Disclaimer: I do not own anything regarding to The Secret Circle and do not write fanfiction for profit.
Alone – One shot
No one understood. They never would how could they? To be truly alone, all the time no matter what time of day, no matter where you were, no matter who you were with.
"You ok Faye?" Mellissa asks in her sweet polite way. Even her best friend doesn't understand her, every now and then Faye will give her a small part of herself to tide over her curiosity because that's all it is, curiosity. If she ever found out the truth even her best friend would leave her. Right now she was happy to pretend that she was with her. That she wasn't alone.
"Yeah thanks just tired I guess." She had been using that excuse a lot lately and soon Melissa would become curious again. She'd have to try a different one next time but for now it made her happy.
No one could ever understand, apart from maybe Nick when he was alive but even then he was too far stuck in his own circumstances that he was of no support. They had never been close either apart from one night when they had both just gotten high and made the mistake of sleeping together again. It was a wonderful moment when afterwards he must have sensed there was something wrong with her and he just collected her in his arms and they slept together till the next day. Then everything went back to normal but for that one moment having someone care about you completely was beautiful.
The circle all tolerated her she knew that, they wondered why she fought against them all the time. Why wouldn't she? She knew they didn't care, that they just thought of her as the annoying necessary tag along for their magic. If they could she knew they would leave her out of all the witchcraft stuff. It had never been their choice to have her around. Even when they were little kids in kindergarten they didn't waste their time on the Chamberlain kid. Even back then people treaded carefully around her and left her out. They didn't want to be around her, for years as a child she didn't understand she thought something was really wrong with her. Slowly over the years she realised to shut her emotions off, to distance herself and never get involved. There had been a few blips over the years.
Jake Armstrong being the most present. She had let her guard down, she had gotten close even when all of his actions were telling her that he was just like the rest. That he was just using her. She knew deep down it had been a mistake the second she let her walls down but she couldn't help it. She fell for him, and in return he stomped on anything that was left in her heart.
That was the last time and it would remain that way especially now with Cassie Blake on the scene. The second the blond girl had showed up she felt the stirrings of hope, she had wanted, no needed to be connected to her. So she had tried, very timidly, to make that connection. But everything went wrong, when she warned her off Jake because she truly knew what he was like she was the jealous bitch. When she tried to tell her that the situation with Adam, Diana and her was going to end only in heartbreak for at least Diana she was again the jealous bitch. She was trying and no one recognised it. Why would she bother to fight about all of these situations she wasn't even concerned with if she wasn't trying to help? No one realised. No one cared.
So when they all ganged up on her the night of the fire and ice dance after her unsuccessful attempt at getting her individual power back she realised. It wasn't worth it. Her heart was slowly starting to feel as it had after Jake slowly but surely crack by crack it was being battered and bruised just by being around these people especially her, Cassie. She could see it in her eyes it was there behind her baby blues she could see it.
She didn't want to know her; she didn't want to even try. So Faye walked away, heartbroken again making only one promise to herself.
Never, ever, let anyone try to get it, because they'll never understand.