Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or the characters or the song, "Haunted," by Kelly Clarkson.
Hey, guys. I was just listening to this song earlier and it just seemed like the perfect song to write a BXV fic to (ironic coming from the girl who always hated songfics and who is writing a multi-chaptered BXV songfic XD). Anyway, I hope you like it, as it was just a random idea I had. Three year timeframe.
The voices in my head
All the things you said
Vegeta woke up in the middle of the night. It wasn't the first time where he would have days of prolonged nightmares. In all honesty, he expected them to just end the moment Frieza was killed. They had only been stronger now, and it was because of his own weakness.
He felt like a failure and a coward. How could he let Frieza get the better of him like he did on Namek? He had been frozen with fear for most of the battle, while those weaker than him continued to fight. Why they cared so much, Vegeta would never understand. Other than the Namek, it wasn't the others' home. He would never help to fight to protect a planet that wasn't his home, Vegeta told himself. But wasn't he training to do just that now?
No, it wasn't like that. The Earthlings had nothing to gain by helping the Namekians, but he was only helping to save Earth just so he could fight and defeat Kakarot, leave the planet, and possibly destroy it. He needed to redeem himself.
Some of his nightmares were about Kakarot and the lavender-haired boy who both bested Frieza when he could not. Other times it was of Frieza or his father, taunting him for being so weak, beating him for being so disobedient, or failing himself and his race.
Vegeta growled in frustration, but he thought he had been quiet enough. Before he knew it, the door to his room slammed open revealing a very irate Bulma.
"What is your problem?" she asked. "It's like four in the morning and I heard you all the way from my room down the hall. This is the fifth day this week."
"Get out," Vegeta replied. He didn't want to deal with her right now, especially when he was so angry. If she pushed him, he would end up doing something he regretted. It wasn't that he cared about her well-being, but Kakarot would come after him before he was ready to fight him.
"Look, I know you're frustrated. If I were you, being a stranger on a foreign planet that you once tried to destroy, then I'd be wary too."
Vegeta glared at her. She couldn't even begin to understand what was going on inside his head. It had nothing to do with being on this planet. He could care less about how he was received by the Earthlings.
"You don't know anything," he said sounding sadder than he had intended.
Bulma's rage disappeared when she heard his voice and concern replaced it. "Are you okay?"
"Leave," was all Vegeta said before he turned over on his side, leaving his back to face her. He normally wouldn't turn his back on an opponent, but she was weak and Vegeta wasn't worried. He realized maybe he did make a wrong move when the woman sat down at his bedside and put her hand on his back comfortingly.
"If you need to talk, I'll listen," she told him before getting up and leaving the room. She hadn't noticed Vegeta tense up at the touch of her hand.
What is wrong with me? he asked himself feeling the rage spike inside of him. How could he tense up at the simple touch of a weak woman? Was he really that weak with the mentality of a frightened child? Where was his pride?
Faster the days go by and I'm still
Stuck in this moment of wanting you here
She couldn't take it anymore. People always say waiting is the hardest part. It wasn't hard to agree. It had only been a few months since they had received the warning from that kid from the future; yet it felt like it had been a lifetime of waiting. What was worse was that Vegeta was keeping her up at night. It wasn't just the growl like he had thought. Every night, she would hear him scream in agony, but she kept that to herself. Bulma had never been so thankful that he parents slept in the other side of the compound. There was no doubt in her mind that if Vegeta knew they had heard that he would kill them all.
Some days it felt like time stopped and today was one of those days. Bulma tried to get her mind off of everything. She had a day to herself and went to the spa, shopping, driving, anything to get her mind off of Saiyans, training, Androids, and the Gravity Room.
Sometimes she cursed her father for building that machine. Vegeta never took care of it and she was the one who had to fix it. Not to mention Vegeta nearly got himself killed in it about a month and a half earlier.
For the first time that day, she finally heard some movement in the compound. Vegeta had just finished training for the day and it was the two of them alone.
Her parents had left earlier for an out-of-town conference and she was left to take care of everything. She didn't mind, but she had no idea how she was going to cook all that food to feed her hungry, Saiyan houseguest. For tonight, she just ordered takeout.
"Hey, Vegeta, I just ordered some food so it should be here in a little under an hour." Vegeta just responded with a nod and left to go upstairs and shower.
When he came back downstairs, the food had arrived and Bulma was already preparing a small plate for herself and many plates for Vegeta. Vegeta just stared at her as she prepared the food. She looked, or maybe seemed, different to him somehow, but he couldn't place his finger on it.
Bulma looked up from the food and flashed Vegeta a smiled before continuing her handiwork. Vegeta blushed, but he didn't know why. What was so different about her tonight?
Bulma walked over to the table and put a few plates of food down in front of him. "Enjoy," she said before going to get her own plate. She was about to leave the room, but her shock prevented her.
"Stay," Vegeta whispered.
She turned around slowly to face him with surprise flashing across her features. "What did you say?" Vegeta didn't respond.
He looked at her and, for the first time, she noticed that these last few nights were taking a toll on him. Her expression became just as serious as his as she walked back over to the table and put her plate down in the spot next to him. She hadn't sat down yet, but instead walked behind him and started rubbing his tense muscles.
"What are you doing?" he asked in a whisper.
"It's called a massage," Bulma explained. "It helps relax your tense muscles and feels good. Just relax, okay?"
Vegeta closed his eyes and leaned back into her. It did feel good and Vegeta felt somewhat at peace. He realized that that was what he was feeling earlier watching Bulma prepare his food. It was strange, though. What could have made him feel at peace about that? He would probably never figure it out.
Vegeta didn't want her to stop, but they both had to eat before it got late. After dinner, Vegeta went to bed. That night, he didn't have a nightmare.
In the blink of an eye
You held my hand, you held me tight
After that night, Vegeta started seeking Bulma out more and more, whether to bicker or to find comfort. He realized that she was a big part of his life and he didn't really know how to handle it well. Bulma figured out his feelings, though, and the two of them started having a secret relationship. It was Bulma's idea to keep it a secret, but it wasn't because she was ashamed. If word got out, it would probably become common knowledge to the entire world and she didn't want him to have to deal with reporters, although she wouldn't mind if they got into an "unfortunate accident." That was just a thought she had sometimes.
Vegeta was also still recovering from whatever he had gone through under Frieza. Bulma had figured it out a while back that his nightmares were about that time. There were still nights where he would have those nightmares and it worried her.
It wasn't as often as it had been, but that was because of her. She wasn't thinking that because she was being vain or arrogant, but because on the nights he spent with her he wouldn't scream out or beg for mercy. It was unsettling to hear this strong man pleading for his life; and on the nights he did start to stir, she would rub his arm comfortingly and he would settle down and sometimes unconsciously nuzzle against her.
Now, about four months after they started their secret relationship, Bulma was getting sick. Vegeta would show concern every once in a while, but for the most part he continued training. This irritated Bulma, but that was only because she didn't understand. Vegeta was afraid to lose the one thing that gave him any comfort and was attempting to distance himself.
After going to a doctor, Bulma realized that she wasn't sick, but was in fact pregnant. She didn't really know how to take the news that she was going to be a mother. She wasn't young, but she didn't know if she was responsible enough to take care of a child. I mean, her career involved inventing things like weapons, if you count the GR as a weapon, and she worked around dangerous machinery every day. She would manage, though, if only because ever since she got the news she was starting to fall in love with the unborn child. The problem was telling Vegeta.
Vegeta didn't really seem like the father type. He would up and disappear all the time and then he wouldn't get any sleep at night. Then he would disappear again and come back injured because he hadn't been looking out for himself. If he couldn't take care of himself, how would he be able to take care of a baby? Plus, he despised the fact that Gohan was half-human. What if he felt the same way about his own child? Then the baby would probably have self-esteem issues in the future, much like his father had now.
When she got home, she searched for Vegeta and found that he was nowhere around. The GR was even missing.
"Um, dad…" she started. "Where's the GR?"
"Oh, Bulma, you're home," her father said nonchalantly. "Oh, the GR…well, Vegeta decided to go into space to train for a while. Personally, I'm glad. The GR was taking too much time away from some of my other projects. Well, back to work."
Now you're gone
And I'm still crying
I'm dying inside
Bulma couldn't believe what her father had said. He left without saying goodbye and without knowing about their child. Things were going so well for them, so why did he leave. He was feeling better and she had never been happier. Sure, he had been training a lot more and not spending every night with her, but was that a sign? Was he trying to tell her that he didn't want to be with her anymore? Or was he really training like he told her father he was?
Only to my eye
I see you, I feel you
Don't leave my side
It's not fair
Just when I found my world
They took you, they broke you, they tore out your heart
That night, Bulma could sleep. She had gotten so used to Vegeta being with her at night and knowing that he wasn't even on the planet was making those last nights without him seem like nothing.
All she could do was think about him. She thought about the first time they kissed, the first night they consummated their relationship, the first time he ever let down his guard and told her of his past. I need to see him.
She then had an idea. The GR had that screen in it so that they could communicate with him.
I don't care if he's training, Bulma told herself. He left her to deal with all of this alone, so interrupting his training was the best punishment she could give.
I miss you, you hurt me
You left with a smile
Mistaken, your sadness
Was hiding inside
The call went through. Vegeta had actually answered and he looked a mess.
"Woman, I'm training," he growled.
"Why did you leave?" Bulma asked calmly, though she was breaking inside.
"I needed to get away," Vegeta replied. "I could never stay on that pathetic rock for so long."
Bulma's heart was aching. Was he saying that he would never stay, even for her? "You probably just needed a change of scenery. We could have gone somewhere alone, away from the compound."
"I didn't need to get away from the compound!" Vegeta snapped. "I needed to get away from you!"
That broke her resolve. She looked away from the screen, though that couldn't hide her tears from him. When she turned back to face him, he wore a smirk on his face. It dawned on her that he really wouldn't care whether or not she was pregnant.
"Whatever," she mumbled. "I just wanted to make sure you'd be back to fight the Androids. Don't worry; I won't call you again."
Vegeta watched the screen as she disappeared and then frowned. He took a deep breath to calm himself. He thought about her reaction, but if she was sick then this was for the best. Now that they were distanced, he could go training without distraction. It was up to her to take care of herself and her family's job to be her support group. Powering up, he increased the gravity by ten and continued his intense workout.
Now all that's left
Are the pieces to find
The mystery you kept
The soul behind a guise
The pregnancy was rough. Bulma was not only eating five times the amount of food she was used to, but she also had so much energy to burn by the end of the day. No wonder Vegeta had been able to train non-stop. He must have had way more energy than she had.
When Trunks, her baby boy, was finally born, Bulma had a lot of decisions to make. Should she let the doctors cut off his tail like they offered? How did she want him to grow up? Did she want him to keep it and get teased at school? Would she tell him of his father and that he was a Saiyan or would Vegeta leave after the Androids and leave her to raise him like a human?
"Ms. Briefs?" the doctor called out.
Bulma nodded. "Go ahead." She watched sadly as the doctor cut the boy's tail before it became too sensitive to be removed like Goku's. Now her baby wouldn't have to worry about that kind of pain.
Why did you go?
All these questions run through my mind
I wish I couldn't feel at all
Let me be numb
I'm starting to fall
The fact that Trunks looked so much like his father caused Bulma so much pain. One day, he would grow up to be an intelligent, young man and would want to know about his other parent. Bulma knew she would have to answer all of his questions eventually.
But what about her own questions? It had been a little over a year and she hadn't spoken to Vegeta for any of that time. He didn't know he had a son and he probably wouldn't until he came back to fight the Androids one year from now. If he found out, would he stay or run away again? Why did he run away in the first place? After the first few months, she realized that it had nothing to do with her. It had to have something to do with whatever fears he wasn't telling her about. Oh well, it was time to get on with her life. She was a mother and she'd be damned if she let a man make her feel like she had no worth. All that mattered was her adorable baby boy.
Where are you?
I need you
Don't leave me here on my own
Speak to me
Be near me
I can't survive unless I know you're with me
Tomorrow was the big day and Vegeta still wasn't back. Part of Bulma wondered if the idiot got himself killed while training. She wouldn't be surprised, but she hoped that wasn't what had happened. Now that it was getting closer to the predicted end of the world, in a sense, Bulma was thinking back on her life. Now, Bulma wasn't one to regret much. Things happened; life went on. That was just the way it was. However, she had one regret dancing above her head and she was reminded of it every day when Trunks did something new. Why didn't she just suck it up and tell Vegeta she was pregnant? If he ever made it back, he'd probably hate her for keeping this a secret.
She missed him, plain and simple. It was dawning on her how short life truly was. There was so much she hadn't done yet. There were so many things she hadn't shown Vegeta on the planet. If they all survived this, she would find some way to convince him to stay and show him the beauty and joy that life had to offer. She wouldn't take things for granted, she promised herself.
Where are you?
Where are you?
Bulma cried herself to sleep. She would never admit it to her friends, but she was terrified. That's why she tried to convince the guys to go after Dr. Gero. Then they wouldn't have to worry about the Androids and could have lived happy lives, but then she and Vegeta probably wouldn't have gotten together and she wouldn't have her son.
Bulma dreamt about him that night, about him touching her and kissing her. Then he disappeared and all she could say was, "Where are you?"
Vegeta arrived just in time to hear her words. He smirked. He had finally done it. He became a Super Saiyan. Without the constant worry, he was able to focus on his goals and now that he had, he came home. Yes, home, but he would never admit it out loud, nor would he admit that he was happy about her not being ill. It was a pleasant surprise to find her still alive. However, he was still unaware of his son.
Bulma groaned and stirred in her sleep, but just turned over. Vegeta decided to slip into bed. When Bulma turned over, she unconsciously latched onto him. His chuckle started to wake her up.
Bulma thought she was dreaming when she saw him, but knew this moment was real when he kissed her gently and smirked down at her. She was so overjoyed and overwhelmed and began to tell him of all the important things that had happened.
Bulma thought he'd be mad, or hurt, that she kept the secret from him, but she was in shock at how he reacted.
You were smiling
A/N: Hey, I worked all day on this so I hope you all enjoyed it :3 Let me know what you thought. I tried to make it a bit different than the normal 3 year fics. Let me know if I succeeded.