The day had been hard, emotionally relentless. Too many twists and turns in my inner being to find any peace and comfort. Inwardly I am tired, I am ready to completely forget about it all and detach myself from that world.
Bella is to be my saviour, allowing me to find that comfort within her embrace and just being with her. Sometimes words do not need to be spoken for there to be an understanding, especially between people that have a connection such as us.
It is always a breath of fresh air knowing she will be there when I return from whatever efforts have held me during the day. A relaxing environment to feel safe and secure.
And there will always be that smile, the one that makes my heart melt yet swell simultaneously with unconditional love. There is a relief in knowing you have someone to fall back on, to always be there for you and for support no matter what the situation.
Even having the person you love knowing what you need at the end of a long and troubling day is a relief. As is that great level of understanding shared between each other.
Of course Bella and I have our off days but then what love doesn't? It's not as though it is very often-only once in a blue moon- that myself and Bella do not see eye to eye. However, the quarrel is, more often than not, resolved quite quickly.
Due to Bella's laid back-ness with everything, we are great for one another.
She is the south to my north.
At times I can become excessively over excited, almost to the point of no return, yet, being around Bella, she will pull me back to that line in the middle, the equator, and we balance each other out there.
My feelings, however, are the complete opposite at this moment. I am emotionally spent from the whole day and, for me, I am far too down.
Right now I need her, my Bella. Too much in fact.
I want that love-the love only there for me-to encase me in a bubble and to comfort me through the tears I will undoubtedly let fall.
She is there waiting in the dim light for my return, the glow hovering across the cosiness of the room ready to soothe me. Her greeting is with a smile reserved just for me. It stretches to her eyes lighting them up. That spread of a smile is the brightest thing in the room. Never has there ever been an action or such an expression that has said so much and held this level of intensity of emotion.
My saviour saddens. I observe the change upon her face instantly, the crease forming between her eyebrows and the frown that now covers her face. It is probably in response to seeing my own expression. Her eyes search my face and my body language to gather an understanding, in an attempt to interpret what I am feeling.
It doesn't take her long. Never does.
Her feet pad lightly on the soft carpet as she almost flits towards me. Bella's skirt flounces with the movement and under different circumstances that would have made me smile at least, if not grin and laugh and tell her of my amusement, and she would offer me a strange look and I would laugh, more so because of that expression and I would tickle her just to get her to laugh too and we would fall together in a small happiness.
But not today. Today I merely shut my eyes. It is a far cry from that alternative, fantasy almost. Only when I feel warm arms wrapping around my shoulders do I even consider reopening them to come back to this present world, which I very much want to disappear from. They hug me tight and pull me as close as possible. That sinking in and becoming one with Bella comes somewhat naturally to me, even now.
She subtly walks us to the sofa and gently places us on its smooth fabrics and enveloping cushions. I lay my head on her shoulder and turn so my face is pushed within her brunette locks. I am surrounded by that soft caress, the gentle tickling that can only come from hair on skin contact.
Only at that point do I feel comfortable enough to show my emotion through tears. I sob quietly into her clothing and she rocks us back and forth, similar to how you would a baby to calm it down. Few tears fall in the end but their release has helped, even if just a little.
She rests her head atop mine and I hear her breathe in smoothly. Against my hair, I feel a smile form upon her face. Bella tells me often how she loves the scent of my hair, the weavings of the fruit and the perfume and the scent that is 'just me'.
Soothing circles are being drawn on my back once her arms are in a more comfortable position and it would be very easy to fall into a peaceful sleep. In spite of this, I know that would not be the best idea, for the horrors which I know I will encounter once in that state, when not completely comforted, would be too much to bear.
Bella kisses my head and plants more over the cover of my hair, nearing my face with each one.
Those full lips meet my cheek and nip at it slightly; I am surprised to some extent and pull back just a little until she presses harder onto my back with the continuous circles. Not in an aggressive way, just to highlight that she has good intentions and to tell me to try to relax.
I move back into her and Bella continues with her ministrations of her lips on my face. They cross to my ear and take it between their softness, sucking lightly on the skin, although mixing it up with an added bite every now and then. It is a small suspense Bella is leaving me in, not knowing when the short sharp pain will occur.
Her hands stop the movements on my back and mine grip her shoulders tighter. Bella's lips have reached my cheek and they trail kisses to the corner of my mouth. Her hidden tongue flicks out and licks just under my bottom lip and I shiver in response.
A push on my shoulders and I am lying down on the sofa, my head resting on the arm and Bella straddling my hips. She cups my cheek and brushes her thumb across my eyelid. I close my eyes for her and enjoy when I feel a grazing of lips over my own.
There is not enough pressure for my liking but I don't search for it. I wait. Her lips sweep down my neck pausing at my collar bone. Then her tongue peeks out and traces a line up to my other ear. My toes curl and I breathe out heavily.
Bella tilts her face so she can gaze into my eyes. I stare back as intently and I feel her fingers creeping down my body to the hem of my shirt. She pushes it up slightly, never shifting her gaze from my own and makes movements with her fingertips on the smooth, exposed skin.
Slowly her touch shifts upwards, reaching underneath my top. Bella's eyes lower to my lips and I know what is coming. Just a small press of her lips to mine. We barely move for a few moments, even her fingers have stilled. She pushes harder against me and pulls back quickly.
I suck my bottom lip; a little taste of Bella. With my eyes watching her, Bella moves down my body and pulls down my skirt, bit by bit, until it is all the way off and just out of reach of my feet. My thin tights are next to disappear, and I gasp from her touch at the inside of my thighs.
Next, Bella places her finger on my lips and outlines them, then trails it down my chin, down my neck until it reaches the edge of my blouse. Her fingers unfasten the first button and the shirt is soon fully open. As she lifts me up to remove the item, her hand reaches under my back and flicks open my bra.
She comes back to straddling my body and pulls off her own top. Her face is in shadow to me as the lamp is behind her. I don't like it; not being able to see her pretty features and get lost in the deep depths of her eyes.
In the next moment, it doesn't matter though as Bella leans over me and gives me another touch of her lips. I don't put any effort into it, thinking it will be just another short press. Instead, she actually kisses my lips and I follow her lead, quickening our movements, getting out of breath.
Our tongues entwine as we get lost in a regular rhythm. Both our bodies are flush against each other and her hands are hooked around my waist. Mine are on her neck pulling her close to me, angling her face just right. Bella pulls back enough for our lips to unlock and rests her forehead against mine. She places her finger against my lips and lifts her weight off my body, leaving the room.
I take a moment to slow my breath and cool down; my body overheated from that kiss. Every point of my skin where she touched is oh-so-sensitive. My lips are tingling from her touch and I lick them in anticipation of what is to come.
She is back in no time and discards her skirt, allowing it to fall down her legs to the ground.
Bella reaches me and she kneels down on the light carpet next to my face, stroking my cheek. Her fingers tuck a small part of hair behind my ear and she kisses the end of my nose. I cannot yet find it in me to laugh, however I do smile.
She places her hands on the sides of my body and helps me to turn over. I make a pillow with my arms and lay my head on it. The sofa bounces slightly once she comes up on it and Bella arranges herself so either leg is at the side of my waist. She sits back a little, giving me a tiny amount of her pressure.
Quite out of nowhere, I feel a cool, thick gel being applied to the top of my back. I arch into the plump cushions at the difference in temperature until I become used to it and then relax. Delicate hands gently rub it across my skin and the sweet aroma hits my senses intensely.
Bella's fingertips are drawing abstract patterns on my skin as she spreads the oil. The movements are ticklish, especially when she only touches lightly.
Soon her light strokes become more pressurised and she begins to massage my back, gripping my skin tightly and spreading it out. Her hands knead the tight skin, easing out the knots, loosening it up.
I become aware that much more of her weight is now resting upon me. I like it and push upwards into her body.
Bella gathers more oil on her palms and allows it to cascade on my shoulders. I am in the perfect position for a hard shoulder massage and that is what she gives me. Thankfully, Bella knows where the line is between a pleasant massage and one that unnecessarily hurts.
Her fingers dig into my skin and I curl my shoulder blades inwards, dancing with her movements. Her delicate thumbs work wonders with my tense upper body and send me sky high, revelling in the pleasure.
Bella slides her hands down the sides of my body, reaching to the front of it and grazes a part of my breasts as they move down. I arch my back wanting more of that touch and Bella pulls off my bra straps. She tugs the underwear from my body and throws it away from us.
My back is still curled away from the sofa and she moves her arms underneath my body. Her hands begin to touch the skin on my stomach and edge up to the underside of my breasts. She outlines them and then cups them in her palms. A brush of her thumb over my nipples and a moan finally escapes from my mouth.
Almost as a reward for my moan, she bites my shoulder and licks the red skin.
With her hands, I am being rolled back over. I am able to look into her eyes again and I immediately notice a cheeky glint within them. Bella removes her bra from her body and I can look, but I can't touch- not with my arms pinned beneath her legs.
She seductively squeezes the bottle, this time in my view, and I squirm beneath her, rubbing against her legs as the gel-like substance oozes out and pools onto her hands, some of it dripping onto my front. Small, cold droplets dot onto my skin and I tense my stomach muscles.
Bella moves her hands to my stomach and massages the oil into my skin with her palms.
She makes her fingers dance across my front, and then they creep up between my breasts to my chin. She takes a hold of it and pulls my head up to peck my lips a few times.
Whilst my attention is on her mouth, her other hand moves to my breast and gently squeezes it. She encases my nipple between her forefinger and thumb and rolls it around and around. Her fingers pinch it until it just hurts and her head moves from my cheek where it is resting.
She kisses down to that spot on my neck, which makes me want to push her off because it is so ticklish. Bella's teeth are nipping at the skin, and then licking over the redness until it dissipates.
She shifts down my body, licking my chest as she goes and kisses all the flesh of my breasts.
Her lips move to my nipple and I eagerly await her touch. My other breast is receiving feather-light touches and caresses that just excite me further, subsequently hardening my nipples until they are painful.
Bella's soft lips relieve some of the pain as she sucks just lightly on my bud. I am breathing heavily and becoming almost too hot.
Her teeth dare to make me gasp as they scrape over my taut nipple. They even decide to lightly press down on it and gratefully elicit a moan from me.
I lift my head to watch Bella and my God if it's not one of the hottest things I've ever seen; her worshipping my breasts. Her mouth even crosses to my other breast and gives it the same attention. Light caresses, licks of the tongue and a bite here and there. Her fingers pinch my nipple much harder than before and I groan from it, arching up into her.
Bella lifts off me and shifts further down my body. My eyes are watching her intently and as her eye line flicks up to my own, she places her fingertips on my underwear; the last garment left on my body. Slowly removing the clothing, she reveals my flesh and I am holding my breath. She doesn't move her gaze from my own as she tugs down the thin material, eventually plucking it off from around my ankles.
Her tongue peeks out again and she drags it up from my feet, past the side of my calf, to my knee and she nibbles all the way up to my thighs.
Bella's lips brush over my sensitive skin and she sucks on my thighs, leaving numerous small, temporary marks.
She draws a line with her tongue down to my lips and flicks her tongue just at the top, above my nub.
I grip the material of the sofa, waiting in anticipation.
As soon as that touch comes and she is pressing her tongue against my bud, I gasp in a shaky breath.
Bella pushes it around and then her lips wrap around it and she is sucking on my most sensitive part. Her teeth drag over it and I gasp at the delightful feeling.
It is heaven! Pleasurable waves are rolling through me, enticing shivers from within. She eases off and moves her tongue down, ready to lick up the juices pooling from my slit.
Even Bella moans and I just want to explode. Her tongue tenderly nudges open my lips and dips inside. It feels its way around the moist flesh and draws out and up, circling my bud countless times.
I am whimpering uncontrollably now, rolling my hips under her, pushing up into her mouth.
She brings her thumb and finger over to replace her tongue and pinches my nub between them. Bella's skilled tongue moves to my entrance and sinks into my heat. She removes it suddenly, and then begins to plunge that muscle into my sweetness.
My hips are swaying into her mouth, somehow able to move of their own accord. She is expertly using her tongue to tease me until I begin to climb that ladder awaiting a fall into the abyss.
Higher and higher she takes me and I open my legs to give her more space, even though I only want to squeeze them into the sides of her head.
I tell she becomes aware of my impending orgasm and she slows down her movements, effectively stopping my climb into the extreme.
Knowing that she always has a good reason, I don't question her and allow her to do as she wishes. Plus I know that when I do have that release, it will be so much better after holding off. And it's always incredible when Bella's joining me in that ecstasy.
Bella sits up and as I try to level out my breathing, she only goes and seductively licks my juices from around her lips. I make something of a squeak, which she can't help but laugh at.
Before I can even catch my breath, Bella strips off her underwear surprisingly quickly, flinging them across the room. Where they land, I've no idea and honestly couldn't care less.
My heartbeat is racing, hammering loudly in my chest. Bella lifts up my shoulders and aids me in sitting up -my legs are weak from pleasure. Somehow though, we manage and she manoeuvres us so that one of my legs is underneath one of hers and my other one is above hers.
Our bodies are perfectly aligned and we pull close to each other. Lips instantly attract and all I can see and feel and smell and hear and taste is Bella. She takes over all my senses, vastly improving what I can sense and allowing me to know only her, unaware of anything else.
Hands are stroking every inch of skin, fingers gripping strands of hair and tugging as the kiss heats up. Tongues are exploring as though they are in an unknown territory and teeth are grazing lips. They pull and nip and softly bite.
We begin to move, rocking against each other. Our juices are mixing, creating a unique taste. I reach down to bring it to our lips. Flicking out our tongues, we lap at the sweet juice and Bella pulls my finger into her mouth. She greedily sucks it, licking away our taste and glides her teeth down the length of it.
I am gasping at the feeling of the friction created between our hot, writhing bodies and Bella is moaning around my finger.
I free her mouth of my finger and lock our lips again, unable to get enough of Bella. We close the tiny gap between our bodies and start to dance; bumping and grinding, bringing us closer to that climax.
Hands move to nipples, twisting and pinching, pleasuring us further. It's all hot and messy and I'm drunk on Bella, not conscious of anything else.
My muscles are starting to convulse and that burning begins to build in my stomach. I can hear Bella's breath quickening between our frantic kisses.
We move faster and furiously, pushing ourselves to the edge of that ledge. Gasping, caressing, biting, grinding.
And that fire is starting to take over, rushing through my body, blanking my mind and forcing shakes from within.
We've jumped, freefalling high up from that ledge together.
Intense pleasure is all I know and I hold tight of my Bella, just as she is doing to me.
Rocking slowly through the eruptions, calling out Bella's name and hearing her scream mine.
I can't breathe; waves crashing, fireworks exploding. Losing all sense of the outside world. If able to think at all, only about Bella and the bliss she has brought me to.
We fall from a great height, coming down, gasping back our breath. And I open my eyes. Bella's are still squeezed tight, her face eventually breaking into a blissful smile.
Her eyes flutter open, dazed at first until they find mine. There is a shine in them and I'm positive mine have the same dazzle.
She gives me more kisses as we both calm down, yet still hot and passionate ones. Our chests are heaving, attempting to catch our breath back and those last shudders are being drawn from our bodies.
Bella's intoxicating scent still overloads my senses and it makes me want the moment to last forever. I move slightly back and allow my eyes to wander across her face. Swollen lips, red cheeks, half shut eyelids and messy hair. Bella is observing me in the same manner and the look of amusement she gives, informs me that my own image mirrors hers.
Unwillingly, I shift us out of the position we're in and Bella pulls me into her arms. We lay down across the sofa and its snug, but we have little care. My fingers lace with hers as we arrange the blanket around us and I rest my head on her chest.
I allow my eyes to shut and assume Bella is doing the same, dozing in and out of a sleep-like state. At one point I hear her sigh in contentment and I suddenly jerk awake from the unexpected sound. Then I feel her hand massaging my hair, soothing me back to sleep.
I smile; always thinking of me is my saviour.