Welcome! This is a new story I've been working on. I'm just putting in this chapter to see what the response is like. Whether I continue with it or not depends on the feedback. It's up to you guys. So please read and review, it'll help me know whether you will want to read more. THANX xxx
The Hogwarts Express chugged along the train tracks just as it had hundreds of times before, the rhythmic bouncing of its travel served almost as a comforter to Harry. He was sitting in a compartment, alone, and couldn't quite believe that this would be the last time that he would be sitting on the famous train. They were heading towards Kings Cross after a long year retaking all the classes and exams they had missed during the year before the Battle of Hogwarts. The school itself had only taken six months to rebuild and all those in Harry's year that were still alive had been called back so that they could graduate. Yesterday had been that day and now they were heading home.
He watched as they passed rolling hills, wheat fields and pastures where herds of cows grazed; the sky was a smouldering grey, yet the threat of rain didn't come close to destroying all the beauty Harry could see. He rolled his eyes at himself. All the sentimentality of little things had him feeling more feminine then he liked. Resting his head back against the seat he sighed softly. It didn't help that he was sitting on his own, having someone else with him would have helped but Ron and Hermione were off groping each other in the toilets and the rest of the Gryffindor's were busy integrating with the other students. The end of the war had meant the end of hostility between houses and although there was still healthy competition, everyone pretty much got along, or were at least civil to each other. He didn't mind, not really, he was happy that there was no more fighting, but it took some time to get used to the Slytherin's being nice and he hadn't fully gotten there yet.
The one thing he was looking forward to was going home. He knew Sirius and Remus were waiting for him back in London. He had gently declined his best friends' offer to find a flat together, he couldn't imagine living with those two at all. He would feel like the biggest third wheel in the world and they would feel guilty about not spending much time with him. He didn't need that and so he had asked his godfather whether he could live with them. Even though Sirius and Remus were bonded, he would never feel out of place there, it just wasn't possible. Grimmauld was the only true home he had ever had and to get the chance to live there for reasons other than hiding from enemies was the one thing he really wanted. Sirius, of course, and said yes immediately, bouncing around like a child and gushing at a calmer Remus; though the werewolf was happy too, Harry saw the mirth in his amber eyes.
The thought of what was ahead of him had excitement churning his stomach and his pulse racing. Any chance of falling asleep to pass time was out of the question and he wished he had brought a book with him or something. He had only packed once Ron started, which was late, as usual, so he just chucked everything into his trunk and forgot about gruelling hours spent on the train.
Pushing his glasses up his nose, he rubbed the back of his neck and sighed again, this time a little more harshly. He remembered the first time he had sat on this train, it was the place that he and Ron really became friends, he would never forget it. A lot of things had changed since then. He wasn't the puny little boy he had been, he was nearly nineteen now and he had grown considerably; he stood at five-ten, which while not massive, wasn't short either. Years of Quidditch and fighting had made his body lean and sinewy, giving him muscles so tightly toned that under clothes it gave him the illusion of being skinny, without them however, it was a different matter. His hair may still be a mass of unruly black locks and his eyesight poor, but at least his glasses were new, sleek black frames, rectangular instead of round and his clothes were a little less baggy, although his wardrobe did need updating; something he would do once settled at home.
He had been more than just a boy the minute he stepped foot in Hogwarts but now, on this train, he was a man heading into a life that had a good chance of actually being worth living. The realisation of that blew him away.
A knock on the door of the compartment made him jump slightly and he turned to see Blaise Zabini chuckling at him from the other side of the glass. Harry motioned for the Slytherin to come in and he did, closing the door behind him with a click.
"Hey." The boy grinned, "I'm surprised to find you all alone." He flopped down opposite Harry, slouching in his seat and letting his legs fall open. A position that Harry always thought of as being overly suggestive but he had never told him that. Mainly because Zabini was most likely doing it on purpose.
"Hmmm." Was Harry's noncommittal reply, which only served to make the boy smile wider.
Blaise was one of Hogwarts most gazed upon male students along with Draco Malfoy and, of course, himself. With his height, high cheekbones and dark, velvety-looking skin, he had a lot going for him the looks department. And he knew it. Blaise was more than fond of physical intimacy with anyone and anything he deemed attracted. Harry happened to be one of those things and had been passing off Zabini's advances since most of the Slytherin's had switched sides just before the end of the war.
"Where's your girlfriend?" he asked Harry, slowly raising an eyebrow over a smooth brown eye.
Shrugging, the young wizard nibbled his bottom lip, "Not sure, probably off with Luna somewhere." No doubt Ginny was off gossiping with the girls. She had been doing that a lot recently and he knew he was a repeated topic of conversation for them. Everything he did was discussed by them, to the point where he wondered whether he could take a piss without a bulletin going out. Their relationship was strained, but which relationship wasn't. He was sure once they were out of the clutches of certain schoolmates that things would get better.
Blaise's eyes travelled the length of his body and back and Harry couldn't restrain from rolling his eyes and chuckling softly. He understood that sexuality wasn't important to wizards but being hit on by a guy was still a little unusual to him. He was raised in a houseful of conservative muggles after all, they weren't so understanding and Blaise wasn't exactly subtle, he came on strong and unashamedly, something that girls didn't really do. Over all though, he was a good guy. The one Slytherin that Harry truly considered a friend as of yet.
"If you were mine, I wouldn't leave you alone on a train full of adoring fans. And I wouldn't be sitting over here, fully clothed either." Blaise drawled, a slight accent seeping through as it did when he was highly aroused, angry or drunk.
Harry laughed, "Well, I guess it's a good thing that I'm not yours then, for my sanity."
Blaise smirked, "It won't be long before you get bored of little weaslette sex and come begging for someone to take charge. I'll be waiting mio amore." Even Harry wasn't immune to the sensual lilt of the Italian endearment but he managed to hide the shiver that ran up his spine by shifting in his seat. He wasn't gay, he just liked the attention; he had been denied a lot as a child, including the caring nature of others and now he wanted nothing else. Blaise wasn't a fan of his, in fact he barely cared that Harry had killed Voldemort, he wanted Harry for what he was as a person, attractive inside and out, and that warmed the teen's belly somewhat.
"Sure, I have your number." Harry teased and Blaise sunk his teeth into his bottom lip and winked at him. "How come you're not with Malfoy and the others?" he asked after a moment of silence.
Zabini scratched at his stomach through the white shirt he had on, "I want to talk to you." He purred, but when Harry didn't say anything back, he sighed, "They were busy talking about being home with their parents. I didn't feel involved."
Harry winced slightly. Blaise's mother had died during the war, murdered by one of Voldemort's lackey's for not giving up Blaise's location. The saviour knew that Zabini hadn't stopped blaming himself since then and he hated it, but he understood. He had the weight of the deaths of so many innocent people on his shoulders too. It was hard to let go.
"If you need anyone...you know, to talk to. I'm always here for you." Harry spoke awkwardly and unsure of what he was actually saying. "If you need some company, I'll be at Grimmauld." Blaise would be living alone the Zabini manor and Harry couldn't imagine having so much space to himself. He would go crazy and this boy definitely didn't deserve that.
Blaise's aura had completely changed; it wasn't cocky now but relaxed and his smile was genuinely grateful. His eyes had softened too and Harry wished they wouldn't hold so much admiration. "Thank you, Harry. That means a lot."
"I mean it too. Owl me at any time or just pop over."
"We could have sleepovers." Blaise smirked and Harry chuckled at how quickly he turned around. "Pillow fights and...midnight feasts."
"You're such a girl." Harry muttered, not being able to remove the smile from his face.
Zabini licked his lips, "You love it."
By the time the train stopped at the station, Harry was more than ready to see Sirius and Remus and be taken home. He was tired. It turns out an afternoon of talking to Blaise took more energy out of him than anything else, but he wouldn't have it any other way. Ginny came in at one point, saw Blaise and immediately snogged Harry to make him jealous. The girl liked to brag that she had the saviour of the wizarding world and Harry had yet to stop her. He didn't want to ruin anything. She was his best friends sister after all.
He said goodbye to Blaise first and then managed to catch up with Ron and Hermione; the latter apologised profusely about leaving him alone and pulled him into the tightest squeeze he'd ever experienced. Both of his best friends would be going to the newly rebuilt and refurnished Burrow for a few weeks, until they found a place for themselves.
"It's fine. I'll see you soon anyway." He said, running his hand up her back before pulling away and smiling at her.
She nodded and her eyes watered. "Yeah, we'll settle in and then come see you." She bit her bottom lip to stop it quivering.
"Come on, 'Mione, it's not like we're leaving him forever. Just a few days." Ron wrapped an arm around her shoulder and winked at Harry.
The witch sniffed and nodded, pretending that she wasn't getting upset. "I know. Well we best be off. Sirius and Remus are going to be dying to see you."
The three of them hugged before Harry turned around and made his way to pick up his trunk. It wasn't were it was supposed to be and he frowned, looking over all the other trunks that were awaiting their owners.
"Looking for this?" A voice drawled from behind him, obviously trying to keep excitement behind the pretence of innocence. Harry knew who it was straight away and the grin that spread over his face was involuntary. He turned around to see Sirius beaming at him, standing next to Harry's trunk with Remus at his side. The animagus lived in white wife beaters and black jeans or leather trousers, today it was the latter, and he always had biker boots on his feet, sometimes they even had steel toecaps. Remus on the other hand still had his penchant for tweed and slacks and today was no different. It was what made Remus, Remus, and Harry couldn't imagine him without the smart clothing.
"Hey." He breathed, the words escaping his mouth in a long rush of air, the relief evident. His stomach churned as it usually did at the sight of them. He was just happy they were here and safe; not having to worry about your family being murdered took some time to get used to.
Sirius's eyes warmed and he held his arms out. Harry didn't think twice, just stepped into them and closed his eyes as he buried his head into his godfather's neck. Muscled arms folded around his back and Sirius' chin-length hair tickled his cheek. The man smelt of rain and warm leather, something that Harry found incredibly heady. He never understood how someone could smell so good, especially when that someone spent most of his time working on his motorcycle, sweating away.
"It's so good to see you again." Sirius groaned against him, his arms tightening.
Harry sniffed, "Yeah, I'm glad to be home." He pulled back and turned to Remus, slightly unsure whether the same greeting would be appropriate. Sirius was naturally touchy, not liking to keep much distance between himself and Harry and those others close to them. Remus, on the other hand, was very much a closed book to the teen other then the times were his eyes gave his emotions away.
Harry was grateful when the werewolf, after an obvious internal struggle, held his arms out as well. The young wizard flashed him a smile before stepping into his hold. Both of the men made him feel safe; they were taller and more muscular and older, a little more experienced in life than he was. There was something about them that calmed him, made him feel like he didn't have to stress about a single thing. That's why he wanted to live with them; he needed to be under a roof with people who could care for him instead of the other way around, no matter how selfish it seemed.
He was already feeling better when he pulled away from Remus. "I missed you." He said quietly, aware that there were still some students and parents on the platform with them. Something flashed in the wolf's eyes that Harry couldn't decipher, but he forgot about it the minute the man smiled at him.
"We missed you too. It feels like years since we saw you at Christmas." Remus' hand settled on his shoulder and squeezed.
"Yeah, Harry, we were going crazy without you." Sirius said, his voice a little louder than usual. The teenager raised an eyebrow, not sure whether it was weird or not that he was slightly happy at Sirius' admission. Remus had turned slowly, to give his husband an incredulous look. The man shrugged, eyes wide with innocence. "What?"
Harry chuckle, "Don't worry Remus, I was losing my mind without you two too." He didn't know why he said it, it just felt like the right thing. There was some truth in it too. Sirius stuck his tongue out at the werewolf and then narrowed his eyes. "Okay, calm down boys." He teased the older men, "Let's get home, I'm dying to have a nap in front of the fire."
The animagus threw an arm around Harry's shoulder, pulling the boy into his side. "Yeah, Remus, let's go."
The werewolf rolled his eyes, huffed and grabbed Harry's trunk before the three of the apparated home. When number 12 Grimmauld place pushed itself between two muggle homes, Harry felt his chest swell slightly. The last time he was here it had been in the Christmas holidays and Remus was right, it felt like it had been ages ago. He could barely remember it, but that probably had something to do with copious amounts of firewhiskey courtesy of Sirius. Now though, just seeing the place removed a weight from his shoulders.
They let him in first and he wandered down the narrow corridor, feeling a little enclosed until it widened up. The house was looking a lot better than it had during the war; both of its inhabitants had spend a lot of time redecorating and the place didn't come close to what it used to be. The peeling wallpaper had been removed and the walls painted white, playing host to a number of photographs; the moving, wizarding kind, of him and them and all their extended family. There were a few of his parents too, which always made him smile. The floors had been replaced with fresh, solid oak and the stench of abandonment was long gone.
"We thought you could have the spare room on the top floor." Remus said as he joined Harry at the bottom of the stairs. "We've cleared it for you and you can decorate it as you wish."
"It's right opposite ours, just in case you need anything." Sirius added quietly, almost shyly.
Harry had only been on the fourth floor once, when Sirius was hungover and Remus sent him up with some tea. There was only two bedrooms up there, the doors facing each other. Sirius and Remus had the former's childhood bedroom, which meant that Harry would have Regulus'. He hadn't been expecting the move from his usual bedroom on the second floor that he had shared with Ron but he wouldn't deny that he was grateful.
They took him up there and Sirius opened the door to his new bedroom, letting him walk in first. It was the same wooden floors and white walls but there was huge dark-wooden bed made up with blue sheets, an equally as large french armoire and a chest of drawers. There was a door on the right wall, which was open, revealing the bathroom within it; shiny white tiles and sparkling silver appliances from what he could see. It was a large room, just over double the size of his bedroom with the Dursley's, and having so much space to himself was unbelievable.
"This is great. Thanks." He said as Remus put his trunk on the bed.
"No problem, Harry." They said in unison.
Sirius walked over to the bed and opened Harry's trunk before the teen could stop him. A wave of Harry's hand and everything in the case had disappeared, having been put in its rightful place in the room; all his clothes either hung up or folded, his broom leaning in the corner and his toiletries in the bathroom. His godfather smirked at him.
"You didn't have to do that, you know. I've see all kinds of things. Your sex toys wouldn't have phased me."
Harry blushed, unable to help it. It was his godfather speaking after all. "I don't have any sex toys." He muttered quietly, noticing Remus staring at him funnily.
Sirius' eyes widened, "Why the hell not? You're missing out." He beamed, winking teasingly. Remus' chest rumbled and his husband looked at him in an almost guilty way. "Why don't you take a shower, get some fresh clothes on and you can take that nap downstairs while we sort some dinner out."
Frowning, Harry nodded, "Okay." He said as Remus rushed out of the room, Sirius following him with an apologetic look, closing the door behind him.
He had noticed Remus' changing behaviour recently; well actually it had started before the end of the war. The man became more reserved around him and less like the man he had met in his third year. To say he was less fun made Harry feel bad but in essence that's what it was. He still loved the man, that would never change, he just wished he knew what it was that made him keep his distance.
He did as Sirius recommended, stripping himself of his school uniform and waved a cleaning charm over them before folding it all away. He knew he should throw it out but he couldn't quite bring himself to do it yet. Padding into his bathroom, he relieved his bladder and stepped into the shower, closing the glass door behind him. He was tired, it was getting late after all, but the warm water soothed a day of ache from his muscles and plastered his hair to his face. He tipped his head back, letting the water run down over his eyes and lips.
He must have stood there for at least ten minutes before he turned the taps off and stepped out. Grabbing a towel from the rack, he dried himself off roughly and put it back, walking back into his room naked.
He chucked on some shorts and t-shirt before he decided to head downstairs and into the massive living room. The fire was roaring at the other end and he made his way over. He just needed half-an-hours sleep in the warmth and everything would be better. He'd feel relaxed and ready to start his life. There was a bear skin that lay in front of the fireplace and he lay down on it, feeling the fur against his flesh. He closed his eyes, the warmth of the fire glossing over his face, he curled his fingers in the rug and fell asleep.
"You can't behave like that Sirius. Those words...it gets me..."
The man in question huffed like a little boy caught doing something wrong. "I know, I'm sorry but we have to make some kind of move otherwise nothing will ever happen." He pouted, pushing out his bottom lip as he crossed his arms over his chest. They were down in the kitchen, leaning against opposite counters as a beef stew simmered on the stove.
"That's the way it should be. He's straight, Siri...but if he knew then he'd try and do what he thinks is right. He'd be with us just to make us happy." Remus sighed, "That's not fair."
Ever since Harry's seventeenth birthday, when Remus discovered that the young wizard was his other mate, things had been difficult. The werewolf didn't agree with just telling Harry, like Sirius wanted to do. He didn't even want to try and get the boy to want them.
The animagus frowned heavily, "I'm not just sitting back and doing nothing. If you won't act on it then I will. I'll get him to want us. He's only straight because he hasn't spent enough time with us."
"He's got a girlfriend, who is a family friend."
Sirius rolled his eyes, "I don't give a crap about Ginny, Rem. Harry is ours. He belongs to us." When Remus first told him about Harry being his other mate, Sirius had been silently relieved. He had wanted the boy for ages; wanted to grab him and kiss him senseless before bending him over the nearest table. But it wasn't just lust. He loved Harry just as he loved Remus and he knew his husband felt the same. That's why he couldn't understand Remus' reluctance. His husband gave a shaky sigh, lifting his hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. Sirius noticed that the hand was shaking and started to feel a little bad.
"Look, we're not going to tell him." Remus stated, his tone denying Sirius the chance to complain. "But..." he added, making his lover's eyes widen in excitement. "If he falls for us then I'm not going to send him away."
"That's it then. We work on getting him to want us." The animagus grinned.
"But he has to tell us he wants us before we tell him that he is our mate. Okay." Remus pointed a finger at the man opposite him, making sure he was getting his point across firmly.
Sirius huffed, "Yeah, okay. Are you going to be able to flirt with him?"
It wouldn't be a problem for Black, but for Remus it was difficult. The mere mention of Harry with certain 'toys' had Mooney howling inside of him, scrabbling under the surface to get to his mate. Nearly two years he had been denied and it was way too long. They struggled, both the wolf and the man, to find Sirius enough for them anymore and that alone made them feel terrible. But now, living under the same roof as his second and not being able to touch him was his own form of personal torture. He couldn't tell Harry, he just couldn't. If the boy knew then he would see it as he duty to be with them and Remus couldn't deal with that. Mooney could though, he was a dominant after all and in his eyes Harry belonged solely to him and Sirius.
"Not as much as you but I'm hoping that Harry will see that as my normal self. I'm sure Mooney will make himself known sometimes, I just hope he doesn't scare Harry away."
Sirius beamed at him. The expression making his gut tighten and he couldn't help but smile back. The slightly older man sauntered over to him, pressing his body against Remus' and resting a hand on the countertop either side of him.
"You won't scare him away. I'll work on him, by the time Mooney comes out he'll be quaking with the need for us to take him." He brushed his lips along Remus' jaw, a soft stroke of skin. "Can you imagine that? Imagine him begging for your mouth, your cock."
The werewolf shuddered visibly, lifting his hands to grip Sirius' biceps, "Stop, Siri." He breathed, "I...I can't take it."
"You'll have to give in later, babe."
Remus squeezed his eyes closed, trying to contain the emotions bubbling up inside of him. His muscles clenched, trying to keep his body together just as he was trying, desperately to keep his mind in one piece. Lips pressed against his mouth and he responded to his mates affection straight away. Kissing Sirius was something he was well versed with, something he would never tire of either. However, there was always the niggle in the back of his mind; the one that wanted and needed to kiss Harry, to see what he would taste like, how his lips would feel. He smothered the desire by kissing Sirius even deeper.
When he pulled away, he sent the other man a look that he knew he would understand. "I love you." He whispered.
Sirius winked, "Love you too, Rem." He replied. Remus heard the sincerity behind the teasing, he was used to it after all.
"Let me check on dinner." He said, slipping away from his bonded and heading towards the stove. Grabbing a wooden spoon he stirred the pot, inhaling the delicious aroma. "It's ready, I would say. Why don't you go and find Harry while I dish up."
Sirius rubbed a hand over his clean shaven jaw and nodded, "My pleasure." He said before walking upstairs and towards the living room. They had been down there long enough for Harry to have found his favourite spot and fallen asleep. The boy was like a cat; curling up in front of the fire. It was the reason they had acquired that fluffy rug, they knew he would prefer to lie on that rather than the hard wooden floorboards. Sirius had had many a fantasy about the three of them on that rug and knew that when they got their mate that he would make those fantasies come true.
He didn't see it being long before Harry succumbed to their charms. He remembered being young, before Remus had told him about being his mate, and not being able to stay away from him. He had felt something more than platonic for the wolf long before they became a couple. It was a connection of some kind. A lust and desire for the man he knew would be able to satisfy his every need and make him happy for the rest of his life. That feeling didn't disappear at all during the years they were kept apart; they were soulmates after all. Surely Harry felt the same way. Maybe not as strong since they have barely spent any time together at all and almost none alone. Sirius was sure that all that was needed to cement the bond and make Harry want them was time alone with him. Time to make him feel everything he needed to feel.
The only problem he could see was the little Weasley chit that had her claws into their boy. Ginny was fine as a person but stealing Harry away from them wasn't the smartest thing to do. Even if she didn't know. Personally, Sirius could see the relationship wasn't strong. Ginny liked having Harry because he was unique and famous, not because of who he was as a person. If she didn't ruin it herself then Sirius would quite happily ruin it for her.
He was smirking to himself when he walked into the living room and found Harry on the rug. The teen was wearing shorts and a snug white t-shirt, not exactly hiding his body. A tingling started up in Sirius' groin and he tried to ignore it as he padded over and sat down beside his godson. Harry was naturally gorgeous but even more so when he was asleep. The boy had a pretty face; almond shaped eyes, high cheekbones, a straight nose and full lips that were a shade redder than normal. His skin was a smooth honey colour, but the older man couldn't tell whether it was a tan or natural, he'd have to search for tan lines to figure that out.
Reaching out, Sirius ran a hand over Harry's arm, feeling the soft skin under his calloused fingers. The boy's glasses were skewed so he set them right. Harry let out a soft breath and wiggled further into the rug, searching for more comfort in his sleep. Sirius moved his hand to run the back of it over Harry's cheek, to stroke his thumb over those pouty lips. He sucked in a breath when Harry's tongue peaked out to brush his bottom lip and caught the pad of Sirius' thumb as well.
He scooted a little closer, wanting Harry to see him straight away when he opened his eyes. Wanting the boy to want him this close again. "Harry." He said quietly, placing his hand on the boy's hip and shaking gently, feeling the bone beneath his touch. "Come on, baby, wake up." He knew that Harry wouldn't properly hear him and if he did, he wouldn't believe Sirius actually called him baby.
The teenager groaned, turning onto his back, lifting his hips off of the rug in some sort of a stretch. His eyes were still closed, so Sirius leaned over. "Up now, Harry. Dinner's ready." His mouth brushed the shell of Harry's ear as he spoke and when he lifted his head, Harry's eyes were open just the smallest amount, enough that jade peaked through thick, inky lashes.
"Sirius?" The boy groaned again, making the older man's blood simmer. Those doe eyes blinked a few times before opening fully and settling on his godfather. His lips quirked, "Hey."
"Hey there, sleepy. Food's done. Remus is waiting for us."
Harry licked his lips, his mouth feeling a little dry before shaking his head. Sirius' face was right above him when he woke and although he hadn't been expecting it, he didn't mind much. He was used to seeing faces above him when he woke up; he'd spent most his life in the infirmary and sharing a dorm with a load of boys, after all. In fact it was rather comforting having Sirius wake him up gently then Ron screaming at him because he wanted to get to breakfast as quick as possible.
"M'kay. I'm hungry."He murmured, pushing himself up by his elbows. His stomach growled, backing up his statement.
Sirius stood with a laugh and held out a hand, the fire making the tattoos on his knuckles glow orange. "So you are." He said as Harry took his hand and was pulled up. "We've got stew, the best you've ever tasted."
"I've never tasted Remus' cooking before. It's always been Mrs Weasley's."
"Hey, not just Remy's, mine too." They walked towards the stairs that led down to the kitchen.
Harry rolled his eyes, "Stirring doesn't actually count as cooking."
"Yes it does." Sirius smirked, pressing his hand against Harry's back as he led the boy down the stairs. Touching would be one of the steps and he would being doing it constantly from now on. He wanted to get Harry to crave the contact.
"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Siri." The boy laughed, before taking a deep breath in through his nose. "Smells delicious." He said as they walked into the kitchen. Three large bowls of stew were waiting at the end of the long table, some buttered bread on a plate in the middle. Cold bottles of butterbeer awaited them also.
"Thank you, Harry." Remus smiled from his seat.
Sirius followed Harry over, choosing to sit next to him while Remus sat opposite. "Good little housewife, isn't he." He tease, nudging Harry's shoulder.
Harry smirked when Remus raised an eyebrow at his husband, obviously not amused. "Oh, I dunno, seems to me that Remus wears the trousers."
Sirius laughed, "Most of the time, Harry...but I like to have one up every now and then." There was something in his voice that Harry sensed as a little more suggestive then he was going for and the way Remus' eyes narrowed slightly suggested that he heard it too. The young wizard wasn't sure what his godfather was going for, so he just shook his head with a chuckle.
"Tuck in, Harry. I'm sure you're starving." Remus said, not taking his eyes off of Sirius, who shrugged and picked up his own spoon.
Harry followed suit, picking up his spoon and dipping it into the bowl, bringing up a spoonful of meat and vegetables and juices. He slid it into his mouth, ignoring the heat and closing his eyes at the flavours that burst on his tongue. It was delicious and he couldn't stop the moan that escaped his mouth. When he opened his eyes, both men were staring at him, their own spoons paused halfway to their mouths.
"This is amazing. Why haven't you cooked for me before?" He asked the man opposite him, taking another spoonful into his mouth. The meat was so tender it almost melted on his tongue and the stock had some delicate flavours that Harry couldn't decipher but immediately loved.
"You like it?" The werewolf sounded pleased and Harry nodded his reply, "I haven't cooked for you because Molly is always here when you are. She tends to take over everything."
"Well you shouldn't let her." Harry licked a drop from his lip, "Do you cook all the time?"
Remus chuckled, "Someone has to around here and Sirius can't cook at all. He can't even boil an egg."
Harry laughed, "I believe Remus." He said, "I like to bake more than anything, learnt it when I was with the Dursley's. Could you teach me some main dishes?" He asked, hoping Remus would say yes. He wanted time with the wolf alone, so that he could get to the bottom of the problem with him.
The older man stared at him for a while, not even blinking. Harry noticed how his amber eyes darkened and wondered if he was angry with him. Sirius shifted beside him in the silence and Harry heard a thump before Remus jolted in his seat.
"Of course, I'd love to. You'll have to teach me to bake, I'm better at mains than desserts." He was lying. He made a wicked chocolate cake and even better bread, but the more Harry could 'teach' him, the more time they would have together.
The young male grinned, flashing white teeth, "That will be great."
Remus nodded as they all got back to their food. He could feel Sirius' eyes on him and lifted to meet the man's gaze. He was smirking at him but after the swift kick he had landed on Remus' shin, the man wasn't in the mood to amuse him. He glared instead.
They ate in silence for a little while, until it got to the point where Sirius was itching for some conversation. His eyes searched the faces of the other men in the room, looking for something to pick up on. In the end, he just grasped at straws.
"Have you thought about what career you want to go into, Harry?" he asked curiously, grabbing a slice of bread and pulling it apart, popping some into his mouth.
Harry's spoon stilled in his bowl and he looked up, "Oh...erm...not really. I thought I knew, but it turns out that I didn't."
"I thought you wanted to be an Auror?" Remus frowned, wondering what happened to the dream. "You spoke about it quite often."
Letting out a breath, the wizard approached the topic he had hoped to be avoiding. "I changed my mind." He said.
The oldest of the three narrowed his grey eyes, "Why?"
"I just didn't want to continue fighting." Harry admitted, "I'm tired of fighting." He curled the hand atop the table into a fist, uncomfortable with speaking about it. He hadn't even told Ron and Hermione yet, both of whom had their futures planned out. Ron was going to go for being an Auror while Hermione was going to be starting her Healer training in a few weeks, before she even received her N.E.W.T results. Not that she would get anything other than Outstanding in all her subjects. Had she known Harry had changed his mind and didn't know what he was going to do, she would have a fit. So, to make things easier, he didn't tell her. It wouldn't be long before they found out though.
He was pulled from his thoughts by a hand resting on top of his, he shook his head and gave Remus a little smile as the man stroked his hand with his thumb. "That's perfectly understandable, Harry. We don't think any different of you."
"Yeah, you could do anything and it wouldn't matter. As long as you're happy." Sirius patted him on the shoulder.
"Thank you." Harry sighed softly, "I just don't know what I'm going to do yet."
"You have loads of time. Don't rush it." Remus said.
Sirius nodded, "Yeah, it's not like we're working wizards either."
Harry wanted to work. He couldn't image doing nothing for the rest of his life and living on his families fortune. He needed to do something, he just didn't know what that something was yet. "I'm hoping everything will settle in the next few months and I'll find something."
"Settle? What needs to settle?" Remus asked, a pucker between his brows from his frown. Sirius was staring at Harry too, with a similar look on his face. Harry cursed at himself for mentioning it, the last thing he wanted was to spread his issues around.
He looked down at the table, felt Remus hand squeeze his and looked up again. "Erm...it's silly really." They egged him on with a look. "I'm just struggling a little...still. All the changes, it's just...too much sometimes. I'm not sure what to do anymore. I feel useless."
He heard them suck in sharp breaths and then Sirius arm was around his shoulders. His cheeks were flushed pink with his embarrassment and he nibbled on his bottom lip.
"Oh, Harry." Sirius sighed, "I can't believe you feel that way."
"You will never be useless." Remus said, his voice strong. "You are the reason we are all still alive. How could you ever think you're useless."
"You don't need me anymore!" Harry snapped. Guilt flooded him for raising his voice but it had been the first time since the end of the war were he actually confronted his feelings. "There's nothing to fight...nothing to save people from. Everything is dandy and there is nothing for me to do."
"Whoa." Sirius breathed, his eyes wide.
Harry's face crumpled, "Sorry." He whispered, scrubbing a hand over his face. He must still be tired, otherwise he never would have behaved this way.
Remus sent his husband a look before standing up and making his way around the other side of the table, taking a chair with him and sitting down. He grabbed Harry's seat and turned it towards him as Sirius moved to sit next to him. Cupping Harry's face, he lifting the boy's chin so that he looked him in the eyes. The touch made the man's fingers tingle and his heart race but this wasn't about him, it was about Harry.
"If there is one thing that I know in this world it is that there will never, never, be a time where we don't need you." He said, knowing he was taking it a little too far. His voice was huskier then normal; Mooney was trying to come through. Trying to reassure his mate about his worth. "You don't need to being saving people to be worth something. You mean more to us then we can tell you and we want you to be happy."
Harry rubbed at his eyes and nodded, "I know, I'm sorry...I'm just knackered is all. I don't mean any of it."
Sirius snorted, "We're not your little school buddies, Harry. We know you better than they do, no matter how much more time they've spent with you. You haven't got everything off your chest with them and you're feeling a little out of place. It's okay. We're here now and we'll help you be who you want to be."
Taking a deep breath, Harry realised that Sirius was completely right. He struggled to let Hermione and Ron know how he felt because they were so in love that he didn't want to ruin the ecstatic glow they had going on with his problems. And there was no one else at school who he felt as close to. He did feel out of place; there was something that he wasn't getting, somewhere he was supposed to be, yet he couldn't put his finger on it.
"Besides, I think you should be able to take a break from everything. Enjoy yourself for a little while." The animagus added, "There is so much you haven't done yet."
"Yeah, you're right." Harry sighed, "I'll be fine." He lifted a hand to his face and placed it over Remus', giving it a squeeze. The man blinked at him and dropped his hold on Harry's cheeks, giving him a strange look that made the boy's stomach clench.
"Let's finish eating." Remus breathed, "And I'm sure there is ice cream in the freezer for pudding."
Sirius beamed, "Pudding!"
Chuckling, the two other males both rolled their eyes and everyone moved back to their seats. Harry's cheeks were red with embarrassment; he couldn't believe he had let himself behave like that. He hoped they would forget it soon because he definitely wasn't going to do it again. Maybe it was a good thing he had got it off of his chest but he still wished it hadn't been in front of the two men he admired the most.
They made their way through the rest of their meal with small talk about the bookshop Remus had seen for sale and the work Sirius was doing on his motorbike. When Harry had suggested the man took him out for a ride, Sirius' eyes had darkened and he had smirked dangerously, commenting on how he didn't realise that Harry saw him that way. The boy preceded to blush hard and stammer through his next sentence which made the animagus laugh. Remus had watched on quietly and when Harry looked at him for help, he only smirked the same way his husband did.
"I'll get pudding." Sirius stood up, collected the dishes and put them in the sink.
Remus' eyes widened, "Bloody hell, Harry, you must have done something to him. Sirius volunteering to do something...unheard of."
Laughing, the young wizard watched his godfather scoop heaps of mint-choc-chip into three bowls. "Maybe he's just doing it out of the goodness of his heart." Harry teased.
"See." Sirius stuck his tongue out, "Harry knows me." He came around the table, placed a bowl in front of Harry and pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Don't you Harry?"
He must be go crazy, because he was sure that Sirius' voice had turned husky. The sound of it in his ear made him tense in order to fight the shiver that was threatening him. He swallowed thickly, completely confused. Sirius had walked away from him, grabbed the other bowls and settled back in his seat beside him. "Er...yeah." Harry answered finally, realising that he had been asked a question. He shook his head and tucked into his ice cream, wondering what the hell was up with him tonight.
"I think you must have him confused with someone else, cub." Remus said after a while, popping some of his pudding in his mouth and sliding his tongue across the spoon to lick the rest off. Harry's eyes followed the movement, watching the pink flesh press against the utensil before sliding back between parted lips. He frowned when he realised what he was doing and scrubbed at his face with his hand.
"You okay?" Sirius asked, spanning a hand of Harry's back and rubbing slowly.
The teen coughed and nodded, "Yep, I'm just tired is all." He got back to his desert, completely missing the look the two older males shared.
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