some reason another form that was like, almost killed or something. The Seirei no Hebi who is supposed to be the leader of Bal Masqué?" I asked.
"See you can understand what I've told you, I guess we just have to take it super slow, and with that I mean weeks. If we keep it up like this, we'll be done in like thousand years." My 'so called alter ego' answered me.
"But why am I naked?" I asked
He sighed; "In how many manga, anime etc. have characters been naked when they're in some kind of disorientated space? You're inside the Reji Maigo remember; not really an existence, but also not really gone either."
"How come my clothes disappeared the moment I disappear?"
"Have you been listening to the Enpatsu Shakugan no Uchite when she she was explaining Torches and Mystes?"
"Well kinda, I mean it was a big blow for me and I actually had trouble with believing her. I still can't believe everything you told me. If my friends would see me like this, they'll laugh at me and isn't Bal Masqué supposed to be the bad guys or something? There are too many plot twists here how can I comprehend everything and even believe what a total stranger is telling me?"
"Sakai Yuji, I am seriously at my limit here. I'm sure no one in the world has the patience I have and how can you not trust me if I say that I am a part of you."
I looked at the silver flame for a while. "If you are at your limit then go take a break, but I have no idea where the toilet is and if you are a part of me; why are you telling me this just now instead of much sooner? By the way, you know the longer I stare at your flame the more you look like a silvery blobby thingy. Did you notice that?"
"… I first thought you were just some clueless annoying brat, but now I am really starting to hate you."
"But you're me or whatever crap you just told me, how can I hate myself? Plus it's your own fault for not explaining everything clearly to me from the beginning. How can I understand what you are saying if you're speaking in Einstein language to me."
"I guess your brain capacity is too low to comprehend the normal way of communicating with others, or you just don't care, which gives your brain the concentration capacity of a goldfish. Seriously kids these days don't know anything about manners and etiquettes." The silver flame said.
"If I wanted to have company of an old nerd I'd ask Ike to accompany me and let him talk about his nonsense, while I try to find a way to kill him."
"If I was able to bang my head against a wall I'd be doing that right now. If you keep on like this you'll be stuck in here forever."
My brain froze for a moment. "… Wait stuck here forever without, and no Shana… WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME! MY FREEDOM, MY LOVE, MY SHANA! I DON'T WANT TO LOSE THEM NOO! THIS IS A NIGHTMARE!"
"And we'll be stuck here for a few days or weeks again."
Keisaku and I were just entering his house when we heard the Jūrin no Sōga yelling; "Keisaku, Jou-chan, you're finally here I need your help!"
I looked up at Satou with a confused expression and he gave me the same look back. We went to the room where the Chōshi no Yomite mostly spends her time, but before we were able to enter, suddenly a glass was thrown at us.
"Baka Marco! How many times do I have to tell you to shut up? If I want to drink just let me! *hiccup*"
Both Satou and I were astonished. How much has she been drinking? This is going too far.
"I am sorry guys I guess marihuana flavored beer is the worst to give her, you should be happy that you didn't come in a few hours earlier, that was really the most terrifying moment of my live." The Jūrin no Sōga shivered.
I wonder what happened that made him so scared, but I guess it'll be better if I don't ask. They always say knowing too much isn't always a good thing. "So how come Wilhelmina hasn't arrived yet?" Wilhelmina is the Flame Haze who trained me and took care of me when I was little. She wears a purple maid outfit and has a contract with Mugen no Kantai, Tiamat, who uses a maid headdress as communication. Talk about Wilhelmina's fetish for maid cosplaying, even I am not that addicted to melon pan.
The Chōshi no Yomite turned to me. Wow her face is redder than normal. I have seen her drunk many times, but this is the first time I've seen her that drunk. "*hiccup* Don't worry about her chibi-chan *hiccup* the Banjō no Shite has arrived a long time ago. I offered her to drink with me *hiccup*, but she refused and said she'll wait in the garden. I wonder why? *hiccup*"
"I think I can imagine why she preferred to wait." Satou replied; "I guess it's rude to let Caramel-san wait any longer, let's go.
I've been training with the Chōshi no Yomite Margery Daw for a few hours already, but I still can't get the attack right. I need to get serious, with the things happening I really can't stay this way I need to focus, focus. "FIRE PUNCH!" The fire hand that suddenly appeared punched the Chōshi no Yomite away.
"That was some nice skill you got there, but next time don't try to get you inspiration from video games." She said.
"Sorry, I didn't know what else to do." Maybe it wasn't that smart to stay up late and play Pokémon Black till 4 am, but I really love that game and it's better than the other versions.
"I don't think it's that bad using a move like that." Alastor replied; "actually fire punch is my favorite Pokémon move and as long as she doesn't shout her attacks it wouldn't be that bad."
"Uhm Alastor, how are you able to play video games?" Satou asked.
"I always watch Shana when she plays. It looks really interesting." Alastor answered.
"Seems like an unexpected hobby –de arimasu." Wilhelmina said.
"Game otaku" Tiamat added.
"Okay chibi-chan enough chatting let's get going. Here I come with more attacks. Yaaaa!"
I guess it's going to take some time before I've perfected this technique.
"I think I finally understand." I sad smiling.
"Finally, I was afraid I would stay here the rest of my existence explaining the same crap all over again. So what will you do now, Sakai Yuji?"
"Well at least not helping Bal Masqué that's for sure." I replied.
"WHAT? Why not?" You're their leader." My other self said.
"Well first they kidnapped me, used me as some kind of energy amplifier, tried to kill the love of my life, stole the Reiji Maigo and Itadaki no Kura Hecate almost traumatized me in season 1 and in the Shanatan series, Sydonay wanted my virginity, Shana is the only one who's allowed to do that. They're my enemies and I prefer making out with Shana, than fighting her. I mean what's it in for me if I take your deal?" I asked.
"How about no school, no tests, no homework, no annoying teachers, no annoying nerdy classmates/ friends, you'll become a god with unlimited power, you'll have a whole army of Tomogara under your commande and a very luxurious castle, were you and Shana can have your love moments in peace." He answered.
At Sereiden three figures waiting for their leader to finally make his appearance.
One of them was a woman, who looked in her thirties. She has red long hair that goes till her ass. She has three eyes which one is covered by an eye patch. She's the Gyakuri no Saisha, Bel Peol also known as the strategist.
The second one was a girl that looked like she was an elementary school girl. She had blue short hair and wears a White cape and hat. Her expression would make everyone shiver; Itadaki no Kura Hecate or the priestess as the other members of Bal Masqué call her.
The third one looked like an old man who could be sent to the hospital at any minute. He has a pair of demon wings, a tail and two horns on his head. Rantei Fecor, the guide of Seireiden and guiding tourists around the palace every day. This day was different; today a very important person would arrive after a million years of sleep.
"Why is our commander taking so long?" Bel Peol asked; "We've been standing here for almost a month and he still hasn't arrived."
"Please be patient Bel Peol." Hecate said; "I am sure there is a very good reason why it takes so long for our commander to arrive."
"But this is ridiculous!" Bel Peol exclaimed; "Ever since Christmas Eve our commander should have awoken already and make his appearance. I am sick of it I am going to get something to eat and drink I haven't had anything for months I can't believe I was able to last this long."
"But Bel Peol-sama, as a Tomogara it's not necessary to fill ourselves with human food. We only need power of existence to survive." Fecor reassured.
"Oh yeah I totally forgot, but some of the dishes humans make are really delicious you guys should try it too."
"Uhm well maybe…" before Fecor could finish his sentence, he was interrupted by an overwhelming presence of someone with a great power approaching; "Sorry I am so late guys I hope I haven't made you wait to long for my arrival."
The person was a young man, who looked like he was 17 or 18. He has long dark brown hair, which was braided at the end, which made it look like he had a snake tail. He wore a red armor that looked like you would burn if you'd worn it in summer.
A/N: I don't know why I am describing some of the characters, since most people who read this are SnS fans and already know how the characters look like and know their names too. Ow well it's a parody so it doesn't matter and I can write whatever I want.
He of course is no one else than the Mystes Sakai Yuji, or as he'd be called now Sairei no Hebi Sakai Yuji. The founder and leader of Bal Masqué. Well Bal Masqué must have been pretty hopeless without him, so now they can actually do something useful.
Fecor looked at Yuji like he was going to explode; "Commander we were waiting a whole month for you. We haven't moved from this spot since Christmas. Do you have any idea how hard it's been for us? We weren't able to get any presents from Santa. The day after Christmas every other Bal Masqué member visited us to show of what cool stuff they got and we had to stand there and try to hide or tears. I had to cancel all my appointments with the hospital, because of you. Bel Peol-sama is grumpy because she couldn't eat human food and the priestess…" He looked at Hecate for a moment.
-_- "What?" Hecate asked.
Fecor sweat dropped; "Okay the priestess can handle waiting years at the same spot and still stay the same as always."
"No I can't" She answered; "I need to change scenery every six months or I'll get the feeling I want to do something very horrible to the first person I see."
… The others were silent for a moment, until Bel Peol broke the silence; "So commander I see that you decided to wake the Mystes, instead of letting him dormant and use the vessel we planned to use."
"OF COURSE I'D DO THAT YOU IDIOT!" Yuji yelled; "HAVE YOU SEEN HOW UGLY THAT THING IS AND IT'S TOO EMBARRASSING FOR ME TO USE! WE'RE NOT LIVING IN THE PAST! I'D BE RIDICULED BY EVERYONE! WERE AM I ABLE TO SLEEP, EAT OR RULE BAL MASQUE IN THAT GIGANTIC KNIGHT ROBOTIC LIKE THING? OUTSIDE THE SEREIDEN? EVEN META KNIGHT WOULD LOOK MORE INTIMIDATING THAN ME! PEOPLE WOULD SAY OH LOOKS LIKE THE LIBERTY STATUE GOT A BOYFRIEND! DON'T YOU KNOW THAT THE MYSTES AND I ARE ONE AND THE SAME! SHANA WON'T EVEN COME NEAR ME THEN, MY BODY WOULD BE COMPLETELY GONE AND INSTEAD I HAVE TO LIVE IN A PIECE OF STEAL? DO YOU LOOK DOWN ON ME THAT MUCH?"
Bel Peol, Fecor and Hecate were in a state of shock and fright, due to the sudden outburst of their commander, even though you couldn't see it on Hecate's face inside she was trembling.
"I told you he wouldn't be happy with that ridiculous armor." Fecor whispered to the strategist, "That Mystes looks like a stud next to that armor."
"Oh just shut the fuck up." Bel Peol snapped at him.
"Uhm" Hecate started; "Shouldn't we start with the plan already?"
Yuji turned to Hecate; "Oh yeah our plan there's a lot that we need to prepare, call every member of Bal Masqué I have very important tasks for everyone, but first let's go to China were we have enough privacy to discuss everything."
"Yes commander" they said in unison while bowing to him.
"Well I guess now the real show is beginning." Yuji thought.
Okay that was chapter one and I would like to give special thanks to 2 friends of mine JD and MD, who helped me with this story and my sis for talking me into writing the story. I am planning of finishing chapters 2, 3 and 4 soon. I have my reasons for doing that.
Yuji: There goes my self-respect. Why did you have to make me sound like an idiot?
Me: That's called being dense my dear Yuji and it'll make this story funnier. Plus the ones who helped me out with the story loved your personality and so do I. So you'll be stuck with it for the rest of the story hah.
Shana: Well at least my personality isn't that twisted.
Me: You don't need a twisted personality to give you funny moments. I have already a nice idea for you Shana-chan. *evil laugh*
Wilhelmina: You… I hate you –De arimasu.
Me: O.O Why?
Wilhelmina: You gave me only one line in this chapter –De arimasu.
Taimat: A great disappointment.
Me: Don't worry guys the further the story progresses the more lines you'll get.
Wilhelmina: I hope you will, for your own shake –De arimasu.
Me: *sweatdrops* well okay I gotta go I am starting to feel a killing aura coming close heheh.
Seirei no Hebi: NOT SO FAST! YOU COME BACK AND I'LL SHOW YOU REAL HELL!
Me: Okay I really gotta run R&R guys and no flaming or I'll send SnH and Wilhelmina after you. *runs away screaming*
Seirei no Hebi: COME BACK YOU'LL PAY FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME!