Wow, I cannot believe I am at 61 chapters already! It's been crazy and you all make it better with your support. Now, shall we get going on bringing Castiel and Dean back together? I think we should.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Please excuse spelling and grammar mistakes.
. . .
Chapter 61: The Break-Up 2:
"Dean, seriously it's been over a month," Sam blurted out as they drove down the dark road in the Impala. He was sick of seeing his brother the way he was at the moment and for the last month. He had become just a shell of the Dean he remembered. This Dean had gone back to being cold and emotionless and it was scaring the Hell outta' Sam.
Dean darted his eyes to his brother "What are you babbling on about?" he asked, knowing very well what Sam was referring to. It had been exactly 38 days since Dean last saw Castiel…not that he was counting. He definitely wasn't counting nor did he care…nope.
Sam gave him a bitchface "You know what I'm talking about. You need to call him, Dean. You can't avoid each other forever."
"We aren't talking about this," Dean said flatly, moving his hand to the stereo. He moved his fingers to the volume nob and twisted it so Led Zeppelin blared over their voices.
Sam sighed and brushed a hand through his hair before staring out the window to the darkened trees that whizzed by. He needed to figure out a way to get Dean and Castiel back together. They were perfect for each other except for the fact that they both believed they had the right in the situation. Sam had heard everything Castiel and Dean said in the parking lot that day and yeah, it was harsh what Castiel said to Dean but Dean also needed to think about how Castiel would feel with all the flirting with random women. He would just have to call Gabe and ask his opinion.
. . .
Castiel just stared ahead blankly as the angels he was training were practicing battle with each other. That's exactly what angels were…from the start, all they were meant for was fighting and serving. They weren't meant to fall in love with humans. He should have accepted that reality before getting so close with Dean. He knew it was wrong and angels were not meant to do that.
"Cassie!" Balthazar's voice called over the young angels shouting.
Castiel turned to his friend, who was walking over and smiling up at the angels who were twisting and turning through the air with fake blades in their hands.
"Hello Balthazar," Castiel said, giving his friend and attempt at a smile.
Balthazar stopped and arched an eyebrow "Was that supposed to be a friendly smile or 'I'm gonna stab you with an angel blade' smile?" he had a grin on his face.
Castiel frowned. Of course that would be brought up. Maybe he was just a crappy angel. That was the entire reason he was doing this training at the moment. He had killed dozens of his own brothers and sisters, including Balthazar who was his best friend.
"Aw Cas, I didn't mean anything by it," Balthazar said, quickly realizing his mistake. Castiel had been so quick to think negative of everything anyone said to him since the breakup with his little Deano. Balthazar didn't know the details, nobody would tell him. He placed a hand on his friends shoulder "You need to lighten up. Please Castiel, I can't stand to see you like this."
Castiel turned pained sapphire eyes to him "I don't know what you're talking about…I'm perfectly fine."
"If you don't tell what on Earth happened between you and Dean, I'm going to have to resort to other ways of figuring it out," Balthazar warned.
"Hey! Hayyel stop that!" Castiel shouted when one of the angels threw a legitimate burst of white energy into another angel, who tumbled back, yelping out in anguish.
Hayyel stopped in flight and stuck turned those yellow-green eyes to his teacher. He frowned "I'm sorry, Castiel," he said "I lost control."
"Don't do it again. This is just training. You aren't supposed to hurt each other," Castiel said firmly.
"Didn't you kill a bunch of other angels…wouldn't that make you a hypocrite?" another young angel asked.
Castiel felt that pang as they hit that sore spot. It became silent as all of the young angels listened for a response.
Balthazar saw the distress of his friend "Castiel, I'll take the rest of the lesson. You go to Dean and if you two aren't wing kinking it by the end of the day, I swear I'm going to take him."
Castiel darkened his eyes "You wouldn't" he said.
Balthazar lifted his eyebrows "As far as I can tell, Dean is free game at the moment," he knew he was probably going to get lashed by Castiel for that but the angel needed to hear it.
Castiel sighed, knowing Balthazar would never do it but he had a point. He smiled at his friend "Thank you, Balthazar," he said.
Balthazar nodded "Now get out of here."
Castiel gave the angels another look before taking off. He needed a place where he could think and he knew of the exact building where he could be alone.
. . .
Castiel landed softly inside the barn where the walls and floor were covered in a graffiti of sigils and wards and traps. Small shards of glass still coated the floor from when he blew all of the lights out upon entering. The tables still sat in the back though now they were void of weapons. He took a deep breath before sitting down on one of the tables.
. . .
Dean let out a snarling sound as he swung the machete across the throat of the vampire in front of him. He watched as the head slipped off and fell onto the floor, rolling before the body toppled over with a sickening thud.
Sam stared with widened eyes as his brother went all Van Helsing on the vampire nest. Sam didn't even have a moment to get in a kill because his brother just wouldn't stop. It was like he was enjoying it a little too much.
Once the last vampire was taken out, Dean walked out of the building without a word. He stopped at the Impala and opened the trunk. He took a deep breath as he stared at the assortment of weapons. He grabbed a cloth and cleaned the blood from the blade in his hand and settled it back into its place. He then wiped the blood from his face. He stopped and stared at the corner of the trunk where he used to keep that stupid, ugly tan trench coat that he hated and loved all at once. The painful memory reformed in his mind of watching Castiel walk into that reservoir with only the trench coat coming back.
"Dean?" Sam asked, alarmed at his brother's blank look.
Dean snapped back and turned to Sam "Yeah, let's go. I need to get to the bar," he said.
Sam nodded, not wanting to press on the subject too much. He figured while Dean was at the bar, he would go and talk to Gabriel.
. . .
"Oh my moosey, it's been too long," Gabriel said as he flopped onto the bed on top of Sam. His golden wings unfurled, covering them like a blanket.
Sam smiled as the wondrous feeling of tingling euphoria seeped through each place the feathers touched his revealed skin. He began to run his fingers through the silky feathers, earning a muffled moan from Gabriel, whose face was pressed against Sam's chest.
He did that for a few minutes, just relishing in the feeling of the angel he adored so much and it made his stomach turn to even think about losing Gabriel. He couldn't imagine what Dean was going through…Dean's bond with Castiel was much stronger than the one Sam had with Gabriel.
"What's wrong?" Gabriel asked, lifting his head up to stare at the hunter's face.
Sam sighed "Dean isn't doing good at all. I'm really worried. This is lasting a lot longer than I thought it would."
Gabriel frowned. He had been thinking the same thing. He had figured Dean and Castiel would make up in a few days after their fight…a week at the most but it had been over a month and neither one of them were making the attempt to fix it.
"So we have to do something if they won't," Gabriel said, running a hand over Sam's cheek. He, himself, could never find it in himself to leave Sam. He would go insane.
"Have you spoken with Cas lately?" Sam asked curiously.
Gabriel nodded "He doesn't talk much anymore."
"Well, Dean is at the bar at the moment and he is probably going to do something stupid," Sam said, knowing his brother very well.
"Then let's go to the bar," Gabriel said simply with a smirk "After some wing massaging though."
Sam laughed when those feathers slid up his shirt.
. . .
Dean gulped down three shots of whiskey in a row. This had become ritual for him. After each hunt, he would go to the bar and drink himself silly. He really didn't want that stupid fight to change him. No, he was going to go on as if nothing happened…or try at least.
"You need anything else?" the pretty bartender asked. She had long, straight light blonde hair and way too much make up. She wore a very revealing tank top and a skin tight mini skirt. All in all, she just looked like a whore. And she was hitting on Dean like the world was going to end tomorrow.
Dean was about to speak but was interrupted by another voice. One he hadn't heard in a while and one he really didn't want to hear at the moment.
"Get him three more of those and get me some scotch, sweetheart," Balthazar said as he cozied himself in the stool beside Dean.
The bartender – Ally – lifted her eyebrows as though confused to his presence. She hadn't seen him enter. She smiled and nodded, now turning her attention to the angel with the low v-cut stop and fitted blue jeans.
Dean sighed "What are you doing here?" he asked, knowing the feeling of being buzzed. His tolerance had grown in the past month but he probably had drank about an entire bottle already.
"You seen Cassie?" Balthazar asked, smiling white teeth at Ally, who placed their drinks down, her cheeks flushing red with blush.
Dean felt a pang at hearing that name. He had finally managed to get that blue eyed, black winged angel off of his mind and now all he could think about was the angel. He composed himself and turned back to Balthazar "No I haven't. Don't know if you heard or not but Cas and I are over."
Balthazar arched an eyebrow, suddenly wary of the fact Castiel hadn't come to make it up to Dean as he ordered. Balthazar wasn't one to go back on his word. He knew just a little hitting on Dean and Castiel would show up. He didn't want to have to go in that direction but he realized he was going to have to.
Balthazar sipped from his scotch and took a deep breath as he allowed his wings to unfurl. Glimmering blue and yellow seemed to shine in the darkened bar as he let the feathers graze over Dean's forearm before allowing them to lay down his sides.
Dean shivered involuntarily at the feeling of the tingling feathers on his skin. It had been so long since he was able to touch wings and he was so addicted to the feeling. He stared at the wings for a long moment, trying to fight the urge to touch them. He let out a slow breath and turned to his drinks. He swallowed all three shots down, flipping the glasses upside down in the process. His head spun with a new wave of tipsy.
Balthazar watched Dean's eyes on his wings. He knew Dean wouldn't do anything with Balthazar physically and he was more than fine with that but he knew Dean wouldn't be able to resist wings after being away from them for so long. He was just waiting for the hunter to touch them…not just for his benefit but also because Castiel seemed to have some kind of 'Dean is touching another angel's wings' sense. He smirked to himself as he took another small sip at his drink.
"Again, I ask. Why are you here?" Dean questioned, his eyes turning to those wings again. The feathers were twitching and slowly moving towards Dean. He nonchalantly let his hand fall from the counter and down to his side. He could feel his fingers grazing the feathers just gently and it sent a rush through him. He wanted to see those ebony colored wings once more. He bit down on his lip as he turned his attention back to the bar as though it were the most interesting thing in the world.
Balthazar grinned when he felt Dean try to be smooth about the wing touching. He figured he would make it a little harder to resist. He sighed and let one of his wings spread wide and lay upon Dean's shoulders.
Dean stiffened at all of the vibes and he turned wide emerald eyes to Balthazar "What the hell are you thinking?" he asked.
Balthazar just pursed his lips "I'm just using your shoulders as a wing-rest. Got a problem?"
Dean wanted to say something like 'Castiel wouldn't like that very much' but he remembered that Castiel didn't give a damn about him. Instead he just shook his head and allowed one of his hands to curl around the tips of the feathers around his shoulders.
Balthazar let out a soft breath at the feeling. It was just so pleasant. He really needed a human to touch his wings. He turned to Ally "Two whiskeys please," he said.
Dean rolled his eyes and accepted the drink once they were brought over.
. . .
"Are you seeing this too or have I just lost my mine?" Gabriel asked as him and Sam took a seat in the very back of the bar. Their eyes were on Dean and Balthazar's backs, watching the wing over Dean's shoulders and his hand in the feathers.
"What is he doing? Castiel's gonna' kill him again," Sam said, confused about everything "Is he trying get Dean?"
Gabriel knit his eyebrows in concentration. He knew Balthazar didn't want Dean like that so he had another motive and if that motive was what Gabriel was thinking than Balthazar was a genius.
"I think he is doing that with Dean to get Castiel's attention…so Cas will actually show up. Great idea but not so smart considering the reason Dean and Castiel broke up was from jealousy," Gabriel said.
"So you think Cas will show up all pissed off and jealous and make it worse?" Sam asked worriedly "Should we go and stop it?"
"Don't," Castiel's voice sounded "I want to see what he does."
Sam jumped in his seat as he turned his eyes to the blue-eyed angel who was staring at Dean and Balthazar.
"Castiel…you sneaky little angel," Gabriel said "You know spying isn't a good thing to do, either."
Castiel ignored him and sat down beside them. His grace coiled with the desire to rip a few feathers out of Balthazar but he did get that warning and he wanted to learn self control. Castiel decided he didn't deserve Dean…he said so many horrible things to the hunter and he did so many dreadful things he could never take back; if Dean wanted to be with someone else than he had the right to.
"I have an idea," Gabriel said, eyes lighting.
Castiel and Sam turned to him "What would that be?" Castiel questioned.
"Go and flirt with someone in front of Dean," Gabriel said "So he will know why you get jealous."
Castiel stared darkly at him "I don't want to 'flirt' with anyone."
"Do it anyways," Gabriel said.
"No," Castiel said flatly.
"That's actually a really good idea," Sam added.
. . .
"So what do you say we go in that back room?" Ally suddenly asked Dean.
Dean lifted his eyebrows at the invitation "Um…" his drunken mind even thought that was cheap and disgusting. He shook his head.
"What about a threesome?" Balthazar suggested with a smooth grin. He tightened his wing around Dean. He knew Castiel was watching them…he wasn't stupid. He was just wondering why he hadn't gotten his feathers torn to shreds by the angel yet.
Dean glared at Balthazar "You're sick," he said "I'd never do that."
"You have made out with me before though," Balthazar pointed out "In the hot tub that one night."
Dean felt his stomach turn as he remembered that. Ally's eyes widened as she pictured the two men in front of her in the hot tub together.
"I-I was drunk," Dean said.
"As you are now," Balthazar pointed out.
Dean felt sick when he realized that. Now he understood why Castiel was so snappy when he flirted. Dean gave him reason not to trust him…so he really was out of line. Castiel was right…Dean was too pathetic of a human for someone as good as Castiel.
Balthazar watched Dean's reaction, knowing he hit a sore spot. He swore the hunter was about to cry. He smoothly moved an arm towards Dean, placing it comfortingly on his shoulder "If you and Cas aren't together anymore, there's nobody to stop us," he felt gross just saying it. He had the feeling it was working though. Dean was going to feel guilty and try and make it up to Castiel.
Dean glared daggers at Balthazar "I don't want to do anything with you," he snapped, shoving the hand roughly away from him. He moved to his feet, pushing Balthazar's wings harshly away from him "You're so screwed up. I wouldn't do that to Cas."
Balthazar tried to look offended when he was really just relieved from the reaction. He managed a glance behind him to where Castiel, Sam and Gabriel were watching the scene. He turned back to Dean, who slammed money onto the table before grabbing his jacket and storming out of the building.
. . .
Castiel watched as Balthazar tried to make a move on Dean and oh it took every ounce of self control not to snap his fingers and destroy the angel but as he told himself, Dean could have whoever he wanted. He just prayed Dean wouldn't choose Balthazar over him. He lifted his eyebrows when Dean shoved Balthazar away, his eyes lit with fury as he said something. He then stormed out of the bar.
"Go," Gabriel said, shoving Castiel, who was just standing there.
"He doesn't want to see me," Castiel said, frowning. He wanted to comfort Dean but he knew the hunter didn't need him.
Balthazar walked over and flinched when Castiel's eyes narrowed at him.
"Hey don't give me that look. I was just trying to snap Dean to his senses," Balthazar said "He clearly still wants you and only you."
Castiel thought about that. It didn't make any sense. He pretty much called Dean a worthless human…he didn't mean it and he would do anything to take it back but he was afraid of rejection.
. . .
Dean tried to throw up the wall again and hide his emotions but it was crumbled to bits as he thought about the reason Castiel always acted that way. He didn't trust him…he would do anything to gain that trust back but it was hopeless. Castiel was an angel – archangel – of the Lord. He could have anyone and anything he wanted. Why would he waste his time with a broken human who tortured souls in Hell? He pressed his lips together as his drunken mind tried to comprehend the winding road he was speeding through. Damn he drove drunk a lot but this time, with everything else on his mind, he knew it was stupid and reckless. He swerved just in time to miss a car while trying to switch lanes.
He was going to get pulled over and then he would have the cops on his ass as well as everything else. Screw it; he drove on, slowing down when he realized his gas tank was on E and the Impala started shuddering as she tried to use fumes to move on. He sighed in frustration as he pulled into the gas station just across the street.
What was Balthazar even thinking…trying to make moves on him like that? It was so screwed up…and Cas didn't even show up to try and stop it. Did Castiel even care anymore? He felt ice shoot through his veins at the thought. He was glad he made it to the pump. A quarter mile later, the car probably would have shut down completely.
So he sat in his baby for a moment, listening to Simple Man as it sounded through the speakers. He ran a hand down his face then moved it to the mark over his shoulder. His heart clenched painfully when it was barely even noticeable anymore. The day he and Castiel fought, it turned almost black and from then on it just began to dissipate. Now nobody would even be able to notice it if they didn't know it was there.
With a heavy sigh, he pulled himself drunkenly from the car and walked towards the front of the little market. Once he walked inside, he gazed around at the brightly lit area filled with aisles of candies and chips and car needs and toiletries. Coffee machines were set up with a variety of little creamer cups and sugar. His eyes moved towards the coolers lined along the walls. He stumbled over to them after giving the elderly white bearded man behind the counter a smile.
He stared at the alcohol then to the water. He didn't know which one he wanted more. After a moment, he grabbed a bottle of water then walked to an aisle to grab some aspirin. Take care of the hangover before it happened. He froze when he heard the bell ding of someone entering and then the sound of a weapon being readied.
Oh hell no this was not happening while he was in the store. He spun around to see a man wearing all black and a ski mask. He was holding a pistol up at the elderly man. Dean noticed the way the robber's hands were shaking. He had never done anything like this and he definitely never shot a person before.
Dean's thoughts were debating. His drunken mind wanted to beat the hell outta the man and shoot him with his own gun and his logical mind just wanted to disarm him then hold him down until the police came…but again, that would involve police.
"Give me all of your money or I swear I will shoot you!" the masked man shouted, his voice cracking with Dean noticed was fear.
The old man's grey eyes were widened as he held up his arms. He slowly went to move to the register but the masked man shouted again, causing the elderly man to jump and hold his hand over his chest. This guy was going to have a heart attack and Dean was just going to stand back and watch. Screw that.
"Drop the weapon, buddy," Dean suddenly said, placing his items on the table where the coffee was.
The masked man spun around, pointing the gun at Dean now.
Dean held up his hands "Do you even know how to use that thing?" he asked.
Through the holes for the eyes, Dean could see terrified brown irises.
"Just look at you…your more afraid than any of us in here. Just drop the weapon and let the cops take you quietly," Dean said slowly, moving his hands back down. He took a step towards the masked man.
"Don't move," the masked man shouted. He left the gun still pointed at Dean while beckoning for the old man to fill the bag with money.
Dean decided to take that moment to disarm him…though he didn't realize just how uncoordinated he was. As he tried to kick the gun from the masked man's hand, his other foot slid from beneath him and he fell onto his back with a sickening crack.
The masked man, alarmed at the sudden movement and afraid for his safety shot the gun directly into Dean's chest. And for a man who had never shot someone before, he hit Dean spot on in the heart.
Dean felt his entire body ignite with ice for an instant as he comprehended what just happened. A moment later, he felt every ounce of life leave his body.
. . .
I totally didn't mean to do that…I had this whole chapter mapped out in my head and while I wrote it, it changed on me! O.O. I'm sorry!
Please review! All of your reviews have been inspiration! You all rock! Let me know what you think of this chapter because I'm not sure how I feel about it…I feel like an evil, twisted person for doing that to Dean…but that just gives Castiel a chance to save him and bring him back and rebuild their bond again. *wink*wink*