Adam didn't see Jeff for three days after all that went down. He knew Jeff had his cell phone on him and he called and texted him about a million times. No answer was had though. On the first night, once it was realized that Jeff took off, stayed in constant contact with him as they tried to track him down. However, by the second night, they weren't answering his calls either. He had a feeling that Jeff had gotten a hold of him and had told them about what had happened. He couldn't confirm it of course, but the radio silence wasn't a good sign. He thought about going to Matt's house and seeing what was going on but he was too scared of how that would go. Jay went for him instead but found nobody at home when he did it. That worried him even more and he was such a wreck that Jay stayed with him all three days to try to keep him together. It was something Adam appreciated more than he could ever properly convey in words.
On the morning of the fourth day, Adam was woken up by the sound of something being knocked over downstairs. He sat straight up, looking over to see if Jay was still sleeping on the floor. He was still there, hugging his pillow and curled up in almost a fetal position. If they were both up there that meant there could only be one person downstairs. Swallowing hard, Adam threw off the covers and got out of bed. He smoothed down his hair and quickly threw on a fresh change of clothes. How he looked wasn't really important but fixing up his appearance was a way for him to stall. He knew he had to confront Jeff. He had wanted to get it over with. But that didn't stop him from being scared shitless to do it.
Once he looked semi presentable he took a deep breath and headed downstairs. Halfway down he could already see Jeff sitting on the couch in the living room. He had his hair pulled back, his elbows resting on his knees and his head bowed. He didn't even notice Adam until he stepped in through the doorway and cleared his throat. "Hey..." Adam felt totally lame for starting out that way but he didn't know what else to say.
"Hey..." Jeff's voice revealed it was just as awkward for him as it was for Adam.
Adam rubbed the back of his neck and walked more into the room, taking the seat that was right across from the couch. He almost sat down on the couch with Jeff but stopped himself. He figured he wasn't welcome on there. "I um...I guess we need to talk."
"Yeah." Jeff looked and sounded less than enthused about that statement. "We do."
That agreement was followed by a long, awkward silence. Adam opened his mouth several times, trying to figure out the best way to start. "I really am sorry," he finally said. "I know it's probably not worth much, but for what it is, I'm sorry."
Jeff nodded along, not looking very convinced. "You're right. It's not worth much right now." He pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a long, sad sigh. "I just...I don't even know what to do. I've spent the last few days trying to figure it out and I've got jack fucking shit." He ran a hand through his hair, resting it on the back of his neck as he chewed on his lower lip. "I just...I thought we were happy." He put his hand back down and let out a bitter laugh. "I really thought we were happy."
Adam looked down at the floor guiltily. "I wanted to be...I don't really know when things started to change." He felt horrible for saying this but he felt like he had to. Might as well get it all out there. "I love you. I do. I just...I don't know. I started feeling like I was...trapped."
"Well gee I'm sorry our life together was THAT bad." Jeff did not take that statement well at all, which was to be expected. How could anyone take that statement well?
"No that's not...that's not what I meant." Adam shook his head vehemently to try to keep Jeff from speaking. "I just...it's me. I know we had a good life. I did. I just..I don't say trapped to blame you. I just felt like the spark was gone in my life. Like everything was just going by and I wasn't living. The world was moving around me and I-"
"So what, Randy made you feel that way?" Jeff's voice was a mix of anger and bitterness. "Randy made you feel alive? Randy fucking Orton could give you something I couldn't?"
"...I thought so at the time," Adam admitted.
"Do you love him?"
"Are you sure? I mean, you say you love me yet you did this so clearly you don't know what you're doing."
Adam cringed and ran a hand over his face. "I was WRONG Jeff. I was. I should have never done what I did. You deserve better I was trying to be better. I stopped seeing him so we can be happy."
"How did you expect to be happy by doing that?" Jeff asked. "Nothing changed. I thought we were happy. You didn't even TALK to me! You went around my back to sleep with someone else and then you agreed to marry me! To marry me of all things!" What was that going to do? Were you just going to marry me even though you felt that way?"
"I couldn't tell you," Adam insisted. "It would have hurt you."
"Well I'm not feeling so great now, am I?" Jeff yelled. He jumped back up to his feet and started pacing around. "You don't think I would have ever caught on to how you felt? Maybe I am blind but I wouldn't have been for forever. You really think marrying me would have solved anything?"
"No..." Adam admitted. "I just thought it would be easier." He sighed and rubbed his temples. Another long, awkward silence followed, neither one of them knowing what to say or do. Adam was trying to wait and see if Jeff would break it but he showed no signs of doing so. "What um...what are we going to do?"
"I...I think you need to go." After a pause that was the answer Jeff gave him. "I can't be with you. Not now. Not...maybe not ever again. I don't know."
Adam swallowed hard but nodded in acceptance anyway. He deserved nothing less. "I'll uh, ask Jay if I can stay with him."
"Figured. I'll uh...I gotta go to Dad's for a bit. That should give you enough time to get your things."
"I don't know if I can find all of it..." It felt so weird saying these things. It hadn't truly sunk in that he was pretty much getting kicked out of his home. He knew he deserved it but it just hadn't all sunk in yet.
"I'll um...I'll get the rest out to you if I find it." Jeff shrugged and awkwardly put his hands in his pockets. "I um...yeah I really do gotta go." He didn't wait for Adam to say anything else. He just bailed, leaving Adam to sink down on his chair and bury his face in his hands. He didn't think he would ever forgive himself for making this mess. He really didn't.