Author's note: At first I wasn't sure how this story was going over since it only has 2 reviews. And I was like :( but then I saw that people had added it to their favs and alerts without reviewing and I was like :D So it's all good.

Special shout out to DustMan for adding me and my stories to his favorites list. Thank you soooo much! :)

Remember Amy looks like this: cutestkittenever .tumblr .com /post/104605072/kitten-via-artolog (take out the spaces between the cutestkittenever and .tumblr and .com to see it.) Seriously, how could anyone resist that?


The rest of the week went by without a hitch. Archer and Toad were sent out on a 2 day mission in the middle of the week and Roach promised to watch Amy while they were gone. When they returned Toad could tell that Archer was using every ounce of self restraint he possessed to not just rush to their room and make sure Amy was still there. She was, of course, fine. He had turned into some over protective, fussing mother hen. Archer, Mr. stoic, now a mother hen. It was ridiculous and Toad was still trying to figure out how to deal with it. Sure it was great having Archer be in a good mood practically all the time, but on some level Toad hoped they would get caught and Archer would go back to being normal. Little did he know, that would happen sooner than he thought.


Archer was sitting on his bed pulling his boots on, getting ready for training, when Roach suddenly burst through the door, a look of panic on his face.

"There's… gonna be… an inspection… today!" he said, bent over, hands on his knees, gasping for air.

"What?" Archer barked.

"Ghost… said there was… gonna be one. Phew!" Gary straightened up.

"The fuck are we gonna do?" asked Toad, running a hand through his hair nervously.

Roach just shook his head, still trying to catch his breath. He looked over at Archer. Archer was staring at the floor as Amy played with his boot strings, chewing on his bottom lip, his brow furrowed.

"Archer! Do something!" Toad cried, throwing his hands in the air.

Archer ran a hand down his face. "The hell am I supposed to do?" he growled, glaring up at Toad.

"I don't know, but it's your fault we're in this fucking mess in the first place!" Toad pointed an accusing finger at Archer.

Archer stood up angrily. "What was I supposed to do when I found her, eh mate? Leave her there?"

Toad took a few steps towards Archer. "Take her to MacTavish like you were supposed to!" he said, frustration seeping into his voice.

Roach glanced back and forth between the two snipers, hazel eyes wide, unsure if he should interfere.

"I couldn't do that," said Archer, looking away from Toad.

"Why the hell not? It's just a fucking cat Archer!"

Archer's eyes flashed dangerously and then as if on cue, Amy began to meow. Archer reached down and picked her up. He held her close. "You wouldn't understand."

Toad laughed bitterly. "I would if you would fucking talk to me, instead of shutting everyone out."

Archer just looked away, conflicting emotions bubbling in his chest. There was a heavy silence as no one spoke. Gary finally cleared his throat awkwardly.

"Why don't we just take her to training with us?" he suggested.

"Are you out of your mind?" Toad yelled.

Roach snorted. "No. Look, Archer's hid her in his pants pockets before right?"

"Yes," grunted Toad, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Well… let's just do that again. When he runs the pit, one of us will take her. Then when he comes back, we give her back."

Toad pursed his lip, thinking. He closed his eyes and shook his head. "We're so getting caught."

"Come on," said Gary with a frown. "We're part of an elite task force, surely we can hide a kitten." He cocked his head at Archer. "What do you think?"

Archer sighed. "We'll just have to try it."

Toad pinched the bridge of his nose. "Oh my God, I can't believe I'm agreeing to this. Okay fine, let's give it a try."

Gary grinned. "See? Not so hard." He slapped Toad on the back. "We'll be fine." Toad just sighed in exasperation. "But… first things first. We really need to get rid of that litter box."


Gary shifted nervously as he watched Archer run the pit. He had already run the course and Amy was currently in one of his pockets. Toad had told Gary he was going to keep Amy in his pocket since it was his idea. Thankfully the only really physical training they had all done together had been a jog around the base. Archer had simply been slower than normal in an attempt to not hurt Amy. Toad had given him shit to try and keep up appearances and thankfully no one asked any questions. Ghost was no where to been seen as he was the one doing the inspections.

Archer appeared in the door of the observation area, panting slightly. He looked over at Roach with questioning eyes. Roach gave him a small, barely noticeable nod. So far so good.

"Nice job, Archer," said MacTavish. "40 seconds."

Toad groaned. "How the hell am I supposed to beat that?"

Archer just shrugged. He walked over to stand next to Gary and took the water bottle he offered him. He took a long swig as Toad walked down to the pit. They watched as Toad picked his weapon and walked up to the starting line.

"Ready…" said MacTavish through the mic. "Go!"

Toad took off into the pit. However, Roach and Archer weren't really paying attention as they were trying to get Amy back into Archer's pocket. Amy gave a small howl as Archer shoved her back into his pocket. Gary cast a worried glance at MacTavish, but he was focused on Toad and it seemed like he hadn't heard Amy.

MacTavish sighed and ran a hand through his mohawk as Toad finished up the pit. "Too slow," he mumbled. "Archer," he said turning to the sniper.

"Yes sir?"

"Is something going on with Toad?"

Archer stiffened slightly, thinking of Amy. "Not that I know of, sir."

"Hmmm."

Toad came up onto the observation deck, looking slightly distressed. "What was my time, sir?" he asked, taking the water bottle Archer passed him.

"Too slow," grunted MacTavish. "62 seconds."

"Fuck," muttered Toad, looking away angrily.

"Better luck next time, mate," said Archer, clapping him on the shoulder.

Toad just grunted.

The three of them made there way off the observation deck as the next group came to run the pit. They headed for the shooting range, as that's where their last set of training exercises for the day would be. Archer was relived that it was almost over. After this he would be able to drop Amy off in their room before heading to lunch.

During shooting practice Archer could feel Amy trembling against his leg, the noise of all the guns scaring her. He hoped this day wouldn't traumatize her too much. That was the last thing he wanted. With her there he was incredibly distracted and kept missing targets. Toad took the opportunity to rip him apart. Archer didn't take it personally, but it was beginning to grate on him. It could have been called teasing, but there was a shaper, bitter undertone to it. Archer suspected it had something to do with the little spat that morning.

When training was over the inspection results were announced. Losers would have extra training the next day and winners would get to take it easy. As usual, Scarecrow and Rook's room was the messiest. It didn't seem to matter how many times they lost, their room still remained a mess. Surprisingly, Archer and Toad were the winners. Toad seemed well and truly shocked. Generally Royce and Ozone kept their room impeccable. Whatever had happened, Archer was grateful for it. So far today had been stressful and it was nice to know a small break was coming his way.

As the men dispersed, Archer, Toad and Roach hung around and chatted. Archer really wanted to get back to their room and drop Amy off, but he didn't want to look suspicious, so he hung around. As they were talking Ghost walked up to them.

"Congratulations mates," he said nodding at Toad and Archer.

"Thanks," said Toad. Archer nodded.

"How was the pit this morning?"

"Good," said Archer.

Gary shrugged. "Alright."

"Fucking sucked," said Toad miserably.

Ghost just chuckled. "There's always next time, mate."

"I suppose…"

"You headed to the mess hall for lunch?"

The three of them nodded. "Just headed over there," said Gary.

"Before you go, Archer, may I have a word with you?" Ghost walked back towards the pit.

Gary and Toad exchanged worried looks as Archer followed him. They reluctantly headed towards the mess hall.

"Something the matter, sir?" asked Archer crossing his arms over his chest.

"You could say that," said Ghost

Archer raised an eye brow.

"While your room was the cleanest, I found something very interesting in it."

"What was that?"

"There was cat hair on the blanket on your bed."

Archer stiffened and tried not to let the shock and fear show on his face. But he wasn't sure he did a good enough job as he swore he could see Ghost smirk under his balaclava. "You sure it was cat hair?"

"Yes." Ghost raised an eye brow, asking the silent question, "Are you really questioning me?"

"Are you insinuating that I have a cat in my room when I know pets aren't allowed on base?" asked Archer, his voice, thankfully, even.

"I'm not insinuating anything, mate. I know you have a cat in your room."

Archer shook his head and tried to sound convincing. "I don't."

He saw Ghost roll his eyes behind his sunglasses. "Bloody hell, Archer, don't pull this shite with me. It's obvious. Now where are you keeping it?"

Amy, having the worst timing ever, choose that moment to start meowing. Archer's eyes widened in horror and Ghost crossed his arms over his chest.

"Well that proves it now doesn't it mate?" said Ghost smugly.

Archer looked away, his shoulders tight and tense. This was it then. Amy would soon be gone…

"So what should I do about it?"

Archer looked back at Ghost, frowning in confusion. Ghost just stood there, his head cocked to one side as if contemplating something. Archer just shrugged, unable to bring himself to say anything. Ghost was watching him intently, the grinning skull on his balaclava making it more intimidating than it already was. Amy began meowing louder, probably hungry.

"She sounds little."

"Yeah…" said Archer softly. He reached down and pulled Amy out of his pocket. He stroked her head and she calmed down and began purring. He saw Ghost's eyes soften behind his sunglasses.

"Bloody hell, she's a cute bugger."

Archer just nodded. He was having a hard time speaking as conflicting emotions bubbled in his chest. He was caught between the need to not look weak and not wanting Amy to be taken away. He was somewhat unsure as to how he had ended up so attached to her.

Ghost took a couple of steps forward and reached out, scratching behind Amy's ears. "How long have ya had her?"

"About a week."

"That long eh?" Ghost sighed. "She got a name?"

"Amy."

"So that's it then? You've gotten attached to her."

Archer looked away, unable to hold Ghost's intense gaze. He felt weak and it wasn't exactly a comfortable feeling.

"Tell ya what mate, I won't tell MacTavish you have her. But if he asks…"

"You'll tell him. I understand." Archer was utterly relieved that Ghost was going to go along with this. "Thank you."

"No problem," said Ghost, slapping him on the back. "Now get the little bugger to your room and get down to the mess hall for lunch."

"Yes sir."


Later that evening Roach was in Archer and Toad's room with them playing with Amy. Archer and him were sitting on the floor taking turns pulling a string across the floor for Amy to chase. Toad was sitting on his bed, watching them.

"So Ghost found out eh?" said Roach as he pulled the string around his knee and Amy chased after it.

Archer nodded watching as Amy turned around and dashed around the other side of Roach, trying to outsmart the string.

"Hey that's not fair," said Roach, pouting as Amy caught the string. "So what'd he say?"

Archer took the string from Roach and dangled it above Amy's head. "That he won't tell MacTavish unless he asks." Amy hopped and leaped after the string.

"You think he'll ask?"

Archer just shrugged as Amy caught the string in her mouth. He dropped it, letting her chew on it for a while.

"How'd he find out?" Toad piped up.

"Cat hair on my bed."

Roach wiggled his fingers above Amy and she promptly jumped up from chewing on the string and began attacking his hand. "She shed that much in a week?"

"Guess so."

Toad sighed. "Guess we should have washed it half way through the week."

"At least you don't have to worry about it now that Ghost knows," said Roach as Amy flipped onto her back. "Since, you know, he does the inspections."

He grabbed her belly, his hand engulfing her and gently shook her. She chewed on his hand. Her ears suddenly went back and she seemed irritated that Roach was holding her down.

"Yeowch!" Roach yelped as Amy bite him hard.

He let her go and she jumped up and skittered across the room. She pranced around and then began chasing some invisible thing that only she could see. Toad scratched the back of his head and watched her with a frown.

"Are all cats this spazzy?" he asked.

Roach laughed. "It sure seems like it." He cocked his head in curiosity. "You've never had a cat?"

Toad shook his head. "We weren't allowed to have pets when I was young."

"Aww that's sad."

Amy was now attacking and rolling around in one of Toad's shirts. She suddenly jumped up from it and hopped away from it, back arched.

"What about you Archer? You have pets when you were little?"

Archer nodded. "We always had a cat around. Mum loves 'em. You?"

"Shit yeah," said Roach with a grin. "We've had Sassy(1) and Trigger(2) since I was nine."

"Cats?" asked Toad.

"Sassy is. She's a snotty little Siamese. Trigger's a golden retriever."

Amy jumped up onto Toad's bed and meowed at him. He raised eye brow and watched as she climbed into his lap. She stood up, placing her little white front paws on his chest and took a whack at his dog tags.

"They, uh, they get along then?" asked Toad as he leaned back slightly from Amy, a look of uncertainty on his face.

Archer couldn't help smiling slightly as he watched his partner shift nervously on his bed. He really didn't know how to handle cats. Or maybe it was because she was a baby, Archer wasn't sure.

"Oh yeah they get along fine." Roach grinned. "Cause Sassy's in charge. Trigger cow tows to her majesty."

"Why's that?"

"We got Sassy first, so she was head hancho. She just smacks Trigger when he gets out of line."

Toad winced as Amy climbed up onto his shoulder, digging her claws into him. When she finally got up she meowed at him. Archer watched in amusement as Toad cringed when she started licking his face. He tentatively reached up and petted her. She started purring and Toad relaxed, his face breaking into a smile.

Roach's stomach suddenly growled loudly. Archer looked at him, one eye brow raised and he laughed nervously.

"Guess I'm hungry."

Toad looked over at his clock. "Shit, it's dinner time already?"

"We should go get some grub," said Roach standing up, Archer following suit.

There's was a knock at the door startling Amy and she jumped off Toad's shoulder and scurried under his bed. Toad got up and opened the door.

"Oh, Ghost hey," said Toad opening the door wider.

"Mate," said Ghost nodding curtly. "Came to check on the little bugger."

Amy suddenly trotted up to Toad and rubbed on his leg. Ghost chuckled.

"Doin' fine, aren't ya little one," said Ghost reaching down to pick her up.

Amy skittered away from him and into the hall. Ghost cursed and turned around to try and get her. A door slammed down the hall as someone came out of their room and Amy took off down the hall. Archer panicked and shoved past Ghost, running after Amy. He cursed as he wondered how the hell she could be so fast with how little she was. Chemo was at the end of the hall, opening the door to the outside.

"CHEMO!" Ghost bellowed behind him. "Grab that cat!"

"What?" said Chemo, a confused look on his face.

He looked down and his mouth dropped open in shock as Amy ran out the door. Archer rushed past him and his heart jumped into his throat and then dropped into his stomach as he saw Amy heading for the mess hall. He pushed his legs to go faster. They were nearly to the mess hall when Royce opened the door.

"Royce!" he yelled.

He paused, holding the door open. "What?"

Amy ran right past him into the mess hall, Archer on her heels. He ignored Royce, as he stared at them in confused shock, focused entirely on catching Amy before something happened to her.

She ran under one table and then leaped up into Ace's lap and then onto another table. Ace gave a startled yelp. It freaked Amy out and she ran down the middle of the table. Archer ran around the long table trying to intercept her before she could jump to the next one. Jester walked between the tables as Amy jumped for it. She sunk her claws into his arm and pulled herself up onto his shoulder.

"What the hell!" he yelled, staring in shock as the kitten leapt from his shoulder onto the next table.

Archer saw that she was trying to make it to the open door to the kitchen at the other end of the table. He dove and slid down the length of the table, sending food and drinks flying. Just before she leapt off the table Archer reached out and caught her. He slid to a stop at the end of the table.

"Bloody hell!" yelled MacTavish as his food tray was dumped into his lap. "ARCHER! What in the fucking hell is going on!" he bellowed.

Archer swallowed hard as he realized he was in deep shite. Amy squirmed in his grip and meowed. MacTavish's ice blue eyes widened in surprise as he saw her.

"Is that… is that a cat?"

Archer pulled himself into an upright position and quickly got off the table. He stood stiffly in front of MacTavish, covered in food, Amy held close to his chest. "Yes sir."

The Captain's eye twitched and he pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing heavily. "Archer… I would have expected this from Toad, but not you." He dropped his hand and looked at Archer. "You know pets aren't allowed on base."

"Yes sir." Archer kept his face neutral, but inside he was mortified. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Toad, Roach and Ghost walk up next to them. Toad looked like he was caught between wanting to laugh and being mortified. Gary looked absolutely horrified and Ghost was unreadable as ever, arms crossed over his chest.

MacTavish held out his hand. "Give me the cat."

Archer stiffened and leaned away from MacTavish slightly, his grip on Amy tightening. She began to meow louder. "No sir."

There was a pregnant pause as the entire mess hall went deathly quiet.

MacTavish ground his teeth together. "Archer, I order you to give me the cat."

Archer looked at him, defiance in his eyes. But he could see that MacTavish was becoming more and more pissed with every second. He grit his teeth and reluctantly handed Amy over to him. MacTavish held the kitten firmly in his big hand. She swatted at his hand and he frowned. He grabbed her by the scruff of her neck and she mewled pitifully. Archer couldn't help the look of pain that flashed across his face. MacTavish must have seen it, because he quickly went back to holding Amy in his hand.

"Now, get yourself cleaned up. Then you will come back here and clean this mess up." He gestured at the food covered table and floor with his free hand. "Is that clear?"

"Yes sir."

"Good." With that, MacTavish strode past Archer and walked out of the mess hall.

Archer stood there tensely, hands balled into tight fists. Ghost shook his head and followed the Captain out of the mess hall. Toad and Roach edged their way closer to Archer.

"Wow Archer, way to make a fucking mess," Meat said snidely.

Archer whirled around, his green eyes flashing dangerously. "What'd you say?" he growled.

Meat shrunk away from the anger in his eyes. "Nothing."

"Good."

Toad placed a hand on Archer's shoulder. "Hey man, you okay?" he said quietly.

"Fine," Archer grunted, shrugging off Toad's hand. "Bloody wonderful." He ran a hand through his reddish brown hair and made a disgusted face when he realized there was spaghetti sauce in his hair. He sighed heavily and stalked out of the mess hall.

"This fucking sucks," said Gary miserably as they watched Archer go.

Toad just nodded. There was something deeper going on with Archer and he was going to find out.


(1) This is a tribute to Sassy from the movie Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey.
(2) My cousin has a golden retriever named Trigger, so that's where this came from. He's crazy, but awesome.

Author's note: I know, I know, that whole chase scene seems somewhat unrealistic. But believe me that can happen. When we first got my kitten, Sweetie, we had to keep her separate from the other cat, Holly, because Holly wanted to eat Sweetie. o.O So anytime we tried to leave a room Sweetie would actively try to get out. So yeah, Amy just wanted out. lolololol That's what I'm sticking with anyway.
I was inspired by the songs "Firecracker" and "Trailerhood" by Josh Turner and "Over My Head" by Lit from the Titan A.E. soundtrack for the chase scene. :D Everything else was written to Josh Turner songs and two Japanese pop bands called Yui and Perfume.

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! Constructive criticism always appreciated!