Title: I'm Not Him.
Warning: None yet.
Disclaimer: Don't own LOUK nor it's pretty officers/barristers.
Notes: My first LOUK fiction! For FreekyDisaster18 (Check out her one too) as we're both a bit intrigued by DS Sam Casey ;-)
It's a drabble, so nothing happens... really.
I met Ronnie – DS Brooks – at a time when he was grieving for DS Matt Devlin's death. I wanted to help find the shooter of Matt Devlin because I had heard how amazing he was as a copper. He was a lantern of light; those were DI Chandler's words. I saw how it was affecting Ronnie, how he was tipping onto the verge of alcoholism again. Matt was clearly his strength and the one to keep him sober. Ronnie told me that Matt once made him promise that as long as he was around, Ronnie would never drink. He was always there, stopping him ordering a beer or lager in the pub after a case. I don't want to replace him, but I'm not going to let Ronnie do that to himself, he's too much of a good man with a good heart to wash it away with drink. I'm not DS Matt Devlin. Am I? I'm Sam, Sam Casey, and I'm trying to do a job I've always wanted to do.
I don't want to give Ronnie the wrong idea. That I want to suddenly fill in Matt's shoes, because I know what it's like to lose a colleague, a friend, and someone you grow to love.
What does that make you? His lapdog or his bitch?
The words still echo in my head, but it's not like I let them get to me. Officers like me who are, well, slighter built and less fierce looking get that a lot. It's almost like protocol. Matt had got it a number of times, with various little yobs calling him gay when he was far from it, he had his share of girls. I got it too, and still do. That's the problem when you don't look like a six foot version of haggis in a patrol car. Men are intimidated by the badge and get on the offensive, and some women curl around your finger when you let them know you're copper. Hey, I've used my job with girls, who hasn't? Ronnie, having dealt with those kind of idiots - the ones who think taking the mick out of a man who can put you in a ten by six is a good idea - longer than I have, just stood there and waited for me to get my act together.
That's one of my issues I do have a bit of a temper. It's not outwardly violent, but sometimes the criminal classes do my head in, when they think they can just lie and get away with it. Actually the legal system is backwards really, and I didn't hesitate in telling Jake that. Jake Thorne, he's someone I can see being a good friend of mine in a few years' time. Like Ronnie, he's worked to get where he is, and like me gets frustrated with the defence counsel. Not as smart as I let on? Yeah, I did enjoy that, I'm not going to lie. He gave me one of those your-new-so-I'm-going-to-be-nice-but-I'm-your-superior-remember-that, look. Not likely I will, but people have told me it's my charm that makes people like me. From what I've heard Jake's a bit of a womaniser, if that blonde barrister was anything to go by. I'll remember to ask him about that...
Alesha's still guarded around me, and I'm sure she felt something for Matt, her eyes say so when she turns them Barrister-trained on me. Just hope she begins to trust me. Ronnie told me that Alesha Phillips was the last person to do something for someone she didn't trust i.e. helping me out with the accusation bought against me from that kid.
I tapped my pen on the desk, and ran a hand through my hair. Kath was texting me about Ben, and after she had dropped him off at the station in front of Ronnie, I wanted her to lay off. I was right, she doesn't realise I actually have a job that doesn't have set clock in and out times. Ben's my little boy, and whatever happens between Kath and I – because I really don't know at the moment – he always come first. Thinking about it, Ben would like Ronnie. I huffed a laugh to myself, Kath nearly wanted to call him Ronnie as well, good thing we didn't. I smirked, thinking Ben would end up calling Ronnie Uncle Ronnie or something.
'Alright Sam, shift yourself off home' Ronnie's voice carried the length of the room. Spinning round in my chair he looked down at me through those glasses, carrying a cup of tea in his cup.
'Don't you need help with the reports?' I asked, just as my phone vibrated once again.
'Don't be silly, if the guv catches me I'll be nicked for over working a partner' I could feel the other DS watching me as I looked at Kath's text message. 'And you have family waiting for you' and I stuffed my phone in my pocket and got up, hauling my jacket off the chair.
'Thanks Ronnie. Don't stay long either 'cause I'll know' I said and mock saluted him and he shook his head at me in the sort of oh-dear-he's-already-lost-it-look.