Tenchi Muyo: Ryo-ohki OVA4

Episode 22: Baby Blues

By Galaxy1001D

Tenchi Muyo, Tenchi GXP, Tenchi Universe, Tenchi in Tokyo and all related characters and movies are © AIC/Pioneer/Funimation. This story has been written solely for entertainment. The views expressed herein do not necessarily express the opinions of AIC/Pioneer/Funimation, the author, or this website.

Chapter Nine: Animal Attraction

"Quick somebody, take the baby," Ryoko ordered. As Noike stepped forwards with her arms out, the former space pirate brushed past her. "Yeah right," the pirate grunted. "Ayeka, take the baby," she added as she thrust her infant mother into the teenage princess' hands. "We don't know how the hormones are going to affect me so until I get used to them I want you to keep an eye on her. As for me, I'm going into isolation until I can get ahold of myself!"

"Are you alright Ryoko?" Sasami asked timidly.

"No I'm not alright!" Ryoko snapped. "My breasts are swollen and my butt sags and my hair is ugly and I look old and everybody says I've had a hard life 'cause I look old enough to be Tenchi's mother and everybody hates me 'cause I'm an evil space pirate! And now I'm out of my mind and can't even touch my baby!" She collapsed to the floor crying bitterly as Washu howled in Ayeka's arms. "I'm an unfit mother and everybody hates me…" the pirate sniveled.

For a moment, everyone was frozen in place until Tenchi took charge and doled out the responsibilities. "Okay everyone, let's go into action!" he said as clapped his hands to get the girl's attention. "Ayeka! Sasami! Take care of Washu! Mihoshi! You're with me! We'll take care of Ryoko!"

"Right," Sasami nodded as she followed Ayeka, the baby, and Ryo-ohki out the door of Washu's lab and back into the Masaki house.

"What about me?" Noike asked.

"Noike, see if you can use Washu's science to find a way to counteract the hormonal changes affecting Ryoko," Tenchi said. "I know that Computer-Washu said the effects were temporary but I don't want to go through this any longer than we have to." He turned to Mihoshi. "Come on; let's get Ryoko up on her feet."

"Right," the bronze skinned blonde nodded.

"Don't touch me!" Ryoko snarled as she pulled herself away from Mihoshi. "You did this to me! This is your fault! Now my boobs will sag more than ever! I might be a dairy factory but Tenchi will never touch me 'cause I'm old and ugly and don't deserve it! I hate you! I hate all of you! And I hate me more…" She covered her face with her hands and sunk back down to her knees.

"Come on, Ryoko, you don't mean it," Tenchi said as he pulled the blubbering space pirate to her feet. "And to be honest, you don't look any different. The hormones are making you overreact."

"Oh Tenchi…" Ryoko whined. "Don't look at me! I'm fat and ugly…"

"No you're not," Tenchi said. "I'll touch you. Look, I'm touching you right now. It's going to be alright. The effects are temporary. You'll see."

Meanwhile in the living room of the Masaki house Ryo-ohki and the two Jurian princesses were trying to help baby Washu.

"Please, stop crying!" a flustered Ayeka begged the red-faced infant bawling on the 'L' shaped couch. "Try to calm down, please!"

"Meow," Ryo-ohki in furry toddler form added as she stroked Washu's head like a kitten and made purring sounds.

"Sasami, is the milk heated up?" Ayeka called.

"Yes!" the little princess yelped as she dashed into the room holding a baby bottle. "Here it is!"

"Quick Sasami! Give it to me!" Ayeka gestured frantically as Sasami raced over to her. "Thank you!" she said as she plucked the baby bottle from her sister's hands. "There you go," she cooed sweetly as she squeezed bottle to make sure the nipple was working and put the rubber nipple in Washu's mouth. "There-there. Everything's going to be alright. You like your bottle don't you? Don't worry about a thing. Just enjoy your bottle and relax. There's a good girl…"

Washu whined a little before nursing on the bottle.

"It's working," Sasami said softly. "She's calming down and she looks like she's about to pass out."

"Phew," Ayeka gasped. "Thank goodness that worked. I don't know what we would have done otherwise!"

Back in the lab, Tenchi had laid Ryoko down on a long couch and was perched on the edge, trying to talk some sense into her.

"Please, stop crying!" a flustered Tenchi begged the red-faced woman bawling on the couch. "Try to calm down, please!"

"Yeow," Noike grunted as she put her hands over her ears to protect herself from the caterwauling coming from the space pirate.

"Mihoshi, is the sake heated up?" Tenchi called.

"Yes!" the blonde yelped as she dashed into the room holding a sake bottle. "Here it is!"

"Quick Mihoshi! Give it to me!" Tenchi gestured frantically as Mihoshi raced over to him. "Thank you," he grunted as he plucked the sake bottle from the space cop's hands. "There you go," he said gently as he uncorked the bottle and placed the mouth of the bottle in Ryoko's mouth. "There-there. Everything's going to be alright. You like your sake don't you? Don't worry about a thing. Just enjoy your sake and relax. There's a good girl…"

Ryoko whined a little before nursing on the bottle of sake.

"It's working," Mihoshi said softly. "She's calming down and she looks like she's about to pass out."

"Phew," Tenchi gasped. "Thank goodness that worked. I don't know what we would have done otherwise!"

When Ryoko woke up there was a terrible weight on her chest. "Oh no!" she gasped as her eyes snapped open. "My boobs must be the size of watermelons!" She looked down at her chest in horror and beheld…

…Ryo-ohki in toddler form napping on top of her, using her breasts as pillows.

"Get off me you little rugrat!" she snarled as she rose to her feet.

"Meow!" Ryo-ohki whined as she rolled off the pirate, off the futon and on to the floor.

"Oh! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Ryoko said as she sat up and hugged Ryo-ohki. "It's okay! Honest!"

"What's the matter with me?" the pirate muttered under her breath. "Why aren't I chucking this lost cause like a baseball? It's like I've got some compulsion to protect and nurture this little furball or something. Oh well, it must be almost time for dinner."

She looked around. She was in her room. Good. That meant she could change into a loose robe. She was feeling constricted and wanted freedom of movement. She tied her spiky hair into a ponytail to get it out of the way and changed clothes.

Mealtime was an interesting experience. Ryoko came downstairs to find Tenchi and the girls around the table as Sasami and Noike dished up.

"Well it's about time!" Ayeka scolded. "We were just about to send someone to go get you when… uh… What's the matter with you?"

Ryoko was leaning against the wall, sweating and panting like a dog. She squirmed and twisted as she gasped for breath. "I don't know! Suddenly, I feel so strange! What's happening to me?"

"Oh my goodness!" Ayeka exclaimed quietly as she put her hand over her mouth. "Here," she said as she walked over to the stricken space pirate. "You better sit down before—Waugh!"

Before anyone could react, the sweaty space pirate had embraced the first princess of Jurai and smashed her mouth against the royal lips.

As Ayeka fought to free herself the rest of the group stared in openmouthed shock. Sasami put her little hand over the toddler Ryo-ohki's eyes. Tenchi unconsciously put his hand over Sasami's eyes. Baby Washu squirmed and kicked in her baby chair as if she was off in her own little world.

"Wow," Mihoshi smiled. "Now that you aren't fighting anymore you two are really getting along! I'm impressed!"

"Ah!" Ayeka gasped as she managed to free her face from Ryoko's hungry mouth. "I can't breathe! Get her off me!"

"Kiss me, please!" Ryoko whined. "Don't leave me alone. I can't stand it!"

As one, Mihoshi and Noike stepped forward and struggled to pry the pair apart.

"It's okay Ayeka," Noike grunted as she pulled the princess out of the pirate's arms. "I've got you!"

"Aaah!" Ayeka screamed as she was wrenched from Ryoko's iron grip. The sound of tearing cloth was heard.

"Now Ryoko you must control yourself!" Mihoshi scolded as she gripped the delirious pirate's shoulders.

"Ooh…" Ryoko's eyes drooped as she leaned back into Mihoshi, pinning the hapless blonde against the wall. She grunted and panted as she rubbed her back against the squirming space cop.

"Hey!" Mihoshi protested. "What are you doing? I can't move! Ryoko I'm having a hard time breathing back here!

"You animal!" Ayeka screeched. "Don't you ever brush your teeth? You could also take a bath once in a while!"

"Help me somebody please!" Ryoko groaned huskily as her eyes rolled back in her head. "I can't stand being like this. I'm going crazy! I feel so strange…"

"Ryoko, we've got to get you back to the lab," Tenchi said as he walked up and pulled on her hand.

"Tenchi!" Ryoko gasped as she tackled him.

The girls looked down in horror as Tenchi and Ryoko struggled on the floor.

"Wow," Mihoshi murmured over the sound of gasping and groaning. "So that's how babies are made!"

"Get her off him!" Ayeka shrieked. "I don't care if they are wearing clothes, at this rate they won't for much longer!"

"Whee!" Baby Washu squealed with glee in her baby chair.

Soon the women were pushing Ryoko into Washu's interdimensional lab.

"Don't touch me there!" Mihoshi squealed as the quartet of interstellar beauties burst into the large futuristic chamber.

"Hands off me!" Ayeka snarled as they pulled Ryoko over to an examination table.

"I'm not that kind of girl!" Noike snapped as they pushed her down on the table.

"Help me!" Ryoko gasped weakly as they activated the silvery restraints. "Help me please!" she moaned as she struggled against her bonds.

"Here," Noike said as she picked up a syringe and injected Ryoko's arm. "This should counteract the effects of the hormones temporarily. Computer!"

Washu's twelve year old image appeared on a huge view screen. "Yo."

"Ryoko is reacting poorly to the hormone treatment," the emerald haired enchantress announced. "We need treatment options."

"Poorly?" Ayeka snarled as she closed Ryoko's loose robe so the pirate wasn't flashing the laboratory. "More like obscenely!"

"Hm, well side effects were bound to be experienced," Washu's image shrugged. "I'll run some scans and see what's happening, although her biosystems are so complex it may take some time for an accurate analysis."

"Do what you've got to do," Noike shrugged.

The doors to the chamber opened and little Sasami dashed in with a particularly girly run. "I need some help out there!" the little princess chirped. "The baby's acting really strange and Tenchi's just lying on the floor with a funny look on his face!"

"I'm on it Sasami," Ayeka said as she took her sister's hand and led her out of the room.

"How are you feeling Ryoko?" Noike asked the shackled pirate. "Calming down now?"

"Yeah, I think I'm okay now," Ryoko blushed before relaxing. "I just don't know what happened to me out there. It's like I wasn't me anymore."

"Your body reacted to the presence of individuals who are biologically ready for sexual activity," the image of Washu announced from the giant screen on the wall. "With the hormone treatment you received your reproductive instincts went into overdrive."

"What?" Ryoko growled. "Mom! Damn you! You did this to me!"

"First, I'm not your mother," Washu's image corrected from the screen. "The little baby in the kitchen is. Secondly it was you who requested the hormone treatment…"

"You sick little monkey!" Ryoko struggled to get free. "When I get out of this I'm going to kill you!"

"You better go Mihoshi before she remembers it was you who gave her the shot," Noike muttered to the blonde.

"Ooh! Good idea," Mihoshi nodded before she tiptoed to the door.

Later Ryoko locked herself in her room. The sound of her crying was audible to the whole house.

"I can't stand this," Ayeka moaned as she entered the living room to find Tenchi and the rest of the girls. "I don't know how much longer this can go on."

"Somebody's got to talk to her," Tenchi said as he rose from the couch. "This can't be good for the baby and besides, what if Ryoko tries to hurt herself? I've notice that her fast healing power doesn't work when she's down on herself."

"If you go in there you're going to need a cattle prod," Noike said as the redhaired baby screamed in her arms. "Let's find out what Washu's computer has to say. It should have had enough to time to make sense of the readings it took from Ryoko by now."

The rest of the girls nodded and followed her through the door under the stairs. Tenchi stopped at the door and groaned as he listened Ryoko's anguished sobbing.

Once inside the lab Noike handed the baby to Mihoshi and addressed the computer. "Computer, have you completed your analysis?"

Washu's twelve year old image appeared on the screen. "Hi guys. Ryoko's system is pretty much going through what you'd expect."

"What do you mean by that?" Sasami asked as toddler Ryo-ohki nodded.

Meanwhile Tenchi knocked on the door to Ryoko's attic bedroom. "Ryoko? Are you decent?"

"Go away!" Ryoko sniveled. "I'm fat and I'm ugly and I don't want you to see me like this!"

"Come on, Ryoko," Tenchi gently lectured. "You've got to talk to someone! You can't go on like this. We're worried about you."

"Everybody hates me!" Ryoko whined. "Nobody loves me!"

"Don't talk like that," Tenchi scolded through the door. "I love you. We all love you. Even Ayeka. You're part of our family…"

The door opened. "You love me?" gasped the space pirate. Tenchi was taken aback by her condition. Her wild cyan white hair was stringy and matted against her scalp. Her cheeks were tearstained and her eyes were red and puffy. Her normally attractive features were warped into a wan, sickly, grief-stricken parody of a woman's face. Her loose robe was almost open in front, nearly exposing her naked body to view. She was sweaty. She was smelly. She needed a breath mint. Her breasts, thighs, and other sexual attributes seemed swollen and exaggerated. She was hunched over like Quasimodo and staggering like a drunk. She was hideous.

And Tenchi couldn't remember that last time he wanted a woman this much.

"God! Yes!" He heard himself say before he put his arms around her and pressed his mouth against hers.

Meanwhile back in the lab Washu's image on the screen continued her diagnosis. "Ryoko will suffer some bloating, a darkening of the nipples and arolas, and other signs of her pseudo-pregnancy. Her body is also sending out pheromones and she might begin lactating…"

"Pheromones?" Mihoshi interrupted as she held the cooing baby. "Wait a minute; I've heard that word before. They use pheromones in perfumes don't they?"

"Technically, a pheromone is a secreted or excreted chemical factor that triggers a social response in members of the same species," the image of Washu on the screen lectured. "Pheromones are chemicals capable of acting outside the body of the secreting individual to impact the behavior of the receiving individual."

"Yes-yes I've heard of pheromones," Ayeka interrupted. "Just what kind of 'social response' are Ryoko's pheromones going to trigger anyway?"

"Based off the readings I took Ryoko should be sending out a powerful kind of sex pheromone," Washu's image replied. "Pheromones have evolved in all animal phyla, to signal sex and dominance status, and are responsible for stereotypical social and sexual behavior among members of the same species. In mammals, these chemical signals are believed to be detected primarily by the…"

"Holy Great Mother of Tsunami!" Ayeka cried, causing Sasami and Ryo-ohki to jump. "Ryoko's sending out Love Potion Number Nine! Where's Tenchi?"

"He came in with us," Noike said before she looked around. "I guess he didn't."

"Tenchi!" Ayeka squeaked. "Where's Tenchi? Oh no! He could be with Ryoko! Doing this! And doing that! It can't be!"

"Ayeka don't worry!" Mihoshi giggled. "Tenchi isn't doing anything like that. We know because little Washu here senses everything that Ryoko's feeling and right now she's howling and crying. Isn't she… huh?" The blonde looked down at the baby in her arms to find that baby Washu wasn't howling or crying at all. She was writhing in Mihoshi's arms cooing and giggling instead. The baby's little blue eyes rolled back in her head as she trembled and made joyous little squeaks.

Ayeka's face was a hideous grimace as every last ounce of color drained from her face. "Oh no! We've got to stop them!" she gasped as she ran out of the lab.

Sasami turned to follow when she felt Noike's hand on her shoulder. "Sasami, you and Ryo-ohki better stay downstairs here with little Washu. Mihoshi come with me. Bring your Galaxy Police blaster and set it on heavy stun."

In the meantime the first princess of Jurai dashed upstairs to the attic loft that was Ryoko's room. When she got there, she froze in the doorway as her face contorted in horror. Hoarse passionate gasps and moans assaulted her ears but that was nothing compared to obscenity that ambushed her eyes! "Oh no!" she screamed. "Tenchi! Ryoko! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"


Outside, a baby Washu plays with a rabbit/kitten Ryo-ohki. Japanese names appear and vanish obscuring your vision of the delightful duo as a woman's singing voice is heard:

April roses, tiny sparrows,
Cornets bright and new
All belong together
With the myst'ry that is you
When I see your little face
I hear a song from long ago
I think you know
The many secrets I've forgotten

Generations through the ages
Joined as one somehow
Leading to the miracle
That I am holding now
From the sky and from the sea
Upon a breeze you came to me
You seem to see
A greater universe than I do

Sleep my baby, sleep my baby
Dream of somewhere far away
Do you remember still
How I hope you always will
Keep the mem'ry of the day
The world was born

When you wake up I'll be waiting
Eager for your smile
You've had quite a journey, Darling
You should rest a while
When you cry we still rejoice
To hear your voice - oh yes, it's true
My sweet Washu
Please understand how much we love you

Sleep my baby, sleep my baby
Later on perhaps you'll tell
The wondrous things you've seen
More miraculous than dreams
Tell me all about the day
The world was born

(Instrumental)

Sleep my baby, sleep my baby
Dream of somewhere far away
Do you remember still
How I hope you always will
Keep the mem'ry of the day
The world was born