AN: I know, I know. I start a lot of stories and I don't keep up with them, but this week is SPRING BREAK! And I plan on updating most of my recent stories and even bringing in a few new ones. So much inspiration, so little time to write.
His feet tapped impatiently against the floor of his old, Ford F-150 in a fast manner, shaking the entire truck along with every molecule in his body. His hands rested on his lap, with his fingertips pressing up against the low lying steering wheel. The glowing cell phone that resided in his other hand still showed no sign of a reply to anything he had sent the girl in the last hour. He tapped the bottom of the phone against the top of the wheel, waiting for that clock to change from nine seventeen to nine nineteen. That was a safe amount of time between calls, right?
This was his seventeenth phone call, not including any texting or using The Slap over his phone, to attempt to get her attention. He took a deep breath before dialing her number, once again. Thankfully, her soft voice came over the speaker, "Could you be any more impatient?"
"Finally..." he said with a sigh. "I thought I was supposed to be here at nine?"
"You were, but my parents just left, sorry. Do you want me to come out or...?"
"Yeah. Come here. I can't stay much longer," he said as he turned the ignition back, letting just the battery turn on. The digital clock was glowing a red, nine twenty. He promised Jade they would talk at ten. "I just want to see you before I do this."
"I'll be out in a second," the girl said as she ended the call. He sighed deeply as he shoved his phone into his pocket. His hand went to his chin as he rested against his door, his eyes fixated on his rear view mirror as he saw the light of the front door opening and closing. The brunette was walking quickly towards the vehicle, her arms covering her chest as the cold night air flowed across her skin.
He reached across the bench seat and pulled the door handle to get the door open for her. She got in the passenger's seat and immediately faced him, "how are you?"
"Wow. Not even a hug..." he said with a huff. She took it as a mocking comment instead of a serious thought, which is what he intended.
"Sorry..." she said. She scooted over to the middle spot, letting his arms wrap around her as she buried her face in the crook of his neck. She held onto his sides for a moment before pulling back. She kissed his cheek for added effect. "Now, how are you?"
"Better now that you're here. I'm freaking out about this," he said, running a hand through his dark hair, scratching his scalp before letting his head fall back against the window. Another sigh escaped his lips as his phone vibrated in his pocket. Without looking, he fished out his phone and checked out the text message: come over now. He ignored the phone and showed her the message. "She has to know."
"How could she know?"
"She has to know. She's Jade."
"And you're Beck, and I'm Tori. Your point is?" Tori asked as she stuck her neck out with a tilted glance.
"She's got a sixth sense about these things. I have to be honest. Half of the things she freaks out about are true. Like, Alyssa Vaughn, for example. She and I were messing around after our class together. It was awesome," Beck said with a slight smirk. Then, Tori's hand landed as a slap against his chest. He laughed a little as he grabbed onto her wrist. He forced the pretty brunette to look him in the eye. "Ms. Vega. Are you jealous?"
"Puh-lease," Tori said with a laugh. "It's not like I don't already have you."
"Technically...." Beck said, sounding out the word with a smile. He wanted to press her buttons a little more. "I'm still with Jade."
"But that's going to last what, another two hours?" Tori asked in a lower voice. Beck could always tell when she was trying to be a little seductive by how her tone got a heavy feel to it, like she wanted him to grab at her words. Her vision switched from his eyes to his lips; this time he was right about the voice. She began to lean in, tilted her head a little to the left before smirking. She didn't wait for him to get to her, she took the initiative and pressed her lips against his.
He felt a little guilty. The thought of his girlfriend flashed through the back of his mind. It made him hesitate, but it really didn't mean much when the girl pressed harder against his sensitive, wanting lips. It was enough to make him forget about... who was he talking about?
He fought back, pressing her back as his hand cupped her cheek. As he bit her bottom lip, she pulled away with a sigh. "What?"
"I don't like when you do that," Tori said, placing her fingertips against her lips. She rubbed them together as if to check the surface for a cut. He didn't even bite that hard.
"Sorry, I'm still getting used to this," Beck said, scratching the back of his head as his confidence stopped once more. He felt a pang of something in his chest.
"But you'll be happier with me," Tori said, looking at him with a kiss to his cheek.
He looked at her, "of course I will be. You don't hate me."
"Don't. Not now. I don't want to think about Jade right now," Beck said as his eyes shifted from her brown ones to the numbers on his clock. Nine thirty-five, and it took him at least seven minutes to get there. Jade hated when he was late, and this could be his last chance to make her happy... or at least try. It was hard to succeed at something that never happens.
He felt his guilt go away when he let his thoughts wander to his relationship for the past three weeks. The anger, the fighting, the annoying comments. He was so tired of doing nothing right. With Tori, he felt like he used to. Like he was worth something, instead of constantly messing up and second guessing himself.
"I just want to think about you," he finished, kissing her on the cheek. "But I gotta go."
"Already?" Tori spoke with a whine and a pout. He looked at her slightly puckered lips and sighed, kissing her gently upon the nose before moving down to her lips. Her mouth moved with his own as he made their lips part, leaving enough space for him to kiss her deeper. Their game of domination was drawn to a close when Beck's phone played an all too familiar tune.
We made love tonight as a result of a fight, and when you put your arms around me, the whole world's alright and a day's worth of bitchin' goes down the drain, when you lay in my bed and pick my brain.
He pressed the accept button, shooting Tori a look along with an index finger to his lips. She rolled her eyes and scooted slightly away from him. Beck rose an eyebrow at her when her thin arms crossed over her chest. He wanted to sigh, but once he pressed the green button, he knew that the wrong move would cost him a testicle or two.
"Are you on your way yet?" Was the first thing that greeted him from Jade's end of the line.
"Not yet. I'm heading out right now," he said. His fingers absentmindedly tapped along his leg, and Tori just stared at him, making the conversation all the more uncomfortable.
"Okay. Thanks..." she said quietly into the speaker. Her voice was faltering.
Not now. Not now. Not now. It was the only thing that passed through his mind at the moment. "I'll be there soon."
"I will," he said. Beck closed his eyes as he tried to get the picture of her crying out of his mind. He looked at Tori with an apologetic glance as he turned his truck on all the way; maybe she would hear his squeaking fan belt over the receiver and calm down just a little. The last thing he needed right now was to walk into a death trap of crying and flying projectiles. "I'll see you soon."
"Okay," she said. The sound of her voice began to strengthen a little, getting back to the normal tone everyone was used to. That's why when she said the next few words, it caught Beck by surprise. "I love you."
I didn't have to ask. "Yeah... me, too," Beck said as his heart almost stopped. He hoped that his jaw dropping to the floor wasn't noticed by the thin brunette that still sat next to him with perfect posture. He didn't want his gaze on Tori to linger, so he quickly looked back at the time. He tried to give a head nod, for his friend to get the hint. "Hang on one sec."
Her head just tilted to the side in a ditzy way. It forced him to roll his eyes as he attempted one last time, but to no avail. His hand brought the phone away from his ear and pressed the mute button on his phone call. "I really have to go."
"Fine," Tori said with a huff. She put on an adorable pout as Beck turned to her. He pressed a kiss to her nose before holding the close position. "But will you pick me up for school tomorrow?"
"Of course, babe," he said as he smiled. She leaned in first, kissing him roughly for a quick moment. Tori liked to lour him in before leaving, and he always left definitely wanting more. She pressed her thumb against both sides of his mouth, getting rid of the peach lip gloss that was slightly smeared under his lips.
"See you tomorrow," she said with one final peck on his lips. She smiled and threw him a wink before she jumped out of his car.
He watched her frame as she strutted up the driveway. He smirked and raised an eyebrow at the rear-view mirror when she gave an obvious ass shake in his direction. He almost laughed but the glowing phone in his hand distracted his thoughts. He took the call off mute before putting it back up to his ear. "Sorry about that."
"It's fine. Whatever," she said as she let out a strong breath. "Just hurry up. Let's get this over with."
"Be there in ten." He said as she hung up on him. It took most of his control not to smash his phone within his grasp. He wanted to throw it through his windshield, or just let the screen crack under the pressure of his fist clenching down onto the smart phone. Beck had to take a deep breath to calm down. The way she started to talk to him was driving him insane.
He threw his phone down next to him in the empty seat before gripping onto the shift gear. He jerked the clutch back with enough force to make the truck skid a little before accelerating into the street. His foot pressed hard against the gas as he tried to think of everything but the task ahead of him.
Turn after turn, he could feel the tension thickening through the cool night air. How would he open the conversation? Should he kiss her one last time? It seemed like he only had a second to go over it in his mind before he was turning into her driveway.
Her two story house seemed vacant, with her bedroom light being the only sign of habitation at the moment. It shouldn't have surprised him as much as it did, with her parents always being out of town on business, or hardly having time for her at all. No cars in the driveway, so he turned straight in.
She must have heard his engine because by the time he took his key out of the ignition, his girlfriend, wearing nothing by a black tank-top and a pair of gray sweat pants. Her left arm was wrapped around her stomach, and her right hand was against her mouth, shoving her thumb nail between her teeth.
Jade didn't move over to him. She stayed by the door as Beck walked towards her, skipping the path her father had laid out in the grass completely. "Hey."
"Hey," Jade said, almost inaudibly. Her hands drop down to her side with a sigh, as her sad eyes rose to meet his. She held out her arms, awaiting a hug.
Beck wrapped his arms around her shoulders, and she took her normal place around his waist. He felt her breathe his scent in for a moment before pulling away from him. Her head tilted up to him, letting her place a kiss against his jaw line. "Alone again, I see."
Jade sighed again and moved away from his grasp, leading him through her front door. She grabbed onto his hand as she pulled him up the stairs. "You know I hate small talk."
"I know," Beck said as they finally arrived at her room, the door standing out from the others with the giant signs warning people what happens when you arrive at her boarders. "I know."
"Then get to the point." There was a hitch in her voice. Something that made his confidence, and everything he was sure about, fall away. All he wanted to do was pull her into his arms and never let her go, but he knew that couldn't happen.
Beck took a seat on her messy bed, pushing away her laptop and her old binder to the side. She stood a few feet away from him, taking a defensive stance. "Will you sit down?"
"No. I'm standing," she said with pure determination.
Beck ran a hand through his hair before letting a sigh escape. "Fine. Whatever... We need to talk."
"Yeah. I heard that part," she mumbled more to herself. She closed her eyes and cursed herself for saying that. She needed to work on thinking before speaking.
"I know," Beck snapped. He regretted it as soon as he put his face into his hands. He felt the bed shift against her weight as she plopped down next to him. "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you."
For a moment, there was nothing; no words, no movement, not a thing but thinking.
"You're breaking up with me." His gaze shifted to her, and he felt his heart begin to shatter. This wasn't his maniacal girlfriend that everyone knew and feared. Her eyes streaming tears down her face. She was trying to hold back to sobs, but her body was convulsing uncontrollably. "You're leaving me."
"Not leaving... I just need a break. We can still be friends-"
"Don't. I don't need your pity." Jade was now standing in front of him, the sadness was gone from her face and anger was beginning to replace it. "I don't want the lets just be friends bullshit! I can't just be friends with you, Beck."
"Then what do you want from me? Please. Just tell me," Beck said, rising to his feet. He was short tempered with all this fighting they were doing. Every second of every day for the past twelve days.
"I just want us to be in love. You said you loved me, and that we would make it work-"
"You can't always make it work, Jade. Sometimes being in love isn't enough to stop the fighting, the silent treatments, and the fucking jealousy." Beck moved away from her in frustration. "You think my dad didn't love my mom, and vice versa? They just couldn't make it work."
"But I'll change. I'll be who ever you want me to be," she pleaded. Her eyes struggled to hold back the tears and they stung fiercely as she fought to keep them open. "I need you."
"I need you to understand this. I need time to be away from you. We've been together for too long... some people just can't spend that much time together without it being over bearing," he said with a shrug.
"You need me, Beckette Oliver," Jade said in a stern voice. "I know you better than anyone every will. You love me, and even though you're hurting me now, I know you'll be back, regardless of who comes into your life. I love you."
"I do love you, Jade. I really wish that you would at least try and be friends with me... even though it's going to be a little hard. You're still my best friend," Beck said taking a step towards her. His arm was extend to her, but she pulled away from him once he began speaking again, "I just need some time to find out who I am without you."
"If you loved me you wouldn't be doing this to me," Jade mumbled, crossing her arms tightly over her chest as her body shook with a sob again. This was the forth time she broke down today.
"Jade... stop crying..."
Beck pulled her roughly against him into a hug as she began to cry harder and harder, struggling against his grasp. Her sobs shook her even more when she was in his arms. She fought against him, pulling away, and resisting every act of affection he was trying to use against her.
"There's someone else," she mumbled, finally getting the strength to break away from his grasp. Her tears flowed with anger as her tone grew stronger, "isn't there, Beck? You're leaving me for another girl."
He sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Why do you always assume that?"
"Because that's what it always is!" she said throwing her hands up in the air, "When you spend your night with me texting the entire time, and leaving right before we go to sleep to make a phone call. That's why. Alyssa Vaughn, Alex Johnson, Martha Jean. I'm not as blind as you are oblivious."
"How does that make me oblivious?"
"You don't notice how I watch you looking at these girls... it's the way you used to look at me," Jade said, her tone growing sad with each word she spoke. "It's how you started to look at other girls, when you'd get bored. That's when we started fighting."
"So I smile at a girl, it's not like I'm getting her pregnant," Beck said, completely flabbergasted. His eyes were wide, and his hands were thrown into the air again. "There's no way to win with you."
"Yes there is," Jade said, finally meeting his gaze with fear and longing, instead of hate and anger. "You could stay with me. We can work on this. I'll change if you do. I need you, Beck. You're the only reason I can feel anything at all. No one can make me happier than you. We're supposed to be together. No one can put up with your shit like I can. No one else knows how much I deal with because of you."
Her eyes were closed, attempting to hold back tears as Beck just stood and watched. He fought every urge he had to hold her and apologize for everything. Seeing her so upset killed him inside, but he knew what he wanted; he couldn't go back now.
"We'll still be close, Jade. It could be just like us being together, without actually being together... if that makes sense," Beck said, shaking his head at his word choice. "I'll still text you, and call you every now and then. We could even go laugh at the people in the mall, if you wanted."
"What I want is for you to be my boyfriend," she mumbled, rubbing her fingers under her eyes to try and rid her cheeks of the smudging make up that lined her face.
"I can't be that right now," Beck said with a sigh.
"But why not?" Jade yelled, "I've always been where you needed me, so why can't you return the favor once?"
"What are you talking about?" Beck asked as his jaw dropped, "You would start another fight."
"I don't want to keep fighting with you," she said, closing her eyes in frustration, "I just want to be with you. I need you not to leave. My life would be nothing without you. I can't open up with everyone else."
"I'm not leaving your life, so if you need me, I'll be there, just as a friend instead of your boyfriend," Beck said with a sigh.
"What if I don't want that?"
"Then I guess we can't be friends, either," Beck said with a sigh. He looked at the circular clock that rested on her bedside table and saw that time really does fly when you're breaking up. "I should probably get going."
"Then leave," Jade said, crossing her arms over her chest and turning away from him.
"Can I have a hug?"
Jade's cold stare shook him to the bone as she glared intensely at him. "No," she stated.
Beck felt his chest gain a few pounds as that word pierced his heart. This wasn't supposed to end like this. She was supposed to be understanding. Sad, but willing to just be friends if that was what he was offering. He turned his back on her with a remorse look. His head was hanging low as he went to leave the room. His hand was gripping the door knob when she finally spoke.
"Wait," she said. He didn't look back, "come here."
In a few quick, fast steps, his arms were wrapping around her fragile frame as she broke in front of him. Her arms wrapped in an awkward way around his stomach, clutching him to keep him from leaving. He held his breath as his eyes closed. She pushed hard against him, expectantly, and he couldn't keep her from staying.
"I'll text you later," Beck said was he walked slowly away from her. His hand clutched the handle again as he looked back at her. "Don't forget that I love you though."
"That's kind of hard since you just ripped out my heart," Jade said, crossing her arms over her chest in an attempt to be strong, but the added sniffling took away the intimidation.
"I understand," Beck said as he opened the door. "See ya."
"Yeah, bye," she said, turning away from him and pulling apart the belongings on her bed to make room for her body. She heard the door click closed and she couldn't help but collapse onto the bed, gripping the jacket that belonged to Beck. His smell still lingered on it as she pulled it close to her body, laying the head on the hood.
She pulled the blanket up to her chin around her and began to let her body shake with sobs openly. Who else did she have after all this?
When Beck arrived at his house, he ignored the angry voices of his concerned parents as they followed him up the stairs and straight into his bedroom. His mother's voice finally broke through his thoughts, "What on Earth could be this important, to be out this late, on a school night?"
"I broke up with Jade," Beck said as he slipped off his shoes.
"Oh, Honey," his mother cooed. She sat down on the edge of his bed as he sat down next to her, trying to undo his made bed with her butt getting in the way. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine. I broke up with her because I couldn't deal with all the fighting. Besides, that girl Tori likes me, and she's really awesome," he said with a smile. He watched his parents exchange a look, and his father gave his mother a quick shrug before leaving the room.
"Ron! Where are you-...?" She asked with a sigh and a roll of the eye. "Your father has absolutely no sensitivity. But are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes mom, I'm fine."
She pressed a kiss against his fore head before running a hand through his hair and down to his cheek, cupping it for a second before letting go. "Get some sleep. Goodnight, darling."
"Goodnight, mom," Beck said as he began to take off his shirt. She closed the door as he striped down to his boxers before getting under the covers. He turned to his bedside table, placing his phone on the counter top next to a picture frame. It held a picture of a happy couple: Jade sitting on his lap, smiling and laughing on a park bench, captured as the camera began to topple over for the millionth time that day. Beck couldn't help but laugh lightly at the memory.
For a moment, he began to debate on if he should take the picture down, but something in him held back. He didn't want to lose every part of his relationship with Jade. When he said that he still loved her, he meant it. But sometimes, being in love isn't enough to fix the fighting. This had to be done. She was going to flip out tomorrow when he saw Tori latched to his hip during the day.
The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Jade. He thought that was the worst part of it all. When she cried, it made what was going on all the more real. What both of them had known for the past two and a half years was going to change drastically. He wasn't going to put up with her jealousy. She couldn't be jealous if he wasn't her boyfriend.
She wasn't his girlfriend anymore, either. That was a weird feeling, and now he had Tori as his woman. The most popular girl in school, and a pretty, smart, perfectly clean cut teenager. They were supposed to be together. Everyone thought so, and so did she. It was going to be great.
But he still couldn't shake the feeling of being alone. Like, there was something missing. He reached for his phone as texted the same thing to two people: "Goodnight, doll. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Sweet dreams."
He awaited a response, but only received one from Tori. When a half an hour had passed, he thought it was best to just leave this one be. Maybe his ex-girlfriend needed the time to process what just happened, as did he.
He turned to his back to the picture and slowly began to fall asleep, even though he thought his mind would make it impossible. His dreams fell into the past, dreaming of Jade once again.