Dear Fangirls and Fanboys,

Greetings, I am the man known as General Sephiroth. Recently, I have discovered the letter Genesis has addressed to you, and I have decided to write one as well to clear up some of the things he said, and some of the things you good people seem so keen on writing me as.

First off, I respect your rights to put me in your fanfictions, and I must say I have come across a few that are really well written. Some key points I would like to point out in those stories, is that they take a unique perspective on my background. While I shall not digress to you about my past, I shall encourage you to come up with original ideas as opposed to the more common ones seen on this site. There was one that I enjoyed, where I was not as socially deprived as many of you see me as. Which I am not. I am merely serious, and cold to those to whom I have just met. In a military setting, we are always to be on top of our game, and causal chitchat is unnecessary, and therefore a waste of time. Pardon, I have begun to ramble.

Now, to address something that dear Genesis said. He claimed that there is the chance I am bisexual. Scientifically speaking, almost every single person is bisexual, even if they do not realize it. Most of us unconsciously choose to be either straight or gay. So, there are actually very few people who are truly gay or straight. Which is why homophobia is bad. I'm pretty sure Genesis is self chosen gay, even if he did say he was straight. I, myself, prefer women over men. Women smell better.

Now, there is one thing that you fans write that really disturbs me. You often make me come out like some psychopathic sex machine. The main problem is I'm a sex machine. That is the really big problem in quite a few stories. My sex drive can be described as being in reverse. Imagine my sex drive as Sheldon Cooper's. Yes, it is like that, only without the OCD problems. Genesis is the one who possess that characteristic. Not to discourage you from writing yaoi, but can you try to tone that part down about? I'm a rather straight forward person, and in private quarters, have no real big problem with affectionate touching, if I am in love.

I also would like to show appreciation for those of you who have written a more softer side of me. I wish I could claim that I am really like that, but that, sadly, is not the case. No matter how much I wish it was... I quite enjoy those stories, and came across one involving a kitten that was really heart warming, and a good tear jerker, as Genesis would describe it. I'm am fairly positive that man is gay...

Onto the topic of Genesis. I'd like to say one thing, that man would never submit to me, and I would never submit to him. With our... relationship, an intimate one would never work. We'd end up killing each other. Brutally. However, I do respect the man to a great degree, and enjoy his company. When he is quite, and not trying to out shine me. It gets aggravating after a while.

Next, Angeal. We would never work. Merely because we are both dominant lovers, and our personalities crash as lovers. I think many of you have seen this, since there is hardly any pairings of us out there.

Oh, and please, the next writer to describe as feminine in my physique in anyway, shall have my sword through their back. I have long hair, but not a curvy body.

Also, to that one person out there who even thought of pairing me with Hojo, the threat applies to you. I HATE the man. I even capitalized hate to prove how much I loathe him.

Well, that is all I can think of to say to you in this brief letter. I appreciate that you gave the time of day to read this, and would be willing to write back if you have any more questions. Also, for your entertainment, I must admit, the look on my face upon finding out what Sehpisis is, was quite a shocker.

Sincerely,

General Sephiroth

A/n: I would like to thank Atasi for giving me the idea of Sephiroth or Zack refuting Gen's sexuality claim. It inspired this letter, and so did lilitachisama's review. Maybe I will do one for Zack as well... And Angeal too... A letter ficlet with a plot... What say you?