A/N: Well... Hints of seballen I guess...? Um... I used the manga for the discussions. Slightly altered to fit Creepyish!Allen. Allen is OOC in this, and on purpose. Please tell me if the rating or genre is incorrect. T.T
Warning: Seballen awesomeness~!
The five noblemen (And woman) stepped into the dark shop, home of the Undertaker. Inside, Ciel and Sebastian had expected the Undertaker to be there, but instead, they found a boy. The boy was busy sleeping on an empty coffin next to the far wall. Ciel decided to leave the boy alone. After all, he might be as strange as the Undertaker.
"Are you there, Undertaker?" Ciel called as he looked around the room. Suddenly, a mysterious voice echoed (?) around the room.
"... hi hi... I knew... You would come..." It said. A coffin that was leaning on the wall slowly opened. "Wel~come, Earl... Do you want to see how it feels to sleep in my custom-made coffin...?" There the Undertaker was. He was a creepy man, with long gray hair, but not from old age. His hair had a few braids throughout, which is worn so as to hide his eyes. He has a noticeable scar across his face, neck, and left pinky finger, and has long black fingernails (No more describing now).
"I didn't come here to play," Ciel growled. The Undertaker placed a finger on Ciel's lips.
"You don't need to tell me. I know why you came. With just one look~ I can tell what's on your mind," Undertaker said mysteriously, "since the earl went out of his way to visit me, I'll certainly do everything I can to help."
"You know something?" Ciel asked the rather creepy man.
"Please, take a seat first, I'll go make tea." Undertaker chuckled.
"Sit where-?" Everbody asked but was cut off by the now awake boy.
"Why not sit on top?" The boy that was earlier asleep offered. One they got a good look at him, they saw that he, sort-of like the Undertaker, had white hair. On the left side of his face was an ugly (To me it isn't) scar, and they noticed that his eyes were a bright silver. The boy turned to the Undertaker and smiled. "Why don't I make the tea; I don't mind." he politely offered.
"Oh little, innocent Allen! So kind of you to do free labor for an undertaker like me~!" Undertaker exagerated, causing the boy, whom's name is Allen, to chuckle.
"Now then, you want to know about Jack the Ripper? Everyone's been scared because of this disturbance... But this isn't the first time I've handled this kind of thing," Undertaker munched on a bone shaped cookie.
"!" were the noblemen's (and woman's) reaction.
"This isn't the first time? What do you mean?" Madame Red gulped.
"It's happened before, a case where prostitutes were killed," Allen smiled as he swiftly munched on a cookie, before taking a swig of his black tea.
The Undertaker picked up the jar and held it towards the young earl. "What some?" He asked him.
"Don't want any..." Ciel sweat dropped.
"In fact, the way they were killed was very similar too," Allen added thoughtfully.
"But in the beginning, the police didn't think much of these cases. Though the murdered prostitutes all had something in common," Undertaker chuckled and Allen laughed too.
"Something in common?" Ciel trailed off.
"... What is it?" Sebastian asked.
"Well now, I wonder what, I wonder what it is indeed. Is it bothering you?" Undertaker closed the lid of the cookie jar and handed it to Allen, who promptly opened it and dove into the bone shaped cookies.
"I see, so that's how it is. You're very good at doing business, Undertaker. How much money do you want for this information?" Lau smirked.
"How much money? I don't want any of the queen's money!" Undertaker closed up on Lau before turning to Ciel, "now then earl... haa haa... I only have one requirement... Show me a 'first rate laugh.' If you do, no matter what you want to know, I'll tell you...!"
Allen rolled his eyes but on his face was a smile. Undertaker collapsed onto the table, muttering 'haa haa... Isn't it great?'
"Weirdo," Ciel muttered quietly to Sebastian, whom's eyes were stuck on Allen's cute face.
"Fu... Earl, if that's the case, let me handle this," Lau stepped up. "The sleeping tiger of the Shanghai New Year's party, also referred to as my soul, this should satisfy you! Do you like it?" he finished and was quiet surprised when nobody was laughing.
"It looks like he still won't talk, Lau... It can't be helped," Madame Red stepped up. "Then I, Madame Red, a beauty of high society, shall make my appearance now. If I ask him, he'll be sure to tell us!"
She cleared her throat. "So- because ###### turns into ***! So *** Will also ***! But- ****- ######- ****- #####-" It was so dirty, Sebastian covered Ciel's ears and Undertaker covered Allen's. About an hour later, she was 'X'ed out.
"You're the only one left, Earl," Allen chuckled.
"Bu-" Madame Red and Lau started but paused.
"I've helped you many times in the past... Can't you be nice to me just this once?" Undertaker pouted.
"Damn..." Ciel murmured. Sebastian stepped up. "Sebastian?"
"It can't be helped," the butler sighed.
"Oh... It's the butler's turn now?" Allen smiled cheerfully.
"Everyone, please step outside for a moment," Sebastian pulled on his gloves.
"Se... Sebastian..." stuttered Ciel.
"You absolutely must not peek inside..." Sebastian sparkled.
They stood in silence until-
"Ahhahahaha!" A pair of loud laughing came out of the shop. The door opened and there stood a smiling Sebastian.
"Please come back in. Let's continue our discussion," he bowed.
On a coffin layed Undertaker, who was drooling and in La La Land. On another coffin, Allen was still chuckling lightly.
"Th-that was classic!" he gasped out before temperarily passing out.
"Come... Continue... I have seen my heart's desire..." drooled Undertaker, whom had just came out of La La Land. "Whatever you want to know is fine... Actually... I've always thought, that there weren't enough... 'Guests.' Gu fu~." he had returned to normal by now and Allen was coming back to the living.
"Not enough?" Sebastian questioned.
"Yes, not enough..." Allen groaned as he sat up.
"Internal organs, of course," they (Undertaker and Allen) said in unison.
"!" Was their response. Allen groggly stood up and walked into the kitchen (Is there a kitchen?) and came back a minute later with a tea cup.
"Don't you think that the eternally sleeping 'guests' that lay in the coffins are so cute?" the Undertaker asked as he picked up a human model.
"Of course!" Allen smirked into his cup of tea.
"My- our- hobby is to take out organs for research," Undertaker petted the model. Lau and Madame Red were holding measuring cups with a grim/disgusted look.
"This could have stored a kidney before, right?" Lau asked, hiding his mouth with his over sized sleeve. "A criminal could've given it to a loan shark..."
"It also could've come from the slums of China. That prostitute isn't a whole woman anymore," Undertaker chuckled as Lau bristled angrily. "because her womb, is gone. Recently, these kind of 'guests' have been rapidly increasing. Their whole bodies dripping with blood, it's made us very busy."
"Let's just say that there aren't very many people out on the streets at night, but accurately cutting out specific organs couldn't be done by a regular person, right?" Sebastian offered.
"The butler understands well, I too feel this way," Undertaker did a cheshire grin and Allen giggled.
"If he had to act within such a short time, he should slit the troat first," Allen grinned darkly as Undertaker demostrated as he (Allen) talked. "And proceed to cut the stomach. It's easier to succeed this way," he hummed. Undertaker took that as his cue to begin talking.
"From the looks of the culprit's work, that cruel accuracy definitely wasn't carried out by a normal citizen. It had to have been someone experienced. You should've been able to figure that out too, earl," he chuckled, "it's very likely that the murderer is an expert. Maybe if he knew you were here, it could lure him out. He will keep committing crimes, he definitely will, unless somebody stops him."
"Can you stop him? 'The notorious noble'- Ciel Phantomhive?" Allen smirked before setting his tea down. He looked over everybody, his gaze lingering on Sebastian.
"The world of darkness has the world of darkness's rules. He wouldn't murder random people for no reason. There must be an influence manipulation him from behind," Ciel mused as Sebastian helped put his coat on. "I won't be scared, no matter what tricks the queen's lackeys want to use, I will solve them all. Sorry for intruding, Undertaker. Allen." He proceeded to leave the shop.
"Wait earl. Take Allen," Undertaker chuckled as he pushed the teen toward the noblemen.
They all climbed into the carriage stiffly.
"What do you think after hearing that?" Ciel asked the others.
"I've been thinking...The murderer should be 'anatomical expert,' but also know where the police are when they commit the crime. The culprit could be taking away the organs for some kind of ceremony or because they're with a 'Black Magic Cult,'" Sebastian shifted. Allen had taken the liberty of seating himself in the butler's lap.
"Then right now... Where do we start from?" Madame Red asked Sebastian, and trying in the best of her abilities to ignore the white haired teen nuzzle the demon's neck. "It's 'the season' right now, there's so many people gathered at the capital! Not only are London doctors suspects, there's also the head physicians that aristocrats from all over could have brought. And not just doctors, students of medical schools could also be the culprit. Like Lau, there are many foreigners that brought weapons."
"You guys are different from the noblemen I'm used to~" Allen interrupted/stated and looked up at Sebastian before turning to Madame Red.
"Hmm...? How so?" Lau questioned.
"Well, the ones I'm used to are the ones that make fun of and beat up poor abandoned children who have to work in the circus for years before finally leaving with a vagabond clown who named me. Then said clown dies, causing me to cry at his grave for hours before that damn Alcoholic comes along and takes me with him, saying he's training me, but was actually using me to pay for debts he creates! Then, finally one day I manage to leave him, but I'm still getting hunted by loan sharks and having to pay the debts!" Allen ranted before calming down.
"... But if we wait a week, 'the season's' events will be over and many doctors will go home," Madame Red quietly finished, eyeing Allen nervously.
"We'll wait until then to investigate," Sebastian smirked down at Allen, as if the rant had never happened.
"Why...?" Lau asked.
"There's no way we can investigate clearly during 'the season,'" Sebastian explained.
"Let's just say we can't investigate clearly... Shouldn't we at least be able to complie a report on the suspects!" Madame Red yelled.
"Please wait a moment. As the earl of Phantomhive's butler, how can I not be able to accomplish such a small matter?" Sebastian stood up, causing Allen to casually wrap his arms around the butler's neck. Sebastian smirked and picked him up bridle style.
"Then, I'll immediately go investigate, and quickly research all the suspects' reports," Sebastian bowed.
"Wait..." Madame Red trailed off as she stared in shock at Sebastian, whom was opening the carriage door, still holding Allen.
"Wa!" Grell gaped in shock at the butler. Sebastian smiled at Grell.
"Grell, is it? Please drive the horse carriage back safely," Sebastian said pleasantly.
"Eh? Ah, yes!" Grell gasped out as Sebastian ducked back into the carriage.
"Then, please excuse me if I leave now," Sebastian smiled while Ciel shooed him.
Said butler immediately jumped out of the speeding carriage and disappeared.
"Wait a minute! Isn't this horse carriage still running?" Madame Red screeched.
"He... He's gone..." Madame Red and Lau trailed off.
"So...~ Mr. Demon~" drawled Allen. Sebastian merely smirked and before leaning down and capturing Allen's lips.
"Now, the report," Sebastian murmured.
"Just wait until we're done~" giggled Allen.
A/N: Um... Allen's... On crack?