Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.
More than Halfway
Two weeks had flown by since Kurt's audition.
When he went back into the auditorium it was with an air of confidence, thanks to Dave. He performed his song with all the passion and intensity as his impromptu solo performance of 'Rose's Turn' during his sophomore year.
When he finished his song—his last, sustained note reverberating in the air as he caught his breath—all three judges gave him a knowing look. They thanked him and let him know that he would be notified of the results in two weeks time.
He did not hear from Dave during those two weeks.
When Kurt exited the auditorium and was reunited with his family, Dave was nowhere to be seen. It was rather unfair of him; that he would kiss Dave when it seemed like only yesterday that he was telling Kurt how he felt about him. And for Kurt to practically patronize Dave, telling him that what he felt for him wasn't real? Kurt couldn't blame him for his speedy departure.
It wasn't until he was in the very back row of the Berry's van (as Rachel's parents thought it would be more fun if they made the trip together), pressed against the window in silence (with Rachel on his other side, singing show tunes with her dads, just happy to have finished with the audition process) that he realized he never told Dave of his current relationship status.
For all Dave knew, he was still with Blaine.
If that was the reason why Dave left in such a hurry, Kurt could understand why. But Dave couldn't be any more wrong.
Dave wasn't expecting the message he received from Kurt when he checked his email that day. The last time Dave saw him was when he was left, speechless, as Kurt slipped back into the auditorium after he kissed him. Dave didn't wait for Kurt to finish his audition and he was being sincere when he said that Kurt would blow them away. But as he drove back to Lima with his stereo as his only company, he couldn't shake the nagging guilt in the pit of his stomach.
Kurt had been the one to kiss him but he didn't try to do anything to stop him either. Dave wasn't about to drive a wedge between Kurt's relationship with his boyfriend. He already caused enough damage as it is, considering the whole Valentine's Day debacle. But on the other hand, Kurt said that nobody else came to Ohio State to wish him good luck. As Dave passed by the glass doors of the lobby that day, there was a glaringly absent individual amongst Kurt's family. Dave thought that Kurt would want his boyfriend to be there for moral support.
It wasn't as though Dave could blame Kurt for not contacting him for nearly two weeks. Well, he could, but Dave found it difficult to feel resentment for someone that he was still head over heels (he shuddered at the euphemism) in love with.
That was why Dave was still on his laptop with the cursor hovering over the email Kurt sent him.
What if it was an apology letter? Kurt could take it all back in an instant. "Sorry…" Dave imagined what was written in the email. "I wasn't thinking and I didn't mean it."
Dave's heart clenched painfully at the possibility. He screwed his eyes shut and dropped his head into his hands. He traced his bottom lip with his tongue, imagining how it felt when Kurt's lips touched his—not only for the second, but third time. He recalled the sweet taste of Kurt that managed to stay with him the entire, lonely drive back home after his departure.
Dave was broken from his reverie by a soft knock on his slightly ajar bedroom door, followed by the sound of it creaking open.
"Dave, I'm going to—Son, you alright?" Dave turned around in his seat to face the concerned visage of his father.
"Yeah, Dad. M'fine. Just thinking about school. What's were you saying?" Dave managed unconvincingly.
"I was going to go to the store to pick up a few things, but if you need me to stay…"
"No, Dad. I'm fine. I promise. Just checking my email." He motioned towards his laptop on his desk. It had taken quite some time on Paul Karofsky's part to be comfortable with leaving Dave home alone after the incident.
"Okay… Well, you call me if you can think of anything else we need at the store." Dave knew that there was a double meaning to the sentence. 'You call me if you need anything,' Dave imagined was what he truly meant. Dave nodded briefly and turned back around, hearing his father's footsteps as he made his descent down the stairs.
Dave looked back at the email. He decided that the contents would only plague him further if he just let it sit in his inbox. He clicked on the subject, titled a simple "Hello David", and picked at the skin on his thumb while he waited for it to pop up. As soon as he looked up, he breathed through the anxiety building in his chest, and read:
Thank you for being the one to believe in me when I couldn't.
P.S. I'll see you very soon.
P.P.S. Apparently they record the auditions.
Dave didn't know whether he should feel relieved or disappointed by the brevity of the letter. Knowing Kurt (and Dave liked to think he came to understand the inner workings of one Kurt Hummel's brain over the past couple of months), he expected a grandiose, MLA formatted letter. He was, however, somewhat confused by the second postscript. But as he looked above the message in the email, he saw an untitled attachment and hoped that, by opening it, it would clear some things up for him.
As the video player began to load, Dave shifted anxiously in his chair. As he leaned forward, resting his arms against the desk, his heart thrummed with excitement as the black screen shifted.
The video showed a lone figure standing in the middle of an empty stage. The post script suddenly made sense now.
Dave was completely enraptured with the screen. He watched the teen with the luminescent skin, positively glowing underneath the stage lights and looking positively at home. Dave couldn't help but smile at the new found light shining in the boy's determined eyes.
He was beautiful.
As a deep, reverberating piano introduction began playing through his laptop speakers, Dave couldn't help the niggling thought supplied to him by Kurt's short note. He was the one to put that fire back in his eyes. Nobody else.
Dave watched with rapt attention, mesmerized as Kurt took a determined step forward. He was staring dreamily—already lost in his performance even before he began singing.
Dave's breath caught as Kurt opened his mouth and the first smooth, silky notes that he articulated melded perfectly with the piano. Kurt moved around the stage like he owned it; as though every softly exhaled word was drawn up through his body from the wooden floor.
Dave attempted to slow his racing thoughts. He felt silly for paying more attention to how the song was sung, rather than what was being said.
"…my wildest dreaming could not foresee
Lying beside you, with you wanting me."
Dave suddenly felt as though somebody turned the temperature down a couple degrees… Or up, he really couldn't decide. The stifling heat accumulating around his collar was quite the antithesis to the chills running down his spine, causing goosebumps to spread out on his arms and legs
"…lost all resistance, and crossed some borderline."
The lyrics, the way Kurt stared out at some imagined audience made Dave feel incredibly significant in this incredibly vast universe.
"…got me seeing through different eyes."
Dave wasn't someone who got emotional very often. Okay, that was an obvious lie. But Dave knew that the song had to be a coincidence. Kurt must have decided on that song—wherever it was from—months before the actual audition. But the tears pricking the corners of his eyes were fairly adamant upon convincing him otherwise.
"…make up for lost time,
Say there's no future for us as a pair,
And though I may know,
I don't care…"
At this point, as the song was beginning to reach its crescendo, Dave gave a wet laugh and rubbed his eyes with the thumb and middle finger of his hand. It was so hard not to be affected by Kurt's voice. He was amazing. Dave knew he was biased, but Kurt was the most incredible thing he'd ever seen. He heard Kurt sing numerous times with the Glee Club, but this was different. He was actually able to watch him pour his heart out on stage and actually enjoy it without the fear of someone catching him staring for too long. His enjoyment was cut short, however, when he heard the tiny sniffle behind him.
Dave turned around to see the same boy standing there, leaning against his door frame, as the one on his screen. He got one look of his red eyes and watery smile and turned back to his laptop, frantically trying to exit out as Kurt's voice continued belting out in the background.
"…long as you're mine.
Come be how you want to
And see how bright we shine."
Eventually, Dave pressed the mute button and slammed his laptop screen shut. He turned shyly back to Kurt.
"I'm sorry. I was just…"
"Don't apologize," Kurt said in an amused voice. "I sent it to you, didn't I?"
Kurt addressed the unspoken question lingering in the air.
"I didn't mean to barge in like this. Your dad was just leaving when I arrived. He told me I could come up, if I wanted to."
"It's fine. I guess I wasn't expecting you to come by." Dave stood as Kurt began walking to the other side of the room. Dave noticed for the first time that Kurt had a piece of paper in his hand that was folded into thirds.
"What's that?" Dave asked as Kurt sat down in the arm chair in the corner of the room, crossing his legs neatly. Dave sat down opposite of him on his bed. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.
"Something I wanted to share with you." Kurt took a deep breath and held the paper out to him. Dave took the letter, unfolded it, and scanned the first line.
He didn't bother reading any futher. That single sentence told him all that he needed to know. Not that he didn't know based on his performance alone.
"I knew you'd get in," Dave said softly, giving Kurt a reassuring smile.
Kurt rubbed his arm somewhat guiltily.
"It seems like you had more faith in me than I did."
"I thought you'd be more excited."
"I think I'm afraid of getting my hopes up. Like I'll wake up tomorrow and all of this would just be a dream." He took a shuddering breath. "And then there's the fact that I'll be leaving this amazing guy behind."
Kurt turned his eyes to Dave as he simultaneously felt his heart sink.
"I'm sure… You and Blaine could still…" Kurt rolled his eyes.
"I'm not talking about Blaine, David. I'm talking about you." Dave frowned, despite the hopeful feeling of his heart pattering away in his throat.
"Me?" Dave croaked.
"Of course you." Kurt said this as if it was something they've already discussed. "I broke up with Blaine. Quite some time ago, actually."
Dave let that information sink in for a minute. He felt slightly guilty for assuming that much. He couldn't imagine Kurt as someone who would cheat on their partner, though, no matter who it was.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Kurt huffed a dry laugh.
"For a myriad of reasons," he divulged. "And all incredibly selfish." He set the NYADA acceptance letter on Dave's end table and stood up, making his way to Dave's bed and settled down next to him.
"For one? The last thing I wanted, from you of all people, was to be coddled for breaking up with Blaine." Dave turned and looked at Kurt questioningly, who had his head bowed and his hands folded in his lap.
"You're kind of nice like that, you know." Kurt nudged Dave softly with his elbow. "I wasn't upset about it, though. He'll always be my friend and I think we work better that way."
He paused before continuing. "I didn't want my break up to be a focus… Between us. I wanted to be your friend and help you… After all that had happened this year. I wanted to get to know this amazing person you've been hiding all this time."
Kurt slowly released his clasped hands and reached for Dave's, which was resting on his knee.
"And you want to know what happened then?" Kurt asked slowly watching Dave, who was examining their loosely intertwined fingers resting on his thigh.
"What?" Dave croaked. He slowly tore his eyes away from their hands to find Kurt smiling at him knowingly.
"I fell for him," Kurt said seriously. He blinked, but never dropped Dave's gaze.
Dave let out the breath he was holding. He continued to search Kurt's face, looking for some telltale sign that this was just some big practical joke. When he couldn't find one, he asked, "H-how long?"
Kurt laughed at Dave's horrible attempt at trying to keep the curiousity out of his voice.
"I don't know," Kurt answered honestly.
"It's been…" He screwed his eyes up, focusing on the corner of Dave's end table. When he found the answer he was looking for, he said to Dave in a measured voice, "Like water slowly filling up a balloon."
When Dave didn't say anything, Kurt continued.
"You know the water's there. You can feel it just underneath the thin membrane but… You can't see it. You can move it around and push it to the side but… It can't go anywhere. Eventually the balloon will burst—did burst. It's sort of hard to deny all the evidence when it's laying out in front of you… Or dripping from your hands."
"That's… really poetic."
"Shut up." Kurt nudged him again and looked away, suddenly shy.
"I think it was at OSU when I finally realized... Everything just fell into place. The more I learn about you, the more I don't to stop." Kurt looked down, rubbing at a little fading scar just below the first knuckle of Dave's thumb.
"What's this from?" Dave seemed surprised by the sudden change of subject. He looked down to where Kurt moved his own thumb away, revealing the slightly oblong slash of purplish skin no wider than a penny.
"Um… I was running late for school a couple days ago? I was in a rush and burnt myself while getting a bagel out of the toaster oven," Dave said this with an upward inflection, as though confused by the question and it's relevance to their conversation. Kurt only nodded, running his tongue along his plump lower lip. He traced it with his thumb again, as if it still pained Dave and he had the power to make it go away.
"You see… I don't want it to stop. These discoveries. No matter how insignificant they may be." The smile that at first seemed so big on Kurt's face went away.
"But I feel like I'm deluding myself," Kurt said sadly. "We only have a few months to spend time together before I leave but…" Kurt stopped and pulled his hand away from Dave's. Dave immediately yearned for Kurt's touch.
"God, what am I saying? Why would you still have feelings for me after how I treated you on Valentine's Day… Before you…" Kurt trailed off a pained look on his face. Kurt didn't have to finish the sentence. Dave knew exactly what he was referring to.
Kurt made to move away from him, but Dave finally came out of his daze caused by Kurt's confession and stopped him, tugging him back down by his sleeve. Kurt gave him a look of confusion mingled with hope.
"You think my feelings for you just… Went away?" He shrugged, "Like that?"
"I don't know. I guess. I was kind of… Demeaning, in retrospect." Dave scoffed.
"No, you weren't. Had I known you were still together I wouldn't have done any of that."
"You honestly didn't know, at the time?" Kurt seemed genuinely surprised. They never did have this conversation, despite the number of times they hung out together.
"The last time I saw you he was dancing with some dude at Scandals." Dave shrugged.
"I wouldn't want you to take any of it back," Kurt revealed.
Dave's eyebrow rose slightly, "No?"
Kurt shook his head looking up at Dave with a sort of restless desperation in his eyes.
"I just wanted to do something to make you happy. After all that I did… Even if you didn't know it was me, I just…" Dave paused.
"I am glad we did take the time to become friends first." Dave decided, smiling softly. Kurt returned the look.
"Yeah… You know, I built up this idea of you in my head that you were nothing short of perfect," Dave confessed. "You told me that I just thought I loved you… Like I was confused or something." Dave chuckled and lifted his hand, skittering his fingertips down the side of Kurt's face. Kurt blinked a few times, his eyes growing heavy at Dave's touch. "But the best part of becoming friends with you...? You pretty much confirmed how right I was."
Dave looked down for a moment, seeming as though he was at odds on a very important decision.
"You're not the only one who wasn't honest." Dave said in a hushed tone, watching his hand flatten against the curve of Kurt's cheek with a guilty look.
"What do you mean?"
Dave's heart, which was already beating pretty fast since Kurt showed up, began to pound faster.
"I got an acceptance letter a couple months ago…"
Kurt paused for a moment, narrowing his eyes slightly before asking, "Where?"
Dave dropped his hand from Kurt's face before he answered plainly.
Dave wasn't expecting the first blow.
Kurt shot up from his position on the bed—so fast that Dave was inclined to believe that there was a rocket was strapped to him—and delivered the punch to his shoulder.
It didn't hurt at all. Dave knew Kurt wasn't a violent person or someone who spent time at a punching bag. But the weak punch still surprised him.
"Hey! What the…? Kurt!" Dave ducked as Kurt reached over and grabbed one of his pillows, pummeling him over and over again in various places on his body.
"David. Karofsky. You. Insensitive. Jerk!" He said through gritted teeth as Dave crawled backwards on his bed, trying to get away from Kurt. He knew Kurt was upset, but that didn't mean he was in control of the laughter bubbling past his lips. It was hard to be intimdated by a goose feather pillow.
As Kurt followed Dave onto his bed he dropped the pillow, and, in an attempt to keep him there in order to interrogate him, he threw his leg over Dave and plopped down on midsection.
"Ow…" Dave whined, wiping at the tears that sprang to his eyes from the laughter. "I have vital organs in there, you know."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Kurt demanded with a pout. Dave looked up at him, admiring the faint blush on his pale cheeks while trying to push away the thought that Kurt was pretty much straddling him right now.
"Kurt…" Dave groaned.
"You were just gonna… What? Let me go off to New York and not tell me that we'd be going to schools a taxi cab ride away from each other?"
"There are a lot of people in New York. What would the chances be that you could actually pick my face out in a crowd?" Kurt didn't look amused. Dave sighed.
"I just… I wanted you to be happy, Kurt. I didn't want to make you feel obligated. Or to think I was going to New York in the hopes of wooing you. Especially now, considering that you won't be around your boyfriend—ex-boyfriend—anymore. Even if I had known about you and Blaine breaking up, I'd still want you to go off and become some famous performer and fall in love with someone."
Kurt stared at him with the same devastated expression on his face, like he could cry at any minute.
"You make it really hard to be mad at you. Especially when your reasons for lying are a lot less selfish than my own." Kurt ran his hands fondly over Dave's plain, grey cotton shirt covering his chest.
Dave shrugged and gave Kurt a self-deprecating smile, "What can you do?"
"I may not be in love with you, David..." Kurt began to say, not acknowledging the fact that Dave was already attempting to restore his walls... Like he had done so many other times to avoid getting hurt. But before he could leave any room for Dave to be heartbroken, Kurt gripped Dave's collar and added, "But I'm already more than halfway there."
Kurt tugged Dave up, crushing his lips to his. Dave didn't put in any effort whatsoever at suppressing his groan. Their lips melded together perfectly—as if their bodies were something more fluid than muscle and flesh.
"Kurt," Dave whispered into the silence of the bedroom as Kurt dragged his lips to Dave's jaw. The house was completely still apart from the monotonous whirr of the air conditioning system and the television his dad forgot to turn off when he left. The only thing that could be added to the sparse noise were their quick intakes of breath.
Dave pulled away as he attempted to sit up, craving even more contact with Kurt...With this wonderful, amazing, gorgeous guy who he harbored feelings for... And for the longest time. There was once a point in time where Dave was certain that he would never have a chance with Kurt. Hell, that notion seemed valid up until about an hour ago. But now he had Kurt; and Kurt wasn't going anywhere.
Kurt had long since let go of the twist of fabric at Dave's neck and was now holding his face in his lithe fingers like he was the only thing important in the world. Dave started slightly, not expecting the slick, velvety feel of Kurt's tongue gliding against his. He gasped, only allowing Kurt further access. With Dave's mouth gaping wantonly, Kurt took the opportunity to flick his tongue languorously against the sensitive roof of Dave's mouth.
Dave made himself vertical, stretching his legs out before him. When Kurt slid further into his lap, Dave was able to fully appreciate the tangible warmth of Kurt's chest pressing against his.
Dave pulled away, regretfully, but only this time for both of them to catch their breath. Dave stared at Kurt's swollen, red lips, clutching at his slim waist and wondering when Kurt's hands found their way into the short strands of his hair.
"Everything okay?" Kurt said, nuzzling his nose alongside Dave's.
"I think I'm afraid of getting my hopes up." Dave recalled Kurt saying. He knew Kurt was leaning back to examine him fully, even though his eyes were still closed. He reveled in the feel of Kurt's fingernails scratching lightly at the base of his skull. Dave smiled slyly at Kurt through half-lidded eyes. "Like I'll wake up tomorrow and all of this would just be a dream."
"You're not getting rid of me that easily," Kurt hummed, kissing Dave lightly on the lips lingering there slightly before pulling away. "We have New York to look forward to."
New York… The rest of their lives... Away from this small town, full of small-minded people. It was a fresh start and a guarantee of more time to woo the man he loved. Dave sighed.
He liked the sound of that.
Kurt's audition song is "As Long As You're Mine" from Wicked.
I'm pretty sure me seeing Wicked for the first time ever (not counting all of the youtube videos I devoured since I started watching Glee) a couple weeks ago inspired me to write this little two-shot. I hoped you enjoyed it.