On 2/14/2012, Arizona (the grandaddy of the Old West) celebrated it's hundredth year of statehood. In other words its centennial birthday.
So how 'bout a story to celebrate the baddest territory of the Wild West?

But first, let me take you back a few hundred years.
To a territory where you could do as you like.
Whether it be civilized or rowdy.
Where countless pioneers traveled to in hopes of a new life.
Where the law was upheld by the sheriff.
Where a dispute would be settled by a good old-fashioned duel.
Where cowboys would come and go either looking for work or causing mischief.
And a place where everyone would greet each other saying howdy.


The stranger rode into town on the back of his poorly-fed pony shortly after the sun peaked in the sky.
The unbearable heat pounded down on him, and Robin looked around for a friendly face. But his gaze only met the hardened faces of outlaws and cowboys who had come out to see the visitor.
Seeing from his scared childlike face that clearly he wasn't a bounty hunter or Federal Police, they wordlessly returned to their lives.

Tired from his travels, the boy dismounted and walked into the saloon. A few men looked up to see him, but most were otherwise occupied.
Several sat at tables playing poker, and wouldn't dare take their eyes off the dealer. Others were too captivated by the dancing girl to even notice Robin's entrance.
Others still were gathered around the 'wild boy'.
A green savage brought in from out of town by a shady entrepreneur.
Being caught as a cheat and shot by a local resident, it was decided that the entrepreneur's pet be kept in the saloon for the public's amusement.
Robin took this all in as he walked over to the bar. The negro behind the counter looked at the teenaged boy and said

"What'll you have sonny?"

"Whiskey"

"Coming right up kid."
Robin downed the drink and beckoned the bartender to pour him another.

"Drink up kid, you look dragged out. I'll go ahead and get ya some food while I'm at it."

"No thank you sir, I'm on my own without much money. A drink is all I can afford."

"Don't worry about it. You've got an honest face. Besides, dreamers like you who are between hay and grass; you lift my spirits. You can owe me."

"Much obliged sir."

Day quickly turned into night, and the intoxicated Robin soon found himself sharing stories with the few who still remained in the saloon.

"...So with nothing left for me at home, I set out to find a new life on the frontier."
Robin finished telling his story and took another sip of whiskey. The dancing girl, with no one left to entertain, had sat down next to him.
She stroked her long red hair and examined the young pioneer.

"You're going to find this town hard to live in without a gun and job."

"Then what do you propose I do?"
Starfire checked to make sure her boss was out of earshot then leaned forward and whispered.

"The bartender lost his son in an accident recently. The poor kid got run over by an out of control carriage. But the kid was a lot like you.
The same attitude, I mean. He'll probably take you in and give you a job if you ask."
The medicine woman looked up from the 'wild boy' long enough to shake her head in disapproval before turning back to her patient.

"Don't pay any attention to her she just an Indian who doesn't even know how to speak. In fact, she's a living example of the bartender's kindness.
After the Calvary decimated her tribe, Mr. Stone was the only man willing to give her a home. If he'll help an Indian out, then surely he'll help you."
Robin looked carefully at the cloaked medicine woman.
Although said to be an Indian, she must have been Cherokee, for her skin was deathly pale.
Though it could also be due to her staying inside a tepee to heal instead of being outside hunting. She muttered foreign prayers, while holding her hands over the savage.
Surprisingly the boy was made calm whenever she did this, but as soon as she stopped, the boy reverted back to his savage self.

"I suppose it's worth a try."


"Hey! Server!"
Robin rushed over to the angry customer.

"I reckon you want more joy juice?"

"No!" spat out the unshaved thug.
"I want yer ter tell that damned Indian ter stop messing with the wild boy. She's blocking my view!"

"Well, Mr. Stone figures that as long as she's helping him..."
The half-drunk thug stood up and jabbed a bony finger into Robin's chest.

"Well, I figure that since I'm the one that picked off the Bunko artist, I should be the one who decides what happens ter the wild boy.
And I don't want that Indian messing with the loco boy. It'll be worthless if it's not savage anymore."
Raven, the medicine woman, seemed to notice the commotion. She turned toward them and said

"'Iiniziin ti'hooniih nichi."

"Hobble your lip you mudsill!"
Raven got up and went over to them. Setting her hand on the thug's shoulder, she repeated the words.
"Iiniziin ti'hooniih nichi.."

"Keep your muck forks off me!"
The thug took out his gun and shot her in the chest.
Raven fell backward, but was caught by Starfire before she hit the ground.

"What do you reckon you're doing!" shouted Robin

"Mind your lip, boy."

"Don't raise sand Robin." advised Starfire." But Robin refused to let the the thug get away with the shooting.

"Now listen here, bucko, you can't just come in here and shoot up the place."

"Sonny, I reckon you owe me a apology for what you'd just there said."

"I ain't making cattle fences with you after what I'd just seen you do."

"If you're going ter defend her, then you're going ter pay through the nose. The two of us are gonna have a row right now.
You best hope that you're the apple pie order with the gun. Come on outside, and we'll duel."

"I can't. I can't 'cause..." Robin searched for an excuse. "Cause I'm not heeled."

"Well, I'm sure Billy here will be more than willing ter let you borrow his rod."
Billy nervously unholstered his gun and slid it over to Robin. Robin turned the gun over in his hands. Not so sure of himself now.

"You aren't yellow are you? Are you gonna fight me? Or are you going take French leave?"

"I ain't no yellow belly. I'd gladly fight you."
The thug laughed.

"Great! I'll be outside waiting. Yer best say your good byes to your piece of Palico."
Once the thug left, Starfire carefully set down Raven, and ran over to Robin.

"You don't wanna mess with that fella, he's a real curly wolf especially when he's half seas over. There still time for you to pull foot."
Robin rejected her idea of running away.

"I accepted his challenge. I have to go face him like a thoroughbred would."


Robin stood back to back with the thug. It was already decided how the fight would pan out.
Ten paces, as counted out by the thug, then turn and shoot.
While this was explained to him, Robin practiced drawing out the gun from its holster. Filling everyone who bet for Robin with regret.
A pistol was shot into the air signaling for the duel to begin. They walked at a quick pace, but Robin's mind was racing so fast that each second seemed to last forever.

"One!"
Should I turn to the left or right?

"Two!"
Left, that way my right arm will be in position to shoot.

"Three!"
Why don't I just turn and shoot now? That would be much easier.

"Four!"
But I'd look mighty silly if I missed. Plus, he didn't turn to shoot me.

"Five!"
That Starfire is pretty cute. I bet she'll give me a kiss if I win. Good enough motivation as any.

"Six!"
It's too bad I don't have cowboy hat that would've been cool. It's also too bad that I couldn't find some peaceful way to settle things with this guy.

"Seven!"
I don't think I can go through with this. I've never shot at a person before.

"Eight!"
The Lone Ranger will give me strength. Finally a reason to wear my mask.

"Nine!"
*William Tell Overture plays in Robin's head*

"Ten!"
Robin turned. But only halfway so that he became a smaller target.
By a stroke of luck, he managed to draw his gun without much fumbling. He swung his arm up, took aim, and fired.
The thug did all of this too, but he pulled the trigger half a second earlier.

/ /
Iiniziin ti'hooniih nichi. = Evil wishes/anger/malevolence hurts you.
OR Evil wishes/anger/malevolence are causing you to suffer.
Though the sentence structure is probably terrible.
I'm surprised that there aren't any available automatic translators for any of the Native American languages.