Disclaimer: Yeah, it's not mine.
They all sat around in silence. I knew what they were all thinking. They were all judging each other. Just like they judged me everyday. I'm stuck here. I'll always be stuck here. Another year went by. Still no progress. It's not like they're going to help. It's not like they know. I'm just Cat. I'm just that girl who they have to be friends with simply because I won't let them get away. I liked Tori. I knew that she would help me in some ways. I knew that I couldn't flat-out tell her my situation… But she could help. I knew she could.
Tori's my dad's best friend. I remember her from his stories. He'd always talk to me before I went to sleep. He'd color pictures with me and sing me lullabies before bed. He loved my momma too. They were always so affectionate around each other. I hated it so much. I'd always wanted them to just go to separate corners of the living room and stay there until I left. But now… now I'd do anything for them to kiss each other.
My momma. She was a great mother. She'd smooth down my hair whenever I woke up and help me get ready for school. She was my best friend. She'd always worn clip-in colored hair extensions. And I guess she does now too. She'd even bought me some for my fifth birthday. I remember them… They were bright red. I'd begged momma to let me dye my whole head that color. It took a little pleading on my part, but it was worth it. I loved my red hair.
My life was perfect. It was more than perfect. I'd had a family who loved me. I'd had a family who loved each other. It was just me and momma and dad. I miss being in my dad's arms when I was upset. I miss singing Billy Joel songs with my momma during our Summer road trips. I miss shuddering at momma and dad whenever they kissed. That was my life. And I just miss it.
It's not the same here. I know that it's a sign from God. I should've been a better person. I shouldn't have been mean to that little boy. He had just wanted a friend and I should've been one to him. I know what it's like to be an outsider now. No one really wants to be my friend here. I'm just Cat. I made fun of that little boy's hair. It was all frizzy. And I had mocked his glasses too. How he smelled. I shouldn't have been so mean to him.
I knew that this was my payback deep down. Words speak louder than actions. I knew that God had placed me back in time to teach me a lesson. It's not nice to be mean. I get it now, God. Why am I still here? I promise I've learned my lesson. People are cruel. They're even crueler in this era. I've been here for eight years. Eight torturous years of being placed into this random family. I have a brother in this era. I don't get to see him much. He's always in his room. He always has a paper bag over his head. Almost like he's ashamed of himself.
I caught him without the bag on once.
He had been reading something. I came into his room without knocking. I had figured since the door was partially opened, it wouldn't hurt. He had freaked out. I saw what he looked like, though. He was screaming at me to get out, but I just stood there in shock. He had brown, shaggy hair that hung over his eyes. But his eyes shown through in a bright shade of gray… If that's even possible. His face had a few marks on it. I assume some were from acne, but one was a big gash right below his eye. It looked like a scar that had been there for a while. It was barely visible, but I was studying him deeply at the time.
And then I had been forcefully removed by his foot. I guess my parents here, Lisa and Matt, aren't that bad. I mean… They feed me and make sure I'm properly clothed. They wake me up and buy me decorations for my room. But sometimes I think that I'm just their job. It's like they look after me for a day, go to bed, wake up and start off with an another-day-another-daughter-to-look-after attitude. They don't love me like momma and dad did.
And my momma and dad aren't speaking.