Author's Note: Hello all! It's been quite some time since I've actually written anything and for that I apologize. As I sat at my boyfriend's house and watched Jurassic Park (lovely movie!), I decided to update with a quick one shot. :) As well as having the mental image of Vergil in a top hat. :3

I got the title from the stellar song "Give Me Your Clothes, Your Boots, and Your Motorcycle" by Austrian Death Machine. Major kudos to those out there who understand the reference. ;D

Also, I would like to implore any of you Haunting Ground lovers out there to please go read CoyoteLongshot's stories:
Haunting Ground Revelations: Alea Iacta Est and Haunting Ground Revelations: Inter Spem et Metum.

They're absolutely wonderful; I wish Capcom would make those into actual games. lol :3

Anywho, without further ado, on with the story.


Give Me Your Clothes, Your Boots, and Motorcycle

"What are you supposed to be?" Dante prodded at Vergil's tuxedo vest.

"None of your concern," he brushed off Dante's hand and adjusted the brim of his top hat.

"Seriously, bro. Why are you all dolled up?" Dante batted his eyelashes, "got a fancy date?"

"As I told you, it's none of your concern," Vergil quirked an eyebrow, "why do you want to know at any rate?"

Dante snorted, "Couldn't care less, I just like bothering you."

Vergil sighed as he walked downstairs into the living room.

"You clean up pretty good, " Lady grinned.

Dante slid down the banister and landed with a thud in front of the demon huntress.

"What the hell are you wearing? Vergil is this some kind of joke? Please tell me this is a joke," Dante babbled while covering his eyes.

"Dante, this is a joke. Feel better?" Vergil walked over to Lady.

"I know you're lying, so no it doesn't make anything better," pouted Dante, still shielding his eyes.

Trish walked through the front door, shedding her jacket and placing it on the rack.

"What's wrong with him?" she gestured to the red clad twin, while taking a seat on the desk.

"I look like a girl," Lady waved a hand downward, showing Trish the form fitting green silk gown.

"She has been taken over by the pod people. I knew it was going to happen, why didn't I prepare?" Dante groaned.

He whipped around facing Trish, "Quick, I've got a flamethrower in the basement, I'll prevent them from leaving so we can take out the Lady look-a-like."

"But Dan-"

"There's no time, woman!"

"He's lost it," muttered Lady.

"He's never had anything to begin with," Vergil smirked as Dante shot him a glare.

"You ready to get out of here?" Lady offered her arm.


Trish leaped off the desk and bear hugged Dante so he couldn't move, "Bye! You two have fun."

Dante wriggled his arms trying to throw Trish off, "Unhand me! You're letting it get away. I swear to-"

Trish clamped a hand over his mouth and waved at the couple walking out the door, "They make such a cute couple."


Review! :)