Hey guys, this is my first ever fanfic, so please be kind with criticism. Please review, and I hope you guys enjoy it.
BTW Song is 'Never Again' by Nickelback.
He's drunk again, it's time to fight
She must have done something wrong tonight
The living room becomes a boxing ring
It's time to run when you see him clenching his hands
She's just a woman, never again
Seen it before but not like this
Been there before but not like this
Never before have I ever seen it this bad
She's just a woman, never again
I lay on my bed, curled up in a ball. As I weep, I rub my hand back and forth across my bruised abdomen, trying to bring some relief from the searing pain he has inflicted upon my body.
The room is cold; the bare walls silent spectators of my grief. The whole place feels empty and neglected.
Or is it just me?
I only sleep here on the nights he banishes me from our bedroom. Tonight, however, is different.
I walked out on him.
'Walked' isn't exactly the correct term. 'Crawled' maybe. 'Dragged' would be more appropriate. I dragged myself out of the room, and for once, despite his intense, lingering gaze, I didn't look back.
Once I reached the lonely solitude of the spare room, however, my resolve cracked. I fell onto the bed, and cried my very heart out.
So here I am.
This was it. I make the decision.
Once I can move again, I'm leaving. For good. Never to return. I don't need this.
I don't deserve this.
I hate him. So much that it actually scares me.
The soft squeak of my bedroom door draws me from my private thoughts. My hand freezes over my stomach.
For at time, we just stay there. Him standing in the doorway, me frozen on the bed. Although I can't see him, I can feel his dark eyes burning holes in my back. My body screams in pain, and I bite my lip. I taste blood.
But I don't move. Not even to wipe away the blood. I won't give him the satisfaction of seeing how much he's hurt me.
I hear his quiet footsteps across the floor. Fear rises in my throat. I screw my eyes up tight and try to make myself as small as possible, waiting for the first blow to land upon my bruised skin.
It never comes.
Instead, I feel the mattress dip as he sits beside me. For a long time, neither of us move.
Suddenly, I feel his hand on my stomach. He gently rubs back and forth, providing a little relief from the pain.
The pain he inflicted.
Violently, I push his hand away. I hold my breath, waiting for retribution. When it doesn't come, I let out a deep breath.
"Leave me alone," I hiss. I expect some sort of reaction, but all I am met with is a sigh. It is the saddest sound I have ever heard. I feel rather than see him lean over me. Instinctively, I draw away in fear.
I swear I feel him flinch. Almost.
Gently, he places a kiss on the top of my head. I feel the mattress even out as he stood.
Still facing the wall, I hear his footsteps retreat across the room. They stop, and I know he's standing in the doorway, watching me once again.
"I'm sorry..." His voice, absent of its usual clown like quality, barely brushes upon a whisper. But I hear him.
I shoot up, ignoring the agonizing pain in every part of my body. I stare with wide eyes at the place where he had stood moments earlier. He said he was sorry.
He has never, ever apologized. Never.
Not to me.
I raise a shaking hand to the place where he kissed me. I can still feel his lips, like burning silk as they brush across my skin.
He said he was sorry. That meant...
Somewhere, inside his twisted, complicated being... he cared.
I hate him. So much that it scares me.
I love him. So much that it terrifies me.