One of those days
A/N: So this is a one-shot about Carlise and Esme. At the moment they are my favorite couple, I'm totally obsessed with them and can't explain why? :). Enjoy!
Nurse Margaret smiled at me and I smiled back. She was one of the few woman I could smile at without feeling uncomfortable. She was young, pretty and happily married.
„Good morning Dr. Cullen."
„Good morning, Margaret, how are you feeling today?"
She smiled, „I have two children who have been puking all night, I'm great."
I chuckled, „Have you been here all night?"
„I'll come by later", I promised, „Maybe I can help."
„Thank you Dr. Cullen", she grinned, before ducking into a room, where a child was throwing up loudly.
I had only walked a few steps, when I was called back by a different nurse.
„Dr. Cullen, there's a phone call for you, it's your son."
Smiling I took it from her.
„Carlisle. It's Esme. She's having one of her days."
I didn't hesitate a second.
„Emma, I need to leave. I have a situation at home."
The nurse only nodded. It happened rarely that people disagreed with me.
„She's thinking about Charles a lot more than the last time, so you might want to be careful when touching here."
„Yes, thank you Edward."
I hung up.
„Are you going home, Dr. Cullen?" Margaret grinned at me, „I thought you would help me out with my kids?"
I lifted my shoulders, „I can only be one of the two Margaret: A perfect doctor or a perfect husband."
She smiled, „I'm glad your the second."
„So am I."
When I went home I hurried, but I concentrated on not breaking any rules or giving the police any reason to stop me.
Edward was still at home, when I arrived. He wouldn't leave Esme alone.
I only nodded. He didn't need to tell my any of this. Even if he was the one to read minds, I knew exactly, better than anyone else, what was going on in Esmes head.
She was lying on our bed. Curled together, her knees were pulled up to her chest, her arms wrapped them tightly.
I stood in the door way.
"Esme. Do you want me to lie down with you?"
Her right hand reached out to me-shaking-and I walked towards her.
I took her hand in mine and lied down next to her, my arms wrapping around her body. I didn't try to break her grip and I didn't talk to her.
We laid there for some time. When you're a vampire it doesn't matter how much time passes. You barely notice it. Time becomes irrelevant. Normal. Self-evident.
After some amount of time had passed, she moved.
If she were human her body probably would have ached. It would have been stiff.
She pressed her face against my chest and this time I counted. 30 seconds later her body shook with terrible dry sobs.
My hands traced circles on her back, they weren't supposed to be calming. I just wanted her to know, that she was not alone.
"He was so small!"
Over the years with her I had learned to differ between "he" the baby and "he", Charles, her ex-husband.
"They took him away and I couldn't follow! I tried to but they wouldn't let me!"
"I know, Esme."
There was no need to tell her, that it wasn't her fault, that her baby had died because he had been ill, not because she had been a bad mother. That she couldn't have followed no matter how hard she had tried because the Doctors had brought the tiny corpse away.
"I should have died! Don't you think I should have died, because he had to die too?"
"No. Your death wouldn't have changed any thing."
"I'm scared he'll come and hurt me again!"
This had been confusing at first. She switched between the two "he"s very quickly and without any explanation. I learned how to react.
"He will never hurt you again, Esme. You know that. He's dead."
Charles name was never allowed to be mentioned. That was fatal.
"He could be a vampire, just waiting to attack."
"You know what would happen then."
I despised killing another creature. I really and truly did. But Charles was the one person I wanted to destroy.
"He was beautiful and he had such a strong grip."
"I fell asleep...he wouldn't have died if I wouldn't have fallen asleep, if they hadn't taken him away from me."
He would have died, because he had been sick. And she might have crushed him in her sleep.
She continued to sob for a while and I held her. I didn't speak, there were no words to heal a mothers broken heart. It had taken me very long to accept that. This was something I couldn't help Esme with.
After a while her sobs faded. They got softer until they stopped completely. I still didn't say anything. I didn't move. I waited for her.
She lifted her head, slowly.
She sat up, "You had to leave work early?"
"Do you think it will ever get better?"
My hand reached out to touch her face gently, "I think you will have a lot of time to figure that out."
Esme closed her eyes, "I'm sorry you still have to put up with this."
I pulled her against me, pressing my lips to her forehead softly,
"It's just one of those days, Esme. Don't worry about it. Everyone gets them."