This is my latest story and consists of three parts. The two parts will be posted once they are done being beta'd and I have had the chance to get through them. I hope you enjoy it. I have to point out that this story is rated NC-17, so if you want to read the entire uncut version then please go to my website: deepinmysoul .net if the website doesn't work you can visit my live journal at asheridan. livejournal .com.
Dean and Sam stormed into the cabin, guns ready. A tip had led them to this cabin where a witch would be hiding. They had found out that this witch uses Dark Magic against anyone who mistreated her. It was always different spells, which made it harder to track. There was this one girl who kept hitting herself when she lied. Since she was the queen of lying, she was black and blue. Another girl kept ripping her hair out when she did something she wasn't supposed to; when she had ripped out all the hair on her head she had moved to the hair on her arms and legs. It was a weird sight, Dean remembered.
At first, both brothers just thought she was mad; they hadn't suspected this to be a curse. It wasn't until they met a man who kept cutting himself when he was just looking at a woman, even when he was merrily looking at her when he talked to her, that they decided it could be magic.
Sam had gone to the local library, while Dean had gone to enjoy the sights or the bar with the cute waitresses. The younger Winchester found out that a hundred years ago, a family of witches lived in this town and who still had some descendets alive to this day. When they had gone to investigate they found all kinds of weird stuff, satanic symbols, cut up pieces of different animals and a lot of potions that smelled just plain awful.
As luck was never on the Winchesters' side, they didn't find the woman who lived there. It wasn't until they were at the bar that they overheard someone say: "The witch is at her cabin." Figuring it was their only shot, the brothers investigated and found out where the cabin was.
They decided to go at night so that they had the cover of darkness. Once they arrived they took out a gun and Ruby's knife. Looking around and finding more satanic symbols they knew they were at the right address. Other than the single (overcrowded) table and chair on their right, the room looked empty. It wasn't until they took a step inside that they saw the young woman hiding in the corner, with her back towards them, whispering things they couldn't hear; obviously she had heard them coming and was muttering a spell to protect herself.
Motioning with his gun, Dean told his brother to advance on her. Slowly they walked over to her; it wasn't until they got into earshot that Sam heard what she was mumbling.
"Dean, we have to get out of here," he told his brother, understanding the witch was placing a terrible curse on them. He wasn't sure what type of curse it was but he could clearly make out 'excruciating pain', 'male', 'cabin', and that didn't sound pleasant at all. Not for the males in the cabin at least.
One shared look with his brother told Dean to go. Quickly they made their way towards the door but kept glancing back in case the witch would use blunt force. "Never turn your back on a threat," both brothers could still hear their father's voice yelling at them.
Luckily, Sam was out of the cabin; the curse would not get him. Dean, however, wasn't so lucky. An invisible shield held him back inside. The door seemed barred as well as the windows. He shot his brother an alarmed look through the open door just before he pointed the gun at the witch and pulled the trigger. The witch fell to the ground but didn't stop mumbling the incantation; it was clearly more painful for her but that didn't seem to stop her.
As a last resort, Dean pulled out Ruby's knife and advanced on the dying woman, ready to take her life so the curse wouldn't get him. An overwhelming pain shot through him as he took another and another step towards the witch but he didn't give up. He fought his way towards the woman; every step hurt more then the others but through his struggles, he reached her and stabbed the woman in the chest, killing her in an instant.
Unfortunately, the curse didn't end with the witch and as the pain became more and more unbearable, Dean fell to the ground, letting the knife slip from his fingers trying his hardest not to scream out at the pain.
Sam rushed to his side but Dean didn't hear him; the pain was even worse than the torture he had endured in Hell. It was so unbearable he could hardly breath; it felt as if spiders were crawling under his skin while taking small bites out of him, and his whole body felt as if it was on fire. The pain became much worse when his brother touched his arm, trying to help him up. It felt as if his touch burned a hole into his body.
"I have to get you out of here," Sam told his brother when Dean tried to get away from him, shaking his head.
"No," he mumbled, took off his jacket, and showed Sam the wound he had inflicted. There, on his arm was a burn mark where his brother's fingers had curled around his arm. "It hurts," the older Winchester gasped out, before closing his eyes not wanting his brother to see how much it actually hurt. He never liked feeling weak especially not in front of his younger brother. Dean was the oldest, he was suppose to take care of his younger sibling not the other way around.
He wasn't prepared for the overload of pain that rushed throughout his whole body when he tried to stand up and fell back to the floor while releasing the most horrifying scream Sam had ever heard from his brother.
The pain became worse where ever he touched something. His back burned as it touched the floor, but he couldn't stand up; his knees still hurt like a motherf-er from when he tried to stand. There wasn't a thing he could do to get away from the pain. Touching the floor hurt, and unfortunately there was something called gravity, he would need to touch the floor in order to get away from there.
Sam watched his brother helplessly as he decided what to do. The flapping of wings shot relief through him, for he was certain Castiel would know what to do...or at least he hoped so, for he had no clue what so ever. "Cas, help him," he only said when he turned to face the angel.
"I'll try," was the only thing he said as he took a step closer to the hurting hunter. "The curse is strong," he said after cocking his head something, Sam noted, he always did when he was thinking things through. "I'm not sure how to break this without the witch's help."
"So what? We do research while Dean is hurting?" Sam was angry at the angel. Why wasn't he able to help his brother? After everything he and Dean had done for the angel, he still wouldn't help them?
"The curse is beyond my skill to remove. If I attempt to help Dean then he would either be in more pain or die." Castiel took a step towards the younger Winchester. "Do you want your brother to die Sam?"
"No," Sam whispered, He didn't want to lose his brother again. "What do we do now?
Castiel took a good look at Dean before making his decision. He walked over to the hunter and kneeled down so he could lay his hand on the hunter's shoulder, right over the mark he had left when pulling him out of Hell.
Dean was afraid the touch would hurt him, seeing how much his brother's touch had hurt him, but fortunately it was comforting and unconsciously leaned into the touch.
"It seems as if my touch doesn't hurt him," Castiel observed. "Though I'm not sure why."
"Maybe it's because you're an angel," Sam noted as he watched his brother trying to skip away from the pain.
Castiel didn't reply but watched Dean as he made his decision. "We need to figure out what the curse is so we can help your brother I'll take him to the motel and find a way to lessen his pain."
"Okay, I'll go to the library and see if I can find anything." Sam wasn't comfortable with leaving his brother with the angel but he also couldn't helplessly watch his brother be in pain. If the angel's touch didn't hurt him then it was the most logical choice that he was there with his brother instead of him. "I'll see you back at the motel," he said before walking out of the cabin and towards the Impala. He figured the angel wasn't going to use the car so he would be able to use it.
Castiel looked at Dean as he decided what would be best for him when the hunter's voice shook him out of his thoughts. "Cas, hurts," he gasped out and rolled onto his side to relief his back. But that too became unbearable and changed to his other side. When the pain became too much he rolled back to his other side. He started rolling back and forth until the angel made a decision.
Castiel lowered himself down so he was able to pick the hunter up and stood back up. The hunter sighed in relief when the pain went away, and actually, cuddled closer to the angel. When he was better he was going to deny he'd cuddled up to Castiel, but for now, the relief of having no pain was much better than being modest.
The curse was a strange one indeed, Castiel thought as he flew the both of them to the motel. Any touch would hurt the hunter except for the angel's. Was it because he was an angel, or was it something else?
The angel stood in the middle of the motel room, carrying Dean bridal style as he pondered the curse. He hadn't been there when the curse had been spoken, so he had no idea what the curse was. It was a strange one indeed; it was almost personal. To hurt someone this muc, seemed personal to the angel. But why?
The Winchester brothers had only been on this hunt for a few days, had never met the witch before. How come it was personal?
"Uhm, Cas." Dean's voice brought him out of his musings again, and he lowered his head to look at the hunter in his arms. "Could you sit down; this is becoming way uncomfortable."
Castiel blinked, before doing as the hunter requested and sat down on the bed. Dean let out a scream when his feet came into contact with the bed.
"Shit, shit, shit," he said as the burning feeling became even worse than before. Immediately Castiel changed Dean's position and had his back rest against his chest and made sure his legs were only touching his own.
"Sure, like this isn't uncomfortable," Dean muttered sarcastically.
"How do you want to do this then, Dean?" Castiel asked. "Whenever you touch something besides me you are hurting. I'm not sure what you want me to do."
Dean sighed and turned his head so he could look at his angel, their faces inches away from each other. "I don't know, Cas," he replied. "This just sucks, you know? I'm not sure what to do either. I just hope Sammy will not barge in and see me sitting in a guy's lap. I'll never hear the end of it..." He tried to joke but failed as both, hunter and angel, knew how serious their current situation was.
"Sam is at the library; I don't think he'll be back soon," Castiel observed.
"You're right, he'll spend hours there. He just loves homework," Dean replied with a snort. Sammy and his research. Yeah, that'll take hours.
The hunter tried to relax against the angel but couldn't help but feel uncomfortable because, really, he was sitting in the lap of an angel and was actually enjoying it. He was surely going back to hell for this. Not that he would ever admit it out loud that he had a thing for Castiel, but that didn't stop him from thinking about it. He just hoped that the angel wasn't reading his mind like he used to.
He was just getting comfortable when his feet started to hurt annoyed he kicked his shoes off but that didn't seem to make a difference. Suddenly, his entire body was on fire again. "Shit, I thought it didn't hurt when you touched me!" Dean yelled as he stood up and tried to get away from the burning feeling.
Castiel stood up as well and cocked his head. "Your clothes are hurting you," he realized.
The hunter immediately removed one of his socks while balancing on his other foot. Sure enough his left wasn't hurting anymore. That was until he put his foot down. "Christ!" he let out and was grateful when Castiel picked him up again. Although he was still hurting all over, the pain of standing on his exposed foot was even worse than his clothes.
The angel helped him out of his remaining clothes till Dean was down to his boxers. "No," he said when Castiel tried to remove them.
"Dean, they are hurting you," Castiel noted as he saw the discomfort in the hunter's eyes.
"I just, I'm not comfortable getting naked with a dude," Dean admitted between the pain because "holy fuck" his private parts were starting to hurt more and more.
"Dean, I will not have you in pain." With one swift movement the boxers were removed, leaving Dean as naked as the day he was born. Immediately the angel picked the hunter back up, removing him from anything that could hurt him and Dean sighed in relief once more as the pain went away.
"This sucks," Dean mumbled. "No this worse than sucks," he continued. "If that bitch wasn't already dead I'd kill her again."
Castiel agreed silently; he had seen the corpse of the witch and would have killed her himself for hurting his hunter so had she still been alive.
"Hey, why don't your clothes hurt?" Dean asked after a moment of silence.
"I'm not certain," Castiel admitted. "As I'm not certain why I don't seem to hurt you. Maybe it is as Sam suggested. Because I'm an angel and the clothes are not hurting you because I wear them."
Dean thought about what Castiel said and shrugged. "Could be, currently I don't care. As long as they don't hurt me I'm good."
Castiel raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure?" This was weird behavior for Dean. He usually wanted to know what was going on.
"Actually, I think we should try something," Dean continued, not answering Castiel's question.
"Try what?" Castiel was a little suspicious as he always was of Dean's motives but that didn't mean he wasn't curious.
"Remove your trench coat," Dean ordered and waited until Castiel removed the jacket. "Give it to me."
Castiel handed the coat over to the hunter and watched as he was about to wrap it around his shoulders when his face scrunched up in pain and he let the coat fall down trying to get away from it. Obviously it was hurting him.
"Shit, that hurt," Dean let out a raspy breath. "Guess that didn't work."
"You were trying to see if my clothes hurt you," Castiel observed, understanding what Dean had been trying to do.
"Yes, featherhead, of course I was," Dean replied sarcastically. He had hoped the trench coat wouldn't hurt so he would be able to cover himself up. It wasn't as if he was ashamed of his body but he wasn't liking the fact he was so exposed. "I guess it only works when you're wearing it..."
Dean sounded defeated to Castiel and he prayed to his father that there was something more he could do for his hunter.
"I hope Sam finds a cure soon," Dean muttered as he relaxed back against the angel. He was tired but wasn't sure he'd be able to fall asleep like this.
"You should sleep," Castiel said. "I'll make sure you don't move too much."
"Thanks, Cas, but I'm not so certain I'll be able to fall asleep." Dean smiled up at the angel but lay back just in case. Closing his eyes, he tried to remember what the witch had babbled when she cast the curse. His Latin wasn't as good as his brother's but he'd caught a few words. 'Pain' was one of them. Mentally he snorted; pain was a understatement. This was much, much, worser than 'pain'. There weren't any words to describe just how much it hurt when something was touching him. It was weird that just a piece of clothing could hurt him so much. He should be grateful that Castiel was there with him. He didn't want to think about how he would be feeling had the angel not been there.
His eyelids started to drop and he felt the pull of the darkness; gratefully he let himself slip away.
It was an hour or two later when Dean woke up with a scream as pain shot first through his left leg and then his right. Immediately he was lifted from the bed and placed back onto something solid but soft. Cas, his mind supplied for him. He took a few deep breaths, trying to calm his beating heart down. "Shit," he said after a few minutes. "I never want to wake up like that again."
"I'm sorry Dean," Castiel said from under him. "I wasn't able to secure you as well as I thought. You move around a lot whilst you're sleeping."
"Shit, Cas, it's okay," Dean said and lifted himself up onto his elbows. He noted that Castiel had lay down onto the bed with him on top of the angel. They were now face to face, the trench coat spread over the bed as far as it would reach. His own knees were lying on them but his feet were on top of Castiel; the trench coat didn't go all the way down so the angel had placed him like that so he wouldn't be in any pain while he slept.
"You kept moving and moaning as if you were in pain but I made certain you were not touching anything else but me. I don't know why you were in pain," Castiel explained.
"You didn't see my dreams?" Dean asked, realizing that he must have dreamt about having sex but he wasn't able to remember his dream. Then it dawned on him what he must have been doing, and God forbid, felt a blush coming up. He must have had the starting of a wet dream and moved against Castiel to release some pressure...
"No, I was a little busy trying to keep you from moving and I didn't have the time to see into your dreams," Castiel replied a little bit annoyed. He may be an angel but he wasn't able to do multiple tasks at once.
"Jesus, Cas, I didn't mean it like that," Dean apologized as he shook his head before laying it down on the angel's firm chest. He'd never thought he'd be in this position. Laying on top of a man, but not any man; Castiel, the angel of the Lord. He who gripped him tight and raised him from perdition. The angel who'd he'd been secretly crushing on since Uriel had told him that the other angel liked him.
Sure, the angel could be a real dick sometimes but that didn't stop Dean from slowly falling in love with him. Love? Was he in love with the angel? Nah, that couldn't be it, could it? Sure he liked the angel and did have a crush on him, but that was all there was to it. Just a stupid crush, probably some after effect from when the angel pulled him out of hell. Yes, that was it, it was gratitude; he certainly didn't love the angel.
"Shall I put you to sleep?" Castiel's voice brought him out of his musings.
"What?" Dean asked groggily as if he'd been asleep.
"I was thinking, maybe if I put you to sleep using my 'mojo' you won't feel any pain," the angel explained.
Dean thought about it. "We could try it," he admitted after considering it. "It's not like anything else will work."
Castiel nodded before pressing two fingers against Dean's forehead, who was asleep right after the fingers touched his head. Carefully Castiel took hold of the hunter's hand and placed it on the blanket, the part which wasn't covered by the trench coat. For a good thirty seconds the hunter didn't seem in pain until he woke up again, screaming.
"Jesus Christ!" He let out and sat upright, momentarily forgetting that he needed to touch the angel. "Oh fucking hell!" he yelled as his legs touched the blanket. Quickly he and the angel moved him back so he was only touching Castiel. "Guess it didn't work," he sighed as he lay his head back.
"I'm sorry," the angel apologized, realizing this time he had been the one hurting the hunter.
"Nah, don't worry about it," Dean shrugged it off. It wasn't as if it was the angel's fault. "Let's just hope Sam comes up with a solution soon."
It took Sam another hour or so before he came back to the motel. Dean saw the silhouette of his brother sneaking inside the room, obviously being silent as not to wake his brother. When Sam turned the lights on and turned to face his brother, he couldn't pretend not to be amused and had to fight back a laugh.
"Don't say anything," Dean growled out, annoyed at his brother's amusement.
"How can I not, Dean?" Sam replied. "You're lying naked with a man," he said before a laugh escaped him.
"Shut up Sam," Dean growled. If he could he would have gone over to his brother and beat the grin from his younger brother's face.
Sam knew what his brother was thinking, and it only made his smile grow bigger.
"Did you find anything?" Dean asked a little hopeful.
"Yeah, but I'm not sure how helpful it is," Sam admitted and sat down on his own bed as both men on Dean's bed turned to face him. He fought back another smile; it wasn't all that funny,it was more how comfortable both men seemed in each other's arms.
"What is it?" Dean asked impatient.
"I haven't figured out exactly what curse it is because it's one part of a ten bundle curse," Sam explained.
"What the hell is a ten bundle curse?" Dean asked out loud.
"Basically it's ten different curses, but they all have the same incantation," the youngest Winchester told the men in the opposite bed.
"So what, I've been hit with ten curses?" the oldest hunter asked a little scared. That really didn't sound good.
"No, you've been hit with one curse but since there's ten curses for the same incantation, there's no way of knowing with which curse you've been hit. Because it's a bundle curse it's never reported what these curses are."
"So, you're saying I've been hit with an unnamed curse and there's nothing we can do about it?" Dean concluded.
"I'm sure there's a cure," Sam said. "The last bit I'm not able to read. I brought a copy with me; maybe Cas can make it out." The younger Winchester knew that Castiel was able to read many languages and hoped that he would be able to figure out what it meant.
"Give it to me," Castiel said and wanted to get up but was stopped by Dean with a look saying "don't move or I'll kick your ass", so he stayed put.
Sam handed Castiel the piece of paper and the angel read through it carefully. "Do you know what it says?" Sam asked anxiously.
"Yes, it's old Enochian much older than I am," Castiel answered, "but it's hard to translate." He thought a moment about how to translate the text. "I believe it would roughly translate to 'The person hit by the curse must participate in loving copulation'."
"Okay, cool," Dean said before frowning. "What the hell does that mean?"
Both Sam and Castiel looked at each other before facing Dean. "No idea," Sam said and Castiel nodded.
"So basically we're back to square one?" Dean asked and moved. Which wasn't his best idea as his feet came into contact with the bed, and he yelled out in pain as his feet began to burn. "Jesus Christ, it's getting worse," he gasped out as the fire slowly started to diminish. He was lucky Castiel had held him firmy so he wouldn't move away and injure himself more.
"We need to find the cure and fast," Castiel told Sam but kept his eyes on the hunter in his arms. "I'm not sure how long he can keep this up."
Sam nodded and immediately went to his laptop to surf the Internet. Maybe he would be able to find something there now that he had the translation of the cure.
"You should get some more sleep, Dean," the angel told the older Winchester.
"I don't think I'll be able to fall asleep, Cas," Dean replied, keeping his eyes closed as he tried to focus on anything else but the pain he still felt in his feet.
"I'll help you," Castiel answered.
"Okay," Dean replied. "Make sure I don't touch anything," he said and waited for Castiel to nod his head before he let the angel perform his mojo and knock him out.
A silence fell over the room as the angel made sure Dean didn't move much while Sam searched the Internet.
Sam turned to face the angel a few moments later and watched. His brother was asleep in the angel's arms and looked rather comfortable. It was weird to see his brother lying naked on top of an angel, a male angel, but it was better than the alternative. He really didn't prefer to see his brother in pain.
He thought about the cure for the curse. "Loving copulation?" What could that possibly mean? Copulation could mean sex...did that mean his brother needed to have sex? But then it wouldn't say 'loving copulation'... Did he have to have sex with someone he loved?
"Castiel, I was thinking," Sam began; it was always best to discuss this with someone else before jumping to conclusions. "The cure said loving copulation, right?" At the angel's nod he continued. "Does that mean that Dean needs to have...uhm...you know...intercourse..." Sam felt a blush come up as he talked about sex with an angel but quickly continued, "with someone he loves?"
The angel took a moment to rearrange Dean as he was moving again before considering Sam's words. "It's possible," he replied, nodding his head. "But if I understand the message correctly then it means something deeper than just love." Castiel shot an irritated look at the sheet with the cure on it, annoyed that he wasn't able to express to the hunter what it exactly said. He was never good at remembering the old Enochian language. It was much more difficult than the normal Enochian even more difficult than old demon.
"So the love of a brother is out of the question?" Sam asked and held his breath, hoping he wouldn't have to sleep with his brother because, really, he didn't want to do that.
"No, even deeper than brothery love," Castiel answered as Sam let out a sigh of relief.
"That's good," he said before he could stop himself and was glad his brother was asleep. He really did love his brother, but under no circumstances was he going to have sex with him. "Which means Bobby is out of the question as well." Sam mentally went through all the people they knew to decide who loved Dean. "Does it need to be a soul connection?" Sam asked as he thought about what he had shared with Jess. He knew they had been soul mates and wondered if that would be needed to break the curse.
"A soul connection is rather rare; nothing is stronger than that," Castiel observed. "It's possible that that is what's needed to break the curse."
"The only person Dean has ever said he loves is Cassie, but I don't think he loves her anymore. I also doubt they are soul mates..." Sam told Castiel as he thought about the people in his brother's life who he'd loved.
Castiel didn't know who this Cassie person was, but if she would be able to help Dean he'd get her.
"I know he loves Ben but...I don't know if he loves Lisa," Sam continued.
"This Lisa, who is she?" Castiel asked.
"She's an old flame of Dean's," Sam explained. "She has this kid that Dean really loves or maybe he just wants what they have, you know, a family."
"You need to be sure, Sam," Castiel told him. "If he has intercourse with someone he doesn't love, or is not his soul mate in this case, he could very well die."
Both hunter and angel were silent for a while as they thought about the angel's words. Did Dean actually have a soul mate? The older Winchester had always pushed everyone away who tried to get close to him, but that didn't mean he didn't love anyone.
Could he be in love without knowing it himself? Sam thought as he stared at his sleeping brother.
Castiel was having similar thoughts. He realized that Dean had to be in love in order for the curse to work on him. It was a few thousand years old and only worked on someone who was in love. It could very well be that the hunter was in love with someone but didn't even know himself, but the curse had found the inkling of love stashed away in Dean's soul and attached itself to it.
Then another thought crushed through the angel's mind. What if they found the person Dean was in love with; how are they going to have intercourse? Whenever someone or something touched him, he was screaming out in pain. Well, everyone but him...
Wait, was Dean in love with him?
The thought was so shocking that Castiel loosened the hold he had on Dean, making the hunter fall down to the ground.
"Jesus Fucking Christ!" was heard from beside the bed as a chair fell over where Sam had been sitting when he stood up in haste at the rumble. "Damnit, Cas," Dean yelled before starting to scream as his whole body was consumed in pain.
Shocked out of his trance, Castiel stood up and picked the older hunter up, relieving him from the pain.
"Damnit, Cas, what the fuck happened?" Dean asked in rage.
"Forgive me," Castiel said, still a little shocked, and his eyes softened as he looked into the hunter's green eyes.
Sam stood watching the two men in silence. He didn't like feeling helpless especially not if he wasn't able to help his brother, but knew there was nothing he was able to do.
"You love me." It was those three words that explained everything to the younger hunter. It explained why Castiel's touch didn't hurt his brother. It explained why the angel had thrown his brother onto the ground and it explained why the angel was looking at Dean in wonder.
"NO, I don't!" Dean exclaimed, flabbergasted by the angel's words. He most definitely wasn't in love with the angel! The angel kept staring at him ,which made him uncomfortable, and he lowered his head. Not able to walk away when these moments happened was unnerving to the older hunter.
"My touch doesn't hurt you while Sam's does." Castiel stopped when he noticed Dean's confused look.
"What does that have to do with anything?" he asked, not seeing the point.
"The curse is thousands of years old, Dean; if you hadn't been in love the curse would have rebounded off you," Castiel explained. "The only cure for these types of curses is having intercourse with someone you love. It has to be a deeper love than that of your brother, Dean," the angel told the hunter, already knowing what Dean would say.
Dean took a moment to think about the angel's words. So that's what 'loving copulation' means, he thought as he shook his head. "No, it must mean something else," he said shaking his head.
"Dean," Castiel began.
"No, Cas," the hunter interrupted him.
"Dean, you know it's the truth," Sam said and realized it was the truth when he said it out loud. The youngest Winchester didn't understand how he hadn't noticed it before. Now that he thought about it it was rather obvious. Dean always spoken about what a bunch of dicks the angels were, except for Castiel. He'd always talked fondly of the angel. At the time Sam had thought it was because he was the one who got him out of hell, but now he realized it meant much more than that. Yes, his brother did love the angel, but did he even realize it himself?
"Not you too," Dean groaned as he closed his eyes. "You know this is already uncomfortable without being naked and carried by another man so guess how über uncomfortable it is now."
"Dean," Castiel tried again. "I will help you. If it means I have to have intercourse with you to break the curse, I'll do it."
"Christ, Cas!" Dean exclaimed. "I'm not going to have sex with you."
"Okay, this is getting way uncomfortable for my taste," Sam said as he grabbed his jacket. "I'm gonna go...to...uhm...the library. Yeah, the library." He was out the door before his brother or the angel could say anything else.
"Dean," the angel began again but was interrupted when Dean shook his head.
"No, just no," he said and luckily for him the angel didn't say anything else. For the moment,at least, giving him time to think about what the angel had said to him. Could it be true? Was he in love with the angel? He may have considered it before, but he'd never thought he was in love with him. Dean hadn't let himself fall in love with him, so sure that it was forbidden and that the angel wouldn't want him. Not to mention that the angel would leave him once his task was done here on earth. How could Dean let himself fall in love with Castiel?
Castiel knew that Dean needed a moment to sort his thoughts out and decided to give the hunter the time he needed. Knowing the position the hunter was currently in, being carried bridal style, was uncomfortable for him, the angel sat back down on the bed, taking Dean with him.
He took a moment to take a peek at the hunter's thoughts. It was obvious the hunter was confused. The feelings he hadn't allowed himself to feel were now searing into his heart. There was love, confusion but most of all, guilt.
"There's nothing to feel guilty about, Dean," Castiel said before he could stop himself knowing the hunter didn't like it when he read his thoughts.
"Are you sure about that, Cas? I'm lusting after an angel of the Lord a male angel at that. There's probably a special place reserved in hell for people like me," the hunter replied miserably forgetting for a moment that the angel was reading his thoughts.
It was then that Castiel realized that the hunter was indeed in love with him but was afraid. Looking into his heart, the angel realized the hunter was afraid of being punished for loving an angel, Castiel leaving him, and worse, the angel rejecting him.
The angel had never allowed himself to think about it, but he had been in love with the hunter ever since Castiel pulled him out of hell. Dean's soul had shone so brightly that nothing else seemed to catch his eyes. Where ever he went, Dean's soul would always shine the brightest; nothing could compare to the hunter's soul. It was one of the things that had captured him most about the hunter.
"There is nothing wrong with loving one another," Castiel told the hunter.
"Oh yeah? Isn't there something in the bible that says 'ye mustn't love another man'?" Dean wasn't certain what it said in the bible, for he hadn't read that part yet but knew there was something about that in the book.
"I'm not a man, Dean, I'm an angel," Castiel replied. "Besides the bible isn't always right about things. It was written by men, after all."
"What does that mean? Didn't God tell the guys to write it down or something?"
"Yes, those who wrote the bible had been talking to God but everything has still been interpreted by humans and humans interpreted things as they wanted."
"How do you mean?" Dean asked, grateful for the subject change for the time being.
"It's very simple," Castiel explained carefully. He knew what the hunter was doing but decided to give him this. "If I say car, you'd probably think about your own car, am I correct?"
"Definitely." Dean smirked as he thought about his beloved Impala and how he was already missing taking a ride with her.
"I actually meant a different car," Castiel told him, proving his point.
"So your'e saying the bible, which is supposed to be God's words, is full of crap?"
"No, Dean, there are many truths in the bible but not all of them are accurate," the angel explained. "In God's eyes, loving another man is no different than loving a woman."
"Well, that's good, I guess," Dean replied, not knowing what else to say and both fell quiet again.
"Dean, will you let me help you?" Castiel asked, almost desperately. He really wanted to help his hunter but knew that if Dean didn't allow it he wouldn't be able to.
"I don't know, Cas," Dean only said. He started to realise that he was indeed in love with Castiel, but was it really smart to open his heart to the angel? The hunter sighed. I guess I'm already too late, he thought as he felt a shiver go through him when the angel ran his hands down his back.
"You're cold," Castiel observed as he started running his hands up and down the hunter's back.
"Please, Cas, stop," Dean whispered as he felt his body starting to react to the angel's movements.
The angel didn't stop his movements but studied the hunter. Dean was enjoying his touch but was telling him to stop? Why was that? Suddenly it clicked inside him; he realized why the hunter was asking him to stop. He was enjoying it too much and his body was starting to react.
"If you really want me to stop, Dean, I will, but I think you don't want me to," Castiel whispered as he leaned towards the hunter. He was grateful he had positioned them like this, so they were face to face, for now he was able to kiss him. Softly, so Dean would be able to see his intentions, he leaned in further and placed his lips against the hunter's. A sigh escaped his lips at the first contact of mouths but he wasn't sure what to do after that.
Luckily for him, Dean seemed to give in and started moving his lips against his own before running his tongue against his lips, sending a shiver down the angel's spine. Castiel opened his mouth to let the hunter in and couldn't help but moan when their tongues started dueling.
"Dean," the angel moaned as he pulled Dean's body closer to his own.
"Shit, Cas," Dean breathed against the angel's lips. "You're so sexy." The hunter went in for another kiss as he raised his hands to run them through Castiel's hair.
"Dean," Castiel moaned again as the hunter started rotating his hips, looking for some friction against his aching need. The angel felt his own body starting to respond to what the hunter was doing and couldn't help but moan into the hunter's mouth.
"Shh...I know," Dean broke the kiss and stared at the angel. Seeing the bulge in the angel's pants made him smirk. "Let's take care of that, shall we?"
Castiel moaned at those words not exactly knowing what it meant but he knew he wanted to share this with Dean and no other.
"Lie back," Dean told him and the angel did as he was told, taking the hunter with him being careful so he wouldn't touch the bed.
"My own personal angel bed," Dean smiled down at the angel and leaned in to capture the bruising lips with his own. His hands raised up to undo the buttons of the shirt the angel was wearing before opening it and hissed out in pain when the back of his hand came into contact with the bed. "I better not remove it," he observed. "What happens if this doesn't work?"
Castiel cocked his head, as if to say 'you're asking about this now?', but answered the question none the less. "If you have intercourse with someone else, not your soul mate, while you are under the curse, you could die."
"Please, don't sugar-coat it," Dean replied sarcastically. "How do you know you're my soul mate?" The hunter shook his head. "Shit, it's come to this. I've turned into a bad chickflick movie."
"Can you not feel my soul reaching out to yours? Can you not feel how they ache to be joined at last?" Castiel asked as his eyes bored into Dean's.
"I don't know," Dean admitted. Sure he could feel this pull towards the angel; was that his soul reaching out to Castiel's?
Castiel didn't know what to say to that so he just reached up to take Dean's lips into a passionate kiss. His hands had started wandering of their own accord, going up and down Dean's back as if they had a mind of their own.
"Dean, more," Castiel moaned, not sure how to continue their love making.
"Not sure how to continue?" Dean asked with a smirk. "Geeze, Cas, you've been around for thousands of years and never even bothered to educate yourself in the pleasures of the flesh?"
"I've never needed it," Castiel defended himself.
"Guess I'll just have to teach you," Dean replied, his smirk growing bigger as he sat up, being careful to only touch Castiel - knowing that the mood would be broken if another shot of pain went through him.
Cut go to my website to read the entire fanfiction: deepinmysoul .net or asheridan. livejournal .com
"Damn, that was amazing," Dean breathed against Castiel's neck as he licked the skin he found there.
"I agree," Castiel replied and shivered when he felt the hunter's tongue against his skin. The angel realized what happened and made the hunter look at him. "You saw my true form," he said in wonder as he realized that Dean's eyes were still intact.
"I did," Dean confirmed, also amazed that his eyes were still whole. He never figured that he would ever see the true form of an angel let alone Castiel's true form. "You were amazing, so breath taking," the hunter told the angel. "Your wings were beautiful."
"You saw my wings?" Castiel was shocked to hear that. Even other angels weren't able to see each other's wings. It was an amazing feeling learning Dean had seen them.
"Yes, wasn't I supposed to see them?" Dean asked a little uncertain, afraid he'd done something he wasn't allowed to.
"I'm amazed you saw my wings...not even my brothers and sisters have seen them," Castiel explained. "It only proves that we are bonded."
"Bonded?" Dean asked, confusion showing on his face. "What the hell does that mean?
"In simple human terms, we are married," the angel explained, carefully, not to frighten the hunter. Castiel knew how scared Dean was of commitment and hoped this little fact didn't make him run away in the opposite direction.
"M...married?" Dean asked, slightly frightened. What the hell did that mean? "So what, we can get divorced?"
Castiel froze, afraid the moment was near. The moment where Dean would leave him. "O...only God can dissolve our bond," he admitted.
"So, you're saying we're blessed by God?" Dean asked and at Castiel's nod, he shook his head. "That just creeps me out," he admitted.
"You have nothing to fear, Dean, no demon or angel could break us apart now."
"What do you mean by that?"
"It means that if you are hurt I'll be able to heal you and you'll be able to heal me," Castiel explained.
"That could come in handy," Dean replied, before laying his head back down on the angel's chest. Every instinct told him to run but this time he didn't listen to them. He listened to his heart instead and his heart told him to stay.
"Did it work?" Castiel asked after a few moments. "Are you cured?"
Carefully, Dean took hold of the blanket and relief shot through him when he felt no pain. "It may be a fluke," he whispered as if he was afraid that if he spoke louder the pain would come back. "We should keep doing this in case it's a fluke."
Castiel couldn't help the smile that spread on his face. "Wait," Dean said which made the angel's smile drop afraid that the pain had come back.
"Is that a smile? Is Castiel, the angel of the Lord, actually smiling?" Dean joked
"You bring it out of me," Castiel replied with a shrug, the smile back on his lips.
Dean smiled and turned his head, breathing in the smell of his angel. His? Yes, the angel was his now. Bonded, Castiel had said. They were married and the only one who was able to break their bond was God himself. "Wait, you said only God is able to break the bond. What happens when one of us dies?"
"Then we'll both go to Heaven," Castiel answered.
"If I go there," Dean mumbled.
"You will go to Heaven, Dean," Castiel said and took the hunter's head between his hands and made him look at him. "You are the righteous man, Dean; the only reason you went to hell was because of the deal. You haven't done anything in your entire life, this one and the one before, to earn a spot in hell."
Dean closed his eyes, when he saw the love shining in the angel's eyes. The love he'd never seen before today. He wasn't able to handle it at the moment. "And when is that?"
"I don't know the future, Dean, but I'm certain you'll live through this and die as an old grumpy man."
"Grumpy? I think you have me confused with Sam," Dean replied as he looked down at the angel and realized that for the first time he actually wanted things. He wanted to live the res of his life with Castiel by his side. Maybe even own a house, with a spare room for Sammy of course. Get a regular day job and hunt on the weekends...
"I would like that as well," Castiel broke through his thoughts.
"Are you reading my mind again, Cas? I thought I asked you not to do that?" Dean asked, a little annoyed. He hated it when someone else was inside his head.
"Forgive me, Dean, but your thoughts are rather loud and I'm not able to shut them out," Castiel looked apologetic so Dean wasn't able to stay mad at him.
"First we have to get through this apocalypse crap," Dean said as he sighed.
"I'm sure we'll be fine," Castiel replied.
"How can you be certain?"
"Because we have God on our side," Castiel replied with a tiny smile.
"You're a hopeless romantic at heart, aren't you?" Dean asked and moved his head so he was able to kiss the angel.
"Hello," Sam's voice asked through the door.
"Shit, it's Sam," Dean said as he moved to grab the blanket and tried to cover himself with it. "Shit, help me, Cas."
Castiel smiled and used his angelic powers to cover them both up. "You can come in, Sam," he called out to the younger Winchester outside.
The door opened, and Sam walked in. "Well, at least you're covered up this time," he remarked with a smile. "So, I guess you are okay."
"Yes, Cas did his magic and I'm all better now," Dean replied with a smile still lying on the angel's chest not moving away from him.
"I'm being called, Dean," Castiel interrupted the Winchester brothers. "I'll return as soon as I can."
"Okay," Dean answered unsure of why Castiel would be called. "Don't forget to dress yourself." A smirk was in place as he realized the angel had to get up to get dressed.
Castiel, however, had other plans in mind and just willed his clothes back onto his body. He gave Dean, who was pouting at him, a kiss before flying away.
Dean sighed and turned to sit up, wrapping the blanket around his body as he faced his brother.
"So, you two are like together now?" Sam asked a little uncertain.
"Yeah, I think so," Dean replied a little afraid of what his brother would say about him now that he was dating a man.
"That's cool," Sam said, not knowing what else to say.
"'That's cool'? That's all you have to say?" Dean asked, bewildered.
"Yeah, Dean, what else do you want me to say?"
"How about it's wrong to date another man? Or you're gay? Something."
"I'm not Dad, Dean." The words cut Dean like a knife. Would his dad really disapprove? "I'm not saying Dad would disapprove, Dean, but he would want to know a little more. I, however, am happy if you're happy. Does Cas make you happy, Dean?"
Dean nodded, not saying anything.
"Good, that's all I need to know. Now, could we possibly go to sleep? I'm exhausted!"
Dean laughed before nodding his head. "Yeah, of course. I'm just going to take a shower." Dean stood up, taking the blanket with him. "Sammy?" He said turning back to his brother who was already changing his clothes. "Thanks."
Sam just nodded at his brother, knowing how much his support meant to him.
Dean walked into the bathroom and looked into the mirror wanting to know if the curse had left any marks on him after turning the water on. First he took a look at his arm, the one Sam had touched when he tried to help him back at the cabin. Luckily, the mark was gone.
There was no mark on him except for the scars he had before he entered the cabin. Well, those and the marks Castiel had left on him during their lovemaking.
He let the blanket fall to the ground before stepping into the shower, letting the warm water run down his body as he closed his eyes. This certainly wasn't how he'd thought the day would play out but he was glad it did. Finally, he'd been able to be honest with himself.
He was in love with Castiel, the angel of the lord, and they had made love. Also been bonded, all in one day. Sure, he wasn't quite sure what it meant to be bonded to an angel but he found that he was willing to find out as long as Castiel was by his side.
He shook his head; his thoughts were awfully turning into a bad chick flick movie. Arms encircled him, making him react, hitting whoever was behind him. Before his fists could make contact they were held and Dean saw it was Castiel holding onto him. "Damn Cas, don't do that."
"Forgive me, Dean," Castiel apologized but sounded anything but sorry.
Dean shook his head as the angel was standing in the shower with him, fully clothed. "You do know that if you take a shower you should be naked," the hunter told him.
Not a second later after he said that, he felt a familiar wisp of air against his skin and noticed the angel was as naked as he was. "Much better," Dean whispered before claiming the angel's lips with his own. "We have to be quiet," the hunter said. "Sammy's in the room."
Castiel nodded before kissing the hunter again. "What did the angels wants?" Dean asked as he took hold of their members and started stroking them up and down.
"You really want to talk about that now?" Castiel asked as he licked the skin where neck met shoulder. "They wanted an update," the angel replied as he buckled against Dean.
"Nothing of import, then," Dean concluded out loud.
"Dean..." Castiel moaned out loud when Dean sped up his movement.
"Shh," Dean's breath whispered against his skin making him shiver before claiming the angel's lips again silencing Castiel's moan with his mouth so they wouldn't alarm Sam.
Dean loved the feeling of the angel's cock rubbing against his own. He sped up his hand wanting, no, needing to relief the pressure. Castiel was buckling against him, the hunter was certain that if the angel had been human he wouldn't have been able to stand...Dean was facing the same problem and leaned heavily against the angel knowing he would be able to support them both.
Without any warning, Castiel came all over their stomachs and Dean's hand and the hunter soon followed. "Shit," he let out as he tried to catch his breath.
They stayed under the warm spray for a few more moments, letting the water rush over them before climbing out. "Are you staying or going?" Dean asked after a moment of silence knowing full well the angel could be called away any time.
"Staying," Castiel replied as he watched Dean dry himself off.
"Then you should dry yourself off and wear some boxers or something," the hunter noted as he let his eyes travel up and down the angel's body.
Castiel frowned in confusion. "But you like seeing me like this."
"Oh, I sure do," Dean chuckled. "But I don't want Sammy to see you like this." The hunter walked over to the angel before claiming his lips in a passionate kiss. "I don't share," he growled against the lips before deepening the kiss. "Especially not with my brother."
Castiel cocked his head before nodding. Within a second he was dry and wearing his clothes again. When he looked back at Dean he noted the hunter looked disappointed. "What's wrong, Dean?"
"Nothing, just hoped to get you into bed without that ridiculous trench coat," he said, shrugging his shoulders before pulling on a fresh pair of boxers.
"You're upset," Castiel noted. "I don't understand why." He cocked his head trying to read the oldest Winchester.
"It's nothing Cas," Dean said, shaking his head. "Let's just go to bed and get some sleep."
"I don't require sleep, Dean," Castiel said in a tone that clearly suggested that Dean should have known that fact.
"No, but I do, and you're my pillow, so come on and get into bed, featherhead," the hunter said as he dragged the angel out of the bedroom. He glanced over at his brother's bed and noted that he was already asleep. Good, the hunter thought, less awkward.
The hunter told the angel to lie down on the bed and snuggled up to him once he was settled. "If you ever tell Sam I'm cuddling with you, I'm going to kill you," Dean warned the angel knowing he'd never hear the end of it.
"I heard you, Dean," Sam's voice was heard from the other bed, obvious amusement in his tone.
"Well, shit," Dean mumbled against the angel's chest. "Go to sleep, Sammy," he told his brother when he heard him move around in the bed obviously wanting to see something funny.
"I'm too tired to think of anything to say anyway," Sam commented and turned back around before trying to fall asleep.
"I don't understand what's wrong with cuddling," Castiel's voice broke through the silence of the room making the youngest Winchester laugh out loud.
Dean shot his brother a look as if to say 'shut up' even though his brother wasn't able to see it. "Absolutely nothing, Cas," he said, leaning up to kiss the angel before lying back down. "Absolutely nothing," he whispered again as he let himself relax against his angel.
Even though they still had a war to fight, for now everything was perfect in Dean's life. He was lying in the arms of the man he loved. His brother was safe and, hopefully, asleep in the other bed. Yes, everything was wonderful for the hunter and tomorrow would be another day to fight the big bad evil of this world but today...today life was perfect and nothing in the entire world could change that little fact.
03 February 2012