Hello everybody and welcome to "150 Things I'm Not Allowed To Do In The Capitol" the only fan fiction where you can read all the messed up things that could have happened in "Catching Fire"! May the odds ever be in your favor!


"I can't believe President Snow is forcing us to play in the Hunger Games again!" complained Katniss as she sat at the training station.

"I know but there's nothing we can do about it," said Peeta.

"Maybe not!" exclaimed Katniss in excitement.

"What do you mean, wait you're not thinking about running off to District 13 with Gale are you!" shouted Peeta as his eyes widened and he put his hand over his mouth like a little girl.

At that Katniss gave Peeta a good slap upside the head.

"Ouch!" yelled Peeta.

"Much better, anyway I was thinking why don't we screw with the Capitol as much as possible before we die!" yelled Katniss. It was perfect.

"That's a great idea Katniss!" squealed Peeta as he tried to hug Katniss which only got him a punch to the stomach.

"What you kids doing?" asked Finnick as he walked over towards Katniss and Peeta.

"Planning to mess around with President Snow's head," answered Katniss with a mischievous and deadly smile.

"Count me in!" shouted Finnick as he fist pumped in excitement.

"Don't you dare think you can have fun without me!" hissed Johanna as she snuck up behind Peeta which of course made him scream.

"Fine, you know what we should make a list and I know exactly what to call it!" sang Katniss.

This Quarter Quell was going to be funny!

1. I will not let anyone know about the list.

Katniss, Peeta, Finnick and Johanna were all sitting and working on the first five rules when all of the sudden a Morphling popped up from behind Johanna and Finnick.

"Hey guys what's…" the Morphling couldn't even finish her sentence before Katniss shot an arrow at her.

"What, she can just take more morphling," said Katniss while everyone looked at her.

"She's dead Katniss," explained Johanna.

"Oh well no one even knew her name anyway," Katniss replied with a shoulder shrug.

2. I will not shave off President Snow's beard.

The four tributes quietly snuck into Snow's mansion passing every single peacekeeper.

"Shaving cream," ordered Peeta as they leaned over the sleeping President, his lips making some sort of kissing motion.

"Razor," Peeta demanded after he had lathered Snow's face, his skin was as white as the shaving cream. Peeta began to work on shaving his beard.

"Katniss, go easy on me!" Snow screamed in his sleep. At that Katniss threw up on the mansion's floor. Finnick swallowed a little vomit and Johanna had a disgusted look on her face.

"It is done!" said Peeta in a soft yet proud whisper as he marveled at his work,

The next morning…

President Snow woke up to the sound of chirping Mockingjays and the smell of his white rose. He had the most wonderful of dreams.

He took his hand to his face to find that his beard, his luxurious beard was gone! Gone!

Snow ran to his mirror, his face was hairless and covered in scratches. Teenage shaving.

"My beard!" he shrilled.

3. I will not turn Jabberjays into a living music player.

They had done it. That is train the jabberjays to sing "Sexy And I Know It" by LMFAO.

"In a one, and a two and a three!" yelled Johanna as the jabberjays began to sing.

"When I walk on by, girls be looking like damn he fly

I pimp to the beat, walking down the street in my new lafreak, yeah

This is how I roll, animal print, pants out control,

It's RedFoo with the big afro

And like Bruce Lee I've got the claw

Girl look at that body, Girl look at that body, Girl look at that body

I work out

Girl look at that body, Girl look at that body, Girl look at that body

I work out

When I walk in the spot, this is what I see

Everybody stops and they staring at me

I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it

I'm sexy and I know it, I'm sexy and I know it

When I'm at the mall, security just can't fight 'em off

When I'm at the beach, I'm in a speedo trying to tan my cheeks

This is how I roll, come on ladies it's time to go

We headed to the bar, baby don't be nervous

No shoes, no shirt, and I still get service

Girl look at that body, Girl look at that body, Girl look at that body

I work out"

4. I will not use Pokemon as weapons in The Hunger Games.

Katniss vs. Peeta.

Katniss sent out Pickachu.

"Go Chimchar!" yelled Peeta.

Chimcar used Ember.

Pickachu used Thunderbolt.

"Fools! Go Reshiram!" said Johanna as he summoned the Legendary Pokemon.

"Reshiram use Fusion Flare!" Johanna gave a wild battle cry as her Reshiram destroyed Katniss's Pickachu and Peeta's Chimchar.

"Victory!" yelped Johanna as she began to do the Chicken Dance.

5. I will not show "The Hunger Games" movie trailer to our favorite victors.

Finnick had been able to steal a computer from Effie and there was only one thing to do with it, watch "The Hunger Games" movie trailer.

"I am so freaking excited!" squealed Peeta as Finnick went to Youtube and clicked the trailer.

Two minutes and thirty six seconds later…

"I can't believe I'm played by Jennifer Lawerence, she's like twenty!" hissed Katniss after the trailer was finished.

"She's kind of hot," said Finnick.

"Nah, I think Haliee Steinfield would have been better," remarked Johanna.

"You're lucky you're not in this film, I'm played by the guy from Journey 2!" complained Peeta.

"Who cares, did you see Seneca Crane's beard! It was awesome!" shouted Katniss. They all nodded in agreement, Seneca Crane's beard was awesome.

Hope you all liked. I don't own anything.







Or Katniss will get you! I mean it!