No Going Back

Disclaimer: The clock on the mantelpiece could tick till the end of time, but even then, the world of Shakespeare's Macbeth still wouldn't belong to me.

Summary: Just what was Macbeth thinking after he killed King Duncan in Inverness? A little glimpse into his thoughts through the means of a diary. One-shot.

I committed a horrible deed tonight, and I fear I will never be the same again. Killing King Duncan had taken a lot out of me.

My wife had told me that what's done is done, but I am not so sure. Fear of being exposed is still an issue, and I understand now that I will always have to be cautious and on my guard. If Macduff or the others find the truth... I will have to silence them forever, or be destroyed completely. For who would trust me if the truth was known to all? To them, I would no longer be the honored Thane, but a liar, a heartless murderer. But truly, could the King's death have been avoided? No, there was no escaping Fate's will. Duncan would have died even if I had not done the deed. It is not my fault that he is dead; I am only Fate's servant, forced to carry out her will.

Yet, even with the knowledge that I am not responsible, I still feel a great sense of remorse for my actions. The half-choked screams, the violent twitching, the accusing stare as he took his last breath - all these haunt me like a restless ghost. The ghastly images of the last moments of the King's life still plague me relentlessly, regardless of whether I am awake or asleep. Though I have managed to conceal the fact that I am hallucinating, my wife is becoming suspicious of my sudden inattentiveness at times.

My relationship with my wife is also going downhill. She thinks I have just killed an old man, but it is not so. The King - I had vowed to serve him, and I had kept my promise gladly until this night. Duncan was the person I admired, the hero I worshipped. And now I have killed him! Though it was necessary, the shame still weights heavily on my conscience.

I know that once I set down this road, there will be no return. Now I just want it all to end.

A/N: My first story on Macbeth… And most probably the last one too. This was just a little expression thing our English teacher got us to do… Leave a review if you're nice!

Bianca tabbycat

P.S. If any of my readers of "Pickup Lines" are also reading this, I'm so sorry! I've got this gigantic writer's block for the next chapter 'cause I have no idea how to describe Hermione's dress. ARGH! So if you want to give me a helping hand… P.M. me and I'll spin out the chapter! :D