I threw myself across the stage, singing the lyrics into the microphone. The heat was almost unbearable at Warped but I wanted to put on the best show I could for our kids besides we only had a week left and 5 shows left.
'That's what you get when you let your heart win!' I sang, then jammed the mic in the direction of the crowd.
'WOAAHHHH!' they all sang back to me.
'Now I can't trust myself with anything but this….' I sang.
We finished up the song, 'How you guys doing out there?' I said, they cheered.
'Okay so this is our last song, thanks so much for coming out today. This is Born for This and I want to hear you singing with all you got!'
The crowd screamed as the guys burst into the into to the song.
'Oh no I just keep on falling!' I sang, and then pointed the mic at them mouthing the lyrics.
'Back to the same old!' they sang
When the song got to the guitar solo near the end I smiled and started to head bang, my hair flying all over the place. I skipped over to Taylor, who was deep in the guitar solo and grinned at him. He smiled back briefly before concentrating on getting all the notes right. He had been working so hard lately, he had to learn all the lead parts to the songs since Josh had left. Then I ran over to Jeremy, I rested my elbow on his shoulder.
'We were born for this!' I finished.
We waved to the kids and headed from the stage, I grabbed my half full bottle of water and threw it into the audience. I don't know why the kids liked it when we did that, I guess they could sell them on e-bay. I ran off stage and grabbed a new bottle of water. Chugging back half of it in one go. We were in Florida and it was mid-July, so trust me, it was unbelievably hot. We got back to the bus and I grabbed some fresh clothes from my bag throwing the sweaty ones into the bag of laundry. I pulled a brush through my red hair and pulled it back into a messy pony tail. I headed into the living area, Jeremy was asleep on the couch and Taylor was sitting looking at him evilly a pen in his hand, he looked up at me, I laughed.
'Give me one!' I said and he threw me a pen. I started to carefully draw a moustache on Jerm's upper lip. Taylor drawing a dick on his cheek, I laughed and we stood back to admire our work. I took out my phone and snapped a picture of him.
'That's going on twitter.' I said opening it up.
When we me and itstayloryall get bored, shit goes down. I attached the pic of Jeremy and pressed tweet.
I sat down and watched as people started to reply, I loved fans. I laughed at some of them and re-tweeted a couple that made me laugh a lot. I peered out the window, most fans seemed to have gone home, it was probably safe to go outside now. I opened the door and Jeremy woke up.
'Have fun Tay!' I called and ran out the bus. I started walking then two seconds later the door burst open, Jeremy standing there. I shot him an innocent smile. He started to run towards me. I dashed away, pelting as fast as I could away from him.
'Hayley, you are goanna pay for this!' he yelled laughing 'Get over here!'
'Never!' I screamed back, laughing and dashed down in between two buses.
There was a huge car park for all the bands tour buses, they all had the names of the bands written down the side or their logos. I started to dash in and out of buses, losing Jeremy in the maze of buses. I turned around to see if he was still chasing me, I ran straight into someone, who coming out of a bus.
'Sorry!' I said
'It's fine.' Said the guy, I looked up at him and seeing it was just Alex I relaxed. 'Why are you running? Parawhores casing you?' he said making fun of the name
'No,' I said laughing 'Me and Taylor kinda drew on Jeremy while he was sleeping and he's chasing me.'
'Oh right, okay.' Alex said laughing.
'Aha!' I heard Jeremy call from behind me, I spun round and saw him standing a few of metres from us.
'Gotta go Gaskarth!' I called running away.
'Bye Hayley' he called and I heard him laughing as I dashed down another row of buses.
When Jeremy finally caught me, we spent a half hour in the bathroom, scrubbing the pictures of his face, once we were done we headed back to the bus.
'He caught you then?' I heard someone yell, I spun round to see Alex standing at the ATL bus with Jack.
'Yeah, he's a fast runner!' I called smiling and running my fingers through my hair.
Alex and Jack laughed and I headed back onto our bus. I got ready for bed quickly and climbed into my bunk, smiling to myself. I pulled the covers around me, pulling my knees into my chest, curling into a ball and drifting off to sleep. I woke up suddenly as the bus lurched into movement, we must have been heading to our new destination, which I'm pretty sure was somewhere in Ohio? I sighed and snuggled against my pillow, I'm pretty sure I wasn't getting back to sleep. Grumbling to myself I crept out of bed, and tip toed down the bus to the living area I flopped down on the couch, flicking on the small light. I squinted at the clock, 6am. Great. I started just letting my imagination take me, my mind wandering over various thoughts. It came to Josh and Zac. I bit down on my lip, it still hurt to talk about. I ran back to my bunk and started scribbling down my feelings. i sat there for ages just writing. I was almost done when Tay walked in.
'Mornin' Hayles.' He said, yawning 'What you doing?'
'Just writing.' I said, finished the last line.
'Really? Can I see?' he said
'Sure.' I handed him the book.
'Can you sing it to me?' he said reading over the page.
'You were my conscience, so solid now you're like water. We started drowning, not like we'd sink any further. I let my heart go, it's somewhere down at the bottom. I'll get a new one and come back for the hope that you've stolen. I'll stop the whole world, I'll stop the whole world, from turning into a monster, eating us alive. Don't you ever wonder how we'd survive? But now that you're gone the world is ours. I'm only human, I've got a skeleton in me. I'm not the villain, despite what you're always preaching. Call me a traitor, I'm just collecting your victims. They're getting stronger, I hear them calling. I'll stop the whole world, I'll stop the whole worldfrom turning into a monster, eating us alive. Don't you ever wonder how we'd survive? But now that you're gone the world is ours. You found strength and solutions, I liked the tension And not always knowing the answers when you're goanna lose it, you're goanna lose it. I'll stop the whole world, I'll stop the whole world from turning into a monster, eating us alive. Don't you ever wonder how we'd survive? But now that you're gone the world is, ours.' I sang.
People had started to walk in while I was singing, curious about what was going on.
'Hayley, that's so awesome!' Jerm said grinning.
'Thanks.' I said, blushing.
The morning passed by pretty quickly, before I knew it we had arrived in Ohio. We were due to start our stet in 20 minutes. I quickly grabbed my clothes and put on make up before heading outside to our stage.
'Good luck Williams!' I heard someone call, I looked around to see the All Time Low guys heading towards their stage.
'Thanks Gaskarth, you too!' I yelled back, he smiled at me and winked, the bassist Zack rolled his eyes at Alex and I frowned slightly. I waved to them and headed to our stage.
I dashed out onto the stage 'What's up Ohio!' the crowds screamed in response. 'Right so the first song we are goaana do today is called Ignorance!'
The guys started to play the into and I ran around the stage flipping my hair around. The song was around half way through and I looked out into the crowd, I caught sight of some dude punching another one. I ran over to Taylor and pointed at them, he shrugged.
'Pause!' I said, the guys frowned and stopped playing. 'Is everything okay?' I asked them 'I don't like seeing that. I don't know what that was about but ... uh … What was that about?' I said the guy 'You ok? Is he okay?' I added giving him thumbs up, which he shot back. I looked out to the crowd who was getting restless. I tried to lighten the mood 'Can't we just all get along?' I joked, the crowd started to cheer in agreement. 'I know it's cool to be tough, but it's not really that cool. I mean look at me, I'm not that tough. I mean..' I said pulling up the sleeve of my purple t shirt, I flexed my arm. the crowd creamed. 'That's pretty big but ugh.' I said, I looked back to the guys 'Don't make me come down there. Alright, 2nd verse?' I said turning back to the guys, who started playing from the verse. I turned back to the crowd 'I'm watching you!' I added.
I sat on the grass absorbing the sunlight, I lay back into the soft grass and let out a long sigh, closing my eyes.
'I heard you broke up a fight today?' said a voice, I smiled recognising it.
'Yup, I'm a fucking hero, bow down before me.' I said not opening my eyes.
'Can I sit?' said Alex, I opened one eye. The light was streaming down from behind him, highlighting the red streaks in his hair. His big brown eyes were soft and he had a slightly lopsided smile on him face. My heart gave a twist, and suddenly I was looking at him a whole different way.
'Hayley?' he said, frowning slightly.
'Uh, yeah sure.' I said clearing my throat and sitting up.
He smiled and flopped down next to me. he sat back leaning on his elbows and looked up at the clouds, I started to play with my shoe laces, untying them and then doing them back up again.
'So, how's the tour going?' he said not taking his eyes of the clouds, there was an amazing smile he had on his face, it gave me a warm feeling.
'Alright, it's our first without the Farro's so it's different but it's great to be back on the road again.' I said smiling 'Didn't you just let out a record?' I said, I already knew the answer though I just wanted to keep our conversation flowing.
'Yeah, Dirty Work, it's our first time with a new label.' He said, I smiled at him, it was hard not to.
'YO, Gaskank!' someone yelled, we both spun round and Jack was running towards us.
'Road trip to the beach!' he said, then looked at me 'You can come if you want Hayley? Invite the guys as well.'
'Cool!' I said 'I need a day off, give me and the guys 10 minutes?'
'Okay, meet at the front gates we are taking Matt's van' Jack said, I nodded and ran to our bus.
'Guys we are going to the beach, pack your bags!' I called to Jeremy and Taylor, about 7 minutes later we were ready, I had changed into my black bikini, grey wash denim shorts and a t-shirt on the top. I had shoved a towel, sun block, my book and sunglasses into my bag and I was ready to go. We headed down to the gates and the guys were already there.
'Dammit,' Muttered Jack
'What?' I said
'You're not wearing a bikini.' He said smiling evilly.
'I am, I'm just saving the show for later.' I said winking at him
We all climbed into the van, I was squeezed in between Jeremy and Alex in the back seat. Jack started blasting All Time Low, Alex, Zack and Rian all groaned.
'Put something else on!' Rian said 'It's not right listening to yourself.'
'Fine,' Jack said pushing a button on the stereo and For a Pessimist came on.
'Much better!' Taylor said laughing.
We all started singing along, Jack screaming the chorus and then mumbling the verse he didn't know.
'Okay, I think we should leave it up to the singers to do the singing!' said Zack laughing
'Yeah, you're on guys!' said Jack
'No way!' I said laughing
'Come on, you sing in front of thousands of people at shows but you won't sing for us!' he argued.
'That's different!' I protested
I looked at Hayley, arguing with Jack about singing. Her cheeks were starting to near the colour of her hair. After a while Jack pulled up at the beach, the sand was golden and the water was practically sparkling.
'Wow.' Hayley breathed as she followed me out the car.
We grabbed out bags and headed down onto the sand, it was so hot it practically burned your feet. We set out our towels, me making sure I got next to Hayley, trying not to make it completely obvious. Zack already knew I liked her, I didn't need more people knowing. I sat down on my towel and everyone else did the same. We all sat chatting about band life and what we were doing after Warped. Turns out Paramore were going home for a while, taking time off to be with their families then going on tour on October and coming back for Christmas to write material for their new album.
'I wanna go surfing.' Zack said
'I'll split it with you and we can buy a board?' said Hayley
'Yeah cool!' Zack replied, Hayley reached over and started digging through her bag before pulling out her wallet.
They walked off to the surf shop thing, coming back two minutes later with a surf board. Hayley pulled off her top and shorts, revealing a black swim suit, I really couldn't help but stare. They ran off into the waves, I felt a pang of jealousy in my stomach about Zack. Though I knew he wouldn't try anything on her, he knew I liked her. Zack came back a while later, Hayley still in the water trying to surf.
'I'm hungry, anyone wants to come get some lunch with me?' he said, everyone nodded in agreement standing up.
'You coming Alex?' said Taylor
I watched Hayley as she caught a wave, she smiled at me, distracted for a fraction of a second. The wave flew over the top of her pushing her down into the water. I stood up watching carefully, she hadn't come back up yet. I quickly ran toward her, away from a confused looking Taylor. I ran as fast as I could through the waves ducking down where she had gone under. I opened my eyes, the salt burning in them. I saw her flame hair floating a couple of meters ahead of me. I propelled forward desperately reaching out with my fingers. My hand brushed against her skin, I pushed forward more and wrapped my arms around her waist pulling her close to my chest. I made a break for the surface, my lungs desperate for air. I broke the surface sucking as much air into my lungs as possible and swam for the shore, everyone was standing right at the water's edge looking worried. I made sure she always stayed above the water and I crawled up onto the sand, laying her down on the ground. She was breathing steadily and I let out a sigh of relief. Suddenly she started
If everyone wasn't standing there, I would have kissed Alex right there, he had just saved my life but unfortunately everyone was watching so all I got was questions and "geez Hayley you gave me a heart attack" from Taylor. After I had managed to convince everyone I was fine we headed back to the towels. I wrapped mine tightly around my shoulders, feeling somewhat shook up. I looked up to Alex.
'Thanks.' I said to him' he smiled at me.
'I'm a fucking hero.' He said quoting me 'Bow down before me!'
I laughed and pulled my song book from my bag, trying to take my mind off the fact I could have just died and opened it to my new song. I started tapping the pen on the page, working out a basic drum beat for it. After a while I got bored and it was getting dark so I couldn't read the lyrics anymore.
'We better get back,' said Jeremy looking at his watch.
We all started to put our stuff back in our bags, the wind had started to pick up, the cold air blowing my hair all over my face. I shivered, Alex looked at me and pulled off his hoodie. He handed it to me and I smiled gratefully. I pulled it on, it was warm and smelled like him, it was sort of a sweet smell, it reminded me of summer's in Nashville with Josh but better, I shook my head, trying to shake out memories of him. We walked back to the van and climbed in, Jack had made some bet with Rian and whoever lost was driving home. Rian had lost so I was crammed in between Jack and Alex. I could feel my eye lids getting heavy. I let them shut and instantly fell asleep.
I watched her as she fell asleep, her head rolled over and rested on my shoulder. I smiled to myself, and let her sleep on my shoulder. It was a 3 hour drive back to Warped and most people fell asleep. Jack was next to drift off, his head resting against the window, his mouth wide open I had to stifle a laugh. I'm pretty sure Taylor fell asleep and so did Zack so that just left me, Jeremy and Rian awake for most of the journey. However everyone was awoke when Rian turned the sharp corner into the gates of Warped. Hayley groaned but didn't open her eyes, she just hid her face in my t shirt and wrapped her arms around mine, hugging it. Jeremy gave a laugh,
'She's not very pleasant if you wake her up.' He said shaking his head, I laughed.
'Should we just carry her back to our bus?' said Taylor
'I'll do it, that way she won't really be moved as much cause I'm right next to her.' I said
'Can you carry her to her bunk?' said Jeremy
'Sure.' I said, I scooped her up carefully into my arms, she was quite light and was easy to carry, I guess it was because she was quite small but I loved it, she would fit under my chin perfectly.
'I'll see you guys soon, I have to take sleeping beauty to her chambers.' I said to the guys who nodded, Zack giving me a look, I just winked at him as we walked to the different buses.
Hayley was sound asleep in my arms her red hair was tangled and slightly matted but she still looked as gorgeous as ever. She snuffled quietly and then rested her head against my chest. Jeremy looked at us and smiled, I had heard somewhere that he and Hayley were always the tightest out of the band.
'I'm sure she's enjoying that.' He said, smirking.
'What?' I said, confused.
'It's really obvious she likes you.' He said laughing.
'Really?' I said, it came out slightly more hope full than I had intended.
'Yeah,' he said, frowning. 'You like her to?' he added picking up on the tone in my voice.
I looked down at her in my arms and blushed, Jeremy laughed then muttered something I didn't catch. Taylor jammed a key in the door and turned it, he motioned me to come in. the bus was completely silent. Unlike our bus where I'm sure Jack and Vinny will be partying until 4am. I followed Jeremy down the bus and he motioned to one of the bunks. I placed her carefully on the mattress, I smiled at her fast asleep and then said bye to the guys and headed back to my own bus. Everyone seemed to be asleep, I let out a sigh of relief and headed to my bunk and quickly joined them.
I woke up in my bunk, I frowned. I was sure I had fallen asleep in the van, I was still wearing Alex's hoodie as well and all my stuff from the beach. I grabbed my phone and checked the time 11am. Fuck, out show was in an hour. I rolled out of my bunk clumsily and walked straight into Jeremy.
'Oh sorry, J' I said
'No problem, I was just coming to wake you up.' He said
'How did I get back to my bunk?'
'Alex carried you back to the bunk when you fell asleep on his shoulder.' He said, laughing.
I laughed with him though I was blushing inside. I headed to the bathroom, I got changed quickly into my half black half white jeans and a black t shirt. I brushed my hair, pulling out the massive tugs. It was getting quite greasy, as everyone's did on tour, I needed a shower when we got to the new venue but it was fine for now. It just highlighted my bright yellow roots. I messed it up a bit to hide the fact I hadn't washed it in a while and headed out to our stage. We were kind of supposed to have a day off today most of the bands weren't playing this show but we didn't want to disappoint our kids. I skipped out on to the stage to greet our amazing fans.
'What's happening OHIIOOOOO!' I said into the mic.
I looked down between the gap between the fans and our stage, a bunch of the other bands had come to watch our show. I saw All Time Low and there was a few people from other band. The Black Veil Brides I think they were called, I had met their drummer CC a couple of days back, he was completely insane, but a whole load of fun. I recognised there two guitarist sitting next to him and either the bassist or the singer was there too I think.
'Right so I need you guys to do something for me.' I said to the crowd 'every show, without fail, I lose my voice. Every show and the fans manage to keep their voices. Well not today, I want you literally screaming the lyrics to our songs. I want you to be on voice rest for months after this. I want you sitting at Christmas with your family and not be able to talk!' I said into the mic wandering around the stage 'People will be like "what's wrong with them, why won't they talk to me?" and you will be like.' I stated to motion them writing 'It was the Paramore show at Warped last summer, I still can't talk and also guys tomorrow morning, when you wake up, I want you to try and sing something and if you can sing anything then you have done it wrong. Do you guys think you could do that for me?' The crowd yelled in response 'Okay so for our first song I'm going to need you to do something as well. I started to snap my fingers in the time of Fences.
'Can you do it with me?' I said and they started to snap my fingers. 'Feel that rhythm. That's it!' The guys burst into the intro to Fences.
'I'm sitting in a room!' I sand and then stuck out my mic 'Made up of only big white walls and in the hall.' The crowd sang to me.
We were around half way through our set and I got an idea, we were about to perform Brick by Boring Brick when I had an idea.
'Okay guys, I recognise a few of our friends sitting front and centre here. I said pointing at All Time Low, 'and if you guys cheer loud enough I'm sure that we could get a Mr Alex Gaskarth to come up and sing this song with me. Right so on the count of 3 I want you to scream your fucking heads off. One, two three!' I said and jammed the mic at them, there was a deafening cheer 'LOUDER, I can't hear you!' I pointed the mic back at them and they unbelievably cheered louder.
Alex chuckled and came up the stairs and onto our stage. The crowd screaming all the time, he walked over to me and I put an arm over his shoulder.
'Could I get a mic over here?' I called to my stage manager, who dashed onto the stage with one of my multi-coloured mics.
'There you go Alex, you get one of my beautiful colourful mics' I said handing it to him.
'Why thank you.' He said taking it
'Right so here is the all-important question, do you know the words to Brick by Boring Brick?' I said giving him a stare
'Yeah I do.' He said, I smiled happy he listened to our music.
'Okay guys, take it away!' I said skipping across the stage as the started to play the intro me head banging and shaking my flamed hair all over the place.
'She lives in a fairy tale somewhere too hard for us to find!' I sang and Alex joined me
We sang the whole song together and then when it was done I screamed 'Give it up for ALEEEXXXX!' the audience screamed and he jumped down back to join the guys.
I watched as Alex left our stage, I had to get him and Hayley together. I wonder if any of All Time Low knew they liked each other. It was really obvious to me and Tay that she liked him but then yesterday Alex had, indirectly, told me he liked her. We just had to get them together, Hayley needed someone in her life. I looked over at Tay and gave him a look. He nodded and we silently agreed we were getting them together. We performed the rest of our show well but I couldn't stop thinking of ways I could get them together and then we headed back to our bus.
'I'm going to hit the showers.' Said Hayley
'Alright see you later Hayles.' I said as she headed away from us.
'Operation Williams and Gaskarth get together is under way.' said Tay, I laughed and he did a forward roll on the grass and pointed his fingers in a gun shape. We headed to the All Time Low bus Zack, Jack and Rian were standing outside with some guy with brown hair a lip piercing and a mikey mouse hoodie.
'Where's Gaskarth?' I yelled to them
'Bathroom, why?' said Rian as we walked over to them.
'Okay it's totally obvious that him and Hayley have chemistry and we are determined to get them together.' said Tay casually as if it was no-big-deal.
'Yeah it is obvious.' said Zack with a laugh 'He doesn't know that though, I think that he thinks I'm the only one who's realised.'
'So how are we going to get them together?' added Jack and we all stood for a minute in silence, thinking.
'We really just need to get them alone.' I suggested. 'I think they would do the rest themselves.#
'How about both of our bands hang out tonight, we could make a bonfire and then we could all just leave for a while leaving the alone,' Rian said 'and together.'
'Good idea,' said Tay 'okay meet us at the small stage to the west of the venue at like 8?'
'Okay you bring Romeo, we'll bring Juliet.' I said smiling.
The guys had told me that we were doing some camp fire thing tonight with some of the other bands. They were up to something because Taylor could not stop smirking, I'd known they way to long and could read them both like a book. I grabbed Alex's hoodie and we headed over to the small west stage, it was getting dark but there was a massive fire.
'Are we even aloud to do this?' I said laughing at Jack who was desperately trying to make the fire smaller.
'Yeah we got permission.' Said Zack, chucking a pack of marshmallows to Alex who ripped them open. I shrugged and started picking up sticks and peeling the bark of the top. I sat down near the fire, and jammed a marshmallow on the end of a stick and then pointed it into the fire. Rian pushed Alex towards me he frowned and sat down near me. Jack then started shuffling up against him and he pushed away from him, frowning, and sat closer to me. What the hell was up with everyone? They were acting really strange. I handed Alex hid hoodie.
'Oh thanks.' He said putting it down on the grass next to him.
We sat talking about an hour until I saw I saw Jeremy look at Zack who nodded.
'We are all out of marshmallows.' Said Zack
'Yeah I think there's more in our bus.' added Tay
'Let's go get them!' said Jack standing up, everyone but me and Alex followed him.
'Why do they need so many people to get a fucking bag of marsh mallows?' Alex said laughing.
'They are so up to something.' I said laughing. 'You have fun on our stage today?' I added, changing the subject.
'Yeah,' Alex said laughing 'I thought I got out of performing today.' I laughed
'The fans love when we duets on that song, Josh usually does it but…' I trailed off.
'Hayles, if you don't mind me asking why did Josh and Zac leave?' he said curiously
'Well, it was awkward after me and Josh broke up, he started getting distant from the band and then I guess he convinced Zac as well. They left and we all thought we were on good terms. Then he came out with that blog, he completely slagged of the band, me, he even took a jab at Jeremy.' I said, I shook my head and looked at the ground. I didn't want to cry in front of Alex, I looked away and brushed away the fuckers who did come out my eyes.
'Oh right.' Alex said 'Sorry, it was really none of my business.'
'No, no. it's fine, it's great to have someone to talk to.' I said smiling and turning back to him.
'I'm always here for you, if you need me Hayley.' He said, I looked over to him. He had a soft smile on his face and I could see the fire dancing in him brown eyes. We sat looking at each other. I looked at his lips, I leaned towards them slightly, taking a risk. Alex looked at me them closed the gap between us. Pushing him lips against mine. His hands snaked up into my hair and I took the front of his t shirt in my hands, his lips tasted faintly of marshmallow, that wasn't a bad thing, trust me, it really wasn't.
'Finally!' I heard someone yell. I broke away from Alex and saw everyone standing a few metres away, my eyes dropped to the ground and I blushed. The guys walked over laughing.
'Took you long enough Gaskarth.' said Tay hitting Alex on the back. I laughed and looked at Alex, biting my bottom lip. He smiled and wrapped an arm around me. I sat back against his chest, he pulled a blanket around the both of us.
'That was to easy' Jeremy said and I stuck my tongue out at him
'oh well, Can we tell ghost stories?' he added.
'I wanna go first!' said Jack, laughing.
He began into him story, it was actually fucking terrifying. I listened intently tracing my fingers across Alex hand that was resting on top of my on my knee. Jack carried on with his story and I snuggled back into Alex's chest.
'You are fucking messed up Barakat,' I said when he was finished 'I'm going to have nightmares for weeks now.'
'Man up Williams.' Said Jack, laughing.
'I'm a girl in case you didn't notice.' I said sarcastically.
'Really?' he said 'I just though Alex was gay?'
I laughed and Alex threw the bag of marshmallows at Jack's face. 'Fuck you.' He said
We talked for hours after that, well into the morning. Tay fell asleep on the grass and Jeremy drew on him. 'It's only fair' he had said when I asked him what he was doing. He then fell asleep shortly after him. Then Rian, Jack and then I drifted of my head resting against Alex.
I woke up and there was sun shining down. I was lying under a blanket, Alex was lying behind me, his arm around my waist. Everyone else seemed to be asleep. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, I checked the time, 11.30.
'GUYYYSS!' I yelled and they all woke up
'Shut up Williams!' Jack groaned
'Guys we have to on stage in a half hour.' I said
They groaned and then, very slowly, got up heading back to our buses and changing quickly before heading back to our stages. When I got there I was handed my multi-coloured microphone, I took in a deep breath doing a couple of vocal warm ups before skipping out on to the stage. This was our last show in Ohio, I really don't know why we had been here for 3 days, I guess they were the shows that sold out the quickest.
'Hello there Ohio!' I said running my fingers through my hair. I really needed to dye it again, I think I might go ignorance orange again, Alex had said a couple of days ago he thought my hair was cool in the ignorance video. We played through our set, the day was kind of mild and there was a cold wind, which I was grateful for when I was running around on stage. We were around half way through Miz Biz, just before the instrumental. We had planned this yesterday, the guys suddenly stopped playing and I stopped singing. The crowd fell silent, looking confused.
I chuckled 'Haha, got you.' I said winking at them.
'Right so, in was thinking we could get one of you Parawhores on stage to help me sing this next part?' I said, the audience screamed. I scanned the crowd, my eyes caught sight of a girl right in the front row. 'How about you?' I said to the girl 'the girl in the black shirt.' I said to a security guard who was helping her out the crowd. She came up on stage grinning.
'So what's your name?' I asked
'Uh, I'm Rebecca.' She said
'Alright Rebecca, you're going to need a colourful mic to sing this part of Misery Business. Do you sing?' I said as our manager ran on with one, I handed it to her.
'I like to but I don't sing professionally.' She said quite shakily.
'That's fine, that's good enough for Rock and roll.' I said, laughing. she seemed like a sweet girl.
'Will you help me?' she said nervously.
'Of course!' I said smiling at her.
The guys burst into the song again 'I watched his wildest dreams come true, not one of them involving you.' I sang, Rebecca singing along. I stopped singing to give her the spot light.
'Just watch my wildest dreams come true, not one of them involving.' Rebecca sang, she was actually really good. The guitar solo came on and I started to dance head banging and waving to the crowd.
Later we sat working out the music to monster, we had figured out most of the song but it was getting really stressful.
'I need a break.' I said leaning back against my pillows, rubbing my fingers on my temples.
'Yeah, me too.' said Taylor pulling him guitar strap of from over his shoulder. I smiled, if it had been josh I would have got a half hour lecture on how I never took things seriously and I needed to concentrate. I wandered outside, letting my feet taking me wherever they felt like. I ended up at the ATL bus, the guys were sitting outside on the grass.
'Hey guys.' I said flopping down next to Alex.
'Hey Hayley,' said Alex and dropped an arm over my shoulders, I smiled to myself 'you feel like going for a walk?'
'Sure.' I said and he pulled me to my feet.
We walked away, Alex laced his fingers between mine and I smiled. There weren't many people around, most were band and crew members and a few ultra-fans who had won tickets that would let them stay for a while after everyone had left. We had only been walking for a few minutes before one of the ultra-fans noticed us and ran over, one of them in a Paramore is a band shirt. I smiled at them as they ran up to me and Alex. They asked us for pictures and I signed the girl's sleeve, eventually they then noticed the fact we were holding hands.
'Are you guys together?' said one of them, I looked up at Alex who smiled.
'Yup.' He replied no hesitation in his voice. I grinned at him, Josh had always wanted to keep 'us' a secret.
'Aw, you guys are cute together.' said one of the girls
'Thanks.' I said smiling at her.
We walked for ages just talking about shit.
I stood hugging people good bye as well all headed home. I hugged all the guys from All Time Low lingering on Alex.
'Promise you'll come visit me?' I said, not letting go of him.
'Scouts honour?' He said, smiling the smile I loved and sticking up 3 fingers.
'You were a scout?' I said, giggling at him.
'Dammit.' He muttered. 'Pinkie swear?' he stuck out his small finger to me, I took it laughing.
I kissed him then headed onto our bus and we drove away. We got to the airport and grabbed all of our luggage and walked to security. Our tour manager was just about to take of his belt, I nudged Tay standing next to me. he nodded a childlike smile on his face. He pulled of his belt and me and Taylor dropped to our knees.
'Please, I promise we'll behave!' I yelled.
'Yes, please don't hit us!' T added.
A few people around us laughed and the security guard rolled his eyes.
'I hate you guys.' said our tour manager as we got to our feet laughing.
The flight to Nashville was long and painful. I sat staring out the window at the blanket of pure white that covered the sky like a carpet. I blasted All Time Low through my headphones, the feeling of missing Alex already catching up with me. When we finally got off the plane I bid the guys goodbye and headed to my car. I smiled at its familiar sight, the back of it plastered with stickers. I drove home with I wandered in my front door and aited.
'HAYLEY!' screamed my roommate Danielle as she bounded down the stairs, jumping over the last three and running up and hugging me. I laughed, I always missed her, and she was my insane best friend. She was always really happy and usually said what she thought, which sometimes had its drawbacks.
'I've missed you!' I said when she let me go.
'I know you did.' She said 'who wouldn't miss me? Now what is this I hear about you having a new boyfriend?'
'how did you know already?' I said 'I wanted to be the first to tell you.'
'It's all over twitter.' She said laughing
'Already? Wow, oh well. You want all the details don't you.' I said and she nodded. We walked into our living room and smiled, the walls were still half painted, we had wanted them to be yellow so we had started to paint them before tour, I did expect that they wouldn't be finished though. We sat on the couch for hours just talking.
'What colour are his eyes?'
'what kind of brown?'
Brown but it had bits of red in it.'
'good kisser?' she said raising an eye brow. I laughed and looked away blushing.
'That's a yes.' She said giggling, I felt like I was in high school again. I smiled, it was great to just be talking to her again. I felt my phone vibrate inside my pocket, I pulled it out and saw I had one notification from twitter. I had it set on my phone that it would only beep if I got tweeted by my people I was following. I opened it and saw I had a tweet from Alex, I grinned.
Missing my flame headed girl yelyahwilliams already! She's only been gone 4 hours…. #ForeverAlone
I typed out a response.
Missing my honey AlexAllTimeLow like hell. #YoureNotAlone
I shoved it back in my pocket and Dani was smiling at me immaturely. I raised my eyebrows at her.
'I wanna see what he looks like!' she said suddenly and dashed over to her laptop that was sitting on the coffee table, I rolled my eyes and followed her. She was on YouTube and typed in all time low, clicking on the Weightless music video.
'fit.' She commented as soon as Alex appeared on the screen.
'too bad, he's mine.' I said and she smiled.
'Woah, who's that?' she said and paused it, just as Jack stood up.
'Jack.' I said 'the guitarist.' She gave an approving nod and I giggled at her.
'You like him?' I asked
'I don't know him but I wouldn't mind it if I did.' She said with a laugh, I smiled at her.
'okay, by the way, you wanna give me a hand dying my hair?' I asked
'Sure, don't you like it like that?' she asked
'It's alright, I want it like it was in ignorance though.' I said
'meh okay, I think there's a pack of that left.' She said and we wandered up to our bathroom. I kept a store of hair dye packs in a wardrobe in our bathroom, Dani had labelled them with things like 'Pressure' and 'Miz Biz' for every time period I had had my hair, the last one I had eyes was 'Emergency' she raked through the cupboard for a second before coming out with a packed labelled 'IGNORANCE IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND!' I laughed at it.
The next few months passed slowly, I missed Alex like hell but late night texting, Skype calls and phoning each other constantly helped. Eventually the time came when he was coming to visit me. I stood waiting at the airport for his flight to dock. I started tapping my fingers against my split coloured jeans. I ran a hand through my hair, I hope he liked it.
'Flight 182 from Baltimore Maryland is now docking.' Said the woman on the telecom, I smiled at the flight name, he would love that. The doors opened and people from his flight started filing out, I had to stand on my tiptoes to even catch I glimpse of him over all the people.
'Hayley!' I heard his familiar voice say. I couldn't see him through the crowd of people that were pushing passed me.
'Alex?' I said, and pushed up onto my toes to look for him. I saw him about a couple of metres to my left, he pushed through a bunch of people to reach me, when he did I didn't get a chance to blink before he took my face in his hands and pulled my face to his. Our lips met and I melted into him, wrapping my arms around him, forgetting the world around me. Eventually we had to pull apart before we both passed out from lack of air.
'Hey there.' He said brushing a hair of my face and smiling at me in the way I loved.
'Hello.' I said giggling. He took my hand and we started walking out the airport. We stood by the elevator, I looked over to my left and saw a group of teenagers whispering and looking at us, I noticed one of them was wearing a shirt that said JAGK of it. I tugged on Alex's hand and he looked at me, I inclined my head towards them. He smiled at them and the girls let off embarrassed giggles then walked over.
'Hey!' Alex said to them, smiling friendlily.
'Could we get a picture with you?' they asked him.
'Sure.' He said
'Do you mind?' they asked me holding out their phone, I had to hold back a laugh at the look on Alex's face. Obviously not Paramore fans.
'Not at all.' I said the girls stood around Alex and smiled. I noticed one of them didn't move towards them, it was only them I noticed her shirt, it was covered in RIOT! I smiled at her and took the picture.
'Thank you.' The girls said giggling and walked of, completely forgetting the small one.
'Do you want a picture?' I asked her and she blushed.
'No, but I wanted to give you this, could you maybe give it to Taylor?' She said quietly, pulled a piece of paper out her pocket and handed it to me before running after the other girls. I frowned and opened out the paper, it was a picture of Taylor she had drawn herself. I smiled at it.
'That's really sweet.' He said smiling at the paper.
'Yeah, I'm gonna see Taylor in a few days, I'll give it to him then.' I said, half to myself.
We got to my car and Alec let of a laugh.
'What?' I asked looking at him, he was smiling.
'I love it.' He said motioning to all the stickers plastered on the back of my car, he crouched down and examined all of them. He smiled and ran his fingers across the ATL sticker me and Dani had put there a few weeks ago.
'Oh, yeah, it's my collection. My little sister put one on a while back and I liked how it looked so I've added onto it.' I said and climbed in, Alex got in. I pushed the key into the ignition and it roared to life. We were about half way home, when the radio suddenly changed and a hurricane warning came on. I laughed.
'Awesome.' I commented.
'That's a good thing?' Alex asked laughing in disbelief.
'Yeah, it it's not very high on the scale then they can be fun we just have to get home soon.'
'okay, it doesn't look like there's going to be a storm it's so sunny out. So much more warmer here than Maryland.' He said closing his eyes against the warm air form the open window. His hair was being blown slightly of his face, the orange sundown light shining on his face. I started noticing things about him I hadn't seen before. The dimple in his left cheek, how long his eye lashes were. We got into the house just as the storm clouds rolled in, blocking out the sunlight.
the window rolled all the way down, the warm air blowing against my skin. I pulled into the drive way in front of my familiar house, I let out a long sigh, it was good to be home.
the wind just started to blow really hard as we got out the car, 'basement's round there!' i yelled over the noise of the wind. 'I'll be there in a minute, I juts have to get my roommate!' He nodded and ran round the side of the house. I ran in the front door.
'Dani! hurricane warning, get to the basement!' I yelled
'Coming!' she called back and stormed down the stairs. We went through the door in our hall way that lead down to the basement. Where Alex was standing. He smiled when he saw us coming. He wrapped an arm over my shoulder.
'Alex this is my roommate Danielle, Dani this is Alex.' I said, doing the whole introductions thing
'Nice to meet you.' Dani said and held out her hand 'Your as hot as Hayley described you.'
'Thanks, nice to meet you too' he replied chuckling. I shot Dani a look and she shrugged.
We sat in the basement for a while, all we had was a beat up loveseat which Dani had taken up all the room on. So Alex was sitting on the floor against the crumbling wall and I sat between his legs, resting against his chest, his chin resting on the top of my head. I was half way through a sentence when there was a bang from upstairs.
'What the hell was that?' Dani whispered. I shrugged.
'Go look.' I said to her
'No way. what if its an axe murderer?' She said 'you go.'
'So its okay if I get killed but not you?' I said, raising my eye brows trying to hold back my laughter.
'Meh.' She said 'Alex is the man, he should go do it!' We both gave her a look and she sighed.
'Fine!' She jumped up and ran up the stairs two at a time. I rolled my eyes, she was always this bouncy.
'If she starts to scream we know its a murderer.' Alex said and I giggled.
'Shit!' I heard her curse upstairs 'Hayley get up here!' She screamed, I could tell by the tone in her voice that something was seriously wrong. I bounced up and ran up the stairs Alex quick on my heels.
'What is it?' I said, wandering over to the window where we had her nose pressed up against the glass. I followed her eyes and gasped. There was a huge tree on top of our neighbors house. It had knocked in the roof and was sitting at an angle half inside the house.
'Wind must have blown it down!' I said in awe.
'I hope no one was there when it fell.' Dani said and I nodded in agreement.
'We should go visit them when the storms over, see if everyone's okay?' I suggested and Dani nodded. There was a loud clatter as the wind battered against our house.
'Well I'm going back into the basement.' Dani said and hurried down the stairs. I toook Alex's hand and followed her. We spent all night in the basement, I fell asleep while lying on the ground with Alex. When woke up we were in the same position we were in when I had woke up next to him at Warped. It made me smile to myself. I rolled over to face him and he was already awake and smiling at me.
'Well good morning.' I whispered to him.
'Good morning my flame headed girl' he said 'I like your hair by the way.'
'Thanks, you said you liked it in ignorance so.' I said.
'You don't have to change for me Hayley.' he said, I blushed. He brushed a bright orange strand of hair from my face. I nearly jmped out of my skin when my phone started to ring. Alex chuckled at me, I smiled and got up to answer it.
'Yello?' I said into the speaker.
'Hey sweeteie.' my moms familar voice said.
'Oh hey mom, what's up?'
'Nothing, what you up to?' she said
'Just hanging out with Alex.' I said then instantly regretted it.
'Oh your boyfriend? is he visiting? I'd love to meet him.' she said
'I don't kno-' i started but she cut me off.
'Come out to dinner with me and Lauren tonight.' she said, Lauren was my little sister.
'See you at 7?' She said
'Okay see you then honey, we'll drop by your house to pick you and, Alex? up.' i sighed
'Okay mom.' I said, giving up and slamming the phone down.
'What is it?' Alex asked, standing up off the floor and walking over.
'My mom, sorry but looks like your having dinner with us tonight.' Alex smiles.
'Great.' I raised my eyebrows at him 'I was going to have to meet them sooner or later anyway Hayles.'
'I guess.' I said suddenly happier, 'You want breakfast?' I asked and he linked our fingers together as we walked up stairs.
We spent the day over at our neighbours house, we broght over loads of tins of food to keep them going. They were a realy nice family who helped us out when my car broke down so we were happy to help them. Eventually though we had to start getting ready for tonight. I pulled my hair back, the hair artist at the only exception video had taught me how to do the bun she'd done for the video so I pulled it back like that. I grabbed my strapless black dress out aswell, it fell down to just above my knee. I searched in my ardrobe for a minute looking for shoes, until I found the pair I'd worn in the only exception. I felt a pang in my stomach as i remember Josh compimenting them when I'd worn them that day. I shook of the memory and pulled them on. I walked down stairs and Alex was standing in the hallway waiting for me. He was wearing black skinnies, converse and a simple plaid shirt but he still looked amazing as ever.
'Whoa.' Alex breathed when I walked over to him.
'You like it?' I asked
'You look beautiful Hayley.' he said and I felt my cheeks heating up. The doorbell rang and I walked dover to answer it. My mom and little sister where standng there.
'Hayley!' my 15 year old little sister squealed and hugged me. I laughed.
'Hey Lauren.' I said and returned her hug. 'Hey mom' My mom smiled and kissed my cheek.
'Hello Hayley.' she said and walked into my house. I walked over to Alex and mouthed good luck to him, he frowned for a second, I smiled and took his hand.
'This is Alex.' I said, smiling at my mom and sister
'It's lovely to finally meet you Alex' my mom said and shook his hand.
'You too Ms Willaims.' he said politely, she'd like that. Lauren just smiled at him, which he returned.
'Lets go then.' my mom said and we followed her out the door. We took her car the the resturant. when we got there we stood and waited in the line. I looked around the resturant, looked like a nice place. My eye stopped on someone. Crap.
'Oh no.' I muttered to Alex
'What is it?' he asked, putting an arm round me.
'Josh.' I mumbled, Alex looked up to where Josh was sitting with Jenna a few tables away, I felt his grip tighten on my shoulder.
'Don't pay him any attention Hayley, he doesn't control you.' he mumbled to me. I sighed, he was right.
'Yeah, right, sorry.' I said shaking my head.
Alex practically had to hold me up as we walked over to the table. His hand gripping onto my arm just above my elbow. My hand clutching the back of his shirt as tight as possible. I felt like I was going to pass out. We walked past Josh's table and I laughed. I saw him look over at us out the corner of my eye as I pretended to laugh at something Alex hadn't even said. I deliberately chose a seat where I didn't have to face him but I could still see him out the corner of my eye. My mom suddenly engaged Alex in polite conversation but I still gripped his hand under the table. I was really glad he was here, if he wasn't I would probably break down. Alex started to rub soothing circles into the back of my hand with his thumb and I relaxed a tiny bit.
'Have you guys been working on any new music?' Lauren asked me and I snapped out of it. I looked at her, she enclined her head towards Josh and I saw he was looking at us. She was doing it deliberately, proving that we didn't need him.
'Yes actually.' I said slightly louder so he could hear it.
'Really?' she said 'How it going?'
'Really good actually, for some reason its been really easy to write recently.'
'Hmm, that's great then.' my sister said and I shot her a thankful look, she winked back at me before turning to her menu.
The night passed pretty smoothly after that. I sat laughing and joking with my sister and Alex and talking to my mom about tour and whether I would be home for christmas, which I was going to be. I lookied at Josh a couple of times but he seemed to have directed his attention back to Jenna. I really missed Jenna, she was a sweet girl. No doubt she probably didn't like me anymore though. My mom was just asking for the check.
'I'm going to go to the bathroom.' I said standing up. Alex smiled at me and I wandered over to the bathroom, being careful not to look at Josh but keeping my head held high. I was just washing my hands after when someone walked into the bathroom.
'Hayley?' Said a female voice and I turned round. It was Jenna.
'Jenna' I said, not really knowing how she was going to react. She smiled and embraced mme in a hug. I wasn't expecting that. I hugged her back but it nearly made my cry, she smelled of him.
'It's great to see you again, how are you?' she said in a perfectly friendly way.
'I've been great, you?' I replied carefully.
'I've been fine, are you here with Jeremy and Taylor?' she asked
'No, my mom and my sister.' I paused 'and my boyfriend, speaking of which I should probably get back to them,' she nodded
'Well it was great seeing you again.' she said
'You too.' I replied, leaving. My family and Alex were waiting outside for me. I smiled at them though I felt like a huge hole had been punched in my chest. Speaking to Jenna had made so many memories come flooding back to me. Alex seemed to sense something was wrong because he didn't let go off my hand all the way home.
'thanks for dinner mom.' I said getting out the car.
'It was nothing Hayley, and it as great to finally meet you Alex.' she replied
'You too, Ms Williams.' he said smiling and my mom drove away. I sighed and walked up to my house. I got inside and saw a note sitting on the table next to the door.
Went to Ben's, see you tomorrow Hayles xx -Dani :D
I sighed, Ben was her boyfriend. I sat down in my living room, my head in my hands. There was a raging pain in my chest that I just couldn't seem to get rid of.
'Hayley?' Alex said sitting next to me. I sighed.
'I met Jenna in the bathrooms, Josh's wife.' I said, nearly in tears 'It just reminded me off the times where our band was whole, when we were all happy and together.' I stumbled out. I felt Alex arm snake around me and I leaned against his chest, listening to his heart beat. We sat in peace for a minute before I realised what was going to make it better. I couldn't just sit feeling sorry for myself. I needed my guys and we needed a song that would just shove in Josh's face how fine we were without him or Zac but for now I just needed to talk to Jerm and Tay.
'I need my guys.' I said and fished my phone out my bag. I found Jeremy's number and pressed dial. It was Kat who picked up.
'Jeremy's phone, can I help you?'
'Hey Kat, it's Hayley, is Jeremy around?' I asked
'Oh, hey Hayles, he's in the bathroom but I think he's out now.' she said, there was some suffling then Jeremy came on.
'Hi Hayley.' he said 'something wrong?' he always got straight to the point.
'yeah but right now what I need is you, Tay, pop corn and the scariest movie you can find.' i said and Alex let off a laugh.
'Okay, see you in 10.' he said, not even questioning me. He knew something was wrong. Usually when one of us felt down or sad we'd all just let it out and scare ourselves shitless for of good few hours. I sat with Alex for a while, I lay under his arm while he absent-mindedly played with my hair until the door bell rang, I sprang up and ran to the door, Alex following. I flung open the door and Taylor and Jeremy where standing. Jerm's arms filled with bags of junk food and Tay carrying at least 10 dvd cases.
'I believe our presense was needed?' Taylor said smiling and walking in. I laughed.
'It would be much appreciated.'
I sat on the floor with Taylor chosing which DVD to watch while Jeremy almost made my microwave explode. He came in with a slightly burned bowl of pop corn.
'So what we watching?' He asked and sat down on the couch next to Alex.
'Fianl Destination.' I said and threw myself down between them.
'Which one?' Alex asked, putting an arm around me, I snuggled down into his chest.
'numero dos.' Taylor said and I rolled my eyes. He squeezed onto the couch and played the movie. Jeremy turned off the lights and I knew there was no way i was sleeping tonight.
When the film was fished I was properly shaken up and even made Alex go up stairs before me. The guys decided they were just gonna crash here tonight because it was already 2 am. I settled into bed, even with Alex's arm around me I didn't feel safe. After a good hour of laying with my eyes open I gave up. I carefully sliped out from under Alex's arm, who was sound asleep and padded down stairs. Jeremy had shotguned the spare room which left Taylor with the couch. I noticed the living room light was on, I walked in and Taylor was quietly watching T.V. He looked up when I walked in.
'Can't sleep?' he said, I shook my head sitting down next to him. 'Me niether.'
'Too scary?' I asked and he laughed, 'I'm such a whimp, yes.'
'You're not a whimp Taylor.' I said. He smiled.
'So what happened?' he said 'There must have been a reason for us coming over?' I sighed and looked at him, he raised an eye brow.
'I saw Josh today.' I said and his brown eyes went steely.
'You can't let him control your life Hayles.' He said and I nodded, remembering Alex saying the exact same thing.
'I was fine up until I met Jenna in the bathrooms.' I said and Taylor gave me a quizical look.
'She was acting as though nothing had happened. It just reminded me of old times.' I said and Tay's expression softened. 'Lets just made Moster a kick ass song okay?' I said and he laughed
'Definatley.' he replied, I smiled.
'Your the best Tay.' I said and he grinned.
Time seemed to pass to quickly and the next thing I knew I was standing at the airport, gripping onto the front of Alex's shirt and begging him to to go.
'I would stay Hayles but I gotta go on tour.' He said and I pouted at him, he groaned. 'ugh, I don't wanna leave.'
'Then stay.' I said, wrappping my arms around his waist.
'call for flight 41 to Maryland.' said the telecom lady and Alex gave me a sad look. I slowly realeased him.
'I'll be back before you know it.' he said and kissed me, he pulled away suddenly and I frowned at him. 'Come with me.'
'come with me.' he repeated.
'I-I-' I stuttered, trying to find something wrong with the idea but honestly I couldn't find anything. The next few months were wide open for me, I had to write a few more songs because we'd promised our fans some new materialbut I always tened to write better while touring.
'Please?' Alex said
'But I don't even have a ticket and I'm not packed or anything!' I said
'There's another flight leaving at 5 tonight, you can get that one!' he said and grabbed my hand. He pulled me over to the desk where you bought tickets.
'One for the flight at 5pm to Baltimore Maryland.' he said before I could say no to the crazy idea. The woman behind the desk smiled.
'That'll be $60' she said and Alex grabbed his wallet.
'Wait Alex,' I said but he shushed me and handed over the money. The receptionist typed a couple of things then handed me the ticket.
'Enjoy your flight.' she said cheerfully.
'Last call for flight 41.' said the telecom.
'I gotta go.' Alex said 'Promise me you'll get that plane?'
'I will.' I said. I couldn't exactly say no now, he grinned and kissed my forehead before running off the catch his flight. I looked down at the ticket in my hands. He was so spontaneous and amazing. I grinned to myself and ran to my car and drove home.
'That's so romantic!' Dani squealed when I told her where I was going. She was helping me throw stuff in a case. I looked at the clock.
'Ugh I'm so gonna miss my flight!' I said, Dani shoved the case closed and threw it at me.
'Go!' she said and practically pushed me back out the door.
I ran to my car and started it up again, I pulled out the drive way and drove as fast as possible, with out getting arrested, to the airport. I just got there in time, they closed the doors for docking behind me and I let of a long sigh. I boarded the plane and leaned back in my chair as it took off. Josh would have never done anything like this, it was so unbelieveabley reckless. Which was one of the many things I loved about Alex.
I rang his doorbell, reading the directions of the back of my hand. Dani had searched his address then scawlled it, upside down, on my hand. A girl answered the door, he had longish brown hair with a couple of blonde streaks in it.
'Hi, uh, is Alex here?' I said
'Yeah, you must be Hayley.' she said smiling before yelling Alex's name. He came to the door grinning at me.
'You made it!' He said and grabbed me in a huge hug, my feet going a clear foot off the gorund. I giggled as he put me down.
'Come on!' he said and grabbed my hand, following the girl back inside his house.
'Hayley this is Cassadee, Cass Hayley.' he said
'Nice to meet you.' she smiled at me.
'You too.' I said
'She sings for Hey Monday.' Alex said then lowered his voice 'Rian's girlfriend.' I nodded, they led me into his living room where All Time Low were sitting with 5 other people.
'You made it Hayley!' Jack said
'Yeah.' i said
'Alex says that your coming on tour with us?' Zack asked smiling.
'I guess so.'
'Hayley this is We Are The In Crowd.' Alex said motioning to the 5 others with them. 'They are opening for us, This is Cameron, Mike, Rob, Tay and Jordan.' I smiled at them, which they returned.
'Its great to meet you!' said the girl of the band, Tay.
'Its great to meet you all too.' I said
The next few days we're amazing, just getting to know everyone and hanging out. Though I did get an earfull when i told my mom what I'd done. Taylor and Jeremy were completely fine with it though, they said I'd needed a break anyway. Though jeremy had tolf me not to slack off, we still needed material when I got back. Though I'd forgotten half of my stuff in the huge hurry to get anything packed. So on the very first day before tour I sat on the floor looking through what I had brought with me.
'This is never going to last an entire tour.' I said, puhing various items of clothing around in my bag.
'Well I forgot a couple of things too' Tay said 'I was gonnago out with Cassadee and get them if you wanna come with.' I smiled at her.
'Great.' So I spent all day with them, Tay had only fogotten things like hair spray and toothpaste. I'd forgotten things like underwear and you know, just not enough clothes in general.
'This would look so nice on you!' Cass said holding up a pair of shorts, they were gorgous. They were light blue and had suspenders.
'I love them!' I said and she handed them to me.
'What about with this?' Tay said holding up a cream colored top with blue lining. I held them together and threy looked amazing.
'You should totally get them!' Tay said, grinning. Which I did. we stopped off for coffee before heading home.
'How did you and Alex meet?' Cass asked, wrapping her fingers around her coffee mug and I smiled, remembering. It was my second Warped tourever and they were coming on after us. It was their first ever and people had shown up to see us and started leaving when our set was over. I'd told them all it was disresectful to just leave and they needed to stay because a totally worthwhile band was coming on after us. I didn't even know them but people had left for us on my very first tour and I knew how bad it felt.
'Ages ago,' I said 'I think it was my second ever Warped tour.'
'But you only got together this summer?' Tay added, I nodded. 'Sorry, I'm being nosy.' I shook my head.
'You make him really happy.' Cass said out of the blue. I looked at her, she smiled.
'You do, it's so obvious as well.' she said 'I've known hom for a few years now and I've never seen him happier than when he's with you. For w few months after warped i noticed he was kind adown but one time when I was over he was skyping with you and he had the biggest smile I've seen on his face fo a long time.' I couldn't help but blush at that.
'It shows as well.' Tay said 'The fact he asked you to come on tour with him also shows he can't bear to be apart from you.' I could feel my cheeks burning up.
When we got back everyone was loading theee bags onto the bus. Alex came outside carrying masses of guitar cases. I ran over and grabbed one when he nearly dropped them everywhere.
'Thanks Hayley.' he said and handed a guy them all, he held his hands out for the one I had and I gave it to him.
'This is Danny.' Alex said putting an arm around me, now he said it I recognised him for STD.
'Yeah Danny Kurily right?' I said and they both looked at me weirdly. 'What? I have watched Straight To DVD before.' they both laughed and Alex led me onto the bus.
'Sadly there is no bunks left so your bunking with me.' he said, Zack walked past at the time.
'Nice try Alex.' he said 'You're there Hayley.' he said and pointed to the bunk across from Alex's. I inspected it, it wasn't much different to my one on the Paramore bus.
So do I have any jobs for this tour?' I said. I was sat on Alex's knee in the front longue of the bus, Alex shrugged. I was starting to feel guilty for coming with him, half the reason I had was to escape from Josh for a while. Alex made me so happy and whenever I even saw Josh I felt my heart break. It's really just science.
'You could sing Remembering Sunday?' suggested Rian, I grinned and looked at Alex.
'That's a great idea.' he said, smiling, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me against his chest. Jack walked past with a pop tart hanging out his mouth. 'I have one rule for this tour, Jack.' Alex said to him and he stopped, taking the food out his mouth.
'And what would that be?' he asked, raising his eye brows.
'You're not allowed to be naked at anytime.' Alex said and I burst out laughing at Jack's expression. It was a mixture between sad and confused. 'I don't need my girlfriend to see that.'
'Don't act like she wouldn't enjoy it.' Jack murmered walking off and I couldn't stop laughing.
'Dick.' Alex muttered under his breath.
The first stop of the tour was in Virginia, I had been ordered to help Evan and Jeff with sound and lights. Apparently if the fans saw me walking around on stage before the gig, setting up the amps and everything ,they would freak out. So I was sat frounf of house, It was about half way through the gig when Matt showed up and asked me to come get set up for Remembering Sunday. I followed him back towards the stage, doing the kinda silly vocal warm ups that my instructor gave me. They may look weird but they worked. Matt started to snicker in front of me.
'They're good warm ups!' I said, trying to defend myself.
'Better than Alex's.' Matt said 'They're alot more funny to watch.' I gave him a shove as Coloussy handed me, what I could only assume, was probably Jack or Zack's mic.
'Okay so when he starts to sing, following me on my desperate endevour, you go out okay?' Colloussy said to me and I gave him the thumbs up and he rushed away again. I sat listening to Alex's note perfect voice singing, waiting for me que. He started to sing the line I had just been told. Matt signalled me and I walked out onto the stage. The fans started to go completeley insane.
'I'm not coming back, I've done something so terrible. I'm terrified to speak but you'd expect that from me, I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt now the rain is just washing you outta my hair and outta my mind. I'm keeping an eye on the world from so may thousands of feet of the ground. I'm over you now, I'm at home in the clouds towering over your head.' I sang, I walking over to the front, middle stage where Alex was standing with his acoustic. He grinned at me as I finished Juliets small part in the song and then he sang his I guess I'll go home nows.
'Hayley Williams of Paramore everybody!' Alex said givning me a one armed hug, he kissed my head and the fans went crazy. I lauged and walked off the stage, waving to them.
'That was great Hayley!' said Matt as I handed him back the mic, which I now realised was Jack's because it had Burrito Boy written on it in tippex.
'Thanks Matt.' I said and wandered off backstage. I found Mike off We Are The In Crowd.
'Hey!' I said wandering over to him.
'Hey Hayley,' he said with a friendly smile 'I was just heading back to the bus with the guys if you wanna come.'
I noticed Jordan, Rob and Cameron standing a bit behind him.
'Yeah sure, where's Tay though?' I asked
'She went back a few minutes ago.'
'Oh okay.' I replied and followed them back to the bus.
I sat tapping my pen againnst my note pad, waiting and hoping that lyrics would come to me. Nothing did. I was sitting for a good 10 minutes in silence, alone in the longue before I gave up and walked into the back longue to join the guys who were playing video games. I sat down next to Tay and pulled my phone from my pocket. I had 3 new messages. One from Dani and two from Taylor. I opened Dani's first.
Hey there guurl! how's tour going? Wish you were here, I have so much to tell you. I broke up with Ben, long story. we can talk when you get back, just enjoy yourself okay? xx
I frowned at her message, her and Ben had been together for years. It was weird trying to imagine them not together. I opened Tay's messages.
Yello Hayles, just gonna say that we finished recording Jeremy's bass for Moster, moving on to the guitar and stuffs later ;)
I scrolled down to his second message.
and remember no slacking off, I expect a full album done for when you get back! ;) I kid but don't forget the material Hayes and we'll see you when yah get back :D
I let out a long sigh and leaned back in the chairs, closing my eyes.
'You alright Hayley?' Cameron asked me, I opened an eye to look at him.
'Fine.' I said opening them both 'This album is just stressfull.' he gave me a sympathetic look which didn't really help me.
'I'm sure you'll get there.' Tay added, I sighed.
'I just feel like I'm running away from it.' I said. and him, I thought to myself. Rob started to tap a rythm on his thigh absent mindedly. I listened to it, it was quite good.
'Keep doing that.' I said to him, he looked confused but didn't question me. I started to hum along with it.
'Tay, hum that for me.' I said and she did.
'and when I get there it won't be far enough.' I started to sing quietly 'I'm a...what's another word for someone who runs from something?'
'a renegade?' suggested Jordan
'I'm a renegade, it's in my blood.' I continued to sing. Then grinned 'If ever I get there, it won't be fast enough. I'm a renegade, I always was.'
'I got it!' I exclaimed and dashed out the back lounge and scribbled down the baisics of what seemed were going to be a totally killer chorus. The guys walked in from the longue.
'They shows about to end, we we're gonna go meet some fans?' Cameron asked 'wanna join?'
'I can't.' I said, writing down lyrics as they flooded into my head. 'If I stop now I'll forget and never get this song started.' and they left.
I sat for hours at the table in the front longue. It was totally liberating writing down exactly what I felt about myself and Josh and this entire new record actually. Slowly the longue emptyed as people dragged themselves to bed.
'Hayles, you coming?' Alex asked me.
'No, I have to finish this.' I said not looking up. I heard him sigh and he left. I felt a pang of guilt but this song was to important. I couldn't stop now.
The next thing I knew my head was flat down on the table and Vinny was shaking me awake. I sat up and groaned.
'Sorry to wake you.' he said 'but we've stopped at a staiton if you want some air.' he said, I smiled at him.
'Thanks.' I said and grabbed my notebook, following him out the door. I found Alex out front, drinking out of a can of Coke. The weather here was blistering hot, more so than Nashville, where ever we actually are. I sat down next to him.
'Alex, I'm sorry that I didn't spend anytime with you last night.' I said, I had been feeling really guilty for just shutting him out like that. He chuckled.
'It's nothing Hayley, I know how important this album is for you.' he said.
'That's still no reason to shut you out' I came back 'How can I make it up to you?' He looked at me.
'Let me hear the song.'
'I wanna hear what you've been working on'
'It's not finished.' I said, feeling my cheeks flushing, his smiled softened.
'Please?' he said and I melted in his eyes.
'Fine.' I said opening it at the new song, I knew all the lyrics that I'd got so far but it was something to look at while I was singing.
'The grass wasn't green enough here, after washing it with my tears. Not sure where you went, now we are just past tense. The snakes they're slithering in, casing me to my end.' I paused at a part where I hadn't figured out the lyrics 'I'm running again.' I burst into the chorus, earing us a few watchers from people of out bus. I didn't take my eyes off the page the whole time and when I was done I looked at Alex sideways through a curtain of carrot coloured hair.
'It's brilliant Hayley!' he said grinning 'Has it got a name.'
'Renegade.' I said
Most of my time on the tour was filled with helping the crew, writtig as much as possible and spending as much time possible with Alex and by the time the tour was over I'd finished another two songs. One was more of a ballad and I wanted it to be acoustic the othere was really lively and I had the beginnings of an amazing bass line fingured out for it. Jeremy could make it lot better but other than that I was pretty proud of how much I'd done and I think the guys will be two. On the very last night of tour, I lay in my bunk dreading the morning when I had to say goodbye to Alex again. It was going to hurt, even though we'd just spent three months in each other's company. I bundled the blankets around me forcing myself to sleep.
I sat on a hospital bed, there were presents and flowers sitting around me but the gifts lay unopened and the flowers were dead and withered. I sat alone, a feeling of greif sitting in the pit of my stomach as I took in my strange surroundings. There was one grimy window and a TV sat on in the corner but the screen was grey and fuzzing, though it made no noise at all. Everything was utterly silent. I jumped of the bed and noticed I was wearing the clothes that Tay and Cass had picked out for me not a couple of months before. I stood for a second, listening. I could hear a faint sound coming from outside my room, I followed it out into the deserted hall way. Nothing. I looked behind me and that was when it happened, the emergency light on the wall completely exploded. I ran, avoiding the sparks that were theatening to burn me. Suddenly everything started to blow up as I ran as fast as I could down a, now dark, hall way. I ran into what could only be taken as the recpetion whre I nearly ran into Jeremy and Taylor. We gave each other looks of equal confusion. I was about to speak when the light above us exploded. We all ran out the same way. Me in the lead. I looked behind me at the looks of pure terror on my best friends faces as we were englufed by smoke and expolsions.
I awoke with a start and smashed my head against the bunk above mine. I heard Rian groan.
'Sorry.' I whispered up to him. Lying back down and rubbing my dream had properly shaken me up, what did it even mean? I sat completely terrified out of my mind in my bunk for a minute before I climbed out.
'Alex?' I whispered into his bunk. I waited and a couple of seconds and he pulled back the curtain. His eyes were tired and half closed, his hair sticking up all over the place.
'Hayley?' he mumbled 'what is it?'
'This will sound stupid but I had a nightmare.' I whispered to him, he smiled and shuffled back in his bunk to make room for me. I clambered in and he arranged the blankets over both of us before pulling me close into his chest. I felt safe and fell asleep instantly.
When I woke up I could feel Alex's hot breath on my neck and it sent shivers down my spine. I turned over to face him. He was lying with his mouth slightly open, breathing lightly. A strand of his hair falling in front of his lips and it moved back and forth as he breathed. I sat watching it, mesmorised. He stirred in his sleep and opened one eye, he saw me and smiled.
'Good morning beautiful.' he said,
'Morning.' I said and I steached his hand up, resting it on the side of his face, Rubbing my thumb across him cheek until he slowly fell back asleep again. I sat soaking up every single second spent with him until I heard Matt call.
'That's us in Nashville Hayley.'
They were dropping me off in Nashville before driving back to Batimore. I kissed the tip of Alex's nose. He stirred but didn't wake.
'Good bye.' I whispered and rolled out his bunk. I grabbed my case and jumped off the bus.
'I'll see you guys soon.' I said and watched as the bus disappeared down the road. I let out a long sigh and started to walk home, when I was about half way there I realised that Jeremey's was closer and I was pretty excited for showing them the new stuff. They'd asked for some material to work with, they weren't expecting 3, practically finished, song lyrics. I rang his dorrbell and he answered is.
'Hayley!' he said and embraced me in a hug.
'Hey Jerm.' I said 'You busy?'
'No Kat's out at the moment, you want me to call Taylor?'
'Yep, i've got loads to show you!' I said
After I'd sung them the 3 songs, which I had decided to call Renegade, Hello Cold World and In The Mouring, and they told me how great they were we got straight down to writing the music. I tried my best but I was distracted, the dream kept playing in the back off my mind. I was starting to think about how it would be a great music video for Monster. We worked on music for a good couple of hours and then I was pushed into the recording studio to get the vocals layed down for Monster. By the end of the day I was losing my voice, exhausted and missing Dani so much.
'Can we finish there for now?' I asked and both Taylor and Jeremy nodded, looking just as tired as me. I grabbed my bag from tour and slung it over my shoulder. Taylor gave me a lift home and I waved as he drove away. I wandered up to my house and rang the doorbell. Praying Dani was actually in cause I'd forgotten my keys in the rush to pack my bag. She opened it two seconds later and grinned at me.
'Hey there shexy!' she said opening the door wider for me.
'Why hello there.' I said and dumped by bag in the hall. I looked at Dani, something was extremely different about her. She was extremely pale and there were huge dark circles under her piecing blue eyes and she looked thinner than usual. Her long, dark brown wavy hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail and was slgihtly matted. She always had it down. Always.
'Dan, what happened?' I said and she let out a long sigh. She motioned me to follow her as she slumped down onto our living room sofa. I sat next to her, watching how she acted carefully. She was completely out of it. Not bouncy, not eccentric, not happy.
'Dani?' I said and she looked at me and smiled weakly.
'We really should finish the paint in here.' she said, avoiding the question. I smiled at her, she didn't want to talk about it at the moment. I'll get it out of her later but for now, I'll just take her mind off it.
'Yeah we do.' I said standing up. I went and got the buckets of yellow paint out of the hallway wardrobe 'Come on then' I threw her a roller and she stood up. Her smile was weak but genuine. We spent all day laughing and talking, I was desperate to cheer her up that I completeley forgot to call Alex when I was supposed to. We stood back to admire our work.
'Beautiful.' I said, taking in the now warm yellow of our living room.
'Yeah' Dani said 'I'm gonna head to bed Hayles.' she said and wandered off. I looked at the clock, it had gotten late but it was still early for her to be going to bed. I sighed and trudged after her. Something was wrong, and it was so bad that she wouldn't talk to me about it. We'd known each other sinse hishschool. We told each other everything and always had. It must be something to do with Ben. I got into my room and checked my phone. 3 missed calls. Crap, I'd forgotten about Alex. I texted him quickly, telling him to go on skype and a couple of minutes later his perfect face was on my screen. I smiled at him.
'Sorry, I forgot to call.' I said sheepishly, he chuckled.
'It's fine Hayley.'
'It's just Dani, she's really worrying me.'
'She's completeley shut me out, something's wrong with her and she won't tell me what happened.'
'Give it time Hayles, I'm sure she'll open up eventually.' he said, I sighed.
'So hows you?' I asked
'Kinda sad, my girlfriend left without saying goodbye this morning' he said, I gave him a sheepish smile.
'You were asleep.' I said and he rolled his eyes.
'You still should have woken me up, there was something I wanted to tell you before you left.'
'and what would that have been?' i asked smiling.
'I love you.'
I felt a huge smile crack across my face.
'I love you too 'Lex.' I said and he let out a relieved sigh.
'Good.' he said grinning at me 'I miss you.'
'I've been gone for 10 hours?' I said giggling.
'So? that's way too long.'
'The whole distance thing kinda sucks.' I commented and he nodded.
'Oi! Gaykarth.' said a voice in the back ground and he cringed.
'Dammit, I was hoping you'd never find out about that nickname.' he said then Jack shoved him our of the screen and sat down in his place.
'Yo Williams!' he said 'what's shakin'?' I laughed.
'Why are you talking like that Jack?' I asked.
'I dunno really?' he said and we both burst out laughing.
I was about to speak when I heard a clap of thunder. I felt fear shake through my body. I pushed the laptop of my lap and it hit the floor. I dashed as fast as I could into Dani's room. She was sitting shaking in the corner her head in her hands. Another loud bang of thunder cause her to scream and she started crying, shaking violently all over. I ran over to her and helped her up, pracyicaly having to drag her back into my room, I snached her iPod off her table as we left. More thnder, she started to sceam again. Clutching her hands over her ears, desperately trying to block out the sound. I handed her the iPod, jamming the buds into her ears and plasting Riot! through them before pushing her insde my, now completely sound proof closet and locking it behind her. I let out a sigh and slid down the door to the floor. She would be fine now, she couldn't hear anyhting in there.
'Hayley?' said Jack, who was sitting with Alex now on my screen. I smiled weakly at them and walked over, picking my laptop of the ground.
'what happened to Dani?' Alex said, a concerned look on his face.
'She's ' I said and saw the look of confusion on their faces 'She has a fear of thunder storms.'
'So locking her in your closet helps?' Alex asked
'Yeah, small spaces where she can't really hear anything. That's what the iPod is for, completely blocking out sounds.' i answered, dropping my head into my hands. There was another clap of thunder but it seemed further away.
'Will she be alright?' Jack asked, I smiled at him. Remembering when I showed her the Weightless video.
'She'll be fine.' I answered 'The thunders just about gone. She can probably come out in a minute.' More thunder.
I talked to them for about 15 minutes until I was sure there was no more thunder. I said good bye to them and Jack said to tell Dani he hoped she was okay and I shut off my laptop. I wandered over to the wardrobe and opened it. Dani looked at me. The headphones still in, I could hear Let Ther Flames begin blasting out the headphones. She pulled out the buds.
'Is it all done?' she said weakly.
'All done.' I nodded, helping her up and out the closet. 'Dani, what happened while I was gone?' she sighed.
'I guess I's have to tell you sooner or later.' she said and sat on my bed, i sat next to her.
'Well Ben was over while you were away and a storm hit. I never told him I was and he thought I'd gone insane. Trying to help me up and completely freaking out himself. I don't blame him. I was lying on the floor screaming andf rything.' she started 'In the end I clawed him in the face and it was pretty bad, he started bleeding. After the storm was over I tryed explaining, I tried to tell him it was just and I didn't mean to scratch him. He believed me and took my apology but broke up with me because I'd lied to him. Never told him I had .'
'Oh Dani, I'm sorry.' I said and she dropped her head on my shoulder.
'Not your fault Hayles.' she said and I rubbed her back, trying to sooth her.
'All you need is a great new guy to shove it in his face.' I said, she giggled. 'Actually, while we we're on tour they announced the nominees for the Kerrang! awards and I was gonna go. The guys will be there. Why don't you buy the best dress ever and show up looking hot in a place filled with good looking band dudes?'
'You, Hayley Williams, is what one might call a genius.' she said sitting up.
'I know, now get some sleep, we'll go dress shopping in the morning kay?' I said, she smiled and got up to leave. 'Oh wait!' she turned around 'Jack wanted to say he hoped you were okay.' she smiled, blushing ever so slightly and left.
The next day she was as bright as ever, bouncing all over the place as we left for the shops. I kinda wanted a really cool dress that was a bit different. I was good for finding things like that. I mean soon after Riot! came out we went to an awards show. I was dressed in a normal dress, but I had a bow tie on and tights that I''d ripped to shreds. Actually I saw Alex at that, he was helping out Buzznet and interviewing people there. I smiled while remembering the vampirecorns. We searched for a good few hours, looking for dresses Dani found a couple she liked but nothing really popped out at her. She was looking for something that would make her look drop dead gorgeous. We headed into a charity store, this was usually where I found what I would wear. I walked in and saw it. The dress I'd been looking for. I grabbed it off the rail, it was in my size. It was just like destiny. It was a deep blue colour but it had tetris shapes falling down on it where they piled up at the bottom, makign a lining for the hem of the skirt. It had smalll starps and there was black netting poking out from the bottom. I held it up to Dani, she smiled.
'It's very, you.' she said and I continued to look through a rail of dresses then gasped.
'Found one?' I said and she nodded, pulling it of the rack. The actual dress was red strapless and fell about 2 inches above her knee but the whole dress had a layer of black lace over it.
'It's gorgeous.' I said and she grinned.
'This is my dress.' she said and we both bought our dresses and headed home.
'So are you gonna pick up a band member in that dress?' I asked.
'Actually I got a date already.' she said and my eyes widened.
'Yeah, his band is up for an award.' she said
'Who is it?' I said excitedly and she tapped the side of he nose. I moaned at her all the way home, trying to get it out of her who it was. She stayed silent and eventually I gave up.
I managed to convince Alex to come, it was a two hour drive for both of us to get there but it was worth it if I got to see him, even if it was only for a few hours. Me and Dani were just finished getting ready, she looked absolutely amazing. Her dark hair was pulled up into a bun thing but there were ringlets falling out of it. I'd done my only exception hair again and put on bright red lipstick and a pair of matching red Doc Martains. I completeley clashed but I pulled it off. The drive there was long and pretty boring, I tried and failed again to get out of Dani who the mystery man was but she wasn't giving up that easily. When we got there I managed to find Alex in a maze of people and Dani said she's meet us in there, she had to meet the guy. We did the whole, getting loads of pictures taken on Kerrang's version of the red carpet thing. Then walked inside.
'You look amazing.' he said in my ear and I fely my cheeks heating up.
'Are you alone?' I asked, he shook his head and we sat down at a table.
'Dragged Jack along with me.' he said, I nodded and looking in a maze of people for Dani. I caught sight of her walking towards us on the arm of some guy. Someone walked past just as I was about to see who it was. I stood up and my jaw dropped at who she was with.
'Alex.' I said and tapped his shoulder he stood up too and followed my line of vision and let off a quiet chuckle. Dani was walking towards us, looking fabulous, while clutching on to none other than Jack's arm. They reached us and she smiled at me, i let of a disbelieveing laugh and they sat down next to us.
'Why didn't you tell me it was jack?' I whispered to her.
'Surprise?' she said, I gave her a look. 'I really like him okay?'
'Oh, alright.' I said, I could tell by the look in her eyes when she looked at him that she did like him. a lot.
'So what catagory you in for?' Alex asked me.
'Hottest female.' I said with a laugh.
'Oh okay.' Alex said then burst out laughing. 'You're definately gonna win then.' I blushed and he took my hand.
'What are you guys in for?' I said
'Best Live Band.'Jack answered.
'Ah you'll get it for sure.' I said.
'Yeah, you had Hayley on your set this tour, she will have bumped you guys up a bit.' said Dani. I rolled my eyes and the guys laughed.
'I don't think we'll get it.' Jack said
'Why?' I asked
'We're up against My Chem.' said Alex and I nodded, they were pretty hard to beat
They started reading off the people who'd won, I sat and waited for hottest female. The hottest male was awarded to Oli Sykes and I sat up a bit for my catagory. No doubt they were streaming this live to Kerrang TV and Radio. I still can't believe I was in this catagory, I mean i was up against people like Taylor Mobsen and Amy Lee.
'And the hottest female is...' said the guy, who's name escapes my memory. 'Hayley Williams of Paramore.' he said and I stood up.
'Go get 'em.' I heard Alex whisper to me as I walked to the stage. I accepted the massive K reward and smiled to the crowd before going back to my seat, completeley dazed. I sat down and the guys said well done, I joked about wishing I'd get one in music for a change. They read out a couple more winners and then best live band came around. I squeezed Alex's hand.
'And the winners for best live band are...' said...okay, lets call him George. 'All Time Low.'
Jack and Alex's jaws dropped. I could tell they weren't expecting this, they had been up against bands like My Chemical romance so they'd been pretty pessimistic about it. I gave Alex a shove and they both went to collect the award. I had to hold back my laughter as they walked on the stage. They looked completely awe struck that they'd actually won this.
'They look shocked.' Dani whispered in my ear and we both giggled as they came back, Alex holding the massive K.
'The last award is for hero of the year. Now we had only origanlly put one member of a certain band down but we've had so many calls saying that the entire band deserve this award. This band had two members leave, on pretty bad terms, but this didn't stop these 3 young musicians from Tenesee. No they picked them selves up and dusted themselves of, that is why the award goes to Paramore.' he said, what? there must be a mistake? we weren't up for this award.
'Paramore?' George repeated
'Hayley.' Said Alex and I snapped out of my daze and stood up, walking to the stage. George smiled at me as I walked on.
'Now the Hero Of The Year is the only catigory where the winner can make a speech. The mic is yours.' he said and handed me another massive K and stepped away from the mic. I walked up to it feeling completely sick, it felt wrong to accept this award just because the guys had left. It practically burned my hand with guilt just holding it. I tryed to speak but my throat closed up, I felt the blood rush to my head and I blacked out.
As soon as I saw Hayley hit the floor as was up and at the stage. The guy giving the awards apologised profusley, the whole place had gone silent. Hayley's eyes flutter open and she groaned, going a sort of green colour.
'I'm gonna throw up.' she mumbled
'She just needs air.' I said and picked Hayley up into my arms. The whole room watched me as I carried my broken girl in my arms. I looked down at her pale, tinted green face and wondered what was going through her mind. We got outside and Hayley opened her eyes suddenly. She pushed me away and landed on her knees on the ground before throwing up violently on the street. I crouched next to her, holding back her hair and rubbing her back. When she was done I helped her stand up but she was shaking violently.
'We don't deserve an award for having my best friends leave the band.' she said weaky, some of the colour returning to her face. 'I don't want to be congratulated on argueing with my friends so much that they can't stand me anymore. I don't want to be awarded for carrying on, when we really ony did it for our fans.' she said and sat down on the curb and threw the massive K down the street and a bus went over it. 'How do you guys do it Alex?' she said as I sat next to her.
'What do you mean?' I asked, slightly confused.
'You've been with the guys for 9 years and not one of your members have left, how did you manage that?'
'We push the stupid bull shit of to the side.' I said and she looked at me 'We work out our arguements instead of letting them get to us.'
'We should of done that, we felt the strain and it all tumbled in.' she said, I needed to say what I's been thinking for a while now.
'Hayley, you guys are better off without them. If you can't stand to be in the same room with Josh, or if it hurts to much to just talk to his wife them he's just not supposed to be in your life. They were right about one thing, you guys did dust yourselves off but theres still the element of them lingering. I know it's hard to forget, especially with your and Josh's past but I think its what you need to do.' I said 'just forget.'
She studied my face for a second before speaking. 'You're right and I've known for a while it's what I need to do, there's just a part of me screaming not to let them go. I've known them sinse my first days of school, they've been there with me through everything. I don't want to let them go, even if I have to.' I looked at the pained look in her eyes. I couldn't stand to see her so broken and frail, I didn't want to ask what had happened exactly, it would just hurt her more. For now she just needed comforting.
NOTE: I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT I MADE MOST OF THIS STUFF UP AND THIS WAS NOT ACTUALLY WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN THE FARROS AND PARAMORE. :) enjoy xx
I could tell by the look on Taylor's face when he opened the door and I was there he wasn't expecting it.
'Alex?' he said slightly confused 'Is Hayley with you? Is she alright? We saw the Kerrang awards, what happened?'
'She's fine and not here.' I said and Taylor frowned 'I kinda just wanted to talk to you and Jeremy.'
'Okay, he's here right now.' Taylor said opening the door for me. I walked in and followed Taylor to his living room where Jeremy was sprawlled out on the couch. Kerrang playing on the TV. He looked up and smiled at me though there was slight confusion in his face.
'Hey Alex?' he said and stood up
'He said he wanted to talk to us?' Taylor said carefully.
'It's nothing bad guys.' I said chuckling, they probably thought I was here about Hayley, which was half true. We all sat dwon on the couch.
'So what is it? Jeremy asked.
'If you guys don't mind, could you tell me what happened with Josh and Zac?' I asked 'the whole truth.' they looked at each other for a breif second and Jeremy nodded slighly.
'Well in January we were starting to write this new album, when the 5 of us were in the band. It was pretty stressful and Josh had yelled at Hayley and she had ran out crying. When she did Josh just rolled his eyes.' Taylor started 'I started yelling at him, telling him it as stupid to have made her cry but he just didn't care. I think something was wrong with him but I didn't ask. We just wanted to get this album done. It was getting to the point where just being in each other's company pissed us off. I told him that he had to suck it up or we'd never get this album finished. I told him that Hayley worked just as hard as he did and there was no need to yell at her.' He took in a sharp in take of air before continuing as if it was painful to remember these things. 'He turned on me then, started screaming about how he worked the hardest and all Hayley did was stand in the front and look pretty and she got all the attention, and she liked it. Called her an attention seeker, told us she didn't actually care about any of us or the band, she just wanted the fame.' Taylor sighed and rubbed his temples
'That was when I cracked.' Jeremy said with a cold laugh 'Completely flipped out on him and I shouldn't have, I just couldn't stand him talking about Hayley likr that. The boy who was supposedto be our best friend and used to love her. Speaking about her like that. I can't even remember half the things I said but they must have been pretty bad. Just when I finished yelling at him Hayley came back in. Josh threw his guitar down and told us he was quitting, he couldn't stand to be in the same room as us anymore and stormed out.'
'Zac went after him, telling us to give him time to cool down, he's help him try to calm but the next day he called and said Josh was dead serious about quitting and he wouldn't feel right staying without him. They both left.' Tayor finished.
'Have you ever tried to make it right?' I asked 'Called them or anything?' Jeremy laughed.
'All the time. Josh screens our calls and Zac said we should just give up, he's made up his mind. Hayley doesn't even know what Josh said about her, we just told her we'd had an arguement about music. Then his video came out, the one where he completeley trashed the band. Everyone says his jab at me was totally uncalled for but I don't blame him for it after the things I said.'
I woke up in my bed with a splitting head ache, I sat up and then threw up into the bucket Dani had placed there the night before. I groaned and buried my head in my pillow, I could hear the blood in my ears and my head was pounding.
'Hayley, are you awake?' said Taylor's familiar voice from the door. I opened one eye and looked at him before closing them again.
'No.' I mumbled, he chuckled and walked in. Sitting on the end of my bed.
'How you feeling?'
'crap. How do I look?'
'Crap.' Tay said and I looked at him. 'What? I wasn't going to lie to you.'
I laughed through it hurt my head like hell.
'Guess what?' he said.
'Monster has been requested for the new Transformer's movie soundtrack.' he continued when I didn't reply. I was about to speak but ended up throwing up into the bucket again.
I looked at this broken shell of the girl I used to know as Hayley Williams. The girl who skips on stage and has something against natural colours for her hair. Not the girl who throws awards under buses and starts throwing up at the memory of someone she used to love. I patted her back.
'It's okay.' I said soothing as another round of sick came up. She moaned and curled up in her blankets. I changed the subject.
'So me and Jerm are stumped for ideas for the Monster music video.' He said 'Got any ideas?'
Her head poked out from under the blankets. 'Actually' she said and launched into telling me about a hospital and explosions and how we had to run away from them. It sounded amazing, I was just pretty bad at describing it.
'That sounds amazing Hayles.' I said and she smiled and a fragment of the old Hayley shone through the pale, slightly green tinged, girl sitting in front of me.
'Really really.' I replied and she giggled. Maybe the old Hayley was somewhere in there after all.
After a couple of days of being bed ridden I was well enough to get up. I had spent all the time I was quarantined to my room by Dani on the phone to Alex who was back in Maryland at the moment. He was tellling me all about all these new idea's he's had for music and how they'd thought of a great music video for Time Bomb. It was great just to hear about his life for once. I also got called by Tay and Cass a couple of times. It was great, Tay was telling me all about this new tour the guys were doing of the UK next year and Cass told me she was going to launch a solo EP and sang a couple of the songs she'd thought of. It was great just to hear how amazing everyone elses lives were at the moment instead of how bad mine felt right now. One good thing was we'd relesed the 3 new songs online for poeple to download and they were nearing some of our most sucessful songs ever. Also we were going to be filming the music video in a few days. Jeremy had talked to Shane and he was gonna direct it for us. We'd got camera crews and he said he'd manged to get us allowed into an abandoned hospital for the day. I had talked to him on the phone yeterday and he was telling me all about how maybe she could cause the explosions in some way and also maybe a scene where we're sitting in water. It all seemed to be great so I just went along with it. I hadn't mentioned to any of them that at the end of my dream me and the guys had been engulfed in smoke and explosions.
ANOTHER NOTE: I know I've got all my timings pretty fucked up and the Moster Video should have come out while they were at warped and I got alot wrong but hey, it's a fiction after all ;) xx
I stood waiting to film the last scene of everything blowing up, it was about 2 in the afternoon and we'd already been here for 6 hours.
'Alright guys!' said Shane 'Pay no attention to the 1 2 3, hopefully all that shit's gonna happen behind you.'
we all laughed nervously 'I like that.' Jeremy said to the cameras, filming the behind the scenes of the music video 'hopefully that will happen behind you.'
'Not just hopefully.' Taylor said to him as the camera walked away.
'Okay lets do this' said Shane and I shot everyone a scared look.
'I really have to pee.' I commented and Taylor laughed and rolled his eyes.
'and action!' said Shane and we ran full speed down the hall way, hearing loud bangs and clatters behind us as we desperately tried to avoid things falling from the ceiling. We got to the end of the hall way and stopped.
'We're alive!' I said, pumping my fist.
'Okay guys so we've got to film the room where you beat up a wall then its just the short filming in the water and we're done.' Shane said and we went and got changed. I took off the clothes that Cass and Tay had helped me choose and pulled on the sort of dirty cream coloured jeans and strap top. The guys had been joking earier that it was like wall camo. I headed over to hair and make up where they quickly touched up my makeup.
'I've had a great idea for your hair in this.' said my stylist, Zavier.
'Go crazy.' said 'Do what you think will look best to it.' he smiled,we'd always got on really well cause really I just let him do what he wanted to my hair. He pulled it into a middle parting and I sat as he crimped it up. It stuck up and looked dry and I looked slightly mad but it would be amazing for this part.
'It looks awesome Zavier!' I said, running my hand through it, admiring his work in the mirror.
'Knock 'em dead kid' he said as I left, he usually said this to me, everytime he styled my hair. I gave him a high five and wandered back to the set. Taylor and Jeremy we're getting set up with their instuments. I was handed a microphone that had a wire. It was kinda my thing to have mic's with wires. I just preferred them, I don't even know why. Then we were unleashed onto the wall, battering our fists against it and I kicked it once and stubbed my toes pretty bad. Jeremy almost broke his pinkie and was made to put ice on it and Taylor practically did a back flip and fell over. Once the scene was finsihed and we we're utterly bruised and broken we headed back to the dressing room where I was put into a dress and had make up put on along with bright red lipstick.
'No point in styling your hair again.' Zavier said 'You're about to get it wet.' and i was led to a room with , what could only be described as, a massive hot tub. We were helped in and I was surpised that it was really warm water because the room around us was freezing.
'It's warm.' I said happily as people helped me lay back in the water. We were pushed around for a second before we were perfectly alined.
'Right so I want you to all have your eyes closed and Hayey just as you're about to sing you should open yours but Jeremy, Taylor, keep yours closed okay?' we all nodded and Shane yelled action. I shut my eyes, enjoying for a moment the warm water around me. When I opened my eyes and started to sing I nearly had a heart attack, there was a camera floating straight above us. We had to lie in there for an hour or so before we got the take perfect. We were helped out and people handed us soft towels which I was greateful for.
'How pruney are you?' one of the sound guys asked Jeremy.
'I don't even care, I was falling asleep there.' he replied and I chuckled.
When we got out we changed into the dry clothes and went to hang out in our trailor for a while while my hair dried off. By the time I actually got home it was well into the morning, I tried to, as quiety as possible, open the door. I noticed to pairs of men's nikes sitting at the door. I walked in and saw Alex, fast asleep, on my couch. I completely melted. He'd come to surprise me and I was out. I walked over to him and kneeled down beside the couch. I pushed a starnd of his, now brown, hair from his face and he woke up. His eyes squinting at me.
'Hey.' I whispered to him.
'Hey, my surprise visit when down hill when Dani told us you'd be gone all day.' he said sleepily.
'I'm sorry.' I said and he yawned.
'It's fine, you're here now.' He said and I kicked off my shoes and curled up with him on the couch. It was complete bliss, just lying with him. After a couple of minutes I could tell he'd fallen asleep again and I snuggled into his chest. I woke up the next morning alone on the couch. I sat up and Alex wasn't around. I wandered into the kitchen where Jack and Dani were deeply inspecting each others tonsils. I cleared my throatand they pulled away, Dani shot my a look while Jack looked away. His face gone bright red.
'Where's Alex?' I asked.
'He went out about 10 minutes ago.' Dani said 'He said that Zack and Rian's flight had been delayed and he had to go pick them up.'
'Oh. do you know when he'll be back? I asked, aiming it more at Jack.
'Couple of hours maybe?' he said and I gave a long sigh.
'Okay.' I said, then looked at them. Jack was sitting looking extremely embarassed and by the look on Dani's face I could tell that she wanted me to leave them alone.
'Well, I'm gonna go have lunch with Jeremy and Taylor.' I lied and ran up stairs to get changed. Quickly texting them to meet at our favourite coffee shop in 10 minutes. Within a minute I had two replies and I left. It was a five minute walk from all our houses to Bliss. Which was what the coffee shop was called. It was a totally cheesy name but their food was to die for. We used to come here all the time when we were kids. Me, Josh, Zac Jerm and our old guitaist Hunter had discorvered it and it sorta became our place. Everyone that worked there knew our names but we hadn't been for a while. When I got there I noticed Taylor and Jeremy were already there. Sitting in the squishy seats next to the window. I walked in and the bell above the door gave a cheerful chime.
'Vanilla latte please.' I said to Paulo. The owner of the place.
'Hayley!' he said in a thick italian accent 'It is good to have all of Paramore back again'
'It's great to be back.' I said as he handed me the cup holding my coffee. I wandered over and sat down next to Taylor on the couch.
'Hey Hayles.' said Jeremy and I smiled.
'Yellooo.' I said cheerfully taking a huge mouthfull of coffee.
'You're awfully cheerful today.' said Taylor.
'Yep, there's a reason for that.'
'and what would that be?'
'Alex came over to surprise me last night.' I said grinning, sipping my coffee slower.
'Aw, so romantic.' Jeremy said with a slight sarcastic tone.
'Yes it is, so don't ruin it for me.' I said giving him a look and he chuckled.
'So what's shakin' with you guys?' I cringed, I was starting to speak like Jack.
We sat for a good hour or so just talking and laughing. The coffee giving me a somewhat pleasant buzz of energy. It all went down hill though when a certain pair of brothers walked in.
'Oh crap.' Taylor muttered.
'Just ignore them, pretend we haven't noticed them.' Jeremy said, suddenly becomimg interested with the shape of our table. I kept an eye on Zac and Josh through my hair. I sae them both turn around and see us. My heart stopped when Josh spoke. Addressing all 3 of us.
'Well if it isnt the heroes of the year.' he said, the venom in his voive stung me.
'Josh.' Taylor said, aknologing him.
'Really? That's all I'm going to get?' he said sarcastically.
'That's all you deserve.'said Jeremy coolly. Josh gave him a look of pure spite. This was all too much for me to handle, here was the man I'd once loved and thought I's spent my whole life with.
'Josh, cool it.' Zac said trying to pull him away but Josh shook him off his arm.
'Doesn't the flame headed girl have anything to say in this?' he said, spitefully using Alex's nickname for me. I kept my eyes on the table, my fingers going white from gripping the coffee cup so hard.
'Nothing, the attention seeking Paramore front woman has nothing to say?' he said, I felt Taylor tense up next to me. That's it. I wasn't letting them fight my battles anymore and I stood up and looked Josh straight in the eye. I could see he was slightly taken aback by me actually doing something.
'I have lots to say to you Josh but to say them to your face would just be immature but you wanted it so here you go.' I said, finally losing my cool. 'You're uptight, you yell to much, you think your awlays right and most of the time you aren't. You think your the best at everything but you're just a kid but those used to be some of the things I loved about you. I did love you once Josh but times change, people change. You either need to put all the bullshit off the the side that's happened between us or suck it up and just leave it and us alone cause I'm getting tired of having you break my heart and leaving everyone else to pick up the pieces. I'm tired of waking up with an aching chest knowing that I've lost one of my best friend in the world. I'm sick of running. I'm sick of being sad and I'm sick of you making everything worse.'
Josh's face was shocked, his mouth hanging wide open. He opened it and closed it a couple of times, trying to speak but looking like a fish.
'Come on guys.' I said to Jeremy and Taylor and I walked out the door. Them on my heels, we got a couple of streets away and then I let out a relived sigh.
'That was amazing Hayley!' Jeremy said and I laughed, feeling like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders.
'I need chocolate pancakes.' I said and Taylor and Jeremy laughed.
'Then you shall have chocolate pancakes!' Taylor said.
'Alex's pancakes.' I stated 'you guys have to taste them they are the most amazing thing you'll ever eat.'
'Then I say let Alex make us 3 batches of pancakes!' Jeremy said, grabbing me in a piggy back. I laughed as he started to run back to my house.
Alex made a sky high pile of pancakes for all of us and I sat with Alex, Jeremy, Taylor, Jack, Dani, Rian and Zack. Munching on record breaking amounts of pancakes.
'So what's the celebration for?' Dani said through a mouthful of pancakes and syrup.
'Hayley completeley let what was in her mind out today and had a good yell at Josh.' Tay said and everyone stared with their months hanging open. We burst out laughing at their confused expressions.
'The look on his face when you had finished.' Jeremy said, sniggering immatrely. I just smiled at him.
'I feel great.' I said 'Like a huge weight has been taken of my shoulders and the gaping whole in my chest is healing. I feel...I feel...' I tried to place the word.
'Weightless' Jack said and I nodded. the whole table then burst into a chorus of weightless before we all started laughing.
In the last five minutes I've seen Hayley smile more than she has since January. The old girl who skips on stage and doens't like natural hair was back and better than ever. All three of me, Jermemy's and Hayley's phone's beeped, exactly one after the other. We looked a each other.
'Creepy.' Hayley said as we all pulled out our phones.
'Twitter.' I said
'Same.' Hayley and Jeremy said simultaiously. We had set it so that our phone's would only notify us if we got a mention from someone we follow. I opened it and my jaw dropped.
'Josh.' Jeremy said
'Same.' I said
'Do you guys have twit longer's?' Hayley said and I noticed that it was, we both nodded. The table had gone silent as we all opened the messages.
Taylor. Out of all the people I've hurt in all this you're the one might regret the most. I swear before you joined the band I was nicer. I wish I'd been in the band longer so i could see your talents fully, you make a great lead guitarist and you'll take the band far. I hate the fact you joined us just as we began to have problems. I should never have let what happened happen and more than anything I would just like us to be on better terms. I wish I could say all this to your faces but I've hurt you all enough already. I'm sorry. -Josh
We switched phones and read the other's messages.
Jeremy, there is so much I want to say to you and yet it's so hard to put it into words. The first words should be that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the things I said to you and you're right about everything. In no way should you regret the things you said to me. Only now do I see that everything you said to me on that day was true. I can only hope you'll forgive me, I'm beginning to realize how much I depend on you especially to keep me calm and the one time that you couldn't I shut you all out. I can only hope you'll understand. -Josh P.S. I'm sorry I didn't go to your wedding, I did get the invitation and I hope you and Kat will be happy together forever.
Hayley, the things I could say to you would break my heart just to think about them. You are the one I hurt the most, and you are probably the one who didn't deserve it the most. I'm sorry I broke your heart. I'm sorry I didn't even try to fix it. I'm just sorry for every single thing I've done to you and I regret ever letting you go. I love you Hayley, not that way, you're my little sister and you always have been since the day Zac brought you home when you were 15. I hope one day you will consider me your big brother again. I miss you and I'm sorry. -Josh
By the time we'd finished reading them all Hayley was in tears and I could feel them stinging in my eyes, threatening to make me look like a whimp. I tried to hold them in but caught sight of one roll down Jeremy's cheek before he whipped it away quickly.
'I have to see him' Hayley said and ran from the room and out the front door. Slamming it shut behind her. I looked up at Alex who had a torn expression on his face.
'She'll be fine.' I said and he nodded.
I banged my fist on his door before I could change my mind about coming. He answered it a minute later and when he saw me he braced himself, like I was going to hit him. Instead I just threw my arms around him and broke down crying. He seemed shocked at first but them folded me carefully into his arms and I breathed in his familiar scent. It brought back so many memories but now they seemed a lot happier than they used to be. We both pulled away.
'I'm sorry.' we both said, then burst out laughing.
'I meant every word I said.' he said looking at the ground.
'I know Josh.' I said and he looked up.
'I listened to the new songs by the way.' he said carefully
'What did you think?' I said
'It made me realize that you do better without me holding you down.' he said, I shook my head.
'It was as stressful but we did it.' I said, he nodded.
'So, are we cool?' he said 'That sounds childish...are we on better terms?'
'Of course we are Josh, you're my brother and you always have been.' I said 'Always will.'
3 months later
I ripped open the present Jack had given me, it was wrapped in JAGK Christmas paper. I pulled out a pair of bright red jeans. I smiled and thanked him, I loved them ever though I had 2 pairs nearly exactly the same. I was sitting in Alex's living room with Jack, Dani, Rian, Zack Tay and Cassadee, They were all slumped on sofas but me and Jack sat cross legged on the floor. Tomorrow I had to get back to Nashville to spent New Year's with my family and the Farro's family. Over the last few months Josh and I had slowly started to patch up our relationship. Zac had fallen straight back into place with the guys like nothing had happened but Josh had taken a little more work than that. I didn't even care, he was back in my life and we were friends again and that's all i need. Zack chucked a red parcel at me.
'Hope you like it.' he said 'I had help from Tay in picking it out.' I grinned at them both and tore of the wrapping paper. Inside was a pair of jeans that were bright green and had black stars printed all over them. I loved them alot, I'd never had a pair like them before.
'Thank's guys!' I said, smiling nonstop.
'Okay so there's one more for you Hayley.' Alex said sitting behind me and wrapping his arms across my shoulders, handing me quite a small, silvery present. I kissed his cheek sideways and carefully ripped of the paper. There was a deep blue box inside and I prized it open. Inside was a perfect heart shaped necklace.
'I love it.' I breathed and turned it over in my fingers and engraved into the back was the words "Property of A.W.G."