"One more beer," the boss decided, cracking open another can and falling into the cozy faux-fur chair, speckled with leopard spots. The ice-cold drink slid down her throat, quenching a raging thirst.
The lightly tanned woman wore a slinky pink chemise and fluffy bunny slippers, raven hair cascading around her slender shoulders. Her large eyes were fixed on the glowing screen in front of her, perfectly-manicured fingers curled around the sleek white mouse. "Okay, let's see what's up."
She logged onto the Internet and into the secure area set up by Kinzie for 'secret meetings on the web'.
[YOU HAVE LOGGED ONTO SAINTLY: THE CHATROOM]
The boss didn't understand how it worked, but all the Saints had accounts and were reachable in once place, and she was happy that she didn't have to fiddle with her stupid phone for longer than necessary. She'd even let Kinzie pick everyone's screen names, with the exception of an adamant Pierce and a moody Shaundi. Anything to make life easier, she shrugged.
Nobody online! The boss growled in frustration. She had taken a Saturday night off from the usual revelry to arrange a serious conversation with her crew about the new deal withSaints Flow, and nobody showed up. Typical.
[T_Cup has SIGNED IN]
The boss sighed. Some company was better than no company.
FollowTheLeader: Yo Kinz. Nice to see ya made it.
T_Cup: Are we alone?
T_Cup: I'm not even surprised.
FollowTheLeader: Me neither. It sucks, cuz it's Pierce I really need to talk to about this shit. He knows Saints Flow better than any one of us.
I invited the rest of you along for the hell of it, she thought. It could have been a party!
T_Cup: He knows what's in it?
FollowTheLeader: Yup. Even I don't know that, and I don't wanna know.
T_Cup: Do you need me or can I go?
FollowTheLeader: Can't we just have a normal conversation?
FollowTheLeader: Have you got a plan for the Deckers yet?
T_Cup: It's been three weeks since you got me. It takes longer than that to destroy an ENTIRE GANG.
FollowTheLeader: There's no need to shout.
The conversation evaporated. Luckily, the boss had a plan. Grinning mischievously, she typed a message guaranteed to start up a chat.
FollowTheLeader: So…I hear you've got a thing for Oleg?
T_Cup: Stop it.
FollowTheLeader: Awww, you totally do!
FollowTheLeader: I didn't know you liked your guys so…big! ;)
FollowTheLeader: And muscular.
FollowTheLeader: And hot.
FollowTheLeader: Hmm. I might have to set you two up.
T_Cup: Seriously? Let it go.
FollowTheLeader: Hey, just looking out for my girl.
FollowTheLeader: He's too Russian for ya, don't you think?
FollowTheLeader: I'm kidding, Kinz.
Maybe she had teased the paranoid agoraphobic a touch too much? She chuckled. Kinzie was adorable, and if it were Oleg she wanted, it would be Oleg she got.
T_Cup: Can we talk about something else?
FollowTheLeader: Sure. But if it's not Oleg you're into, is it that punk kid, Matt? :)
She knew she was being absurd, but the ridiculous tended get the best reaction from the highly-strung ginger girl.
FollowTheLeader: He's young, but if you like that sorta thing…
FollowTheLeader: And I'm sure he'd have some electronic toys too, if you know what I mean ;)
T_Cup: That's so creepy.
T_Cup: Also, here's something you need to see.
[T_Cup wants to share the image file: CHECK_THIS_SAINTS_FLOW_ADZ]
FollowTheLeader: What is it?
T_Cup: Promo pics.
FollowTheLeader: Where did you get them?
FollowTheLeader: Never mind.
[FollowTheLeader accepted image file: CHECK_THIS_SAINTS_FLOW_ADZ]
As the image loaded up, a spray of beer left the boss' mouth, shiny golden droplets hitting the metal desk. She turned away; she was sure it was an obscure hallucination. Gulping down the rest of her drink, she looked back, her jaw dropping. It was not a vision. What the hell am I looking at?
FollowTheLeader: The fuck did you just send me?
FollowTheLeader: Is that…
FollowTheLeader: Is that a dick?
T_Cup: It shut you up, didn't it?
T_Cup: It's Angel's… ;) Pierce told me you like him.
T_Cup: A lot.
FollowTheLeader: …Honestly, I wouldn't mind, but this dick is black. So it ain't Angel.
FollowTheLeader: And how the fuck did you get the picture?
T_Cup: It's a trade secret.
T_Cup: Oops, wrong file! That's probably Zimos' package ;D
FollowTheLeader: Too much fucking info…
FollowTheLeader: I think I need a memory wipe :S
T_Cup: Not even sorry.
FollowTheLeader: Just trying to forget it…
FollowTheLeader: Who the fuck keeps pictures of dicks on their computer?
T_Cup: *points to self*
T_Cup: Why do you think?
FollowTheLeader: Wow. Just wow.
FollowTheLeader: So if you're not into Oleg much (haven't given up on that yet) and definitely not Matt, who is it? ;)
FollowTheLeader: C'mon, you can tell me.
T_Cup: It's you.
The boss dropped the beer, the can clattering to the floor and remaining contents miraculously not spilling out: the cream shag-rug was saved. She stretched an arm to the floor and picked it up, eyes locked onto the screen the whole time. The fuck…?
FollowTheLeader: Uh, Kinz? We still on the same page here?
T_Cup: It's always been you, boss. I…I love you with all my *heart*
T_Cup: I've wanted to do things to you boss…filthy, filthy things to you, since the moment we first met.
FollowTheLeader: … I don't know what to say.
T_Cup: Say you'll be with me. We can do all sorts of naughty things together ;)
T_Cup: I'd even take you to Safeword. They like it when I bring someone with me.
FollowTheLeader: I'm flattered, I really am, but… I don't play for that team; know what I'm saying?
T_Cup: If you're not into kinky, we could try it gentle…but I like it rough ;)
FollowTheLeader: Sorry Kinz, but I'm not a muff muncher. Got nothing against chicks that like other chicks, but I'm not one of them.
T_Cup: …Aren't you even slightly bi?
FollowTheLeader: Sorry girl, Team Cock all the way.
FollowTheLeader: At least for now.
[T_Cup has SIGNED OUT]
Shit, I've hurt her feelings! The boss felt bad that she had to turn Kinzie down. She had been taken off guard, and besides, she simply didn't roll that way. Perhaps she could put a smile on the girl's face by setting her up with some other chick. I wonder if Shaundi's into pussy on the side? she thought, heading to the bar to mix up a Martini.
Upon her return, she spotted a flashing notifier.
[T_Cup has SIGNED IN]
T_Cup: Stop appearing offline, boss.
T_Cup: I know you're there.
T_Cup: Saints Flow isn't going to sell itself.
T_Cup: Where's everyone else?
The boss hurriedly replied.
FollowTheLeader: Went to get a drink. You okay?
T_Cup: Why wouldn't I be?
FollowTheLeader: It's not you; I'm just not into girls.
T_Cup: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Denial didn't seem like the Kinzie she knew. Something was wrong.
T_Cup: Saints Flow? That's the reason we're here, right?
FollowTheLeader: Kinz, I told you I need Pierce for that. Were you even listening?
T_Cup: Excuse me for not knowing something YOU DIDN'T TELL ME.
FollowTheLeader: Check back; I told ya twenty minutes ago.
T_Cup: I've only been online for five minutes.
T_Cup: Oh, shit! Wait here.
Where else am I gonna go? The boss shook her head. What the hell was going on? Did Kinzie's server fuck up and delete her memory?
FollowTheLeader: Is everything okay?
T_Cup: FUCK. That little bastard-
[T_Cup has SIGNED OUT]
[T_Cup has SIGNED IN]
T_Cup: That bastard Matt got into my account. Please ignore the crap he sent you.
FollowTheLeader: That shit about you being in love with me-
T_Cup: All Matt's doing. Fuck fuck fuck.
T_Cup: I'm so embarrassed.
FollowTheLeader: He's probably goin' at it to the picture of you and me making out or something.
T_Cup: Gross. Not helping.
FollowTheLeader: Matt doesn't turn you on, so by process of elimination you have a thing for Oleg?
T_Cup: Not now.
FollowTheLeader: Why not? It's cute! ;)
T_Cup: Please stop talking.
FollowTheLeader: Unless it's actually Matt?
T_Cup: Even he said it – way too creepy.
T_Cup: If it'll shut you up, Oleg is good looking. Sorta.
FollowTheLeader: Ha! I knew it!
FollowTheLeader: You guys need to go out once this Syndicate shit is over.
T_Cup: We'll see.
[Cyber_God has JOINED YOUR CHAT]
Cyber_God: U P4TH3T1C P30N5 H4V3 B33N H4CK3D!
T_Cup: I swear I'm going to-
Cyber_God: CH33R5! :)
FollowTheLeader: What do you want? Your pranks are wasting my time.
FollowTheLeader: Also, type in fucking English.
T_Cup: And if you need to jack off, go watch some fucking porn.
Cyber_God: You may think my attempts at sabotage are worthless, but do not flatter yourselves at the thought of me getting off to you old crones.
FollowTheLeader: Old? Fuck no. He didn't just call us old.
T_Cup: The little-
FollowTheLeader: And doesn't it say something that you have pics of dicks on your computer? *raises eyebrows*
Cyber_God: I assure you, all those images were on Agent Kensington's hard drive – I simply used them to my advantage.
T_Cup: You went through my drive? :O
T_Cup: What did you find?
FollowTheLeader: I don't even wanna know what else you got, Kinzie.
T_Cup: Wait… this isn't Matt! His online handle is R4gn0r0k!
Cyber_God: Silly tart! You thought I would use my actual ID to hack the Saints? That's for the real battles.
FollowTheLeader: Keep your shit to yourself and tell us what you're doing here.
Cyber_God: This chat has allowed me access to Agent Kensington's account and therefore leading me straight to her-
[Cyber_God was KICKED OUT by T_Cup]
FollowTheLeader: What the fuck did you do that for? He was gonna to tell us his plan!
T_Cup: One more minute and he would have had access to my laptop.
T_Cup: I did what I had to do.
FollowTheLeader: Ehhh… What now?
T_Cup: Can I leave?
[Cyber_God has RE-JOINED YOUR CHAT]
T_Cup: I've blocked all incoming signals.
T_Cup: The Deckers can't hack my computer.
FollowTheLeader: Fine, let me hear him out this time.
Cyber_God: Your attempts at resistance are futile.
FollowTheLeader: Get to the point, Miller.
Cyber_God: I have a message from Killbane: Stay away from the Syndicate. Steelport belongs to us.
The notorious woman rolled her green, cat-like eyes again. This kid needed to get a life; so many better ways of sending messages were out there, and among her favourites was gunfire. That always left an impression, be it on the person's mind or their body.
FollowTheLeader: All this shit for that?
T_Cup: You hacked my account to pass on a message? Why you-
Cyber_God: Not forgetting to have fun at your expense.
FollowTheLeader: If that's all, we'll being kicking you out now.
Cyber_God: It was Killbane's idea. I suggested a Trojan, but he wanted to send his warning.
FollowTheLeader: Are you done?
Cyber_God: I assure you, keep interfering with the city and there will be plenty more coming your-
[Cyber_God was KICKED OUT by FollowTheLeader]
FollowTheLeader: He was pissing me off.
T_Cup: Now you know how I always feel.
T_Cup: Around everyone.
FollowTheLeader: Everyone but a certain Russian?
T_Cup: We already discussed this.
FollowTheLeader: I'm wondering…
FollowTheLeader: Do you have a picture of Oleg's dick on your hard drive or is too big for your screen?
T_Cup: You did not just ask that-
FollowTheLeader: So you do have a pic? :D
T_Cup: I don't have to deal with this!
[T_Cup has SIGNED OUT]
The boss chuckled to herself; half-heartedly glad that nobody else had shown. Bonding with Kinzie was always an experience. She was used to the ex-FBI agent's strangeness, usually accompanied by a flurry of words she didn't understand and that caused her to become bored and disinterested in talking with Kinzie. Tonight, however, had proved surprisingly entertaining.
She typed one final message for the next time Kinzie signed in, yawned and slipped between the covers of her silk sheets, drifting off into a light slumber in minutes. Beside the sleeping silhouette, the computer blinked a dusky blue for the final time that night before shutting down.
FollowTheLeader: I'll take that as a yes ;)