Writer's Note: I present to you all the first chapter of Reading Rainbow! My lovely avengers crack fic. I worked hard on this and hope all you guys enjoy it. By the way italics are the story in the story parts
Warning: This fanfiction is a crack fic. Do not take anything seriously. Characters will act like over the top versions of themselves, trees will talk, and fury is a pretty ballerina in his free time. Its cracktasitic. Also there will be guys making out with each other so don't want to read that LEAVE NOW.
Disclaimer: I do not own the avengers..seeing what I do to these characters in this fic maybe that's a good thing.
Chapter One- And so the story begins..
As an avenger Tony Stark has come face to face with a lot of weirdness. In fact it probably said a lot about him that he didn't even flinch when he turned on the tv to the site of 'the cat in the hat' destroying New York. His only reaction was to raise one eye brow and wonder how Loki had come across the cat in the hat. Loki didn't really hit him as a guy who would read children's books but who was he to judge? So he put on his armour and flew off, with no idea that his day was about to get weirder.
"Iron man! You're here!" Peter cried out, as he swang around the cat in hat's legs, "About time to. We have our hands full here."
"I can see that.." Tony murmured, as he stared at the site before him. It seems during his flight over that the cat in the hat had been joined by some friends. The Berenstain bears were there as well, roaring and sending cars flying with their feet.
Steve, as well as the other avengers were focusing their actions on the family. Upon hearing Peter's voice calling out to Tony, Steve taped on his ear piece and spoke, "Iron man! Thank god..We are a little tied up taking care of the berenstain family..could you help Spiderman?"
Tony smiled at the sound of Steve's voice, "Of course Cap. So I'm guessing that this is all Loki's fault or do we have an crazed primary teacher on our hands?"
Steve snorted in humour, jumping out of the way of Brother's hand, "Well Thor says that he can't feel his brother at present So we can cross out Loki." If he was going to say anything about the primary teacher Tony would never know because it was then that Thor let loose a roar. Then a wave of lighting was send at Father bear. The battle continued for awhile, but eventually Spiderman and Tony took the cat in the hat down with Peter's webs(and a good shot of Tony's chest beam). The others had also taken down the bear family. (The hulk had helped a great deal with that as he had no problem attacking sister bear, when the others had froze.)
"Well that was fun, destroyed my childhood yes but fun." Peter piped up, as he looked up at the tied up children's characters. Steve looked around him as if he was waiting for something.
"What's up Cap?" Tony asked, as he laying next to his friend's side.
"Its just..that was a little too easy.." Steve turned to face him, "Iron man can you do a quick swipe of the surrounding area see if anyone strange is near by?"
"On it Cap." Tony took off and flew out over the surrounding area but saw nothing but empty abandon cars.
"It sure was lucky that those creatures decided to attack now..I mean there is basically no one in the main street at this hour!" Clint noted, he to was looking around and kept his bow upright as he waiting for the punch line. Nothing was this easy for the avengers. Their worries were right, of course, as the villain of the day was still there. He was hidden from site and sound. For he was not even human. No he was something else in tiredly, and the avengers were about to learn that he himself was not so easy to take down.
Suddenly there was a white light, and the sky its self was seemly ripping apart. The avengers could only ready themselves, as a voice seemed to come from the heaven's themselves.
"Greetings Avengers. I am the narrator and I welcome you all to take part in my story."
"What the hell?" Clint cried, as he was suddenly being pulled into the air. Natasha acted quickly and grasped at his legs as they flew past her only to lose her own ground.
"HULK quick grab them! Don't let them fly away!" Steve shouted, he need not to, as abound seeing Clint's flight he has rush over to him with a cry.
"You let go of cupid!" The hulk yelled as he jumped in the air; catching the flying Clint and Natasha in his arms.
"Now. Now. No fighting it. All of you will be pulled into the story." With that Clint, Natasha and the hulk went flying into the rip in the sky.
"NO! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO THEM?" Steve cried out angrily, glaring up at the sky. He got no answer, instead suddenly his legs left the ground.
"CAP!" Tony flew as fast as he could to Steve's side and took the man in his arms. This meant sadly that he wasn't there to stop either Peter or Thor from flying into the rip in the sky.
Tony didn't stop to think about them, he had to save Steve. He turned his back on the rip and tried flying away. The invisible grip of the rip was to strong on and was dragging him back.
"Now no need to worry. Just give up and join the story and enjoy the power of the word." The narrator said, as the pull from the rip suddenly grew tighter and Tony was sent flying.
"Damn it! Jarvis power up my foot blusters!" Tony shouted as he and Steve were brought closer to the rip.
"You had to fight it didn't you? I should have guessed.." The narrator sighed and suddenly Steve was ripped from Tony's arms.
"NO STEVE!" Tony cried out and reached out a armour hand to grasp at Steve's outreach hand. With a pop Steve was gone though the rip.
"STEVE!" Tony screamed and without thinking twice about it, went flying into the rip without a fight.
Blight light and then nothing.
Slowly Tony opened his eyes and found himself staring up at the bright blue sky. "Jarvis. Report." Jarvis did not answer him and after a couple seconds he knew why. His suit was gone. He sat up quicky and stared down at himself.
"What the hell? WHY AM I DRESSED LIKE SOME DISNEY CHARACTER? AND WHERE IS MY ARMOUR?"
"If I allowed you to keep your amour mister Iron man you would had a unfair advantage in the story, and we can't have that."
Tony glared to the side, where he believed the voice was coming from, "Who are you and what have you done to my teammates?"
"There is no need to worry my friend, they too are here in my story. If you wish you may look for them but I advise you to stay and play your part."
"My part! What the hell do you mean by that? If this is some kind of game I'm not going to play it." With that statement Tony stood and made to walk off only to be stopped by the narrator's next words.
"I would not do that if I were you. If you do not play your part in my story I will sadly have to punish the one you love."
"What did you just say?"
"I believe what I said was quite straight forward but at last I will explain, If you don't play my game Iron man and I use my story to kill one Captain America. Also before you open your mouth I know you love him. I'm the narrator and this is my story and I know all."
Tony glared, "Then you know that this will all end with you behind bars."
"Most likely yes but that does not mean I can't have fun first right?"
A anger fulled Tony's chest. This thing had treated to kill Steve, had taken his friends and was forcing them all to play his sick game. This was fun to him?
"Alright then. What actually is my part?"
"You will learn soon.."
Suddenly Tony was standing before a castle as a crowned man stood at his window looking down at the people below.
"Once upon a time there was a king and queen who wanted a child but could not have one. That was till one day when the queen had a daughter. There was a great celebration across the land, for the king and Queen had finally had a child. So the King called his people to the castle to introduce the child.."
Tony blinked, "What.."
The king smiled down at his people from his castle window, "Greetings my people! After so long me and my wife have had a child. So rejoice my people! We have a princees!" He took a step back taking a child from an unknown person's arms. "I present to you all my daughter! PRINCESS THOR!"
"YOU GOT TO BE SHITTING ME!" Tony shouted, just as the crowd cheered, as the King turned the child to face them. The 'child' had blond hair, blue eyes and was holding a small hammer.
"And so a party was throw together to celebrate this great event..everyone was happy for the birth of Princess Thor..all but one."
It was then, as he found himself dress in red cloth and holding a wand, did Tony realized that as a avenger he had not faced all the weirdest things. This was the weirdest.
"I'm a fairy and Thor is a Princess. Yeah that sounds weird to even say out loud."
"Now Mister Iron man. I think you make a great fairy. Have you guessed what this part of my story is?"
If looks could kill the narrator would be dead five times over.
"This my friend is the story of Sleeping Beauty! Now then I leave you to your part.."
"And so the story begins.."
End Chapter One.