Within the view of the Kaleidoscope, contained within the core of the root, there are many fantastic tales, great feats performed by small men, fantastic deeds carried out by powerful mages and brave knights, and unspeakable horrors unleashed in the dark hours ruled by those not human.

There are also many stupid stories.

This is one of those stories.

The Year 2020 of the Common Era, A Bus Stop in Tokyo

Two men stepped off of of a bus into the streets of the Japanese capital, a city ever consumed by the hustle and bustle even at this hour of night. One was a giant of a man, apparently somewhere in his 30s or 40s, though at a glance one could be assured he was the sort who never looked older no matter how many years passed (one probably wouldn't be aware however, that this was the literal case). The red-haired giant wore a truly absurd fur cape over a shockingly normal outfit consisting of a t-shirt and jeans, which just made the cape stand out even more. His companion on the other hand was a much smaller man, though still a bit tall compared to your average Japanese citizen. This man had the look of someone who was eternally sour, his long black hair slightly covering a face that had been aged a bit faster than usual through a combination of weariness, anger, and exhaustion.

The cheerful giant stretched his muscles as he began walking down the street in search of a place to eat. Turning to his companion, he began to speak, "Another long journey complete, another story added to our names, and yet you still wearthat look. Why is it, my friend, that you seek to simply suck the very air itself of its energy and good cheer?"

The smaller man sighed, a familiar action for him, "First of all, a bus ride does not count as a story added to our names. In fact, in 25 years we've yet to add anythingto our names. Everything is either so ridiculous that nobody believes us, such as how we won that stupid war back then-"

"-andstopped that evil thing at the end from emerging. You always leave out the best part!"

"That's because it's the most ridiculous part, even considering who you are and the help we got. Anyway, everything's either something as insane as that, or too mundane for anyone to care about."

"What about the time I fought the White Princess of the Vampires? Truly, she was an opponent greater even than the Golden King!" The giant stopped in front of a host club, considering that the best thing to go with a fine drink after a long journey would be fine company to drink it with (besides his sour friend).

"Fought? Fought?" The smaller man's eyes took on a somewhat manic quality. "You had a drinking contest with her! A contest you lost. And you didn't fight that annoying gold guy either, the black one took him out!"

"See that's your problem my friend, you're always concerned with the details. You need to think big picture!" The giant strolled inside the club, not bothering to consult his companion. Not that he needed to, the other would follow just as he had for 2 1/2 decades.

As the two men continued their back and forth, the manager of the club took note of them entering and shouted at one of the employees. "Hey Kagari, we've got two coming in the front. And they're gentlemencallers."

The employee in question sighed and then put on his professional smile. And I was nearly done with my shift too. Ah well, just get through this and I can go on patrol. Won't be that hard. After all, they're just a pair of gay dudes out for a drink and some looks.

...Why the hell am I sweating so much?


Just a quick and dirty snip to get the ball rolling.

You can see the rest on SpaceBattles or Beast's Lair, same with Witch's Tale of the 4th Holy Grail war.