Nier…Such a delicate young man, isn't he? That's what I thought when we first meet…but I soon learned for a 'delicate' looking boy, he knew how to hold his own! Anyway, at the time I wasn't very impressed, and FUCK! I was mad as all hell when that beast got away! Even when I passed out, I thought it was all over, he knew I had a shade inside me, yet he let me live. I was grateful for that...I lived to see another day, a day where I can finally shit on that lizard for killing grandma… When we finally parted, I hated to say it, but I almost missed the kid. He DID help, after all…But no, I knew making friends at this point was impossible, and besides, he's long gone by now. Another day being alone…well, not exactly alone, not with HIM inside me…
But that kid came back, and not only help me beat that thing for good, he SAVED me. Me of all people…even though he knew nothing about me…nothing about this thing inside me, nothing about me packing some serious FUCKING heat. He still accepted, and called me his friend. I knew from there, my life wasn't exactly over…it only just began, it was a new beginning with Nier, the devoted younger brother rescuing his sister from the black scrawl, Grimoire Weiss, the fucking know it all piece of shit wrapped in toilet paper, and myself, in a journey to ultimately save the world. We traveled to various places, meet interesting people, did chores for elderly. At first it was all mundane, but then I learned that it wasn't so bad. I even enjoyed some of the tasks we performed (ex. Killing loads of SHADES), and all was right with the world….
But no, it wasn't right with the world, at least not in mine…Ive been having a serious problem. A SERIOUS. FUCKING. PROBLEM here. I've been noticing Nier a lot more lately, I stare at him longer than necessary… my eye wonder dangerously… whenever we walk, I keep staring at his ass…now, I know, you'd say to yourself, 'there isn't anything wrong, Kaine, your simply developing feeling for the kid' But that's not the REAL problem here…me liking him is seriously bugging the crap out of me. It's not so much me liking him is the problem here, it's the things I IMAGINE, the thing I WANT to do to him that scares me…let me put it to you all this way…When I think about Nier, and wanting to have sex with him, I don't imagine myself being the WOMAN in that scenario…I think of myself as the fucker, and him as the fuckee….
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME! I've always HATED myself for being 'different'. I'll straight out say it, I have a cock, damn it! A long, hard 8 inch hotdog with everything on it! FUCK! I want to FUCK him, I want to fuck him so hard he'd think he's a girl… and SHIT! The kids fucking 15! He's 7 years younger than me, damn it! That makes me a fucking pedophile… A boy loving, ass fucking pedophile! And I couldn't take it anymore. When he's close to me, when he bends down to pick things up….it makes me want to…FUCK! I always get rock hard whenever he does something that just tickles me the right way. That ass, his skin, his voice…Fuck. It makes the male in me want to FUCK him. MAKE HIM MY FUCKING CUNT BOY….!
….Damn. I just had to let all that out, you know? It's a strange site when you think about it, right? 'A well-endowed woman….nice ass…curvy body…wide hips…swinging meat… Fucking the shit out of this little kid'…Its defiantly not something you see every day…or HEAR about either…
This whole thought started when we all went to the beach, with Weiss and Emil…Now the boys were in their bathing suits, which alone made me pitch a tent…But what Nier was wearing…without a care in the world he whore the tightest little bathing shorts I've ever scene. It was then and there I couldn't take it anymore. I found a little rock by the beach to hide by, and you know what I did? I masturbated. I jacked of for a long time…thinking of all the things I'd do to the kid…FUCK!
Flash forward to the present. Currently Nier, Weiss, and I are wondering the northern plains, collecting medial herbs for Popola. She's some lady who pretty much pays the kid to do stupid shit like pulling weeds, and knows everything….
"Kaine, are you okay?"
I suddenly jerked my head forward, facing to see who just spoke…
"Nier," I mumbled, gesturing towards him. "WHAT?"
"You've been staring out into space for the longest time…Something on your mind?" said Nier. Sure enough, I've been staring into space, medical herbs forgotten. "Fuck of…", I responded.
"Common, Kaine, don't be like that! If your worried about the shades, we'd protect you."
Damn him for caring…especially since my thoughts about him are usually dirty. I didn't deserve his kindness….
"I said FUCK OFF! I just want to think by myself for a bit, k?" Just than Weiss decided to chime in:
"For Pete's sake woman, do you need to be so vile? I don't even know why he bothers…."
Nier turns sharply at Weiss, "Its because were friends! Why shouldn't I help?"
"Even if it means you to suffer her vulgarity?" responds Weiss.
"Of course! Besides, that's the way Kaine has always been! Don't tell me you expected a different response from her, did you? Did it surprise you that much? You know better than that!"
Weiss, surprised with Nier's reasoning, states, " I suppose your right…though I still cant stand it!"
Kaine, who'd been watching the whole exchange, couldn't help but appreciate Nier standing up for her like that. Not that she needed it, of course, but still…. 'Damn, that's why I feel guilty for thinking these sick thoughts about him…hes so nice, honest, pure even…Shit."
"kaine? We're heading out now! Common!" shouted Nier
"Right" responded Kaine. 'Maybe I'll get over it' Kaine thought, 'Maybe I can learn to love him…as opposed to giving into my sick, male thoughts….besides…he isn't THAT kind of guy….FUCK why is it so complicated? Im a WOMAN, worried about a HOMPOHOBIC RELAIONSHIP WITH A MAN'
"…Im so fucked up" whispered Kaine, as she walked alongside her companions.
Nier, being the observer of the group, heard her silent words and took note of it. 'Im really worried about Kaine.' Nier thought, 'When we return the herb, need to find some time to have a talk with her…'
Nier, determined to get to the bottom of it all, walked towards his home village. Determination filling his heart as he took each step, as he prepares himself for what's about to come…