A few cups of coffee later, Kate still sat on his couch in the same position she was in before, but now with a blanket thrown over her lap. "I don't think that I can afford to lose them right now, Rick."
A while later it was finally time for Kate to go. The hours they had spent together were, in her mind, perfect. She needed that sense of comfort, and he was still the only person that could provide her with that.
"Thank you" she whispered, pressing her lips to his cheek. "I needed that."
"Anytime, Kate. Hey, even if you just want to talk, you call me up, alright?"
Kate smiled and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "Bye, Rick."
She hated law school. To her, nothing about law school felt like it was right for her. And after her conversation with Rick about her life before the accident, Kate Beckett felt like that was where she belonged. She needed the precinct. She needed to bring justice for those who have lost their voice. She didn't need to be a lawyer. She needed to be a detective.
"Dad, I'm moving back into the city."
Jim Beckett looked up from his paper, his eyes wide with fear, his hands trembling. "I can't lose you again Katie." He dropped everything and stood up, moving quickly toward his daughter. "Just, tell me what I can do so I don't lose you."
"You won't lose me Dad. This is just something I need to do. I need to find myself. Not who everyone else wants me to be. Just, myself."
He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tight. "I love you, Katie. I always have, and I'll never stop."
She quickly hugged him back. "I love you too, Dad."
"Captain, I want to come back." Kate held her jacket in her trembling hands, though on her face she looked unfazed by her fear.
Gates pulled her glasses off of her face and looked up at Kate. "Detective, I would be honored, but what makes you think that you are ready for this?"
"I just know, Sir. I tried to go back to law school but it just… wasn't for me. Just walking back into this precinct makes me feel like I belong. I can't not work here, Captain. Look, I took the test and passed with flying colors. And the boys took me down to the range." She fumbled through her bag and pulled out the shooting range target, passing it over into Gate's open hand.
"Very impressive" Gates nodded, setting her glasses back on to look over everything Kate had handed her. "You're on probation, Detective. You hear me? I don't want you out in the field until you get everything back together. Or, your memory comes back. How is that going, by the way?"
"Good, Sir. I feel a lot better after the accident. Still no memory, but bits and pieces have come back. Things that I needed to remember. Everyone's been helping me too. Telling stories and things. Hopefully soon it will be back."
Gates smiled and nodded at her. "You can return in two weeks. And, tell that writer of yours he's welcome back too. Don't tell him this, but… sometimes I miss his annoying antics around here."
Kate smiled and ran a hand through her hair. "Will do, Sir, if I see him. Thank you very much."
His eyes shut for a moment as he leaned against the wall of the elevator. He wouldn't see any of them for two months. One stupid phone call, and Paula and Gina had him going on a three-week book tour throughout Europe. The elevator doors opened up on the homicide floor and Rick walked out, two boxes of donuts and pastries in his arms.
"Hey, look who it is!" Ryan called out, looking up from his desk.
"Hey bro. Long time no see" Espo smiled, pushing away from his desk to go to Castle. "And I'll take these." He pulled the two boxes from Castle's arms and escaped quickly to the break room to tear into the boxes with Karpowski.
Rick grabbed a seat next to Ryan's desk and started talking about recent cases and why he was there. Into their conversation, he got sidetracked as he heard the familiar sound of high-heeled boots clicking across the precinct floor. "Wh-" he questioned as he looked up. His eyes locked onto Kate Beckett as she strutted across the precinct floor, coming from the upstairs gym and going to her desk, not seeing Rick.
She spun at the sound of her name, her eyes falling to him. "Rick? W-what are you doing here?"
"I brought food for the boys and… Wait, what are you doing here in the city? I thought that you were back at your parents?"
"Um… no" she mumbled, running a hand through her hair. "I moved back into the city about two months ago."
"Oh, really?" Castle smiled at her. "That's amazing, Kate. I'm glad you're back. I had just come by to drop some food off for the boys, you know, see how they're doing. I usually stop by every once and a while. I… um… I actually came buy to say goodbye for a little."
Kate's eyes widened and hurt flashed through them. "You're leaving?"
"Yeah. Paula and Gina want me on a book tour through Western Europe for the next three weeks. London, Paris, and Berlin. One week in each, a book signing each day. So, what are you doing here?"
She ran a hand through her hair and looked down. "Actually, I came and asked for my job back."
"You did? Kate, what happened to law school?"
"I dropped out. Look, Rick, do you want to go get a cup of coffee or lunch?"
"Definitely. Now, or…?
Kate looked over to at the break room; watching and laughing some as the boys and her other friends devoured the things Castle brought them. "Soon, okay? I want to see everyone first."
They joined their friends in the break room for donuts, coffee, and laughs. Though Kate's memory had not returned, she was finally beginning to feel a sense of normalcy being with her friends, especially with no one treating her like a sick person.
When the boys had to get back to work, Kate and Castle left to go to Remy's.
"So, what made you decide to come home?"
Kate smiled and took a small sip of her strawberry milkshake. "Home. It's funny. You know, part of me feels like I don't have a home anymore." There was a pause, before she started up again. "I missed you. A lot. You know, I don't remember much of anything still, but all of those sleepless nights lying in a bed at my parent's house just made me miss you. And I don't know why, because I really don't remember our relationship. So, I was hoping that you could… I don't know. I moved back here two months ago to start over, but you were still missing. I can't count the amount of times I picked up the phone and dialed your number, but I just couldn't hit send."
"No, listen Castle. I don't know why I miss you so much, but I do. So, please, help me. Either help me remember, or help me forget. Because, I can't lose another night of sleep over this."
Tears had begun to form in her eyes. Kate dropped her head quickly to shield them, bringing a hand up to wipe her eyes.
"Kate, look at me." Castle reached his hand out and took hers into his hand. "Kate, come on."
She sucked in a deep breath and looked up at him.
"I want to help you remember. You deserve to know everything that happened between us. The good and the bad, but it is mostly good. I'm going to do everything I can to help you remember. I promise. But, Kate, honey… You should come with me."
"Come with you?"
I can't apologize enough for this taking so long. I'm sorry. But alas, summer has begun, and so will the updates.