Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note.
A/N: Heh. Heh. Yeah, I'm still alive. A bit worse for wear from being away from this fic for so long, but here it is nonetheless.
I wanted to dedicate this chapter to WhiteLadyDragon who came up with this "destination;" thanks, pal, I owe you one! : )
The Entertainment Emporium
"Our next location, ladies and gentlemen, should be quite entertaining! Expect cheap entertainment, but entertainment nonetheless! Hold onto your wallets and common sense, folks, our next destination will be quite the extravaganza!
25 Minutes Later
Setting: A TV studio clad in darkness. No one is in the studio. All is quiet. Visibility is almost nil. Matsuda and Co. blindly stumble into the studio. Matsuda scratches his head in puzzlement.
"Wh-where is everybody? I told them that I was going to be bringing a tour through here. So where is –
**Matsuda is interrupted as bright, blinding lights suddenly flash on. Pop music blares deafening from speakers off to the sides and streamers of all different colours are released from somewhere up in the rafters. A man's face suddenly appears on the massive screen located in the centre of the studio. The man's face is pudgy and oily. Large glasses with yellow lenses surround his piggy eyes and his smile is one of exuberant scheming. He opens wide his arms, one hand clenching a bedazzled microphone, and his voice booms forth, startling Matsude and Co.**
"Welcome, my avid audience to my domain of pure and unrated entertainment! To the birthplace of eye-popping spectacle and mind-blowing news! Where the lights are always flashing, the music is always blaring, and the ratings are always going up, up, and UP! Welcome to..."
**The man spins around and holds his microphone up in the air in a power fist.**
**Sparklers burst forth from the ceiling and shower down on Matsuda and guests right before the man on the screen bursts through the curtains surrounding the TV studio stage. His arms are stretched wide, as if he's trying to encompass the whole studio, and his black mustache quivers as his lips spread wide in an almost leering grin.**
"I am your expert host for this tour, Hitoshi Demegawa! Be prepared to be amazed! To be awestruck! To be-"
**Suddenly Matsuda and Co. and Demegawa become doused in water as the sparklers set the fire sprinklers off. Demegawa starts swearing up a storm.**
"Dammit! Hokkaido, I told you to turn the sprinkler system off, you asshole! You ruined my whole entrance!"
"U-u-uh, sorry, Demegawa, sir! I'll go turn them off right away!"
**The assistant runs off and moments later the sprinklers cease. Demegawa runs a fat hand through his cropped hair and shakes himself off. He plasters his cheesy, scheming smile on again.**
"Ha, a little rain shower can't stop me! We're going to amaze you like no other TV studio has done before, or will ever do! I guarantee that you won't leave this place with your mouths closed! My goal is for them to be wide, gapping open with amazement! (And your wallets a little less full once you step through our in-studio gift shop...heh heh).
"Sorry, what was that last part, Demegawa, sir?"
"Ah, nothing! Nothing at all, Mistuba!"
"Uh, it's Matsuda actually, Demegawa. Matsuda is my na-"
"Yeah, yeah, whatever! Let's not stand here babbling away when there's money to be made – uh, I mean bewilderment to be made! The first part of our tour is the Sakura TV offices! Better grab your raincoats, my eager audience, because our team of creators – uh, I mean writers – sure brainstorm a hurricane of topics in there! Ha, ha, get it? Brainstorm, hurricane?!"
**Nobody laughs at Demegawa's sorry attempt at a joke. Demegawa doesn't acknowledge the lack of laugher.**
"Ha ha, I crack myself up!"
2 Minutes Later
Setting: A small boardroom. The only pieces of furniture are simple office chairs and a medium length table. Posters of different Sakura TV programs and specials plaster the walls. A group of frazzled Sakura TV employees occupy the chairs. Papers are strewn everywhere on the table, along with multiple styrofoam cups of coffee. The employees instantly become tense and alert as Demegawa enters the room, followed closely by Matsuda and Co.
"This here is where the magic happens! The very birthplace of Sakura TV!"
"So this is where your journalists compare news stories that they've gathered throughout the week, Demegawa, sir?"
"Ha...uh, YES! This is where they compare and, um, contrast their news stories. Our very talented and top-notch, um, err – what did you call them again, Mutsida?
"Um, journalists. And it's Matsuda, Deme —"
"Journalists! Of course! And these aren't just your run-of-the-mill, um, journalists either, my captured audience! Sakura TV only hires the best, the top-of-the-heap, the cream-of-the-crop, the-richest-of-"
"Ha, ha, I think we understand, Demegawa, sir. Would it be possible to hear some of the stories they've collected?"
"I'll tell you what, Meetsuuda-"
" - I'm feeling generous today, so I'll allow you and your lovely audience to experience firsthand the brilliancy of Sakura TV's...um, what was it again?"
"HA! Yes! Journalists! If there's one thing we take pride in here at Sakura TV, it's high-quality journalistic-ism."
"You mean 'journalism,' I presume?"
"HA! That's what I said! Now, boys, show us what you've got!"
**Instantly the room explodes with all of the employees trying to vie for Demegawa's attention by yelling out their "news stories."**
"Kira saves baby from burning building by killing arsonist kidnapper!"
"Hideki Ryuga shaves head for new movie role!"
"Misa Amane donates thousands of yen to endangered penguins in Antarctica!"
"Kira voted most desired candidate for "The Bachelor's" new season!"
"Donations will be gathered to update Sakura TV's logo!"
"That one! That one just mentioned! That's a keeper! True, raw talent right there!"
"B-but that donation idea didn't even sound much like a news worthy item, Demegawa, sir. And I don't think Misa Amane is-"
"Listen, Myzuttata, this is a news station! We get word of the hot news as soon as it happens! You just wait! In a couple of days you'll be seeing Misa Misa skipping around in a parka with baby penguins – just you wait!"
"Uh, well, um-"
"Carrying on! We still have lots to see! Oh, and give that man a raise!"
**Employee sits further up in seat and looks hopeful.**
"R-really, Demegawa, sir? You'll give me a raise?"
"HA! What? Did I say that? The coffee is going to your brain, my good man!"
**Demegawa pretty much shoves Matsuda and Co. out of the boardroom with his gut, leaving both the disappointed employee and other "journalists" behind.**
4 Minutes Later
Setting: A darkened room that is only lit by multiple TV screens lined against a wall. A half-awake employee is slumped against the wide desk in front of the TVs. Numerous programs from Sakura TV are playing.
"This here is our fabulous station and editing room! Here we cut all of the unnecessary and boring parts from our programs and enrich them with entertainment galore! We also watch the live broadcasts from up here as well!"
"Wow! You sure have a lot of TV monitors! And a lot of TV programs based on all of the shows being displayed on the screens."
"Oh, yes, yes! Sakura TV is immensely proud to be airing over thirty programs, including five new series premiering this summer! You know what they say, the more the merrier! The bigger the better! The costlier the —"
"H-h-HEY! That program on that screen right there!"
**Matsuda's outburst rouses the half-asleep employee and she bolts up in her chair, giving Demegawa a sheepish grin. Demegawa follows where Matsuda is pointing and grins mischievously at the image on the screen.**
"Oh, yes! That was one of our highest-rated specials that we aired not too long ago! Ratings were off the charts! Suspense was through the roof! Financial support was pouring in -"
"Of course, I don't need to tell you any of that, do I? Mitsubishi?"
"I-it's Matsuda and why are you airing this program again?! It wasn't real and, and – oh, no, I hate this part!"
**The screen shows two frosted screens propped up on the centre stage of the Sakura TV studio. Two figures are seated behind the frosted panes. The volume is relatively quiet, but it is audible enough to hear that the two figures are talking about Kira and how one of them knows who Kira is. Suddenly, one of the frosted screens crashes down and reveals Matsuda cowering in his chair. There is a commotion on screen as Sakura TV attendants frantically try to cover up Matsuda's face. It is a broadcast that Matsuda remembers all too well.**
"Why?! Why are you showing this again, Demegawa?!"
"HA HA! Don't worry, Mztuda! This is just a tape of the broadcast that we like to watch every now and then on these screens! Brings back good memories of the excitement, the intrigue, the mystery, the INCREASE IN RATINGS!"
"Siggghhh...it doesn't bring back good memories to me."
"No good memories!? Why this very broadcast paid my weekly vacation! It was spectacular! It was TV at its ripest! If only it would happen again – uh! Um..."
"Yes, Demegawa, sir?"
**Demegawa leers at Matsuda with a scheming smile. He rubs his hands together and chuckles lowly to himself.**
"Mmitsuda! I just came up with a wonderful thing to show you and your entranced audience!"
"Anything besides this broadcast sounds good to me..."
"Of course, of course! Just follow me back down to the studio and prepared to be amazed!"
10 Minutes Later
"Demegawa! Get me out of HERE!"
"Are the cameras rolling? That scream of his could make a great opening to the broadcast!"
**Matsuda is tied up to a chair and is seated behind a similar looking frosted screen from the broadcast he was involved in before. The brightest lights are beaming oppressively down on him and the stage. Pop music is screeching forth from the speakers. Assistants and camera men are running around, preparing for an impromptu broadcast. The tourists are sitting in the audience section of the studio, eagerly anticipating the live show. Demegawa is beaming so much his face is turning a deep red.**
"What is this?! You told me you were going to show me a new camera that Sakura TV bought, and the next thing I knew I was strapped to this chair! What are you thinking?!"
"Just sit still and be patient! The magic of TV will begin shortly! You made me thousands once, you're going to do it again, Meetzida, with this spur-of-the-moment broadcast!"
"Wha-what!? What are you planning a-and it's Matsuda!"
"Shhhh! We're rolling!"
**The cameras start to roll, the lights become brighter, and the music momentarily stops as Demegawa bounds onto the studio stage.**
"My avid, delightful, fully stocked audience! Welcome to the second part of the Kira special we aired three months ago! Last time, you heard the harrowing account of a mysterious individual who claimed to know the identity of the one and only Kira! After our last broadcast was cut short, we have brought him back and he's ready to finally talk! To finally spill the beans! To finally let loose -"
"Demegawa, are you crazy?!"
"Don't you dare touch that remote control, my richly appealing audience! You won't want to miss this! Only aired on Sakura TV! (The ratings are going to go off the charts!)
**Matsuda's yells are cut short as the pop music blares forth again and Demegawa steps off the stage while a commercial break begins. Matsuda sinks further in his seat and half-cries out.**
"Why do these things always happen to me?"
"HA HA! I love how this always happens to me! Rake in those ratings, boys! Keep 'em coming, keep 'em rooooollllling in! No one does entertainment like-"
"Tying me up in a chair is not entertainment, Demegawa-"
A/N: Man, it was getting difficult to figure out ways to screw up writing Matsuda's name. :P Hope you enjoyed and always open to new ideas for "destinations."