It had been a week since the gala, a week since Jackie exploded all her anger onto Catherine. She had regretted that every day. True, Catherine had done nothing but break her heart at every single given opportunity and she had all the rights to blame the older woman for all her pain, but she couldn't. Part of it was her fault; she was the one who walked out without putting up a fight, the one who ran away without so much of a word and she was the one who foolishly thought Catherine would still... love her.
Jackie curled up into a fetal position on her bed, she had been crying for hours and she couldn't bring herself to get out of bed. She wrapped her arms around herself and sinks deeper into her covers.
For the first time since her visit to Bloomington, she realized what a mistake it was to seek closure with Catherine. It was a mistake because she still loves her. Jackie thought that the two years apart would be enough for her to get over the tall blonde, but she was wrong. Her heart aches for Catherine, even through all the drama she still craves for her. A life without Catherine is an empty, loveless life and it's not a life that she wants. Fame, money, reputation, those things can all go to Hell if she can't have love.
Jackie continues to weep quietly, unbeknown Ashley was standing outside of her room, listening to her heart wrenching sobs. Ashley carefully turned the door knob and entered the room silently. As she approaches her best friend's fetal form, she placed her hand on Jackie's head and gently moves Jackie's bangs behind her ear.
"Jacks... It's okay." Ashley climbs onto the bed and spoons Jackie from the back.
Jackie lets herself enveloped into her friend's embrace, she gave her a small nod and turns towards Ashley and cried.
Ashley wrapped her arms around Jacqueline, drawing soothing circles with her palms and hums a quiet tune.
Catherine stared outside of her new offices' drop down windows. It was a beautiful day, the sky is blue and the sun was shining brightly and yet she can't bring herself to appreciate the view. Her eyes casted down onto the pedestrians, there were different kinds of people walking down the streets: couples, families, business men, beggars and lonely individuals.
'Lonely' Catherine sniffed. This was all her fault, perhaps the majority of it was her fault but that doesn't give her the excuse of treating Jackie the way she did.
Catherine willed her hand up, slowly placing it onto of the glass window as if she wanted to reach for something; someone.
All the little moments she had with Jackie flashes before her eyes. Ever since Jackie's disappearance, she had forced herself to not think of the young blonde.
She missed all the little things they used to do, sneaking around in the library, holding hands in an empty classroom, or even just the not-so-subtle glances they give each other in the hallway.
She missed it all, but most of all, Catherine missed her. Her ray of sunshine, 'And I fucked it up'.
Catherine turned on her heels and slummed down on her chair, hiding her face into her hands and lets out a groan.
"What am I going to do...?" She spoke softly into the emptiness of her grand office.
"I hate you!" Jackie cried, "You left me! Not the other way around! What happened to 'I will never want anybody but you,' huh?" She glared upwards to meet the clear blue eyes. She felt a round of tears rushes to her eyes; she quickly tilted her head downwards, not wanting the person to see her tears.
"I loved you... I loved you so much." She croaked, running a hand through her brown hair.
"I'm... I'm sorry," Jackie saw a hand reaching towards her. She quickly flinched away.
"No! You think you can just apologize and everything will be freaking dandy again! But it won't! Not this time, Miranda!" She shouted angrily at an older woman, standing in front of her with a pained expression plastered.
"Okay, cut!" A rough voice called out from a few feet away.
The tension between the older woman and Jackie quickly dissolves.
Gone were the tears as Jackie grinned at her co-star.
"That was great, Jackie." The white-haired woman said warmly as she patted Jackie's shoulder.
"Thanks, Holly!" Jackie's smile brightens another notch.
Ever since she ran off on Catherine, she told her agent to sign her onto the first movie that wanted her. She needed to get away, and the quickest way she knew to do that was work.
For the whole week, she had buried herself into work. Travelling made it easier for her to cope. The exhaustion took Catherine away from her mind.
Everything was fine, until she had to act out the romantic scene; the romantic scene in which her character was completely furious with her ex, a high-profile older woman. To be exact, her character's past employer.
Jacqueline shook away her thoughts. This was hitting too close to home.
'A whole week...' she thought, it had been seven freaking days since her encounter with Catherine and yet the older woman had done nothing to reach out for her.
'So much for saying sorry.' She rolled her eyes at herself, mostly for hoping that maybe, just maybe Catherine still wanted her.
"Foolish. That's what you are..." She mumbled under her breath.
"It's never foolish to fall in love, m'dear." A gentle voice came from behind her. She turned around and found her co-star standing a few feet away, holding two cups of coffee.
Holly closed the distance and stood next to the younger blonde, handing a steaming cup to Jackie.
"Holly..." She breathed out softly, nodding her head in thanks as she took the cup of beverage. Jackie smiled, "You're right... Being in love is never foolish, but running away from love... that's foolish." She brought the cup to her lips and took a tentative sip. The coffee was scalding hot; she nearly winced as the liquid made its way down her throat.
Jackie placed the drink on a nearby cart, folding her arms in front of her.
Holly simply hummed in response. "Maybe it's time to stop and turn around."
Jackie stared at the older actress for a minute before nodding apprehensively.
The two women spent the rest of their break standing in silence.
Catherine had her gaze focused onto her cell phone, as if there was a possibility that the phone will dial Jackie's number on its own.
She had long abandoned her work four hours ago. How was she supposed to work when her mind was completely overwhelmed with the image of her ex-lover? She reached out hesitatingly for her phone. She traced the outline of the gadget with her long fingers. One click was all it takes. She simply had to hit dial, it was easier than adding one and one together. But she couldn't... 'What if she's busy? What if her phone isn't on? What if she doesn't want to talk to me... what if she's with someone else?' There were simply too many 'what-ifs' to consider.
Catherine frowned at the device. She cannot let the 'what-ifs' take over her life, she won't let it. With a new-found courage, she unlocked her phone and dialled Jackie's number.
As soon as the dialing tone began, her so-call courage had dissipated completely.
'Oh God... please pick up, Jackie... Please pick up...' She scrunched her eyes tightly, trying to will her love to pick up the call... to give them a chance to talk it out.
It felt like a century had passed and still, the call was not picked up. Catherine sighed, letting the last flickering flame of hope to die out. 'Of course she wouldn't want to talk to you, you fool!'
As she was about to end the call, the dial tone was gone and in its place, a gentle voice spoke.