I do not understand. What is it that I have not? What makes it so attractive that your view? Why do not realize that I'm interested in he? Why not look at me?
I accept, no matter how painful, I'm desperate for some attention.
My obsession began that day when I visited Iason and all weekend. It was his first day, and barely notice it, if not for that little fault of his own, perhaps I never would have noticed him.
He had dropped the tray which brought us food, scared, cleaned everything with the disaster quickly, apologizing for the low.
I was surprised by its beauty first stay, I remember congratulated to Iason for the good appearance of his new furniture, and he said that if a little awkward in reality it was also very intelligent.
As time passed, I catch myself thinking about him, in his beautiful red hair, his golden eyes, deep, exciting, when that happened I chastised myself and away from such thoughts. It was not until that night that I did not accept my obsession with him.
I had dreamed of him, as usual, but this time with the difference that in my dream we had sex.
I figured that his beautiful voice, who had only heard when whispered a few things, moaning my name. I imagined the feel of his red hair. I figured his glassy eyes full of pleasure and affection. I imagined his naked teen body delicate and rough, covered with a thin layer of sweat.
I imagined him telling me he loved me.
I awoke from that dream erotic completely mixed, with an incredibly painful erection, and with only one thought in my head.
Back to that dream a reality.
I had to hold he in my arms.
Since then I worry about those thoughts, something in me says that is normal. I know that is not normal is that severe, unexplained hatred to Iason.
Well, almost inexplicable. I know it is. Katze because he loves him.
He loves him so much.
And I hate that.
I've seen looks like it is rapt, as looks away blushing.
I hate those looks.
Whatever I do, do not receive one of those looks.
And yet, I try.
Like now, I've been more than 2 hours getting ready for the weekly meeting with Iason. Katze I know will be there, so I have to see me splendid.
I need see me perfect.
Better than Iason.
I will not let this happen again the same as the others days, something in me says that today is the special day. The day when Katze - tired of the rejection of Iason - turn the other way, and then ... then I will see me and love me.