a/n: for chi (paperbacks) because she is flawless and I love her (:
no caps on purpose


"what she wanted was really two things;
to be elsewhere and to be somebody at least a version of herself
that made better decisions,
that had thought more clearly."
- j. robert lennon


and molly is a mess of fucked up decisions and screwy thoughts. there's always alcohol on her breath and a cigarette in her mouth, and lucy's always watching her with disapproving eyes but molly doesn't care.

it seems she's forgotten how to care.

/

sometimes she likes to sit on her roof and watch the world below as it passes her by. she doesn't care, usually. okay, she does care-a lot. but girls like her, they don't show weakness. so she plasters a smirk to her face and takes a puff of the white stick in her hands.

sometimes teddy comes to sit up there with her. she never understands why. she's a seventeen year old reject, he's twenty five and has probably got better things to do than bother with her.

but still, he sits and he watches her as she watches the world, and it's peaceful.

/

sometimes she wants to ask why her mum committed suicide. why she left her and lucy and percy for death. what pushed her to that edge. was it molly? was it her father? was it lucy?

what was it that pushed her to that edge?

she spends a lot of time wondering, but she never gets any answers.

/

he kisses her one day and it's like fire meets ice.

his hands go around her neck and he brings her face closer to his and she smiles, actually smiles, for the first time in years. because she's happy. and maybe she doesn't know why exactly his lips are on hers or why he even cares, but she doesn't want to know.

she doesn't want answers because answers screw everything up.

/

this isn't a fairytale though. this will never be a fairytale, because teddy gets engaged to victoire two short months later and molly tries so desperately to hold onto him, but that's the thing about girls like molly.

they're so much better at pushing people away.

/

his hands are all over her again and she's moaning and groaning and she knows this is wrong, but fuck, she just can't help it because he's teddy and she's molly and maybe they're just a broken fairytale, but it works.

and this sneaking around would kill victoire and it's killing molly to not be able to hold his hand in public, but it works and she doesn't want to tip the scale so instead she goes along with it because he's teddy and he's all she's ever wanted.

/

they crash and burn, flames and smoke and all of that.

he yells, she yells, and she pushes him to the point that he turns and walks away and she knows he's not coming back.

she spent all her time with him pushing him away, maybe because she knew he'd never truly be hers, but while she watches him walk away, it hurts more than anything in the world.

she realizes something as he's fifteen steps into walking out of her life.

she loves him.

/

she gets drunk right before his wedding. fake smiles and clove cigarettes are her best friend and lucy shakes her head at her sister and grabs her hand with a murmured promise that it would all be alright.

molly knows this is a lie.

/

two weeks later, the darkness has taken over and she, like her mum, self destructs to the point where she can't even look in the mirror because she's so full of hate and self loathing and pure misery.

she wants to go back, to change everything. to have never met him.

but mostly she just wants to have fought. she wants to have chased him.

but it's too late for their love and it's too late for her.

/

lucy finds her three hours too late.

there's an empty bottle of pills beside her and a note that reads "he's better off."

or maybe it says "we're better off"; lucy can't tell through her sobs.

/

teddy stands in the back row at her funeral, dressed head to toe in black. he keeps a poker face until everyone else has gone, lucy shooting him glares as she goes.

"i'm sorry," he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion as he stares down at the fresh dirt covering her grave. "i'm sorry," he says again, before turning to walk away.

/

victoire finds him two days later, an empty bottle of pills beside his head and a note that reads "you're better off," and really she's not shocked.

because sometimes certain people are just simply meant to be.


a/n: please no favourites/alerts without a review! (: